Meeting Myself, Meeting Others

by Richard Mills, UK

Over the past two years I have been involved with Universal Medicine – attending courses, workshops, private sessions, listening to recordings and reading books. There have been changes in my life as a consequence, such as to my sleep rhythms and diet, but if I were to identify the most significant impact there has been it would be in my relationships.

It may not sound very exciting, but to experience what it truly means to ‘meet’ another person is really quite stunning. We are accustomed to the term ‘meeting someone’ to mean saying hello, or shaking hands and maybe exchanging a few pleasantries. To truly meet another is so much greater than this.

It seems the first thing we must do is ‘meet ourselves’. This is about connecting within, or more accurately, reconnecting within. So many of our relationships have been built upon mutual needs – we are seeking something from the other, maybe approval, maybe recognition, maybe acceptance. Why though, do we need anything from them? My experience is that we are trying to compensate for a deep sense of emptiness inside us. I’ve tried lots of ways of healing that emptiness and must conclude that none of them have truly worked, not long term. What has worked though is to reconnect to who I truly am within. Could it be therefore, that the emptiness so many people feel is the result of being disconnected from their true being?

Universal Medicine has presented me with many ways of reconnecting with my true being; for example, practising the Gentle Breath meditation, a very simple breathing technique. Having used this meditation for about 18 months now, I have felt myself redevelop that connection with my innermost self, and this ‘meeting with me’, has had an amazing effect on my meetings with others. When we have ‘met ourselves’ we remove the neediness from our relationships with others, replacing the ‘neediness’ with a deeper level of respect and an openness to truly be with another. It is then possible to allow the other to be who they are (whether they realise it or not), and to truly meet them without any other agendas. To relate to others in this way is simply joy-full.

A few years ago in my work capacity I attended a presentation by a man described as a ‘Learning Disability Champion’. He had a disability himself, and he presented some statistics about a survey done in America about support for those with Learning Disabilities. The service users were asked “how many of you feel you have been met by your support workers?” The outcome… only 4% said yes, that they felt they had been met. What I observe in my work is that the staff who are truly able to meet others create very different relationships with the people they support, and they rarely encounter what in the business we call ‘challenging behaviour’. I am certain this is because they meet that person’s fundamental need to be truly connected with. However, as the survey reflects, not many people are meeting others this way as a matter of course.

In my opinion, this aspect of what Universal Medicine teaches is crucial. We must all learn to reconnect with ourselves first and yes, love ourselves. Only then can we begin healing our relationships with others and creating harmony and true well-being in our lives.

282 thoughts on “Meeting Myself, Meeting Others

  1. I remember striving for the next goal I had set myself, and then the next, each time never really being satisfied because there was always something missing, the missing link was the connection to myself, as I had always been driven by that empty feeling inside, once I had listened to the first few presentations of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine I realised that I was basically running away from myself, and it was not until I started reconnecting back to myself that I was able to start opening up to true conversations and connections with others.

    1. I love this point Sally. In the pursuit we are in truth running from ourselves. It is when we connect within that things really start to open up.

  2. I remembered first hearing the term meeting myself and others–my entire body was touched to its core, every cell was joyfully saying yes, this is the truth. Allowing my body to confirm this has unfolded the process of meeting myself and others and it is a very inspiring process full of love.

  3. It’s funny just how hard we like to make our lives. For example in the workplace, are we not constantly complaining about customers or clients and how annoying or demanding they are? Do we not always have something to moan about, and usually in regards to people? And yet, if we stayed connected to ourselves, we’d find connection and therefore understanding of others so much more natural, and there would be a million times less to complain about, because like you say here, the people are being met by us rather than judged or treated as a burden, and so they feel less the need to be heard through unnecessary behaviour.

    1. The true business we are in everyday from God is evolution, and truly meeting people is a beautiful part of that.

  4. It is through the honouring of our sensitivity and self-acceptance that we can finally fill up the void from which all addictions come from, for once we meet and embrace our true nature, there is nothing in the world that compares to the fullness of joy and love felt within.

    1. Beautifully said Francisco; meeting ourselves in full, we meet our true nature and therefore we meet the true nature of all others.

    2. Beautifully said Francisco, and doesn’t it bring such understanding to addiction and other behaviours people engage in from that place of desperation to escape the emptiness? We truly miss ourselves, until we can reconnect back to the fullness of joy and love within.

  5. I agree Richard, truly meeting another can only ever happen if we are able to maintain a connection and relationship with ourselves, for how can we possibly meet another if we are not even with ourselves..

  6. Very true Richard, when I feel connected to myself I do not need anything from another. There is a holding that gives space for another to make the choices they choose to align to as I know that what I choose to align to in that moment is what matters to me and to everyone and everything. My responsibility in that moment is to be true to me.

  7. We could then go on to say that every connection or relationship, no matter how small is a reflection for us to deepen our own connection, no matter the context of that connection or what that relationship involves. Thereby deepening how we meet ourselves and then all others.

  8. Yes. It is my experience as I have worked on rebuilding my confidence and self appreciation that I have naturally been able to appreciate others more easily, whereas in the past I found it difficult to understand people and would often feel frustrated by their behaviour or actions etc. The more understanding I have developed for myself, the more open, understanding and compassionate I am with others.

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