by Gina, Brisbane, Australia
Often self-help workshops can be perceived as being money-spinners. Well, recently, for $5, I attended a presentation about Women’s health. It explored how women’s often punishing schedules, juggling a myriad of roles including carer, mother, partner, employer or employee, are affecting their overall health and well-being. The presentation proposed the consideration to self-nurture and self-love as a possible means to address vitality, energy levels, and feelings of overwhelm.
The example given was to consider how much time we spend getting ourselves ready in the morning. I realised I got dressed, cleaned my teeth then brushed my hair whilst my car was warming up and the garage door was being opened. At the same time, I had been having huge issues with getting my 3 1/2 year old daughter dressed; she refused to do it herself or let someone help her. Recently, we’d been leaving the house with her in her pyjamas because it all just got too hard.
So I endeavoured in a gentle, no-expectations way, to get up earlier and shower and dress before starting to get breakfast and lunches under way. I would make sure my breakfast was ready with the children (and not gulped down 5 mins before I was leaving) – so I was fully dressed spending time with my kids – who had cooked the breakfast whilst I was finishing getting ready.
After a few days, I realised my daughter had instigated and dressed herself each morning of that week. WOW! I could instantly feel the responsibility we have to show our children that by loving ourselves we in turn teach them personal responsibility and love towards themselves. They may have heard me many times speak with hollow words – “loving yourself is the most important thing” – but in that week they got to feel it for the first time and you could feel the increase in fun and joy in the home as a result.
A few weeks later we moved home. Our move was split over two days. On the first day, I got up and believed that because there was so much to be done there was not any time for a shower or any part of my new self-nurturing morning routine. So I put on some old, daggy appropriate ‘moving’ clothes and started my day. By 7am, I felt overwhelmed and had shouted at each member of my family for being lazy louts. My husband and I went about the day with very little dialogue and communication as a result of my rudeness. The next morning, I got up and this time paused before I launched into the day. Maybe I do have time for myself – so I showered, blow-dried my hair and dressed in clothes that were practical but still made me feel nice about myself. The day ran smoothly and we even had fun and a few laughs as we engaged with each other in our new home.
The presentation I was referring to above, that has supported me to connect to experiencing what I am sharing in this article, was delivered by Natalie Benhayon from Universal Medicine. I’ve attended quite a few events over the last four years. I could write much more about the benefits and support I have gained from attending these events but have chosen on this occasion to describe just one of them, because in its simplicity it encapsulates what Universal Medicine offers. For $5, I got to understand and feel how to embark on working with a self-esteem issue I’d previously paid psychologists high fees for, with little outcome.
The practical tools offered by Universal Medicine have supported me to discover for myself a way of living; to be able to manage and enjoy the busy lives we all have, and a chance to help me cope with and understand all the pain and hurt I see in other people’s lives and world events. The example I have described shows the essence of what Universal Medicine shares with us – by taking more consideration of ourselves and care to look after ourselves, we then invite the opportunity of bringing more love into our lives, which is shared and felt by those around us.
I am understanding as each day goes by, the more I am dedicated to loving myself, and making self-loving choices, the less drama there is in my life, the more flow there is in my life, the more joy my children express with and the calmer my husband is. I am experiencing the more loving I am with myself, the expression of all of those around me is also more loving.
This is never perfect for me, but just as I was able to reflect on what happened when I forgot to look after myself on the day of my move, each day I now reflect on how my treatment of myself has influenced the day’s events.
Thank you to Universal Medicine for sharing with me the simple science, that by my committing to bring self-love into my morning, my love-tank is filled and love is then what I have to offer to the day, and to all those with whom I share it.
379 thoughts on “Self-Love and Inspiring Love in Another”
Love it Gina. Your practical example of implementing the practical tools from Universal Medicine demonstrates how practical and effective they are.
Taking a moment to pause first before jumping into anything gives me an opportunity to feel how do I feel to do this, what do I need and how to keep it simple. I experienced this today, I was busy and starting to get overwhelmed so I went on my lunch break and when I came back I got more done in an hour than I had done in hours because I gave to myself first.
When we ‘forget’ to look after ourselves there can be a big fall out that not only affects us, but can have a significant ripple effect on others too.
Wow how amazing your daughter was so inspired by your reflection. It shows how simple it is to inspire another when we live it ourselves first.
It is very beautiful and simple how we can inspire another, no words needed.
Yesterday someone was asking why so many people are feeling ill these days. We seem to have difficulties just living life and this text shows that there is a simple way and a simple answer but it takes some courage perhaps but more so honesty to really look at what it is we do on a regular basis that might contribute in us feeling good or not so good. .
There are things that are priceless if we dare to go there.
Great to read this again Gina, I’ve recently been through a challenging period and noticed on some days I didn’t dress myself with the level care I normally take, and it felt like those days were in a kind of slump. It is amazing the quality of energy self care and self love brings to the whole day from simple everyday activities like how we dress ourselves.
Thank you Gina, with reference to your daughter’s turnaround, it’s amazing how much is truly communicated by living love rather than when we speak about love but don’t live it. We can never underestimate what our livingness communicates and inspires in another. It reminds me of the simplicity of how powerful our being is, as opposed to anything we can do.
There are many women feeling the pressure of life, overwhelmed and unable to cope and what seems common is we blame the circumstances and people around us, and a ‘change’ made from that place often takes us to another familiar situation of the same quality and we end up feeling there is nothing we can do. We cannot remind ourselves often enough to self-love and self-care as women, and those gatherings where we can be honest and be inspired by others and support each other are very much needed.
The simplicity of responsibility is here shown. Responsibility is really not the huge weight that we have been led to believe. It is what is shared here.
It is true that when we start to love ourselves we also feel more loving towards others.
Yes, we build a foundation of love for self, and it naturally emanates.
It is very true that children learn more from our actions, movements and how we are than they do from our words. And, they are always watching.
Great point Carola and just highlights our responsibility in this regard,
A very beautiful blog Gina, the love I have in my life for me, equally is shared with and for others.
“Thank you to Universal Medicine for sharing with me the simple science, that by my committing to bring self-love into my morning, my love-tank is filled and love is then what I have to offer to the day, and to all those with whom I share it”.
I am in whole-hearted agreement with you Gina – if I get caught up in the energy of rush and don’t bring the space to my personal preparation for the day – it is this quality that I bring to everyone and everything – this is totally exhausting. Self-love and self-nurturing in the morning routine brings the energy of inner joy to share with all.
To pause before we launch into our days … simple, and so effective and something we often overlook. When we take that time, to love us first we are then more willing to see the love around us and allow it and we can love others. It’s that simple and something we can all do in every moment, and yes when we muck up, we just simply get back on our ‘love horse’.
Beautifully said Monica. It is quiet empowering to take a moment (even) to simply honor ourselves, as the next move we make is one with greater power, greater connection, and greater presence.
When we disregard ourselves we will always disregard others, this is unavoidable because it is simply how we live with ourselves. Such simple choices can make a huge difference to the quality we feel on the inside, which then allows us to handle life around us.
The cost of attending presentations by Universal Medicine and Esoteric Women’s Health has always seem extremely reasonable to me. No one could surely think that $5 for a presentation on being a woman in the world today is unreasonable!
I’ve previously spent $1000’s on workshops, presentations, sessions and books but my life didn’t change. Not only are Universal Medicine and Esoteric Women’s Health presentations reasonably priced they are truly life changing.
I love the reflection that was offered from the toddler in this story, as it shows how disruptive our behaviour can be and affects everyone in the house.
I wonder if the behaviour we see coming from our children is a reflection to us of what we are not doing for ourselves? Your daughter was, perhaps, saying in her way that she was not going to get dressed in the energy you were offering in the morning. It was rush rush rush and she wasn’t having a bar of it! I found with my kids that my timing was not their timing and if I actually created more space in the morning by being more organised with my own self care then magic happened for us all.
When we live from self-love and look after ourselves and the needs of our body, our life changes dramatically and that change is there for all to see by way of reflection, allowing others to feel how important self-love is and to make similar choices if they feel inspired to do so, often our actions are more powerful than words.
Natalie Benhayon has presented and passed on much wisdom, which many of us have benefited from, and shared with family and friends, I agree that when we care and nurture ourselves our lives have a greater flow and ease about them.
So often we run around helping others and never stop to consider ourselves, no wonder so many people are exhausted and craving stimulants just to get through the day. Your sharing around committing to a more loving routine in the morning and how supportive it was for not only you but your whole family it a great reminder to fill our ‘love tank’ and how this choice brings a quality and flow to our day that supports everyone.
“they got to feel it for the first time and you could feel the increase in fun and joy in the home as a result.” A beautiful foundation for all the family settling into their new home.
Gina what a beautiful example of how a true relationship to ourselves can change the world around us.
There is nothing like putting teachings into practice to see what happens and to be able to appreciate the quality of what was delivered. This and only this permits a proper assessment of the teachings. And, let’s face it, some do nothing for us. Others a bit. Others do but have a downside. Yet, Universal Medicine’s always work.
Thank you Gina for a simply beautiful blog about choosing loving care for ourselves each morning as we prepare for the day and the effects of our love on each other and our days events.
Just imagine if this was taught to each of us when young, to love ourselves, and the knock on effect this has, what a different world we would live in.
I absolutely love this blog. We would never go for a car journey without petrol – it’s impossible, so why would we begin our day without checking our love-tank is full. It’s our responsibility to ensure it’s full and we’re ready to go at the beginning of the day.
So true Meg and I love this analogy with the car! Always a reflection of how we treat our bodies.
The process of self love and rebuilding this into our lives is a very beautiful and endlessly worthwhile one to embrace and celebrate each step along the way. It is interesting how self love which is to deeply honour and give back to ourselves the love and care we are within has been seen as something bad and to be avoided. We have to put another before ourselves is the common misconception. But we must put ourselves equally first. The thing we often don’t realise is that by not valuing ourselves we are in fact bringing a lesser quality than we may realise to another.
Absolutely Joshua, a great point, ‘The thing we often don’t realise is that by not valuing ourselves we are in fact bringing a lesser quality than we may realise to another.’
“By taking more consideration of ourselves and care to look after ourselves, we then invite the opportunity of bringing more love into our lives, which is shared and felt by those around us” – this is a great reminder, thank you, Gina. So simple. When we look after ourselves, we are ultimately looking after everyone else.
It is the greatest responsibility to be who you are and inspire others to be the same.
I remember as a child feeling held back from doing my ‘fair share’ in household routines and duties, namely because someone else in the household carried it all as a burden that I realised in later years, was almost impenetrable to pierce through…
We can be so identified as women, with playing such a role of ‘carrying everything’ – how truly supportive to have the presentations as you’ve described here Gina (and I have also attended many…) that in the simplest of ways, offer powerful opportunities for us to wake up out of ways that haven’t served us, nor those around us, whatsoever.
It’s all too easy, isn’t it, for the woman trying to hold it all together, to actually neglect herself, and then experience (and likely express…) extreme frustration with those around her for not playing their part and seemingly adding to her load…
And therein is the key as you’ve shared here essentially Gina – what if the ‘load’ we’ve taken on isn’t ‘it’? What if coming back to a steady rhythm and way with ourselves is the true support everyone around us needs?
I notice that when I am in that running momentum in the morning and don’t put the care that I deserve into my day then I run my whole day in that. If I stop and put care into how I prepare for my day, it holds me and sustains me or has a point for me to come back to in my day.
Presentations like this give new meaning to ‘days off’ as every day is a day on and there is no off. I enjoy what this article is bringing in the way that no matter what the day has as a heading, every moment is a moment to take care of yourself. We can say this and possibly we do do this but when the pressure is on and the list has a thousand things on it do we really put this theory on the ground. We can also see how we are all role models from how we are, so no ‘time off’ to just get this done or justification around what the day holds it’s all on and everyone is watching. Good practice to the old ‘behind closed doors’ chestnut as well where we think just because we are in our own 4 walls anything goes. Children reflect to us how we are and not necessarily what we say, a great lesson for us all even though I have heard it a thousand times.
‘each day I now reflect on how my treatment of myself has influenced the day’s events’. feels a very powerful practice to reflect on the events of our day and to feel that everything that happened we created on some level as a direct result of choosing self-love or self-neglect/self abuse.
“I could instantly feel the responsibility we have to show our children that by loving ourselves we in turn teach them personal responsibility and love towards themselves.” Absolutely so Gina and not only are we showing our children what responsibility and self love looks like but they to get to observe us and how we feel and explore it for themselves. A perfect reflection of responsibility and the choice to make it so. Thank you Gina.
What you present here is a beautiful example of the effect that self care has on our days, and the relationship we have with ourselves and others.
Life changing wisdom shared for $5. Bargain! It goes to show Gina the most insightful and supportive real life learning’s don’t have to have an expensive price-tag along with them.
Great blog Gina, with a beautiful example of responsibility and self love. So gorgeous that you taught and reflected to your daughter by your livingness, thank you;
“WOW! I could instantly feel the responsibility we have to show our children that by loving ourselves we in turn teach them personal responsibility and love towards themselves.
Goodness how simple is that – making sure your love tank is full so you have that to offer to yourself and others. I can totally see how this would affect your day and how you spoke and behaved with other people.
Today is a day like any other and depending on your routine or schedule something like this happens: you wake, you get dressed or shower, have some breakfast, interact with children, partner or flatmates, pack some lunch, clean your teeth and leave. There will be some minor changes for each day depending on your schedule as I said, but do you ever wonder what life is all about? I mean do you ever wake and wonder why you are doing what you are doing? How many times can we do the same thing over and over without at some point feeling there is more? I sit often and wonder, am I just here to wake up every day and do the same or similar things and then just die at some point down the track having had a good or great life. I mean it doesn’t seem to make sense at all to me at this point.
What this article is asking is quality, in other words, we are going to do the same or similar thing over and over and as there is always a quality to it first, what is the quality? What are our thoughts when we wake, are they light and bright or are they heavy and dull? Do we drag ourselves out of bed on work days only to find on days off we can’t sleep? If nothing makes sense start to challenge why and the world will start to open up. What I have found the more you challenge the norm in you the more that opens. In other words, it’s an ongoing relationship that never ends, you just keep waking up ready to embrace whatever is in front of your face.
The title alone says it all. We don’t need war, conflict or fighting to change the world. We simply need to live love.
I had a session with a Esoteric Practitioner once who shared with me about regard and how gorgeous it is to challenge yourself each day to how much MORE regard you can take with yourself. I loved the idea, it made taking care of myself seem like fun and a never ending depth of love I can bring to myself and all I do.
Reading your experience has confirmed how much selfcare not only supports myself but supports others too. When we truly care for ourselves we inspire others to care for themselves too no matter how young or old.
Recently, I mirrored your experience, I had a day of decorating, moving furniture and general household chores to do and felt to skip self-care this one morning because there was so much to get on with and ‘I told myself skipping self-care was OK as I needed to get everything done’. The knock on effect though was huge, I felt dreadful by about 10 am and was surprised when I looked in the mirror and this is what I got reflected back. I had not appreciated how much self-care supported me and its importance regardless of what I have planned for the day; I might wear different clothes but the care I take to choose those clothes and put them on need not change.
I love the ‘love tank’ comment – so true. The other thing that really struck me in this blog is how when we express ourselves without any lived essence in our words, they are empty, no one really gets what we are saying and we are just living in our heads. But, when we speak from the livingness of our experience, our words are embodied and carry an energetic foundation that can be felt by everyone and real communication takes place. Understanding this has helped me see that there were certain subjects I really struggled to grasp at school, but this is because the presentation of them was purely mental, without the embodied livingness of them to support the expression – and so, didn’t have the energy to connect with. True communication is really a beautiful thing.
With out care for ourselves how can we show it to or hold others in it? Everything we experience on the outside starts with ourselves on the inside. Beautiful examples of reflection Gina.
That’s just one of the pieces of Wisdom I have also been offered by courses and workshops presented by Universal Medicine. It is constantly delivering simple, practical ways to live with love and self care that have transformed my life and the way I approach this beautiful world we live in.
Universal Medicine has always presented gold to us on how to simple make loving choices that truly work, such as this -‘by taking more consideration of ourselves and care to look after ourselves, we then invite the opportunity of bringing more love into our lives, which is shared and felt by those around us.’ A win/win that benefits us all.
Thank you Gina for sharing your experiences, it is amazing how different your day went when you took the time to take self loving care of yourself and the flow on effect to your family members compared to the day before. Such simple tools we are given but so powerful in changing lives.