My Relationship With the World – I Simply Love People

by Jane Keep, UK  

Long before I met Serge Benhayon I was the sort of person who worked in large organisations, headed up a large team, and often presented at large national and international conferences. I had a large group of friends and was, to the outside world, very ‘sociable’. I also kept in touch dutifully with my family.

However, I was grumpy around people. I was irritable if my next door neighbours wanted to ‘make friends’ (I used to think I just didn’t have time to be sociable with neighbours or members of my local community). I used to get irritated when it was that time of the week or month when I felt I ought to visit my relatives, and there were times when I just simply didn’t feel like meeting up with my friends. When I went shopping I completely ignored the people working in those shops. Also, if anyone should so much as try and start a conversation with me on a bus or train, well I was very grumpy, indeed indignant – how dare they talk with me, can’t they see I’m busy?

So there was a façade: to many I was very outwardly sociable, extrovert, and able to handle large groups of people, and present to big audiences. However, as I went about my daily life, I was actually quite introspective, introverted, and downright grumpy about having to have any human interaction. At the time I just put my grumpiness down to tiredness, and the fact that I spent so much time with people during my working days that I needed ‘time off’ from people. What I realise looking back is that my grumpiness and irritability around people was for a couple of reasons. Firstly, I was so busy all of the time I never ever gave myself time to rest properly, and I never gave myself time to reflect, or listen to myself; I would constantly over-ride my own feelings, and my relationship with myself was full of disdain, so when it came down to relationships with others I treated them with that same disdain. Secondly, I never gave myself time to do the things that I felt were important for me – whether it was booking my dental appointment or getting to the dry cleaners, as I put my needs after the needs of others. This may sound odd to think that I was putting their needs first, given I was grumpy and antisocial when I was with them, but I realised I was like that because I was raised with the belief that I had to be good, and part of that was making myself available to others, so my relationships at that time were based on duty, ‘ought to’s’ and ‘should haves’, and not on simply enjoying another’s company.

During the last eight years in which I have been consistently inspired by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, something changed within me in regards to how I interact with the outside world. Serge presented the importance of taking care of self, and shared this in very practical ways. I also observed Serge and Universal Medicine practitioners take time to rest and to self-care, which was deeply inspiring.

I am now (a work in progress) developing a much deeper relationship with myself, getting to know myself, if you will. I have realised that in the past I simply didn’t give myself enough time in the day to rest, pause, or ponder. I also realised that I had never put my own self-care first, in part because of my beliefs in being a ‘good girl’. So, over a few years I experimented with allowing myself more time during each day for moments to rest, or ponder. This felt really supportive and increased my levels of vitality, not only to do what was needed during my day, but to engage with others too. I also experimented with self-care, starting with the little things, like booking my dental appointments and committing to them, and allowing myself the time to go to the dry cleaners, or the tailors, or the shoe repair shop; and giving myself time to do the things that supported me each week – such as food shopping. As basic as these were, I noticed a change in myself fairly quickly. These things were very important to me, and they meant that my working week ran smoothly, and that I felt much more prepared for the week. In allowing myself the time to do these simple things, over time I gradually noticed that I felt less hassled, less grumpy, and more open to talking with people in my daily life, as well as being more lighthearted with my friends and family.

From this, my life has changed tenfold as regards my relationships with the outside world… to the degree that when I am at work in a large hospital I love talking with everyone I meet, I love sharing moments with people by the water cooler, and I love connecting with people on trains and buses. My relationship with my family is different, particularly my mother – I adore seeing her, spending time with her, and no longer feel the grumpiness I used to… or that sense of obligation that I ought to see her. As for my neighbours; well, for the first time in my life I actually attended a street party (for the Queen’s Jubilee celebrations in May 2012) and sat down with all of my neighbours, which was absolutely unheard of for me – in all the years I have had neighbours I have never ever done that. My shopping trips are very different now as I like to talk with the shop assistants, engage with the people working on the cash desks, talk with the teller at the bank, and I have so much more fun when I am out and about.

What am I saying here? Before I met Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine the social world was a drag for me, and I found it quite stressful needing to interact with anyone over and above a few of my friends or work colleagues… I would purposefully isolate myself. But now, since I have learned to deepen my relationship with myself by taking time to rest, and time to take care of me and my daily needs, I absolutely love being with people and meeting people. It makes my day. These days I couldn’t imagine a day without human interaction in the way it is for me now. I have come to this place because of the inspiration I found by meeting Serge Benhayon and other Universal Medicine Practitioners, and for that I am grateful. I simply love people…

666 thoughts on “My Relationship With the World – I Simply Love People

  1. So much of the world will relate to the likes of: ‘how dare they talk with me, can’t they see I’m busy?’ When we run on empty, we are effectively empty, with nothing to give. When we bring it back to nurturing and caring for ourselves as our very foundation of how we treat ourselves, there is a fullness that cannot but overflow onto others.

  2. What a simple and life-changing formula – taking the time to love and care for yourself = exponentially better relationships with every single person in your life. What if instead of blaming or ending our relationships we tried this first?

    1. I love how when we give ourselves permission to truly take care of ourselves, the ripple effect is huge, in that we then feel so much more able to connect with and offer care and support to others.

  3. So great what you have shared and expressed here and something I can completely relate with. Being ‘nice’ or ‘good’ simply does not serve either ourselves or others and the examples you gave of looking after yourself as so simple and really practical. I, like you, love people however over the last few weeks this has been really noticeable for me in how I am there for others but not for me, I do not give myself time to deeply rest or reflect but feel this is starting to change now and it feels good.

  4. When we take the time to care for and love our self, this transfers very easily to caring and loving others. It begins with our self before true care can be offered to another which you so beautifully point out in your blog Jane.

  5. The moment we put a condition on love, we put a condition on God and in so doing inhibit our access to all that is divine that lives and breathes within us.

  6. It’s beautiful how deepening our relationship with ourselves, taking more care and nurturing actually then can extend out far beyond self, as it impacts the way we are with everyone else too.

  7. Deep down we all, I have found, care for other human beings – the only catch is that we expect and believe that they should behave this way. And when they don’t we get hurt. So if this vicious cycles going on, what will make a change? Surely someone has to be the one to show an open heart and go the loving way. Knowing life we will all get a chance to put this into practice today – thank you Jane.

  8. When we focus on tasks and things – people inevitably get in the way. It’s like they’re trying to say ‘hey you’ve got it around the wrong way!’. Make people and love your goal and you will find that life will flow. Thank you Jane.

  9. I have been bringing more of my connections with others to the fore as opposed to getting on with what I need to get done as quickly as possible. Your day feels completely different if you make it all about the people and connecting with them, and its what we are all wanting after real relationships.

  10. Valuing who we are not only gives us the space to support ourselves but also allows us the time to discover, explore and listen to our bodies and what our next moves will be. Whether that is to rest, what to eat or going for a walk, our bodies are always communicating and we take the space to listen and value it’s sharing’s it’s amazing how the world also opens up to us.

  11. Since also hearing about the importance of taking care of self and resting when needed, I am now much more willing to listen to my body’s rhythm and make more nurturing choices to give my body the best chance to recuperate and to feel refreshed and ready for the day ahead.

  12. The correlation between self-care and to being open and to connecting to others I can really relate to. Before taking care of and appreciating myself through the inspiration and loving support of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine I was shy, nervous and reserved with others, particularly with people I did not know. Now I find it a great joy to speak with anyone and everyone when possible.

  13. The correlation between self-care and to being open and to connecting to others I can really relate to. Before taking care of and appreciating myself through the inspiration and loving support of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, I was shy, nervous and reserved with others, particularly with people I did not know. Now that I am not reserved with myself, I find it a great joy to speak with anyone and everyone when possible.

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