There is a beautifully written article on the Women in Livingness blog, by Kyla Plummer – (Sex, Drugs and Making Love). She is awesomely honest and open about her experiences of sex, drugs and making love (the only part left out was rock-n’-roll)!
In that written piece I came across a line that spoke back very strongly and clearly to me. I realised that I was, or rather that I still am at times, one of those many, to borrow Kyla’s words … “who have experienced similar things – craving love, touch, appreciation, connection – and not knowing my own self-worth”.
It was this ‘self-worth’ in particular that kept echoing through my head, heart and soul. Although the English Dictionary describes this double-barrelled word as a noun, I would say it is a verb too. Re-learning to self-worth has been a huge piece of my work and it is still in progress. Infinitely inspired initially by Serge Benhayon, and later Simone Benhayon, it started however, with (at least) a possibility, if not the deep inner knowing, that I was worthy of love like no other (note: not that I am different to others, but that the love for self comes first). This made me aware how I used to think that I should accept and settle down with what I thought I deserved – read: NOT much and certainly NOT love. I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!
Esoteric Women’s Presentations and Esoteric Women’s Developers Groups, with Natalie Benhayon and Sara Williams, have inspired me to explore the power of deepening my relationship and love for self; to such a level that I would (at least) want to do anything that I knew would make this connection heartfelt, and to say NO to what does not belong to my newly re-discovered true self-regard milieu.
I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth. I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.
Thank you Serge Benhayon, Simone Benhayon, Natalie Benhayon and Sara Williams from the depths of that amazing muscle organ which pumps blood throughout the body.
By Dragana Brown, London, UK
The Truth about Universal Medicine 
This is so gorgeous, ‘The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.’
Dragana I can so relate to what you are sharing with us all
Re-learning to self-worth has been a huge piece of my work and it is still in progress. .’
As I uncovered yet another part of my self-worth issues that I did not have any awareness of. There is always something new to learn and understand why we behave in the ways we do, that affects not just ourselves but how we relate to all others and the world we live in.
When I read the words ‘I am Love already’ I can feel an expansive boom inside my body. Something so much more than self-worth, a wordless expansion, an intelligence that knows no bounds. We are all that and more, so, so, so much more. We are the absolute limitlessness of God.
“Saying “NO” to what doesn’t feel true and loving in life” is not nearly as easy as it sounds. For a start, most of us have a very warped concept of what love is. We think it’s about gestures and proclamation and so sure we’d know to turn down someone who was treating us ‘badly’ but if someone was giving us heaps of attention and treating us really well but purely out of need then most of us would be swept off our feet by this elaborate gesture of ‘love’. Sure deep down we all do know what true love is but we’ve been without its activity for such a long time that it’s a long-forgotten memory.
Alexis you say
‘Sure deep down we all do know what true love is but we’ve been without its activity for such a long time that it’s a long-forgotten memory.”
This is what I so appreciate about Serge Benhayon and the Ageless Wisdom teachings that he has reawakened humanity to what it is to love and value ourselves again. That there is a way to return back to the sensitivity we all knew and had as children and let that be our guide is one such gift that has been given back to the world.
Making life about a ‘fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in’. Beautifull. More and more life for me is about that along with true purpose.
True purpose brings with it ‘fulfilment and contentment from the inside out’. It is a really wonderful feeling and one that I am currently incubating across all of my environments. I am coming to know that being a funnel for God is the true purpose of us all and to the best of my ability I am actively being the best funnel that I can be as much of the time as possible. All of the refining that I do, I do in order to make myself a more effective funnel.
Seeking from ‘outside in’ is simply a trap that keeps us seeking on and on and on….
Learning to honour, respect and love yourself brings an equal honouring, respect and love for others.
As well as being an awesome reflection for other people.
Yes, I know that craving for connection, touch, warmth, tenderness, appreciation and love from others. Is there any wonder that I get disappointed when I look around and don’t find the love that I crave and that only I uniquely know? It really is impossible to find it from another, because only we know the unique way that we need to love ourselves moment by moment. We are ‘worthy of a love like no other’ as you say.
Time and time when I try to get it from another, then it is a fall on your face fail. In my experience I can’t say to myself ‘I love, I love you, I love you.’ over and over again until it goes in. The ‘I love you’ cannot just be words I say to myself, there has to be an activity of self-worth; like a verb, as you say.
I agree with you Simone saying I love you over and over again like a mantra does nothing if we do not love ourselves first. If we take a moment to stop and look around us we can easily see that we are not in love with ourselves because we are very abusive towards ourselves and each other. Interestingly growing up with parents that were Roman Catholics it is now easy to see where some of this abuse comes from. As it was instilled in me and my siblings that we took care of others first and not ourselves. To take care of ourselves was considered to be a selfish act and one that was frowned upon by God. This I later discovered is the complete opposite to what God would want, God would want us to take care of ourselves first, so that caring way was felt by all others which would give them at last a choice of whether they wanted to care for themselves or not. If there is no reflection of a different way to be, then nothing can change. Thankfully in this lifetime Serge Benhayon through the ageless wisdom teachings is reflecting a different way to live and the world is responding.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth” – this is so delicious.
As we deepen our love for self, the more this is confirmed, ‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.’
“This made me aware how I used to think that I should accept and settle down with what I thought I deserved”. It’s that point of what we have accepted that we can look at to see here new levels of love are able to be introduced and lived. Reading this line I became aware of how much religion has impacted me to feel I’m not worthy and to accept less, which is exactly the opposite of God and what love is.
The whole ‘deserving’ of God’s love is a set up from the very beginning because God’s love is already who we are so the very notion of having to deserve it in order to receive it is a totally false one.
I have been so caught up in this illusion that I have to work very hard to get God to even look my way, let alone that I deserve God’s Love, that didn’t even come into it. When I feel into the illusion I have spun for myself like a web that has encapsulated me and held me fast, it feels very old and to be honest has the reek of Catholicism all over it. The damage religious groups have done to vilify the true name of God, it’s no wonder many people are put off by the very word God.
Who is it that thinks they have to behave a certain way to be deserving of God’s love? God that’s who, an aspect of God that has temporarily forgotten that God is who He is already.
Very timely to read this article as the Love quotient from heaven feels like it has deepened! So as you have shared Dragana, we are able to be much more appreciative of the depth of Love avaiable now so we can stop resisting an advance that is so Loving being offered from heaven by our equal brothers.
We allow so many things that are not okay simply because we don’t feel worthy of it. This is not said in a pitiful way, but simply through a realisation that I live my life convinced that the way things are is the best I can get, yet not trying differently, giving something else a go and seeing how that works out for me. For instance, we could be driving a very old car that is on the verge of breaking down, yet not exploring any options of getting another car. We can trot around in our current car, in fear that it may give up on us any minute and stay stuck in that worry for years, or simply speak to a friend, look online or visit a car dealership to understand what is on the market and what our options are. But many of us women have settled for a way of life that is way, way below what any loving standard would be. So when we get anything that is just a bit better than what we have said yes to, we grasp it with both hands, toe and fingernails without a second thought, without discernment or even a question of whether we deserve more. How many breaks are we putting on ourselves? How many ways are we keeping ourselves trapped and in an endless escape-less circle…
viktoriastoykova you have openly shared what happens to so many men and women who live a lesser life and hate every minute of it but seem power-less to change the way they are living and so keep themselves trapped in an endless circle. I was having just this conversation with a friend of mine who feels at the age of 70 years of age, that they are missing out on so many things in life and want to change but do not know how to, because they seem unable to leave the comfortable rut they are living in. If they leave the rut, then what? It feels like a very scary process for them. This is exactly where we get trapped by our spirit that keeps us in the drudgery of life. We hate it, but what would happen if we left it behind by making different choices?
‘I now know that slowly, but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfilment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.’ Years ago had I read this line I would have thought it impossible and that the person who wrote it was probably crazy but now having connected to the love the author is talking about I can feel the truth in these words.
Coming out of a deep lack of self-worth I can now see how debilitating it is and such a waste of time and can understand where the self-deprecating thoughts come from.
Julie Matson so totally agree with you when you say
“Coming out of a deep lack of self-worth I can now see how debilitating it is and such a waste of time and can understand where the self-deprecating thoughts come from.”
Again we come back to we think we think and that the thoughts we have belong to us because we are having those thoughts. To understand that we do not think at all but are picking up thoughts from a pool of consciousness that is passing through us, is the first step, I feel, in reclaiming ourselves. Then when we can allow ourselves to read energy coming through ourselves and others this to me is freedom because you see the energy at play first and not the person. So we can depersonalise life and just read the energy. We can all do this and it is fascinating. Who wants to watch television or the movies when you can watch energy at play and the tricks it gets up too, being completely exposed and the spirit hates being exposed as the master behind everything we do and say.
Lack of self-worth is very debilitating, which is why building a love for self is so important.
When we have low self-worth we easily feel hurt and react because it causes us to disconnect from love and truth, therefore, we are more likely to create complications and potentially hurt others too. Re-learning to self-love is then hugely important in so many ways.
Yes, supporting people to say no empowers them to live a more full and true life. Remembering how I used to say yes to too many things and then go into overwhelm. There was no regard for the quality I did things in back then.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” This is beautiful – and so true. Accepting and appreciating myself – an ongoing journey.
Not knowing my self-worth was deeply debilitating, capping me on all levels of life; from every decision, I took, to every conversation and interaction. It was like walking around in a prison cage of my own making. Thank heavens for Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine who supported me to know my true self and as a result know my worth deeply so.
There is no doubt about it Serge Benhayon is the game changer when it comes to living life. All the answers to life are given, all we have to do is respond and our lives will change. How do I know this? Because 25 + years of psychology changed nothing. Listen to Serge Benhayon and discern for yourself what is being said and your life will change it has to. We are led to believe life is static, but this cannot be true because the universe is constantly expanding and this planet is part of the universe and so is part of the expansion.
Having a life-long love affair with yourself is one of the best love affairs you can have. No need for a partner, no online dating….just you and your self (and God actually) re-learning to love you and all of you. THEN when you meet (or have a partner) you are bringing that love to them, not asking to be loved.
Sarah Flenley I adore what you have written
“Having a life-long love affair with yourself is one of the best love affairs you can have. No need for a partner, no online dating….just you and your self (and God actually) re-learning to love you and all of you. THEN when you meet (or have a partner) you are bringing that love to them, not asking to be loved.”
This is the cure to life’s ills reconnecting back to the love of God and the universe. What more could anyone want?
Absolutely, ‘Having a life-long love affair with yourself is one of the best love affairs you can have’.
‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.’ Such a big realization is that. It changes everything, the need for being loved melts and opens up a new way of being that is very natural. It’s how we always were as little girls and boys, there was no doubt about our worth, we simply felt amazing. So returning to this aliveness and deep knowing of who we really are makes complete sense.
Shirley-Ann thank you for your comment, you could have been describing my life, I am in a kind of transition period observing all the needs, attachments, pictures and hurts I’ve had about love and not receiving it, to making steps to live the love I am.
It’s a beautiful thing to realise that our self worth is something we completely decide on for ourselves and that comes from the choices and decisions we make everyday and whether or not they reflect the value we hold ourselves in and the love we have for ourselves. It’s very empowering to realise this.
Melinda I can relate to what you are saying, do we value ourselves and I would say not and that set us up to look outside of ourselves to be recognised and valued. When we come to the realisation that we can actually empower ourselves that all the negativity we have absorbed from others does not belong to us in truth then we can set ourselves free by knowing we have a worth a value which is beyond gold and that is the empowering moment. That all those barbs that we swallowed about being worthless as children were untrue.
Understanding and then knowing our own worth is fundamental to our sense of self and sense of well-being. This is especially important when what happens around us is designed to ‘pull the rug out from underneath us’, so to speak. It is also important when we slip up. As human beings it is inevitable that we will make mistakes, after all the aim of life is not perfection, it is about knowing and living who we are no matter what. That takes a solid knowing in our own worth. It also supports others to know theirs.
Thank you Jennifer for your comment, especially appreciated this line “As human beings it is inevitable that we will make mistakes, after all the aim of life is not perfection, it is about knowing and living who we are no matter what.” This certainly takes the focus away from what we do back to who we are, thank you.
We will and do make mistakes as human beings, we then have the opportunity to learn and grow from these mistakes. ‘As human beings it is inevitable that we will make mistakes, after all the aim of life is not perfection, it is about knowing and living who we are no matter what.’ Very much so Jennifer.
We can undermine our own self-worth in many ways. Being willing to see this as well as deepening our own self-care. This in and of itself is great to re-establish our self-worth.
Thank you, Dragana. Every reminder that the foundation of worth we have for ourselves, informs everything else in life is absolute gold, and I am inspired to work through any lack of deservedness I still harbour.
It is easy to live in the anxiousness of life and lack of self worth, yet when we decide to rediscover our self worth we find that it simply comes from an inner knowing a reawakening of our essence within.
Today’s society is plagued by those living with lack of self-worth and as a by-product our health services are bulging at the seams, many compensate lack of self worth with over-eating, checking out in front of the T.V. etc. Living a life that truly doesn’t represent who they are, and when we realise that, as a first step making a choice to appreciate ourselves and others, rather than criticise we start to feel better about ourselves.
That’s very true Sally, many people don’t feel they are even worth the time to prepare a nutritious meal, dress warmly, exercise, or have loving relationships, which can all add up to pressure and stress on the body and health conditions.
Sally what you are presenting makes sense and this to me is where the presentations of Serge Benhayon come in because he is very confirming with everyone that they are love and that we all deserve true love first, not the emotional or soppy love we have replaced true love with and why we are then so lacking in self worth. If we cannot fully embrace and love ourselves first it is impossible to love another or others.
Re-building true self-worth and value gives us a foundation from which to grow and be the love we truly are.
To learn self-worth is one of the most profound things we can build in our lives, not from a place of weakness seeking to achieve an enlightened or a higher place, but from a place of strength and knowing, like you say Dragana, that we are worth this unconditional universal love.
In society today we really do not affirm our own or others worth nearly enough.
How have we forgotten that our whole body, its mechanism is the heart and that this simply is our love engine, showing us symbolically that when we do not express our love, our heart will feel the impact of this? And all organs connected that keep the body in its homeostasis. So have we used our true intelligence? is then the next question.
Before understanding and deepening my connection with the word self worth I would have said that the word had very little significance for me but once I started to explore it, looked at how I talked to myself, questioned whether I truly valued myself and love myself enough to be gentle and caring, the more I was able to observe how little self worth I really had. I love what you bring here Dragana and how much each of us needs to explore the word Self worth and what it means to us.
Yes, Dragana, I have recently also found this to be true – ‘The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth’. It feels like love begets more love, and there is no end to it, so the more I cherish myself and my body, the more love there is pouring through for me and for everyone.
Very beautiful, ‘the more I cherish myself and my body, the more love there is pouring through for me and for everyone.’
How can you have a self-worth issue when your whole body and inner essence are made to be Gods vessel? Answer: You have to create it. So therefore one of the keys to dealing with self-worth is to see that you do not, have not and never will in truth have any issue with self worth as the issue is not who you truly are.
It’s quite incredible to peel back the layers we have imposed on ourselves so that we believe we have a lack of self-worth. I have seen this with friends and colleagues over the years and when these layers are imposed there is nothing anyone can say to change these well cemented ideals. Like we can’t talk ourselves out of the additions such a alcohol or drug, lack of self-worth really is no different.
This is true Joshua, I’ve felt it for myself, there is no self worth in the soul, it’s just pure love. Self worth is an energy we have to bring in from outside of ourselves and live with, as it’s not a natural part of who we truly are.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.”
If we take a step towards self-love, it is amazing what we see that is there for us. It is up to us to take that step though.
Yes, Sarah, no-one can make us love ourselves…this is a relationship that we have to heal and embrace wholeheartedly, and when we do our bodies become a vehicle of endlessly deepening love.
Now that’s an Endless Love that I could sign up for…
Self-love activates the love and life within us. And as we become more of that love and more of that life then life gets more and more amazing until it borders on stupendous. Yet having said that I am certain that it transgresses stupendous and enters the realm of being completely and utterly indescribable.
It’s a huge thing to develop our relationship to ourselves and feel how we treat ourselves. Often we have a standard so low for how we think about, speak to, and treat ourselves that we definitely wouldn’t accept it from another. Yet we can hurt and abuse ourselves as a kind of daily norm, so it’s great to explore this and consider that we can let all that go and simply return to self love.
We go through life settling and accepting less than what we feel is true, so as adults it takes time to rebuild this worth and to learn to appreciate ourselves for who we are and not what we do.
I hear you Dragana and what I have come to realise is that there are many layers and subtle ones at that which keep popping up and a deeper letting go is required. When I do, the knowing and claiming of Love that is available to us all equally just gets stronger and stronger
When I read this I was contemplating what it means for me as a man to have self worth and if I had any issues with it. Thanks for instigating that Dragana.
Without self-worth, we are only functioning at best, and there is no end of situations that we will say yes to without an ounce of realisation as to why we have said yes. Many years ago Serge Benhayon presented to me to build self-worth to the bone, and I am still working on this.
We are worth every millisecond of love and care (still learning that one) and everyone else reaps the benefits.
My life and my purpose in life changed for the greater when I discovered that a ‘lifelong love affair’ with my Soul is not only possible but is what truly defines all that I am and all that we are part of. Inspired deeply by The Ageless Wisdom Teachings as lived and presented by Serge Benhayon, this quality of connection is something I now choose to religiously live every day as the wonder and power of love that is there to explore is something I know and can feel is what we all deserve to live.
Never before have I seen even the word “religiously” delivered in such a true context, especially as it’s deeply felt in your words that this is exactly what you live. The meaning of religion could never be more truly felt than it is here, to live the love of our soul and God, thank you Carola.
So self-worth is not a doing or gaining but an understanding and accepting of the grandness we are. In other words claiming ourselves in full.
It is by virtue of our connection to our truth and love, where we feel that we are part of a greater whole. Where there is no such thing as division. Equally there is a depth of purity that is beyond words. As you shared above, it is wise to open up to our universe and see all its colours and dimensions, for we are from that. It is the expression of God we are from.
‘Life loves me back and it wants me to nurture myself’ – yes. When we start loving and taking deeper care of ourselves we are supported in many ways – but it’s us that has to take that first step, affirming our own sense of self worth. This is one of the greatest things I’ve learned through Universal Medicine: that taking care of myself increases my sense of self worth, which is brilliant because no one else can do this for me, and so my relationship with myself is directly dependent on my own choices: I can go as fast or as slowly as I want, no dictation, no imposition, all up to me. And no one can take that sense of self worth away: only I can either deny or dismiss, or accept and affirm it.
What if it was more selfish to not have self worth and to not self care in the sense that what are we bringing to others when we are in such a quality of lack of self worth and self care. It surely does not support others to self-care and have self worth for themselves!
And what if it can actually be an arrogance to have low self worth (at the level of our spirit) because we are stepping away from the grandness and amazingness we truly are as souls? This is said with respect to what humans experience, but highlights the underlying source of energy from the spirit to create something separate from all that we are as souls from God.
Adding worth to self without making it selfish is definitely worth-while.
Not expecting life and people to reflect my own worth actually means that it comes from how I hold and respect myself first. When I do that there can be much support from life that can flow.
To truly love yourself will actually let you realise that it is never about reward. That if someone is showing you love back, it is “only” a confirmation of the love you already lived. That then asks you instantly to move forward with this, as it is needed for everyone to see and reflect.
I wholeheartedly understand your gratitude towards everything that Serge Benhayon and his family offers and reflects. Without them, I would never be at the stage of my life that I am now. Not because they did something miraculous, but because they reflected me a different, more truthful way, that I was open to. It is still my choice what I accept and what I choose – their consistent way of love though was the best supporter ever and I am pretty sure will be forever.
What I hear from your blog Dragana is how solid your foundations are becoming in terms of self worth, love and respect. Imagine trying to build a house with no understructure or base – it simply wouldn’t work, and would likely fall down! When we don’t have a foundation of self worth this is how life can feel – uncertain, shaky and unstable.
It’s a great comment Susie, you’ve inspired me to look at areas of my life where I do fall down and found more love.
Thank you for sharing – love the way you go about how we can life in regards to living from self-worth. This way was first presented to me by Natalie Benhayon – and it was the most real thing I had ever heard. To actually self-care, self- nurture and self- love to come back to the worth we are naturally.
I have always held this belief that I did not deserve, and there is still a thread of that running as I feel this capping of myself lately, almost feeling tied down unable to move. Having been brought up a catholic, I can feel I have taken this belief on from the catholic church, time to clear this energy from my body.
I am with you Dragana, self worth is an activity or verb to describe confirming and living from who we truly are.
I love the title of the blog, as re-learning to self- worth is definitely what needs to happen. We start off in life with lots of worth, in fact it is as unquestionable as a bird’s ability to fly. We then receive messages from all directions telling us to tone it down, doubt ourselves and feel inadequate or superior to others. I find this loss is related to the loss of our connection to our body. Once we reclaim that and all it can share with us, we are well on the road back to our natural knowing of our worth.
This contentment we feel from inside nourishes us on so many levels, being content with ourselves and our bodies, being content with life and all its reflections and learnings that come to help us grow and expand, means that whatever life presents to us, we know we have everything we need to deal with it.
‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself’. This part we tend to forget.. the part that life loves us back, or put another way, life has our ‘back’, and when we are open to growing and learning, life delivers all we need.
Sometimes I have been delivered just what I needed and yet I have allowed doubt and suspicion to deny that offering. This is really a lack of commitment to life and a stubborn pride from the spirit getting in the way of a natural unfolding path. This is a delaying tactic but there is no escaping continual learning situations that support us on our way. When we honour who we are we have a clearer ability to read situations and as we build our foundation of self love and self worth we are more likely to accept what we know is true even if it does not fit a picture we might have previously held.
I get a sense of how I thought self-worth was something I needed to build, cultivate, earn, and in that I was already denying my worth. From your sharing, it feels to me that self-worth comes when we deeply connect and accept the truth of who we are.
I have craved love, connection, touch, appreciation and not knowing my own self-worth all my life. In fact, this is what was the only thing that eventually drove me. I dropped all my responsibility, especially appreciating all that I was, and chased the image of being met. I refused to meet myself. I have learnt life is just about this. You’re either appreciating in every minute all that is on offer and therefore what you offer OR you are not. You cannot think you are or earn it – you are or you are not.
Children don’t have issues with self-worth. What if living loving ourselves in full is the most natural and simple way of being? When I have an issue with my worth maybe I just have to make a stop and remember whenever I’ve felt content, solid, joyful, present and so beautiful just by being in my body. This is a choice to make in every moment, nothing exclusive for a few but for all, as we all are the same precious human beings full of love.
Most kids don’t have thoughts about who they are, they just are, whereas adults are constantly agonising about who they are, who they’re not, who they’d like to be, who they wish they weren’t and who they wish they were! And as kids tend to be much happier than adults then I reckon that there’s something for us to learn from kids. Could it be as simple as understanding that when we live life from our bodies that there is a simplicity to life that brings with it a great joy?
Dragana thanks for being so real and honest. I can relate very much in every line of what you shared. My self-talking is not always loving, but how great being aware of that to say NO to the self-judgment that has permeated my expression through almost the whole of my life. I feel very rich today for the life that I have, the ongoing process in the relationship with myself, the support and inspiration from Universal Medicine that I always receive…definitely there is so much to appreciate and celebrate from inside out.
For many, life is to be endured, and it is rare to read that someone loves life and that it is loving them back. Self-love can work miracles.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth. I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” these words speak volumes to me, today I know and feel the grandness of the offering in these words( they give me permission to be all that i am and can be ) thank you Dragana
‘Relearning to self worth’, these words are speaking loud and clear to me today, and I am getting the message.
I was worthy of love like no other…. these words resonate with me today, and a timely reminder as there is lots coming up for me on this moment.
I appreciate very much the support that sharings like this can be. We were not educated to deeply appreciate ourselves for who we really are so messages like this are very needed, to truly re-learn self-worth in our everyday living.
If it’s possible to feel worthy of love then it must be possible to feel unworthy of love and as there’s no truth in being unworthy of love then so too must there be no truth in feeling worthy of love. We ARE love, there’s nothing, however shameful or evil that we can ever do that can change this basic fact. We don’t have to ‘earn love’, it’s not a commodity that’s given to us, we are it already.
Self worth is something we have to claim back into our own hands. Whatever anyone else says it is our own inner talk that usually wins. Continually bringing our focus back to the body whether it be the quality in which we move or the way that we walk, our posture or aligning to “True Movement” or “Sacred Movement”, practising Esoteric Yoga, there are so many ways to reconnect and bring us to a deeper love and respect for ourselves.
It’s so important in life to know you are worth everything, and that every movement from when we wake up to when we put ourselves to bed either confirms and builds that worth or destroys it. Our self worth is a choice we have to make every moment.
‘Our self worth is a choice we have to make in every moment’. Profound words which I will carry with me today!
‘The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth’. I read this sentence several times, to allow the full understanding of the wisdom I feel on reading this.
‘I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.’ I love the word ‘contentment’ in this line. I don’t know why I love it so much but it oozes out a feeling of acceptance within and at the same time a willingness to move forward in our evolution
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.” This is a beautiful realisation and something to treasure and know in every moment of our life.
It is rare to meet someone who loves life in our society and it is something we can all relate to and feel inspired by. This highlights how powerful our reflection can be, we can live in a way that will inspire people, this is a responsibility we can all embrace.
Its incredible how we talk to ourselves – that we would never take that from another, and its certainly not how God would talk to us.
Building true self-worth is the key in life, for this is a foundation from which we can express in everything we do. True self-worth is also very needed as a preventative to buckle during times when we are challenged by life’s intensities.
“I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” Beautifully summed up, it is building this connection we have with inside of us that is key to living a life of true fulfilment and contentment.
I was just about to write a comment on the same quote, though I was also going to include, “I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth,” as for me realisation that the more I love myself and life, so I am loved back, which then results in the inner contentment.
‘Life wants me to nurture myself’ – this is awesome, I hadn’t thought of it like this before, but it’s true: are we waiting for the universe to show us it has our backs and is supporting us, or are we truly, deeply and totally committed to loving and supporting ourselves first, which then naturally allows in the support that is right there, waiting for us to accept it.
I was first introduced to the aspect of “self-worth” and that there is actually a way of living and being that holds this self-worth for you. This has supported me and given me a huge sense of trust that we can actually live from a deeper love that comes from within yourself.
It seems that as we love ourselves ever more deeply, at the same time, we tune ourselves in and align with the true depth of love that is our Universe.
The unending love of God that we are held in is an eternal given, whether we are open to realising this or not, this relationship remains ever-present as does our relationship with the love we are. And when we are open and willing to explore the power of this relationship as you have shared, we then are free to live the power of love, to live all that we are.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” I have often thought how lucky I am to have what I have in the world, a great home, loving partner and awesome job but it is not luck that I have to appreciate. As my life has not always been this way, it is in fact a series of movements made from my body to value, honour and cherish who I am and shows that when we truly value and adore who we are, monumental shifts begin to then affirm this.
Self-worth is a true foundation from which to live from, knowing our true value and what we bring to the world.
And that is what I love about true self worth Thomas as it does not clock what we do, but the quality we bring to all that we do.
It is true that how we are with ourselves reflects back to us. So, it makes sense that if we love ourselves more on the inside that this will be confirmed from the outside.
Spot on Julie, very beautifully said. This also shows us that seeking confirmation/love from outside of us doesn’t really work. But isn’t this what a majority of us do? Hence why we have so many issues related to lack of self-worth and love.
Nothing can confirm your worth except for you, with your inner-light and the love from your innermost heart. And once this has been felt and is known, the love felt for others is immeasurably huge.
Natalie once said to me when those thoughts of putting yourself down or giving yourself a hard time are there you have to cut them and not go into them. At first I didn’t get it, then I started to observe this more and realised the untruth of all those thoughts and how time consuming and exhausting they are.
Developing self-worth provides a foundation from which to have not only a relationship with ourselves but with all others. So much simplicity in relationships comes from this foundation.
Have a love affair with yourself and life. Pretty cool. Then anything that comes from this is an absolute bonus. The foundation is set – based on you, and your love for yourself and life. What a base to live from. Love it.
This made me laugh as it is so true for me also. . . ” I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!” . . . this says it all! And when we look at it from this angle we can never allow any form of abusive self-talk in again.
‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.’ True Dragana, once we step out of the struggle we have made life to be, the whole perspective about life and ourselves is changing, we are no longer the victims of what happens but feel we are the ones that make life as it is or we make the choice to love ourselves first.
Life is responsive, it’s an interactive intelligence that we’re all in relationship with all of the time, even if we don’t realise it.
‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.’ Well said Dragana, we live love we get so much more back – that is the way of the universe.
Beautiful Dragana, so true, our gorgeous muscled organ that pumps all the blood through our system needs love, a beholding of love, that comes from within you — you holding yourself in the most love you know yourself to be worth (forever expanding this) and this building of a relationship with you , your heart and your whole beingness is than called an love affair or any name you would like to use really..
‘I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!’ HaHa,You could not have said this more clearly than you do now Dragana and I take it as a reminder when I choose my critical voice again pushing me to be someone who I am not.
This is so true, we distract ourselves to avoid feeling the emptiness within.
Becoming aware of the way we speak to ourselves can initially be quite shocking as we realise that we would never speak to another the way we speak to ourselves.
Bringing an awareness to what is truly going on in our heads that effects how we feel about ourselves and our worth is something that every single one of us can look at. To clock the words we speak to ourselves and hear and feel how they are is such a great place to begin to self-love.
Reading your words Dragana show me the simplicity of self worth, that it is knowing who we truly are. So it makes sense the more and deeper we care for ourselves the better we get to know ourselves and thus unravel who we are.
This is huge — this is power.
This is one of the most beautiful things someone truly said:
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth”. I am in awe, I am with God as much as I surrender to be..
“but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself” This goes totally against the common held belief that life is hard, and owes us something, it is the school of hard knocks, and that murphy’s law rules the roost….I could go on. What you are offering here Dragana, is quite profound as it is quite the opposite. Life does want us to nurture ourselves, and deep down we do know that otherwise we would not feel the tension of us not being more self-loving and self-caring.
How true is this, “I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!” It’s the conversation many of us don’t or can’t hear and that is the one that goes on inside us. Even the most ‘together’ or ‘successful’ person can have a level of self talk that goes well beyond what we would allow from someone else. Why do we allow or accept something in our own body that we wouldn’t do when it’s offered from others or in front of others. Continually being aware of how we are speaking to ourselves supports us in many ways as this can be the marker also of how we first speak to others.
Developing a love affair with myself is something that happens in small ways, in the way I care for myself, in the way I keep my home clean and ordered. But it also needs an inner declaration, a moment of saying “yes I do want to be in love with all I am, and have that be a daily development”.
Life does love us back when we are loving with ourselves.
Life doesn’t stop loving us even when we’re not loving ourselves, it’s just that our perception more often than not is of a loveless world.
This self-worth is a biggie, it interferes in everything we do but when we connect to this worth and know that we are more than what is being projected at us, nothing can displace us.
Life is infinitely more expanded for me by my connection to Serge Benhayon and his presentations of the Ageless Wisdom There is so much need for us to be honest with ourselves first then this allows us to be the same with others. We are all love we just need to remember, and live it.! Thank you Dragana!
‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself’. You cannot love life if you are holding onto hurts. We are here to heal our hurts, to let them go and open up to receive more love and as we do, life does indeed love us back.
‘and not knowing my own self-worth’. This line is totally relevant for me right now, because that is exactly what I have been experiencing. Yes I have a good feeling on the qualities I bring, but I have not truly embodied this, but the more I feel into this and observe the changes that take place at my work, there is no escaping the fact that the way I live now has an impact on all others. I am also feeling like something old and heavy that was weighing me down has been lifted and the road ahead is clear for me. And only now can I truly appreciate all I bring and in that appreciation I feel this expansion as I claim my self-worth.
We can never tire of talking about self-worth .. until every single person on the planet has multitudes of it. From my experience it is never something you can grab, buy or try to get, instead it is, as you have shared, how much do we love ourselves and we can always always truly and deeply love ourselves more .. it is bottomless! I love this ‘The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.’
“…..craving love, touch, appreciation, connection – and not knowing my own self-worth.” Oh yes I know this so well. If I am not loving and appreciating myself I automatically look outside of me for attention, affection, appreciation and love. But just by looking outside of myself for this I am automatically not valuing myself. If I need someone to give me love it means I don’t have it for myself.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” We all seek love, to be loved and cherished and to return that love in full and when we connect to the love within our own inner-heart we connect to the Divine love of God and it just keeps growing and deepening.
‘Re-learning to self-worth has been a huge piece of my work and it is still in progress.’ This is true for me too. have been buying a new car for some time now and realise how I have been keeping myself from buying an expensive car because I some how feel that I don’t deserve it. I love that you use self worth as a verb because it reminds me that in every moment I can be in the process of valuing myself and allowing an ever deepening quality to my life.
This is a beautiful thing to realize . . . . “I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” . . . for life is a reflection and what we put out there we ultimately get reflected back to us, so what a great reflection.
‘for life is a reflection and what we put out there we ultimately get reflected back to us’, a timely reminder Kathleen, of course life is a reflection and if we don’t like the reflection, all we have to do is make different choices – choices that deepen our sense of self-worth and self-love.
This blog today invites me to look at where I am at with regards to my own self-worth which has always been hugely in lack. Although my self-worth has been developed over the years, it does feel there is more for me to claim in regards to knowing deeply that I deserve and that I am worthy of love.
This is a great call back to responsibility, to realise that the way we treat ourselves sets the level of our own worth, that may be why it’s called “self-worth”!
“I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!” This is something to reflect upon every now and then, to stop and take note how we treat ourselves and if we would have another treat ourselves this way. We all deserve to be treated super lovingly, and it takes some dedication to make this our everyday living.
A lack of self-worth is so prevalent for the vast majority of us. In my case I used to be rock bottom with it, not feeling I had any value to offer and that I was literally ‘worthless’! Through the inspiration of Universal Medicine and the entire Benhayon family I have come to know myself and absolutely feel my value in relation to the whole by my expression and what I bring. My sense of worth has done a gigantic U turn and life has taken a whole new perspective.
‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself’. This is a very power statement and the truth of it oozes out for us all to feel. We overlook our own beauty and amazingness, it is not life or another person – we are amazing and it is time we brought the love to ourselves that we all deserve.
‘…not only do I love life, but that life loves me back..’ This is a gorgeous awareness and one that rings true – the science of reflection is inescapable and life is constantly reflecting the quality of what we live back to us.
Developing our relationship with our essence is the gateway to deeper levels of love that we can ever imagine, as it is only then that we realise we are all knowing sons of God.
Re-learning to self-worth opens magnificent doors we can walk into. Not doing it, leave us to choose between doors that lead nowhere. We know this.
The more we nurture and love ourselves, the greater our self-worth becomes, and the more we are able to truly love life with all that is reflected back, each reflection gives us a new opportunity to deepen our self-love and our self-worth.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.” love is all around us and within the space between and around all our particles. our love is just waiting for us to connected and live this love, thank you Dragana, for affirming and living your true self worth.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” A beautiful summation of love and how our movements can shift and re-connect us back to the one true home we all hold and in our own time return too without judgement or comparison just the knowing that the more we surrender and commit to the simplicity of love in our movements the more we see the divine mirror that back to us.
How true this is of so many human beings, and we don’t often question it – “that I should accept and settle down with what I thought I deserved”. Everywhere around us is a reflection confirming the same, struggle, misery, escape through materialism, etc yet the emptiness remains which I now know from our own life can only be filled by this loving relationship with ourselves. Our love is there to be connected to and lived in every daily moment and choice, and cannot be compared to anything that the outer world can offer. Everything we have ever wanted is right there within us.
It has been a long road home for me, I think it is important to clock and appreciate how far I have come with my self-worth but it seems like I still have a long way to go. Great to read blogs like this that pave the way for us all.
You bring to light a very profound point Dragana which highlights our very purpose of being here. It is through developing a self-loving relationship with ourselves that allows us to live more of who we are, bringing to life a quality that is enriching beyond measure. For as we live with greater connection to our essence, our Soul, we realise our interconnectedness with God, the universe and all is our natural way of being, and how this superlative relationship is what truly confirms everything we so magnificently are.
‘The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.’ I find this to be true too, and of course the deeper the self worth the greater the appreciation and love. Definitely a life long love affair in the making. Thank you Dragana for sharing this.
It is very true Dragana, we do not know our true worth as women, growing up with so many pictures, expectations and ideals around who and what we are supposed to be, when our real worth lies with us knowing who we are from our essence first… honour that and we will have a very different experience of ourselves in life.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.” Where does love come from? How come we love looking at the stars? Is it because Love comes from The Universe? So, how beautiful is it to allow the love to come from the Universe by loving ourselves in every way in all the detail caressing and nurturing ourselves to the bone so, then, we receive it from The Universe.
The more I am learning to value myself the more I can feel I am being valued by others. This plays out in little but huge ways in my life.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” A gorgeous line Dragana on how we affirm our love for self through our movements to nurture and support ourselves in life and how these movements then offer a reflection of love to all. Truly inspiring thank you.
The way that we come to truly know the love that God is, is through our love for ourselves. There is no other way because God and Us are One and the Same and so to dive into self-love is to dive into the loving body of God. One day we’ll all dive so deeply into Love that we will disappear completely as we’re all re-absorbed back into the Body of God. The One Unifying Love that is all that there is and all that they will ever be.
Thank you Dragana, I really appreciated the idea that self-worth is a verb not just a noun, that we self-worth ourselves. It’s very true because our worth comes from our active relationship our self and our life through our choices. We can actually “self-worth” in every moment by the love we choose to live from.
It is a Joy to re-visit this blog Dragana. Being ‘worthy of love’ – to what depth do I ACTUALLY acknowledge this and embrace it in full? Is there any SLIVER of resistance to this within me – that I could not celebrate how deeply beautiful and amazing a being I am and shout it from the rooftops?
Yes, there is, and I will commit myself today, to appreciating myself deeply and saying yes to the verb version you’ve introduced us to so lightly yet wisely Dragana Brown… I will ‘self-worth’ and celebrate myself in everything I do, to the best of my ability, and see how I come out on the other side…
A beautiful sharing and a great learning that love is something that first comes from within. There are many layers to this that I am still learning and letting go of patterns that seek it from the outside.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth” this is so true Dragana, the more self-love we bring to our bodies the more access we have to the multidimensionality of the universe where we know we are in constant communication with the stars, thank you.
A great sharing thankyou Dragana. The underlying causes of a lot of our personal and social problems are not often explored. Like you said that you used to live with a degree of lack of self-worth, and if this treatment came from another you wouldn’t accept it. It makes we wonder why we begin to accept a non-loving relationship with self in the fist place?
I recognise this. That longing for touch and affection. We think we need it, but when we get it we just want more of it and it creates an endless cycle of wanting and need. If it is then unavailable what do we do and how are we left? There is no true power in this.
As with you, my self-worth and self-love from knowing Serge Benhayon, Simone Benhayon, Natalie Benhayon and Sara Williams to name a few .. has completely changed in that I actually have this now and know what this truly means and feels like within my body. However, from what has unfolded for me in the last couple of days I know that this is a never ending process for we can always love both ourselves and others more as there is no end point with this, for it is boundless and has no limits.
The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth. Confirmation feels awesome to receive which opens up a deeper appreciation of all I am choosing….
Dragana, this is awesome – using self worth as a verb rather than a noun for it puts the knowledge from the head into a livingness of the body which then truly brings alive the body. “Re-learning to self-worth”!
Re-building our self-worth can also be supported by us being honest and opening up ourselves to the love and wisdom that we can learn from understanding the imperfections of ourselves, others and the world around us.
For me re-building my self worth has been a natural by product of dismantling all of the imposing appendages that I’ve accumulated since my childhood. Self worth isn’t something that I have had to consciously focus on, I haven’t needed to put affirmations on my bathroom mirror, I have simply had to discard the ‘who I am not’ and then gradually over time, without even noticing that it’s been happening I realised that I feel super fab about myself. Truly I do.
It so true “that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.” Life is a feedback loop so the more we love ourselves, the more love we are with others and the more love we get back which supports us to be more love. A beautiful equation but the root of it, without which none of the rest can follow is that we are more loving with ourselves first. If we start with even the tiniest of steps, all the love in the universe can then come back to us.
Making self-worth a verb is so cool – re-learning to self worth takes us to the ‘being-ness’ of it as a place that resides within us all, untouched and waiting for us to connect to.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth”; powerful and wise words Dragana. Building, growing, expanding, deepening ones self worth is certainly the bridge to the soul.
Well said Dragana. I am discovering so much more about worth, so much that is beyond material value – in fact none of what I am learning is about material value! Worth is an inside out experience and it underpins all behaviours that we express as well as the what we accept from others. Just taking a moment to contemplate there may be more than we have seen so far will open up a whole new perspective – I highly recommend it! Major appreciation to Esoteric Womens Health for the heads up moments!!!
I love what you share here Dragana, that the more we connect with ourselves then more we connect with the universe, with God, as that is what we are made of and through that have a constant communication with. We only have to connect to our bodies and let go that wandering mind as that will not lead us anywhere as can be so clearly seen from our history here on earth. While we think from the mind that we are advancing, our bodies are suffering from the false lives we live, and with false life I mean to live in disconnection with that essence within, living in disconnection from our father, of God.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” This is a beautiful confirmation of how truly powerful choices can be and when we make our choices about love and support for self first the world engages with these choices and drops more moments of love into our lives too. Love is an expansion of the divine and when first felt within it is reflect outwardly too.
Dragana, I absolutely love what you have shared here: “I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like), affirms my worth. I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” – This love affair with self is so ‘needed’ for us all… self worth is something I certainly can work more deeply on, but what I have found is that in fact when I am myself and deeply connected to Soul, the notion of self worth does not even cross the mind as it is the most natural thing in the world. However, when I an disconnected and faded in my connection to Soul, then self worth comes into play and I feel doubts and questions and the criticism sneak in. So connection here is the key for me, and in that lies a self worth so solid, there is nothing to shake it.
‘The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth. I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in’. This is an exquisite sharing Dragana, thank you.
Beautifully said Dragana, to build more love in our life we need to lay the foundation of love within.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” this is so true Dragana the more I live this, the more God and the universe confirms me in everything I do, and the simpler my life becomes. All the complexities and barriers I have formed through lack of self worth fall away. Imagine if what we have been shown through Universal Medicine was taught in mainstream education how different life would be, lack of self worth in both men and women is the cause of so many problems in our society today.
I think every woman on this planet can relate to what you have shared Dragana. Very inspiring to read and to learn from the wisdom shared in this blog and the comments.
To understand the importance of self-worth it helps to first understand our energetic anatomy in the sense that we are made up of both spirit and Soul. Our Soul is a great body of love that is birthed forth from a greater body of love that we have come to call ‘God’ or ‘the Universe’. Our spirit is a fragment of this that has separated from this Oneness in pursuit of a creation unto its own, our tiny search for ‘self’, individuality and identity in the world/Universe we live within by which we seek to stand a-part, alone and not with the Whole we are from. What this means is that by virtue of separating from this body of love, our spirit is living in separation to our true essence, which is love. Hence the perpetual seeking for recognition, identification etc. all driven from a want and a need to belong, be seen etc. because deep down we crave the love and Oneness of our origins.
In order for the spirit to come home to the one true light of the Soul, we need to break out of the self-loathing cycle that keeps us bound in separation to our true selves (our Soul) and to each other. Self-love is the bridge back home for this wayward part of us in the sense that before we can allow the body of love that is our Soul to work in and through our physical form, we have to first prepare a vehicle that can enhouse it. This is why self-care, self-worth and self-love is so important for they are the beginnings of a deeper acceptance we all must come to that the human spirit is not our true expression and that only by loving and caring for ourselves can we begin to make such a journey home to the true love within our hearts.
It makes sense to use the word ‘self-worth’ as a verb as it is something we have to actively choose for ourselves! No one can give it to us, however much they would want to do so.
It seems strange that we have to relearn to have worth for ourselves when as a baby we definitely did not start that way. It highlights how even as we are growing up we are being taught to live in a way that does not confirm our worth at all and actually disempowered us from expressing our truth.
To self-worth or to self-loath that is the question? One that is oh so powerful in our day to choose. Really if we self-worth there is no room for anything less than that… and more of an opportunity to deepen our awareness and appreciation of our worth. A lot of time I see it as a noun, something I should or need to have, and other times as a verb when I’m living it.
Re-discovering our self worth and the act of valuing ourselves is a fascinating and beautiful process: the more I learn to deeply love and appreciate myself, the more I see and feel the extent of the disregard I’ve been living in and treating myself with. It’s only through loving myself more that I can accept the choices I’ve made, instead of beating myself up for them. And I’m noticing that what you say is true: the more I learn to love and value myself, the more this gets reflected back to me by the Universe. Having believed for so long that I had to do it all on my own, and that the world needed me to do it all, my body is showing me differently: it can’t and won’t do it all, and is demanding some care and rest. In starting to let go of this drive and hardness, as if by magic, opportunities have come my way that have supported me to let go, to allow the rest and drop the guilt.
Self worth keeps echoing through my head, heart and soul Dragana as I read your blog. Over the past years I have begun to understand the damage lack of self worth inflicts on others and myself. I am learning to deepen love for myself, express that love and in turn receive and feel Universal love.
Beautifully expressed Shirl and I imagine many women feel the same. Once we choose to appreciate all that we bring and live with self-worth is a blessing for us all because the effects ripples out far and beyond.
All my life I have not been that good in self-worth (which should be a verb) until I met Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine who presented to me a way of being that builds from what lives inside of me, instead of what is brought to me from the outside. This way of being has connected me with a love that lives within and that is always there to support me in being me, not asking me to be anything else but me and continuously supports me to build my self-worth from inside out, that is always there and does not need the confirmation from anyone or anything outside. A lovely way to be.
Re-learning to self-worth and along with appreciation supports us to let go of judgement, comparison and jealousy. It is shocking to observe sometimes what can be expressed when we have a lack of self-worth, because mostly it comes with harmful expressions that come loaded with comparison and jealousy and this does not support us to evolve or appreciate each other. So, relearning to self-worth is beneficial for us and people around us.
Very true, the more we do this for ourselves, the more we can share this with children so they don’t grow up thinking lack of self-worth is normal, alongside comparison and jealousy.
Self-worth is a forever relationship with ourselves and others… if we limit our worth in an aspect of life then this flows into the whole and likewise when we deeply love and honour ourselves, life lovingly confirms us back.
Self worth is indeed something from the inside out and not from the outside in as to me, many of us are used to living. For instance when you have high marks on an essay it could feed your feeling of self worth, but later on at the gym, we could easily experience the completely opposite, making us lower our feeling of self worth. How different is that when we make self worth only connected to who we are, to the loveliness that we feel within. Allowing that experiment into our lives is wise to do, as it will actually bring us back to who we truly are and in that connection real self worth will be found.
I too am learning to develop my self-worth Dragana. It has been really exposing at times but deeply powerful and supportive in all areas of my life when I fully claim who I am.
Self-worth is definitely a verb, and I would love to see your definition be exchanged for the one in the dictionary. Our self worth is defined by our every single choice that we make throughout the day, there is no way that is a fixed thing, but rather a variable quality that requires someone to choose it, and work on it, and then keep choosing it.
And what I have found Meg is that self worth leads to more self worth in much the same way as lack of self worth leads to even more lack of self worth. My self worth keeps increasing as I keep expanding. Much of my self worth is based on my ability to apply the teachings of The Ageless Wisdom and as a result be an open channel for God to come through. It’s not a ‘hey look at what I can do’, it’s a ‘wohea holy macaroni look what’s possible for us all if we apply the teachings of The Ageless Wisdom. We can become grander and grander versions of ourselves’
Dragana, I love how you have used “to self worth” as a verb – this is brilliant! And a wonderful reminder of the depth of connection with soul that we have access to and this in turn can really be a game changer in how we see ourselves and treat ourselves, and value ourselves and all that we have to bring. It is indeed about appreciation of self, but also of self in our willingness to be open to what can come through us from the depth of that connection with our soul.
Stunning and true. I believe self-worth to be something we must actively action and therefore I would consider it a verb as well. Somehow, leaving it as a noun, I feel it is something we can leave for the ‘outside-in’, something that we get from others or can be described as having. That is fine but it also has the potential to give us the excuse to abdicate responsibility for our own self-worth. Bringing it into activity firmly ensures we bring a focus to ensuring it comes from the ‘inside-out’.
Bringing it into activity also empowers us to know that we can choose our own level of self worth, it’s not dependant on the world around us, or how people treat us, or whether our family accept us – no, it is legitimately our choice.
I hadn’t appreciated that Meg, well said.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back…”
Good point Dragana, it is my experience also, that the more I regard, honour and love myself, the more regard, honouring and love is reflected to me in my daily life. Whatever we put out is what eventually comes back to us, which is one of the energetic laws taught by Serge Benhayon, really is a truth that can be experienced by all.
I love this line too. It’s just so awesome that how we are in life is reflected back to us and comes back to us. When we choose to read and understand these reflections there’s the opportunity for evolution: knowing that if we’re reacting to something, it’s not an issue with the person or situation, but an opportunity to go deeper, and look at how we are in the world in the first place.
Well said Bryony, it is so easy to react and find someone or something we can blame for what is happening to us, however this is only shirking the responsibility to re-balance what we have created in the first place.
I had a very real example of this today when I was feeling annoyed and frustrated at another’s resentment and how that affected everyone and everything. What was very cool, even though it was uncomfortable to feel, I knew this was a reflection for me to find the places where I harbour resentment or are holding on to hurts that I perceive are from wrongs.
I love this Dragana, ‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. ‘ Making choices that truly support us is key to deepening the relationship with ourselves first that supports all our relationships to grow and evolve.
What if the relationship we have with our self is the shaper of all other relationships? And what if how we are with our self is how people are with us and changing this foundational relationship changes everything?
What I have noted and begun to appreciate more and more of late is just how powerful life’s daily reflections are. Our daily living mirrors to us just how we treat ourselves everyday: be it with love or not with love by the choices we make, through our interactions with people and nature as a whole. Our responsibility and choice to commit to ourselves and our connection is where the true love lies and that is much to appreciate and embrace everyday.
‘…fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.’
This is the key. Not needing anything from the outside to confirm our worth as there is already everything within. All we need to do is know it, feel it, appreciate it and build our relationship with the vastness of who we are.
Who would have thought that self-worth was something we had to work at, something to remember. We have got it upside down as a society, community, even human race, when we don’t support each other to stay connected to the self worth we innately have when we are born. At some point there will be more and more parents and teachers who will raise children to stay connected to this sense of self and make it the starting point for everything they do in life. It has already started!
I love the idea of self-worth being a verb. It then become something we can action and make part of our daily routines.
It’s amazing isn’t it how we can speak to ourselves in ways we would never do to someone else, at least the majority of us. Learning to have a loving relationship with myself has taken some time but is very rewarding. The love feeding itself back.
Fulfilment is a great word to describe the effect of building self-worth – filling up from the inside out as you say Dragana, so that our cup over runs to share with all.
Me too, I have been learning about self-worth, and I know that there still is a part in me that thinks I am undeserving and I have to earn love somehow, and what’s exposing is that when I think like that I have already interpreted ‘love’ as something outside of me. This is an ongoing process for me. The more I understand love as beholding, the more I feel it as my own responsibility to live the love that I am.
What an amazing piece Dragana, and today you inspire me constantly to develop this self-loving relationship with myself.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.” this sentence is inspiring to feel deeper into the love that I have for life, and seeing that this is what I shouldn’t forget. Life is a magnificent place to learn, get to know ourselves, and live our own worth.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth. “I have also found this to be true Dragana, and in many beautiful and confirming ways. We are so worth loving.
Yes Dragana, I remember when I first learnt that self-worth was a result of all the choices I made and whether they were with true self-regard, or not. This understanding made perfect sense for the first time of how we either build and establish a sense of self-worth, or how we erode it, leaving us with a so-called lack of it. Such a simple thing to remedy with every choice.
I felt like I really needed to read this blog tonight, as much as I have come along way with self worth, it seems it is a forever unfolding and today I needed a reminder of how important it is to value our relationship with ourselves.
I’m having such a good time in my relationship with myself, I love it! I have always been fascinated by human behaviour, especially my own and so I love watching what I do, how I do it and pondering on why I do it. I love making changes and feeling the effects of those changes. I love feeling the effects of how I’m being on those around me. I really do just love life and all that’s on offer.
Reclaiming your worth as a woman I am learning is not about building yourself up but is about letting go of what you have taken on that isn’t you that you then judge yourself for or measure yourself against.
Self-worth is such a worthwhile thing to be conscious of, I have struggled with self-worth or lack of it all my life but now through Universal Medicine and The Way of The Livingness I know we are all equally worth it as much as each other and that we all come from love, it just needs to be constantly worked at.
It is interesting to observe how I have allowed in the past that lack of self-worth into my life, although at the time it was a normal state of being knowingly that something crucial was missing, creating that feeling of lacking self-worth. Now, with the help of Serge Benhayon, Universal Medicine and the many associated with them, I have found a completely different perspective in myself regarding self-worth. I have developed a deep relationship with myself and in that I have rekindled an inner knowing that I know always was there but not able to grasp at that time. It is through building that inner connection with my inner most that made my self-worth grow naturally, and with that I can conclude that of course, that when we are not connected with that grandness within we cannot then constantly feel that we are missing something we innately know, but have disconnected from. This then allows the space to feed that lack of self-worth from within, and with that we come to feel what the energy of this disconnection does to us.
‘…life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself…’ I love this line. So different to the reality of hardship I’ve created. I’m inspired to be open to this truth and feel it in my day, to notice all the obstacles I put in life’s way, to take responsibility for these obstacles and not use them to falsely confirm a way of living that requires me to believe life is a struggle.
‘which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in’. A beautifull summary of self-worth … it is confirmed by the love we have for ourselves not by how others perceive or see us. Through knowing Serge Benhayon, the Benhayon family and Universal Medicine I now have a relationship and love for myself that I have not had in this life apart from when I was a child. This continues to unfold and expand and the truly beautifull thing about this is the more love I have for myself the more love I have for others. For me self-worth is ultimately how much are we willing to love ourselves? If we choose this can be forever deepening and limitless 💕
It’s so true that the more we self-love the more love we feel coming back to us. It’s one of those divine miracles of life that we try not to believe but is obvious the moment we make a movement towards ourselves with love.
To treat ourselves as the divine beings we are you could say is our responsibility, as anything less than this is not appreciating and honouring of the all that we are. I love this line Dragana, “The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.”
I find it absolutely amazing that it took me a lifetime to find out what love truly means. Thanks to the presentations by Serge Benhayon I have tasted the true meaning of love and am endeavouring to live with love flowing through my body!
Why have we issues with self-worth I am asking myself. Is it because we have walked away from the amazing being we actually are and from that live a lesser life than we deserve to live?
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth. I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” Self-Love is the most essential ingredient that we usually forget to include and then we get disappointed when things don’t work out the way we expected.
I am also learning to self-worth. I too have been hugely inspired by Serge Benhayon’s presentations to deepen my relationship with my self and with others. It is by building on my self-worth, expanding on my expression and self-love that I am now feeling incredible.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” This line is so beautiful Dragana and shows that the true path to love is from our re-connection to our heart’s calling. That path is built from our foundation of true love, support and care for ourselves. Thank you.
A beautiful blog – If every woman awakened the true power and nurturing that they are – this world would be one amazing planet to walk upon
” The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” Absolutely the power is within us all, how beautiful, just need to feel and connect.
Like you Dragana It is through the inspiration of Serge, Simone and Natalie Benhayon that I too have become aware of self worth and what this means for me. It is not something I can make happen but through a constant building of acceptance and appreciation which then relinquishes the self bashing and allows the love that is there for myself to come to the fore
Sounds similar to how I used to play golf with all that self bashing and yelling ‘fore’. Much like you Alison I am a work in progress as I build on bringing choices that are more self-appreciating.
Life loves us back – this is so true Dragana, we are all so loved so much more then we know, yet we can spend our days pushing away this love. “The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth” The simplicity and clarity of this blog is just gorgeous, thank you Dragana.
Self-worth is an amazing thing, as when you have/live it, it can never be kept for one self!
I absolutely love the concept of self worth as a verb. Thank you Dragana.
I so get this and have also had the same thought many times – “I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!”… and yet I can be quite on top of ‘someone else’ talking down to me or being condescending but I often leave go the incessant voice coming from seeing myself as less. It’s very interesting.
I have also been tremendously inspired by the people you mention, who have chosen to live in a way that reflects all that we are.
I can relate to what you share here Dragana – of wanting to be filled up from the outside in and needing confirmation and love from outside before I start to feel good about myself, and if this isn’t there then I drop again and my self esteem goes down instead of consistently holding myself in who I am and allowing this to be expressed outwardly without concern for what comes back.
Self-worth. I used to think or feel this was something I needed to attain or something that was ‘out there’ outside of me, that if I just found would mean I then have self-worth, or would validate my self-worth and that I was ‘worth it’. This can also be bastardised in the thinking or feeling that we deserve something like chocolate cake because we are ‘worth it’. But thankfully what I have sensibly come to feel and realise is that self-worth comes from within us, and unfolds through building a steady and loving relationship with ourselves, as you have I have come to this awareness, love and understanding by the teachings and reflections of living from Serge Benhayon, the Benhayon family, and Universal Medicine practitioners such as Sara Williams.
So much of what you have expressed in this blog Dragana I resonate with; none more than relearning to self-worth. Whilst it is a work in progress I am also relearning to appreciate the worth, love and wisdom I hold; we all hold.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth. I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” Beautiful Dragana. Learning to look inside, not outside for answers – how empowering is that! Alongside asking for support when needed.
I spent many years thinking that I ‘had to take what I could get’ and living under the belief that what I got was all I deserved. Of course what I got was always abuse and unappreciative treatment and through similar support that you describe Dragana, I have come to realise that perhaps these reflections were only coming due to my relationship with my own self-worth.
It is extraordinary that we do not let others speak to us in such ways but allow this from ourselves. Saying no to these thoughts is a great step forward in developing self-loving talk and in knowing we are worth more than we allow ourselves to believe at any moment.
It really is a re-learning! We are complete from the moment we are born, we are divine and always are. We just allow all the hurts and protections to overlay the amazing wisdom and love that we are, to take over. So self worth is about letting go of all of that and reconnecting to that which we are.
How tragic is it that somewhere along the line we find ourselves believing that we have little or no worth. When you look at a baby and can see their love and worth to then find them a few years later unable to connect to their own love and self-worth,there has to be something that goes on that brings this about. Isn’t it time to look at how we are living that robs us of our self-worth and knowingness that we are actually love?
When we love and appreciate ourselves it is reflected in the world around us, through other people and nature. The focus of love and our worthiness coming from the outside only leaves us drained and a feeling that life owes us something when the truth is the complete opposite. I am finding that the more I love myself and share this love the more my self worth is confirmed – this makes loving myself even more worth it.
It’s like peeling away layers of disregard to find the gold that is our self-worth and we find this through being caring and loving of ourselves. I say peeling layers because it doesn’t just happen because we wish it would. When there is a lifetime of disregard and self-abuse it does take time. It is however worth it, just as we are.
Beautifully expressed Jennifer. I love what you’ve shared here. Also what I have experienced is once we choose self-worth this also helps us peel away more layers of protection, disregard and abuse that often obscure the gold that is within us all.
Life loves us back when we love ourselves, yes Dragana, beautifully expressed. This is an undeniable truth. It can be seen in how we feel about ourselves. If I am to love myself then I won’t accept others talking to me in a belittling or bullying way, and neither should I. No one should accept anything less than love from another and that first comes from how we act toward ourselves. We either give unspoken permission by giving the impression we are not worthy, or we move with a clear value of self. This is the choice we all make.
Where do we place ourselves on the list of things that we like and love?
Rediscovering self-worth is massive, we are so immensely precious and totally gorgeous and we place so little value on this, and I would say it’s a verb too, it’s definitely something that needs care and attention always.
Just like you Dragana ‘I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!’ We can be our own worst enemy sometimes and looking at our self talk in this way is a great way of being honest about how easily we can undermine and be hard on ourselves and continue to feed the vicious circle of low self worth.
The more I choose self-love and self-worth the more I feel the love and depth in others.
Dragana, I love what you offer here and in particular that you speak of self worth as a verb. I feel strongly the responsibility in this for us all to care for and nurture our self worth, to ‘self worth’ ourselves. Anything else is just a game and we do not need to play it and it starts with being honest and curious about ourselves and life, feeling what works and what may not and remaining forever discerning and open, understanding that deep in us is a knowing that we are worth it. I get glimpses of this at times and am today reminded that it’s about continuing to build my understanding and relationship with my own love and worth.
I love what you have written here Dragona, ‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself’, I feel this too, I went from being someone who had very low self-esteem, not enjoying work or people to now loving life; feeling purpose and enjoying working and being part of my community, my self-worth has increased hugely to the point that I would now consider myself to be a confident person, and I now love and take care of myself, its great to read your article Dragona and to reflect and appreciate these changes.
Thank you Dragona for this beautiful article on self worth and its importance in life. The more I am learning to rediscover this also I realise it is the foundation of ourselves and all our relationships and life and is sorely lacking amongst us all and the claiming of who we are. Building this in our lives makes the difference to our choices and how we live and the support we receive from the universe becomes more and more obvious. I love your article and all you share it is invaluable loving and very supportive
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.” When I re-read this today I feel a holding in life that is there for everyone of us when I accept I am worthy of this love. In accepting this it is then natural to love, care and nurture oneself. Than you Dragana.
Absolutely Brendan – beautifully and simply stated.
“This made me aware how I used to think that I should accept and settle down with what I thought I deserved – read: NOT much and certainly NOT love. I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!” Exactly Dragana – why abuse ourselves in a way that we would never accept from another. Up until not very long ago I was running a program of “there’s something wrong with me” which only allowed the self-abuse to continue. What I’ve come to understand is that there’s nothing wrong with any one of us and that we simply need to connect back to the Divine being we truly are.
The biggest realization that I have had about self-worth or the lack of it is the realization that I am the one that perpetuates the lack of self-worth and not someone else causing my lack of self-worth.
I just love how the perfect blog appears when it is needed, as this one of yours has today Dragana. And today these words reminded me how far I have come from the stressed out woman whose self-worth was all but nonexistent. “This made me aware how I used to think that I should accept and settle down with what I thought I deserved”. Oh did I do this, far too many times, and now when I read and feel these words I hardly recognise the woman whose self worth was so low that she accepted less than she deserved. Today your wise words have offered me the space to take stock of how far I have come, accompanied by the inner knowing that there is so much more yet to unfold.
Just when I think I understand self-worth, something comes up to show me how I can embrace this deeper. The Universe throws down the challenge daily.
I talked to a woman yesterday evening who coaches women. She shared with me that lack of self-worth is an epidemic. I totally agree with her. It made me realize that if we don’t have self-worth, we cannot truly take care of ourselves because we need the worth, as a foundation.
“I became aware that I not only do I love life but that life loves me back and it wants me to nurture myself”. I love this Dragana. As I deepen my own sense of self worth and love for myself, life does indeed reflect that back to me too.
This line, ‘the English Dictionary describes this double-barreled word as a noun, I would say it is a verb too,’ is brilliant. It’s remarkable how powerful we really are when it comes to how we are with ourselves – whether we choose to self-love or self-destruct. The choice is ours. We are never victims.
Wow that would be an interesting community discussion around that. For sure. I would love to see that happening because it is such an issue for so many people. From that stems a lot of unwanted behaviours that effect all of us so much.
The most important word in our re-development of self-worth is NO.. Saying NO to anything and everything that is not love
To practice self-worth is on my daily agenda since I started attending courses with Universal Medicine. I realized that lack of self-worth is the reason for almost all issues I had with life. It’s a powerful tool to have in my pocket to be able to take responsibility in life.
I used to find it very hard to self-worth, but what I am finding is that the more I appreciate, love, nurture myself – the less it becomes about me.
I can relate to all you so wisely share with us Dragana. Having to re-learn self-worth in my own life as well, the reflections I received from the role models around me supported me greatly with this as well. Natalie Benhayon, Miranda Benhayon and Serge Benhayon have been amazing people that live their life with true love and joy consistently, they have been incredibly inspiring for myself and countless others as well.
That life wants me to nurture myself is a new idea for me, but if I understand the rhythm of me and how that relates to the rhythm of the universe then this makes total sense and it makes a nonsense for me to be swimming against the tide of my rhythms in any way.
Self-worth is so super important. I am realising recently that it is actually our responsibility to have self-worth as without it the negative impacts affect us all
Brilliantly said Joshua. I had never thought about self-worth in terms of responsibility but you’re spot on. The negative impact of low self-worth is huge. For a start thinking one isn’t of importance cuts off one from the truth that we are all connected. If I do not bring all of me then we all suffer. Ironically I had once associated building self-esteem with being selfish and feeling amazing was big-headed, when actually building self-worth becomes more about us all.
It takes self-worth to a whole new level to feel its wider impact for all when we do not hold it enough in our lives. Ironically we think self-worth and self-value means you are ‘up yourself’ yet when these are expressed in their truth they are something society cannot truly do without
Re-learning self-worth has and is still and unfolding process. I can liken what you are sharing Dragana to my own experience. It wasn’t until I have had ‘true’ role models in my life, Serge Benhayon, Natalie Benhayon, Miranda Benhayon, Simone Benhayon, these amazing people who are living in a away that is deeply loving, no drama, self honouring like i have not seen or felt ever before. Inspiring me every day to equally be self honouring and discard all that which is not me.
Thank you Dragona, this has been an ongoing journey for me, of developing my own self worth, I find the more appreciation I have of where I have come from and where I am now, my self worth and love takes on a deeper meaning.
As deepen my commitment to developing my self worth just like you Dragana I too am becoming everyday more ‘aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself’.
And whats more, ’ The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth’. Beautifully said Dragana, great blog.
Wow! thank you Dragona, I had to read and reread your amazing blog to get to the depth of the wisdom. Standing out for now ( for I am sure to explore and reread this blog again) is how when I ‘talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!’ This is so true with some of the unloving dialogue that I have with myself and also with others.
Moving forward and clearing that energy is now going to be a joy-full process of realisations, catching myself, responsibility and self-love to feel and connect deeply so to only have loving thoughts.
Appreciation of Self is the foundation of brotherhood -our ultimate goal. It is so easy to run round helping others but when it is motivated from our own lack of self worth and the “need to be needed” what we are offering is not true. To be there for someone in all your own glory is amazing for everyone.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” This is a great line Dragana and one I am coming to understand is as powerful as it is simple. God wants us all to succeed and there is an unlimited source of love – no one to compete with, including myself!
How often do we actually consider if the way we are living is what we deserve? Would we treat another, or perhaps a child in the same way? I know that I have come to realise that I am far more willing to love or look after others, but why can I care so much about making sure the little girl I babysit is warm and safe and eats right and has naps and cuddles etc. but not myself? What does it show her if I wrap her up warm to go to the park, but I’m cold. The freedom that loving yourself wholeheartedly would bring would be amazing – needing no other to love you, needing no one else to tell you that you’re enough, because all of that is given to you by yourself.
If we wouldn’t identify with our thoughts as in we are the ones that create them, it would be much easier to end self-worth issues. If we allowed ourselves to feel that we are given thoughts it wouldn’t be long until we saw the origin of our thoughts. They either come from inside (love) or from outside (not love). Then why would we give power to a force that doesn’t love us?
That is key in letting go of self worth issues Felix. Understanding and knowing where our thoughts are coming from. As they are not our own creation they are fed to us dependent on our choice of energy we have connected to. Either our inner heart, build with our capacity to self love, or from an outer source build on our feeling of insecurity and lack of self worth that in itself is a perpetuating movement we allow ourselves in. To me it is just a game we (unconsciously) are playing, as we try to not take the responsibility for our own life and wellbeing and in that to honour our inner feelings and inner knowing, but instead we are making ourselves dependant of the what is being told to us of how life should be lived.
Realising that our thoughts are not necessarily us, but seeing the difference between the thoughts coming from inside and those intruding from outside, is a very different approach to life, that indeed makes it much easier to discover, that self-worth issues are just something that is not us.
This has exposed the level of self worth or lack there of that I have for myself – your comment Dragana – ‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself’ is very powerful and asks that I love myself fully for I am beautiful and I bring beauty to the world. Gods loves and cherishes me and so it is time I take self-responsibility in doing the same.
How lovely to read about someone’s love affair with themselves and the comments of people sharing their own. Great work to return to the love that you are – more love stories like this please!
Even after years of working on it and at it, I still have self-worth issues, which I have to admit, if I think about it, all stems I guess from the root of all evil, no not money but comparison. This line here ‘ I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!’ is such a beauty and one I shall take on. I can’t say goodbye to me so I’ll just have to be less hard in myself and more loving and supportive and make this relationship with self work this time around.
Dragana what you share here is a great reminder that we need not compromise or settle for less than the love we are.
Beautiful Dragana, re-building self-worth so we can have the best love affair of our lives., I’m in.
‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back’, I love this line Dragana, it puts the truth of how we are all held in love in a way that struck my heart.
Yes, this line is awesome. Having shut out my own love and the worlds, and living from protection, I’ve taken a while to begin to trust the truth of this statement. But the more I’ve opened my heart and trust the more aware I’ve become of how loved we all are equally.
In the past I compared my life to people I thought had what I wanted. I saw this as unfair and that I wasn’t loved by God when actually it was simply me experiencing the consequences of my irresponsible actions and my lack of self-love. This was God loving me, allowing me the free will to learn from these reflections or not. Life has never not loved me back. Only now I get how, if I am loving with myself this is reflected in the relationships I have with others. And even when the reflections are not so pleasant like a car driving into me, I feel how perfect this was to get me to acknowledge something I was not prepared to look at.
Dragana, this blog is like finding another nugget of gold inside myself; a reminder that ‘The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.’ The quote here also confirms for me how aligned we are to the movement/connection in the universe. Being intrinsically part of it means everything I do, say, thinks etc affects the quality of the ALL! Thank you, I will reread again and again!
The self-worth store house within me is still filling up with supplies. The cupboard was near empty prior to being introduced to Universal Medicines supportive modalities, and desperate times called for desperate measures! (external seeking and recognition)
I am learning to gently tend to my needs and supply myself with the love and appreciation I deserve. My self-worth is growing!
“The self-worth store house within me is still filling up with supplies.” I love these words, and the imagery they produced Nicole had me smiling and tearful at the same time as they spoke to me so clearly. My store house of self worth was in the past also near to empty, but with the most amazing support of Serge Benhayon and the wonderful Universal Medicine modalities it is now looking deliciously full and still growing by the day.
More and more I become aware how life loves me back instead of the usual struggle there is place for joy, to enjoy myself in contact with other people, nothing to hide, just being together appreciating me and the love life can be or should I say the love life is.
Thank you Dragona and Annelies, when I take responsibility for who I am the love and nurturing is just a natural part of my day.
Natalie is such an inspiration to women. I remember when I first met her I thought she was awesome because she didn’t care what others thought and was just herself, I love this about her. What she has worked through herself and now the learnings she offers back to others are huge. Sometimes it will just be one sentence that she shares and it totally changes long held patterns of behaviour or ways of thinking. This is true women’s empowerment.
Learning to live life in a way that honors my self worth is something that I am also learning to do and it is an ever deepening journey
Self-worth is a long life commitment.
Absolutely, one has to keep working on self worth and be committed. Self worth is one of the foundations to keep a healthy life.
Self-worth is definitely an inside job.
That it is deborahmckay.
Thank you for this sharing Dragana. I love the line: “I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” and I have experienced the power and beauty that unfolds from this self-love-affair and a knowing that it is up to me to decide to have a true life-long love with myself and for ever unfolding relationships from there on. This is beautiful, inspiring and purposeful.
How gorgeous is it to know that when we love ourselves we are confirmed in this by God/the Universe. How absolutely awesome that we are so strongly a part of the Universe with our part to fully play and expand and evolve. How could we ever doubt our amazingness and how could we think to keep ourselves small?
“I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!” Thank you Dragana this is so true and a great reminder as recently I realised that the easiest way for me to bring myself down is exactly that – the words and way I speak to myself. I too have learnt I am worthy of love for myself first since Esoteric Womens Health came into my life.
I am feeling more and more how important it is to love myself, and how this helps me standing in the world, loving life, and life does indeed love me back as you write.
Well said Benkt. I am also finding that the more I learn to love myself, the more love comes back double fold, which is simply confirming and encouraging me to go to deeper levels of self commitment and love.
My experience is the same Helen, the more I love myself, the more love comes back. This is such a beautiful confirmation and an a opportunity to deepen self commitment and love.
I agree Benkt and feel that loving myself not only helps me be in the world, but is ‘the’ very foundation and essential part of this and everything I do.
Yes Benkt, I’d never really looked at it that way before but it really is a case of feeding love in to get more back. A bit like a bank where the money gains interest, so the love comes pouring back the more we let it flow out. The opposite of this is when we get stuck in the negative and are critical or judgmental, nothing good ever comes from this, everything we do creates a ripple effect so the question is what kind of ripple do we want to put out there spreading across the world?
I love to hear “Re” in anything that’s presented, tells us there’s nothing new to learn and no pressure, we must already know everything deeply, we just have not used it or haven’t wanted to !!
Stronger I have become in my resolve to not dismiss myself but to listen open heartedly to all that is presented – this builds my self worth daily, brick by brick I rebuild the strength of me.
I adore these two sentences “I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” I was deeply touched when I read the sentences, and I know this to be true from my own lived experience. There is deep wisdom shared here in this article, and it is not for the ‘chosen few’ it is accessible to everyone, learning to self care and self love opens a door to an ageless wisdom and the opportunity to live with love. Thank you for your expression of deep appreciation it is an inspiration and a joy to read.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” I can really relate to this sentence. For me that is also what has been reflected back to me when I love and respect myself, my love is confirmed and reflected back to me allowing an even deeper level of Love to be nurtured.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth. I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” Fantastic Dragana this paragraph needs to be the back bone to all education for what good is any intelligence if we do not have self love?
Fabulous. I so agree with you samanthaengland.” What good is any intelligence if we do not have self-love?”. I know for myself that I learned the most from the teachers who met me in my self worth and self love and nurtured this part of me and allowed it to flourish and grow.
I love Kyla’s raw and honest blog too Dragana. The detail you go into about your journey to fully realise how amazing you are is very universal and I can relate deeply.
Dragana I love what you share “The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth”. This is so beautiful and so true. The more we honour, respect and love ourselves, the more the universe confirms back to us our worth. It has to start from within us.
Re-learning our self worth would have to be the no. 1 priority for us all and this in turn has a magical influence on everything we do and everybody we meet.
I becoming more and more known with the love that I am, I can feel how much I have and still do hurt myself with not truly honouring who I am and what I can bring in this world.
Dragana, the difference for me with reconnecting to self love through Universal Medicine and Esoteric Women’s Health was that I was not listening to theory – it was shared with me from those who live it and that in itself was inspiring because I may have given up on the possibility of even feeling good about myself. Yet, here were these people living it and inspiring (not telling!) others on this much needed subject. If they could do it, so could I.
Hello Dragana, this statement stood out for me, “The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth. I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” By fully committing to a life long love affair with ourselves we actually commit to a life long love affair with humanity. Its very beautiful.
I remember Serge Benhayon saying to me “Do self worth to the bone”, and those words have stuck with me ever since. I used to have this notion that it was selfish to put yourself first and that we got what we deserved and lets face it, if you have low self worth then your’e not going to set your sights very high.
Learning to self love and appreciate what we can bring to the world is a game changer, for us and everyone around us.
Thanks for sharing the saying from Serge, Julie, ‘do self worth to the bone’, it struck a chord with me, I had felt like you, it was selfish to put yourself first and if things started to get too good or too amazing in my life I would find a way to bring it back down to a level that was comfortable and did not make me stand out too much. Learning to appreciate myself and that I am worth it is on going as I discard all the old belief systems that held me back from allowing and expressing my true worth
Being there just for others and not for ourselves is huge for women. The fact that we feel guilt for cherishing ourselves in thought and in practical ways is so very wrong, because we all equally flourish with self love. Somehow self love has been seen as a luxury for a special few instead of a basic necessity for all.
Absolutely – there is such a common preconception that ‘self-love’ is an indulgent, selfish act. When in fact it is the most selfless thing you can possibly do, because “being there for others” when we are not “there for ourselves” makes any of our actions devoid of any true love and thus of zero service to those we may think we are helping. If we love ourselves first then we will bring true service to others. Thus, self-love is the first and most important part of service to others. The polar opposite of the common preconception.
Thank you Julie, Dragona and all the other commentators on this blog, what a power-full message I get when I read “Do Self-Worth To The Bone”! Absolute magic, thank you Julie I needed to reread this blog and comments again to get to this amazing aspect of what was presented to you by Serge Benhayon.
We would not dare to speak to anyone in the way we can speak to ourselves. Sometimes when I let my thoughts go to observe where I am at, I now can laugh about the ridiculous of what I’m telling myself. I’m starting to see that no one, absolutely no one benefits from talking to myself as if my head needs to be cut off because of what I have been doing so wrong. As you say so beautifully Dragana I too am becoming aware that I love life, that life loves me back and that life wants me to nurture myself.
This is a really profound piece, I am sure I have read it before but this time I am in a different place within myself and are starting to allow more love out and in, I really understood what you have shared about your relationship with love and self worth, what you are setting for a standard with yourself and then how life reflects that – amazing. Thank you.
What you say Dragana about how we can talk to ourselves at times and if this were coming from another we would say goodbye is very true. I loved reading this in this way as it brings more of a reality to the harm we are doing to ourselves when this happens and is an invitation to take better notice. Thank you.
I feel a great way to expose the harm of our self criticism and judgement is to ask myself would I say this to a precious 5 year old and if I did what would her response be. The devastation it can cause is then instantly visible. I can feel the self-destruction in this behaviour as well as the deliberateness of bringing ourselves down to not have to step up and stand out in utter glory.
Carolien, that is an interesting comment about the “deliberateness of bringing ourselves down to not have to step up and stand out in our utter glory.” For me when I read this I can feel that I do know the power of self appreciation but to not live this appreciation is a tool that helps me to continue to keep people out and play a game of separateness and self protection.
Thank you Melinda for reminding me of this, as I find I easily forget that as you say, I know the power of appreciating myself. I will actively choose it for today!
“I feel a great way to expose the harm of our self criticism and judgement is to ask myself would I say this to a precious 5 year old and if I did what would her response be.” This is great. I shall be more tender with myself and others if I allow this kind of awareness. Also by continually reconnecting to my body I can stay honest and potentially true to myself.
Re-learning self worth is a huge undertaking. Firstly becoming aware of where and when we put ourselves in the position of lack self worth and then realising that old patterns and behaviours have no place in our sense of self worth. The undertaking to recognise who we truly are for ourselves and others is magical and with the support of Universal Medicine and Esoteric Practitioners, it becomes a loving journey.
I agree Janne – it is a huge undertaking but I feel this is something we all want to be able to do – to feel that deep love for ourselves that is unshakeable – I know it’s true of me. So much of how I’ve felt about myself has come from how I feel others perceive me rather than how I feel about myself. Learning to appreciate myself is a work in progress and a worthwhile one.
So true Janne, it is key to firstly become aware of where and when we put ourselves in the position of lack of self worth, then seeing and feeling the old patterns/behaviours. I find that can be the chicken and egg, the patterns/behaviours kick in so automatically, they keep us safe and what we are used to. Even if they are painful and not supportive, we can keep using them, behaving in a way because its what we know. So building awareness, so we can then make other choices, learn new pathways and ways of being, are key and I agree can be magical when they unfold.
Relearning self worth is for me appreciating me as an individual with my natural gifts and qualities. Accepting and cherishing the individual expression I bring and deepening the connection to the Love I am.
Reconnecting to and developing an appreciation of my own self worth is just like you Dragana an ongoing work in progress. That you share self worth is actually both a noun and a verb takes it to yet another level for me to deepen to.
Beautifully said, Dragana, and what I find so divine about it is the fact that the worth for yourself and life can forever deepen. What has been an act of self-worth two years ago might not serve life or me anymore today. Then this can be a marker to celebrate, how far I have come.
So true and important felixschumacher8: celebrating all the steps we have taken and steadily continue to open up to what more is there to be discovered, looked at and implemented into our lives.
Universal Medicine introduced me to the concept of self-worth for who I am not for what I do and I am learning to appreciate myself and have an ever deepening sense of self-worth for the woman I am. The beauty of this is that by dropping the self judgement and self criticism this naturally has extended to others and I appreciate them for who they are rather than assessing their worth by what they have done or are doing.
That ‘judgement’ you talk about is so brutal and detrimental. I have been really feeling this recently. It kinda kills me in two ways. Firstly, and perhaps the most obviously, it chops me down and messes with my self-worth. That, I knew about and can easily see. What I have also noticed is how judgement is actually a very clever way of me not seeing the full truth of what is at play. By judging myself, or others, I have put a ceiling on my understanding of the situation, of me, or of them. I have made a judgement, and that is that – which then prevents me from seeing or feeling further into what might be going on. It stops me from understanding. And without understanding there can be neither evolution or equality.
And there is more to it than that. I can actually and actively use ‘judgement’ to protect myself from seeing the full picture. As I have said, judgement finishes the ‘dialogue’ , it shuts the door, ends the conversation. So what if we actually use judgement as a comfort blanket, to protect ourselves from seeing the whole.
absolutely Otto, I have come to see the same. Judgement is an instant separation from others and even myself. In separation there is no way we can see all that is there to be seen and felt and it is a perfect way of protecting myself. I have come to see that protection is much more about what I do not wish to acknowledge and see in the world then it is from getting ‘wounded’ by what others are doing or saying. What I do not wish to see is much more about accepting the responsibility for the full picture that I have allowed to be.
Ottobathurst this is beautiful about judgment putting “a ceiling on your understanding of a situation”. Deep down I can feel we all really do want to understand. Understanding is like an open extended hand, and judgement is like the coldness of someone turning their back.
You are right Melinda. You describe it as “someone turning their back.” And when we judge ourselves that is what we are doing, we are turning our back on ourselves. But this immediately brings up an image for me of a child who is being told off and doesn’t want to hear the truth of their actions..so they turn their back and try and block it out. My point being that when we judge ourselves, that is what we are doing – we are actively choosing not to feel the deeper truth of our choices.
I just realised that my worth equals who I truly am and this is untouched and unchangeable. If I can feel who I am within me and commit to staying with that, this will offer the opportunity for my choices to be naturally loving and honouring of what I have just felt.
Which then evolves it into being deliciously normal and obvious; the ‘not loving’ sticking out like a huge, throbbing sore thumb.
I love that Otto, especially the words ‘deliciously normal’, this breaks the idea of normal being plain, blend, or flat even, whereas the normal of our naturally loving ways are indeed nothing short of delicious. And anything that feels less could as you say only stick out.
“I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago”. I can relate to this as I know how critical I have been of myself in the past. Relearning self-worth by being tender and nurturing towards myself, has helped me to let go of those lack of self worth issues and I wholeheartedly thank the Universal Medicine practitioners for being there to support me on my never ending journey back to my true essence – love.
Love this Dragana and the confirmation that it is in the activity of re-learning to self-worth that we appreciate that we are truly worthy of love. This has been huge for me and is an ongoing process that expands the more I allow it. Just yesterday I had yet another awareness that ‘the love for self comes first’ and it is only by committing to build that in myself that I have the solid foundation to let go of comparison with others and therefore have more of me to share with everyone else untainted by all the outer constructs that have kept me small for so long.
Great to read your article Dragana, ‘ I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfilment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.’ Beautiful. I felt this yesterday and today, having been inspired by the women in livingness group yesterday, i felt a deep connection and love for myself, washing myself and getting ready this morning in a deeply caring and nurturing way, touching myself tenderly and lovingly as I got ready for the day, I felt the absolute loveliness and beauty of me. I love the words enjoying a lifelong love affair particularly and can feel how there is then no place for lack of self worth.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.” Dragana these words melted me, I felt the truth of them and then the realisation that if I don’t nurture myself then I am saying no to God, no to life; and only harm can come from that, for me and all others.
It’s amazing isn’t it that our life is set up with such an absence of true self worth, self love and nurturing, yet when we align to these things we feel completely in flow with life. I feel we have lived so disconnected from love that we cannot even feel anymore that the entire fabric of the universe is this love, as is the very space around us that holds us. How disconnected must we be from the truth about life when we have walked so far away from love?
Re-learning to self-worth (verb!) is an ongoing one for me. From a low base to begin with it is only since discovering Universal Medicine that I have come to accept and now learn to appreciate and yes, love myself. I sometimes wondered how I have got through such a large chunk of my life without any self esteem, but realised it was when I had a role that I was fine. It was the ‘just being me’ I found hard to appreciate.
Well said Dragana: “I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!” I use this way of observing how I treat myself too and it really helps to let go off the harsh way I have been and sometimes still am with myself. I would never treat another harshly yet I could do it to myself.
The notion of self-worth being a verb is a gift for my day. Thank you. It is a super important distinction because, for me at least, it emphasises the fact that it is a constant and ever-available CHOICE for which I have full responsibility. It stops it being a goal. It makes it a living, breathing rhythm. Beautiful. I am going to carry it with me, verbing it.
The discovery of ‘…not only do I love life, but that life loves me back’ helps me understand what is going on when I don’t want to get out of bed to face the day. There is a struggle and a resistance, this is from not taking the time to really love myself, as I am, knowing my full worth. Life is always loving us back, it’s just a matter of us seeing and appreciating it for the blessing it constantly brings.
Ahhhh self-worth – something until recently I had not even considered, but through the support of all of the esoteric practitioners you have named there is a feeling in me of love and warmth and strength and contentment and the realisation that I can live with this 24/7 if I choose and anything that does not leave me feeling this way is not of Love. Simple!
Self worth was something I came to understand when I met Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon. I was brought up in doing for others and loving others, that thing about self was never an option. I never loved myself or put myself before another. I had not realised how exhausted I had become by doing for others and being caught up in ideas and beliefs. When I started to understand true self worth, the ideas and beliefs started to drop off, I was able to say NO, without feeling bad. I started to self nurture and self honour. I started to understand when I look after me first then I am truly their for others.
Amazing comment Amita, like yourself when I finally let go of sacrificing myself to live for others, and began living life focused on myself and restoring my own self love in every choice (oh, and the joy I felt as I began this!) everyone around me began to also go through many positive changes. This astonished me at first but I realised how truly beneficial and nurturing I was by simply embodying love. It also gave others the space to simply be with themselves and care for themselves as my need to be needed was a kind of imposition. No matter what our minds tell us, love works. The best way to show others love is to live it ourselves.
This is true for me too Dragana, ‘Re-learning to self-worth has been a huge piece of my work and it is still in progress’. When I started to attend Universal Medicine events my self-worth was incredibly low, I found it hard to talk to anyone and even look anyone in the eye, group work was painful for me, but developing a relationship with myself and starting to appreciate myself and my qualities has changed this. I now have much more self worth and actually enjoy group work and connecting with people.
I just loved reading of your journey to explore the power in deepening your relationship with yourself, and how the deeper this love for yourself grew, your worth was affirmed by the Universe. This is just so gorgeous Dragana, you make committing to loving and nurturing us in a lifelong love affair with ourselves, an enormously inspired and beautiful way to live.
Heartfelt thanks from me too.
The topic self-worth was a big topic in my life, I was caught up in a victim role for a long time. Thanks to Universal Medicine and the practitioners I’m able to let go of all the issues and I understand more and more, that I have created the issues to avoid my own light, my own glory. Now I’m able to make new choices and the choice to connect to my light.
Dragana, reading this blog ignites a deep appreciation and love for me and all equally. Thank you.
Thanks for writing this Dragana, I feel a kind of reassurance coming from your blog to persevere with my self love as it is definitely something that needs constant work and attention to get to the point where there is absolutely no self-worth issues.
For me, the trick is that the self-love becomes a lived way, a joyous expression, an everyday rhythm. It is when I am holding it as a thing that I must do, need to do, should do, that I so easily drop it. It’s a big switch when it goes from ‘something I must do’ to ‘why would I not do it’. And for me that is supported by appreciation and acceptance. Appreciation of how gorgeous it feels and how amazing I am to commit to it…and acceptance of the huge changes it has made to my life, my expression and my relationships.
This is gorgeous Otto and it reminded me of the fact that as soon as self worth becomes a ‘thing’ or a ‘doing’ it no longer is that, it then becomes another way of rejecting myself because I am in that moment saying I am not that already. So the every day learning and building for me is in the connecting to and feeling of who I truly am, and as you say Otto appreciating this in all its aspects.
You bring a really strong next level to this. The most self-loving thing we can do is fully appreciate and accept into every cell of our body that we already are everything that we are “trying/doing” to be.
Yes ottobathurst, to turn the question around and say “why would I not” makes it seem so illogical. The life changes are true medicine.
Ottobathurst, what if self love was something that already existed within us that we simply choose to connect to and live from everyday, or something that we deny or move away from? What if it is already who we are, and we choose to move with it or against it?
Melinda. Your comment makes it even clearer and exposes even more the absurdity of the “doing” of the “should” of the “try” of any of those external pursuits of something that is, as you absolutely nail, not just inside of us, it is simply who we are. Self love is as natural as breathing.
“… this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” This is beautiful Dragana and it is one of the most rewarding love-affairs we can have, as it builds our own self-worth and helps us to evolve to greater awareness and love beyond what we deem possible.
Ah Dragana, your love is divine, and worthy of shouting across the rooftops of the world. Thank you.
And such simplicity in what you say. After reading your blog, self-worth feels much less like and “issue” – which to me as connotations of a laborious journey of self-analysis and the like. Your words change that. It becomes an expression, a choice, a lived activity that can be embraced and embodied whatever space I might be in. It is no longer a destination, it is a NOW.
Otto thanks for this reminder which is so pertinent for me this morning as I re-commit to this as an activity ‘a lived activity that can be embraced and embodied whatever space I might be in. It is no longer a destination, it is a NOW.’
Ottobathurst, at last someone nails the true power of now! 🙂
The issue of self-worth is so huge isn’t it Dragana, and laced very finely into every aspect of human life. It’s only when we start to love ourselves (and more) do we find (all) the areas, times or experiences where we’ve not held an inner or true worth at all, but instead a sense worth that has been derived from external components like a partner, a job, title, salary, salary, material wealth, our looks and so on. The more we get rid of those external components, the more we develop a true worth. And this is worth everything.
I agree Zofia, it is finely ingrained in our society and upbringing. The external components have caught us all for generations. It is so freeing to peel it back and discover who we are.
Why is self-worth such an issue for us, why have we lost contact with the precious self we are? Although I do not have the immediate answer to that right now I do confirm that the more I connect to the love I am, the more I see and feel the refection of the same love coming back to me that confirms me in where I am truly from, feeding my self-worth from the inside out instead of how I used to live in the past feeding my lack of self-worth from the outside in.
Could it be that our issue with self-worth is fed to us from the outside world, that tels us how we should be in order to be recognised and accepted by society and could it be that this is happening because we have at any point in life given up on ourselves and started to make ourselves dependant on others instead of to rely on our inner selves and beauty, our worth of self? How lost have I been realising that the self-worth has always been there in my inner most. I have chosen to contract from this and have chosen for a lesser life in order to ‘fit in’ with how the outer world wanted me to behave in order to not rock the boat and to allow me to belong to a group in society.
It is incredible what we will do in order to ‘fit in’. It’s brilliant that not only has self-worth been deeply covered by Serge and Natalie Benhayon, but acceptance and recognition has also been exposed for all it’s traps and short comings. Finding our way back to our inner most, where all our truth lies, exposes all of this and allows us to re-build a relationship with our own worth, and the preciousness that lies innately within us all. Gorgeous.
I agree Jo, it is a true responsibility of all The Students of The Livingness to bring the teaching of how amazing we all can be as does Dragona, Serge and Natalie Benhayon who are sharing about ‘Self-Worth’ along with many other Self-Loving presentations!
‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself’
I love the way you express yourself Dragana. The truth is always so beautiful to feel ✨
I loved the line Dragana, that not only do you love life, but life loves you back and wants to you nurture yourself. I feel this too – when I nurture myself consistently as part of my daily rhythm, life does love me back – it’s a spherical reflection. Love in, love out, love back.
Dragana what resonated most with me were these lines “The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth. I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” This feels like such a beautiful and confirming way to live.
So true…………..’from inside out, and not from outside in’. So simple really. Thank you Dragana for sharing your discovery in your blog and bringing this love to us all.
“The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth” I love this sentence and also feel the power of the reflection we can offer to others equally.
Francisco, this resonates deeply for me also, and the days I allow that love as my being, the grander the Universe (and I as an essential part of it) become. This unfolds a greater understanding of who we all are and carry within, and what we can bring as a reflection for each other… it just gets better and better…
It is so easy to overlook ourselves and not give ourselves the same level of love as we would give to others. By deepening the relationship with self and appreciating ourselves, we can truly love another. Thanks for your sharing Dragana.
I have met many guys over the years that would give you the shirt off their back if you needed it but these same guys treat themselves with very little if any care at all. Yes it is a kind gesture but when it comes at the expense of another than there is no real care being offered.
Awesome tonysteenson, you and Dragona, have opened a can of worms so to speak. I have played the game of being the nice guy with looking and being the so called, ‘kind gesture’ type, doing the good deeds and trying to please others all to hide the fact that I was lost and felt empty inside. Why the can of worms? Because this blog and comment have brought me to a greater and deeper level of awareness to self-worth as an issue that has been so easily swept under the carpet. The realisation that has come about from reading and connecting to the words and not hiding in the illusion and saying that I am okay where I am at. Let the healing begin that will bring self-worth to all I do, not in parts or fragments for this only deepens the illusion and increases the lack of self-worth, but in full, with understanding and forever expanding presence of that bringing about true healing.
What is empty inside? It is many things, such as the striving for recognition through the ‘kind gesture’, pushing to over achieve, hiding sadness through being angry, living in disregard, being depressed, using drugs, using sex, cutting, over eating, eating to satisfy a taste sensation or just using food to numb ourself and there is a myriad of other things that disconnect us to not feel the emptiness which is a longing to be re-connected to God. That’s right I will say it again we justify and do what ever to not feel the ‘empty-ness’ from the “disconnect” from GOD. The releasation of the fact that I have to deal with and looked at so many of these issues, and with a willingness to continue to evolve so I can now live a life that takes full responsibility for all I do, because of this, undertaking my Livingness has become such a joy and all of this is thanks to the presentations of Serge Benhayon.
What you share tonysteenson is so true. Giving someone the shirt of your own back is a principle that sounds loving but ultimately isn’t as healthy as it appears for it is just like you spending all of your time and effort stoking and caring for someone else’s fire while you let your own burn out.
I feel like the journey of self worth may be never ending which is fine, because as it turns out i am quite an interesting and amazing person to get get to know, it just seems to have taken a little while to figure that out. iI seems the more I discover about my self the more there is still to uncover. Each step reveals another exciting and sometimes puzzling aspect about myself. It is definitely worth nurturing this relationship with myself.
I love your cheekiness! Yes the long road of exploring our relationship with ourselves is worth it as there is always more to discover and more to share with others. I can feel I need to actively appreciate my worth and specific qualities, so they can be actively felt in my body, by myself and those around me.
There is always more to express, each expression unlocks another..
Hi Mary I am sure you are not alone in
Hi Mary, I can relate to what you have shared here when I said “It has taken me a little while to figure it out”, I can say that there was a time where I asked how could I have been so loveless, and felt immense sadness at the choice to walk away from myself, and I still can, but each time I asked that question from a place of deep appreciation, that I even could ask that question it became easier, and the healing happened more quickly. The more responsibility I take to heal things that aren’t working, rather than waiting for them to break and then fix it, has really changed the way I feel about the process. For me learning who we are, has meant working through what we are not.
I always felt Mary that certain things were not attainable for me.I was never quite enough. Now I am beginning to feel that these things were just that, things. Things that I don’t need. And that I am enough, enough for me.It doesn’t just stop there, because as I change, evolve and grow, me gets more, so my enough has to grow too. Its sometimes ‘two steps forward and one step back’, but I can feel my enough spilling out for others too.
I love your comment nicolesjardin The journey of self worth is interesting and amazing isn’t it.. The journey of self discovery and forever deepening love.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth. I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” Beautiful Dragana. My self-worth issues have been slowly dissolving since discovering Universal Medicine and I am re-connecting with the love I have inside of me, not just for myself but for everyone.
I agree Adam, but the reality is most of us have struggled with self-worth in one way or another. Dragana, I love how you say, by deepening our love for ourselves ‘this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfilment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in’. So beautiful and so true.
It seems crazy to think that we need to work at rediscovering self worth as though it is something that is not natural to us.
Thanks Dragana I love the title of this blog, and learning to self-worth has been an ongoing journey for me which has unfolded lovingly the more I am willing to look at the ways that I have been unloving and downright abusive to myself in the past. I also love this beautiful reminder: ‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.’
This is a pearl of wisdom Dragana. What you write at the end, that the deeper the love for yourself the more God and everything around you confirms your self-worth is a truth that should be known to all. We are made to be self-loving, deeply so and when we open up our hearts to ourselves everything in our life rearranges itself so that our love can continuously deepen.
So much to ponder on going deeper on this topic of self love and appreciation , and learning for me to see the patterns that play out from old hurts and a lack of appreciation self supporting and self loving can set the stage for as Jonathon said being my own worst critic and then hardest task master rather than loving supportive friend. It is amazing to feel how self care, love and appreciation is the bridge back to who we really are.
Thank you Dragana for expressing so clearly what is and what is so important about ‘self-worth’. The line that stands out for me is, ” I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!” We are own worst critic and I know that in my self-criticism I can be unloving or unsupportive.
Dragana – I loved your comment “I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago.” This brought me to a sharp awareness of the insidious self-destruction we can carry on relentlessly day after day, and in that also accept a measure of this putting down from others. But this just serves to perpetuate a world of hurt and is deeply harming. It is a great reminder that there is different way and to never accept less than total love and support from myself and equally only love and respect from another.
Very true Annie. There is an insidious self-destructive pattern that I have been allowing for years which includes tolerating what I know deep down is neither nurturing nor allowing of the grandness that I am inside and am capable of living. I am grateful for all of those who reflect the teachings of Universal Medicine supporting me to bring this deep knowing more into my conscious awareness and into my daily life.I am also grateful of the encouragement to deepen my development, appreciation and honouring of who I truly am towards a “A lifelong love affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” Thank you Dragana. A great reminder and confirmation.
Wohoo Dragana – that’s a true declaration of love to yourself. And therefore a very inspiring blog to read*
A love affair with myself – it was natural when I was little – what happened? It’s been great with enormous thanks to Serge and Universal Medicine to be confirmed that the way many things in this world are set up, are done in a way that asks you to seek outside yourself, therefore discouraging the already brilliant and amazing everything inside that we are. Rebuilding this deeply loving, tender and amazing connection and relationship to myself is the absolute answer to all my woes. Thank you Dragana for the insight and inspiration to take this deeper.
Lack of Self worth is perhaps one of our greatest un-named diseases. It is not genetic, nor gender specific, nor lifestyle related. It affects nearly all, and has many, many side effects, too many to name here. And, it cause is simple – a lack of connection. Thank you for the timely reminder Dragana. I really needed this reminder this morning.
Your blog does confirm what I am working on. Until not that long ago I thought I needed someone else to feel loved, seeking it outside of me but having a love affair with me sounds so much better than searching for it outside of me.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.” I had this exact feeling this morning and reading this blog has just reminded me of that moment. Part of learning to build my own self-worth has been about choosing to be aware of all the things that I do, say, think in the day that is not self-loving or self-regarding. But now I feel like I am on the tip of an iceberg that says ‘Feel how you feel about yourself – your true self’ and this line simply nailed it. Thank you Dragana.
Of course Self-worth is a Verb, it is something we build confirm in our action and not a noun, a static state that we either have or don’t have… Amazing insight into how we’ve constructed it wrong. Thanks Dragana
‘life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.’ Your experience completely debunks any belief that life is about suffering and hardship. We were not born to suffer!
Deep down I know if I choose a life based on self-love and nurturing, if I let go of the struggle and surrender, life will support me in this, and more.
Growing up, babies always used to impress me – how could they ever be at ease when they were so dependent? I’d be an anxious wreck I thought if I was put into a baby’s body. But actually they are connected to themselves and God so know, no matter what happens, it is all ok. They are bundles of love.
Great blog Dragana, thank you. I love how you describe self -worth as a ‘life-long love “affair” which brings the fulfilment & contentment from inside out, and not from outside in’. I am also working on deepening my appreciation of myself, and it feels great to be connecting with myself in this way.
“I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!” thanks for this wonderful piece of wisdom Dragana, I will keep this in mind, it’s so great!
Dragana – I really relate to what you say here about talking to ourselves in a way we would not allow anyone else too.
It’s pretty crazy how easily we can cut ourselves down by the smallest remark that is full of hate.
I have been exploring the verb of self-worth – and it certainly means stopping that voice and bringing more appreciating back.
Love your article, Dragana. ‘I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!’ – so honest, the hard hitting truth and something I can totally relate to. I have put such high, completely unattainable, expectations on myself and then berated myself for not being good enough. Acknowledging that I would NEVER speak to another in this way highlights to me how very abusive I have been, to myself. I have always had everything that I need to be and it’s been there waiting for me to make the choice to connect and give myself a very big hug.
“A love affair with self”, Dragana these five words are so very power-full and your blog is so full of love and understanding for all too. Thank you for the reminder to love, appreciate and accept continually.
Realising that the key to my self-worth was that any love I was to receive had to firstly come from me has been a huge learning curve, and the more I nurture and care for myself means I naturally then feel more love from and for others.
It’s so true that if another spoke to me the way I used to speak to myself, they would not be in my life. It is so interesting that I allowed that for so long not even stopping to question where it was coming from. Now, with the inspiration of the Benhayons and many who have blazed the path of self worth and self love before me, I can step up to truly love myself and my foundation gets stronger each day. This is awesome. This is not just empty words spoken to myself as some kind of mantra, although at the start it was so unfamiliar that sometimes it felt so, this has become a true and lasting feeling of worth that then extends to everyone else in a real and enriching way.
I love your blog Dragona. If you could only teach your child one thing, it would have to be Self-Worth.
This is such a beautiful blog Dragana, thank you. Life does want us to nurture ourselves and loves us back when we do.
Thank you Dragana for writing this, self worth is something I have not nailed yet, it comes and goes – so it is great to read this blog, and have the reminder I am worth love. And there is no need to be hard on myself, as that just perpetuates the lack of self worth. We have all been offered an amazing opportunity and blessing from Serge Benhayon, God and Universal Medicine – to work through, let go of everything that is not us, all the ideals and beliefs we have taken on through the ages, and come back to a way and being that is love. Sometimes it can feely hard but really it is an absolute blessing and gift from God. I am much more aware of so many things than I used to be, or would allow myself to be, before meeting Serge Benhayon.
Thanks Dragana, It can be a huge journey back to self love ,self appreciation and acceptance of the true awesomeness of what we really are , but saying that it doesn’t have to be if we can let go of all the negative conditioning and hurts . Sometimes we hold onto the old for comfort and familiarity like putting on an old jacket that we used to love with all its memories even though it doesn’t fit properly now and is out of style.
I like the picture of the old jacket a lot, because it illustrates so well, how those old memories and attachments we have completely mask the fact that the jacket is not only out of style and ragged, but masking so much of the beauty that is us. Its like dressing down instead of joyfully dressing up in celebration of ourselves.
It is so true Dragana that we can at times be very self-abusive with such an inner dialogue that clearly displays a lack of self-love. Therefore that’s a great place to start, love thy self and not accept any thing less.
A timely reminder for me of how far I have come. Thank You Dragana for sharing about Self Worth. What a huge subject for most of us as we always look outside of us to get what we want because something is ‘missing’ inside.
I spent years feeling worthless, I grew up in an indian family where girls were clearly not wanted and you we told this – that was how our culture was.
I only started to grasp what self worth is when I came to the work and teachings of Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon. My re-interpretation and mis-interpretation of what was being presented about self worth made me think it was all about ticking boxes and things would change at the core inside me. No chance.
It was after attending every single Esoteric Women’s presentations with Sara Williams, that I finally got it and even today I would say I am a “work in progress” when it comes to self worth. There is more and for me right now it is about Appreciating who I am, what I bring to this world and the feeling that I am equal to ALL others. Not just in my head but actually feeling this in my body.
I like this idea, Dragana, of how we would not let another person get away with treating us as badly as we treat ourselves. In my experience I have hurt myself with abusive behaviours, self doubt, self criticism, guardedness and protection far more than others have hurt me. And perhaps acknowledging this is the first step back to having more self-worth? It certainly stopped me blaming everything I did not like about my life on others and the world.
This blog was a real confirmation of a conversation l had recently about self worth. I came to the realisation, although I always knew that I had a real lack of it. On trying to remember where this self worth problem had come from or how long it had been around, I just did not know. Its like it has just always been there or been round for a very long time.
Where ,why or how does’t seem to matter when you can see a definite way out thanks to all the people Dragana has named and blogs like this, I have absolutely no need to hold on to the past, with self love the way forward may be bumpy but its clear.
Beautifully written Dragana, that self talk is so important, as you point out you would have left another if they spoke to you as you yourself have, I can relate to that and how we are often our own worst enemy in the harming way we can feel about ourselves. Crazy when we realise how transformative it can be to value and cherish ourselves, thus allowing us to build ourselves up, live a life worth living and be a person that everyone can enjoy.
haha Dragana, this bit is just pure gold ‘Thank you Serge Benhayon, Simone Benhayon, Natalie Benhayon and Sara Williams from the depths of that amazing muscle organ which pumps blood throughout the body.’ loved it. You’ve just helped me realize that when I’m wanting a relationship because I’m wanting to be cuddled it all comes down to the level of self worth that I don’t have at that point in time. So, thank you for reiterating what Kyla said about all of us”‘who have experienced similar things – craving love, touch, appreciation, connection – and not knowing my own self-worth”.
Beautiful Dragana, I can so relate to how you described realising how you talk to yourself – and that you wouldn’t tolerate that from another. I’ve realised recently just how harsh I can be on myself in ways that can be quite subtle or sneaky in getting through. Nailing this self-judgment is so imperative for clearing out the old hardness that holds me back from being loving and nurturing – as you so beautifully describe here. Thank you for the reminder to only speak to myself in the way that I would to a gorgeous young baby – as that is the marker of tenderness and love that I too require.
Thank you Dragana, I love this line as I too “used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!” When I become aware of this, I call out the self abuse as that is exactly what it is and I deserve so much more than that.
Very inspiring blog Dragana and a great reminder. Thank you!
Thanks Dragana. Self-appreciation and learning to not settle for less than I deserve is a work in progress, but every self-loving choice builds confidence and allows me to feel the effects of non-loving choices very quickly. I’m now understanding how important it is to self-love thanks to the presentations by Natalie Benhayon and Universal Medicine.
Great blog Dragana, I particularly liked this line “The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” – this is so very true and such a beautiful reminder of how we are always looked after.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.” How glorious and contrary to everything we know – that the deeper we love ourselves, we begin to truly see that god is everywhere.
I’m with you Anna- ” A love affair with self – what a beautiful choice to make.”
Thanks Dragana, self worth is definitely worth re-learning and re-building in our lives. These simple words can have a profound effect on our entire life and are quite miraculous in its result.
Thanks Dragana. This line stood out to me…
‘This made me aware how I used to think that I should accept and settle down with what I thought I deserved’.
How often do we override our worth by justifying with our minds ‘what we think we deserve or should accept’. And so we settle because we tell ourselves that this is as good as it’s going to get – or, that we should stop complaining, or that we are doing something wrong… we justify away!
However, this now sets off warning bells to me, because our worth is beyond measure. How can we limit our limitless Divine value with the notion of ‘deserving’ or ‘settling’?? Why do we constrict ourselves with the idea of needing to be ‘good enough’ in order to be loved?
I love that you now see the infinite depth of love you can hold yourself in – with no limit, no compromise and no measure.
‘How do we constrict ourselves with the idea of needing to be ‘good enough’ in order to be loved?’ Thank you Dragana and Kylie – you have expressed how we place conditions on self-love, we are not worthy of it, we believe we have to earn it. The tricks we play out and fall for are endless; when it’s as simple as – I am incredible and divine. And not just that, but we deserve to receive love to; what comes in goes out. The universe wishes us to deeply love ourselves because it in turn can then pump up the love it puts out in return which is of benefit for all of humanity.
Thank you Dragana and Kylie, this has been really awesome for me to read and to feel how to turn this lack of self worth around and how to appreciate in full our own divinity.
I love this Dragana “I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.” I can now honestly say for the first time that I love my life too and appreciate how far I have come in returning to the beautiful woman I am. That is only possible by continuing to build my foundation of self worth and love. Loving every minute of it. Thank you.
The feeling of falling in love – with me – has been the relationship I was always yearning for yet had confused that would be only with another. Without loving myself first I was not ever able to fully feel it from anyone else. Since building the relationship I have with me first, anyone and everyone gets to feel more of me, and the depth of our connection can expand.
Great little blog, straight to the point and a great reminder, that yes, we are all worth our own love.
Awesome you expressed this Dragana. “I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!” I can so relate to this line and observing the people around me and the way the are with themselves shows me I am not the only one… I am now becoming aware that no one really makes me think and talk harshly to myself but that it is me choosing not to love myself. I have been playing around with feeling appreciation for myself instead of negative and harsh talk and it makes a World of a difference. I feel more vital, more joyful and life is just much more fun in this love affair with myself.
And it confirm our worth as the amazing beings that we are!
A great point to make Lieke. When I talk harshly to myself I am choosing not to love my self , in a cold-hearted and unloving way, which can remind me of being reprimanded by my parents when I was a child. That alone is is good reason why we must have unconditional love for our children, to ensure we teach them only love. Thank you.
Awesome blog thank you Dragana, I especially like this line – “I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfillment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in.” –
A love affair with self – what a beautiful choice to make.
Love this too Anna – a love affair with yourself.
Dragana thank you for your inspiring piece. Every time you make a self loving choice the universe confirms this choice as true as you can feel this love returning to you again. I have felt choices we make are magnified they do not just stop at that choice. That is why it’s so worth it to show ourselves the love we deserve as this will expand and ultimately be shared with all others.
Thank you katechorley I love the expansiveness of your comment.
It is so true Dragana, that if I were spoken to in the way I speak to myself I would have said goodbye long ago! Every day it is a learning to appreciate and love me for me and not be so hard on myself.
I love this line Dragana, I can confirm it is so true “I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more God affirms my worth.” I feel God each and everyday.
“I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!” We can be our greatest critic and you have expressed very eloquently here how unloving this is to ourselves. I have discovered that the greatest support I can give myself is to be my own best friend not my worst enemy and the way to be the former is through self-love.
Thank you Dragana, it is so true that love does feed you back – that is, developing ways to make supportive and nurturing choices for yourself confirms just how lovely you truly are. And conversely, the choice to allow negative thoughts, and harsh actions takes you further from this supportive and nurturing place. As always, it is as simple as making a choice in each moment – to love, or not to love 🙂
This beautifully highlights how the quality of how deeply we love ourselves reflects the quality of the loving life we live. We are love and we all deserve to live a truly loving life, with everyone. I have certainly lived a life less than the love that I am and felt that I deserve, but I have now begun to appreciate the tender, loving, exquisiteness that I am and now make loving choices to honor this connection to my divine essence. Thank you Dragana for you gorgeous sharing and powerful reminder that we are love, and nothing less and so we deserve nothing less than true love.
Thank you Dragana – I love self-worth being a verb – something tangible and real to apply in life if and when any self-harshness kicks in. This really is a life long love affair, an enduring one that deepens and deepens.
I love the simplicity of this blog and the truth that it confirms, we are absolutely love, and deserved to be held, spoken to and moved with such deep tender, loving and nurturing care, and that is by ourselves first. What an amazing forever deepening and expanding life long love affair. I love being with myself, and it makes me ask why (as I still do at times) I want to be anywhere else. Which then proves that the checking out, distraction, dulling etc is not me, that something else has come in, or that I am not expressing in full, all of me. As when I do, there is no room for anything else but joy, truth, appreciation and love.
Gosh this is a work in progress for me I am still learning that I am worth loving me. It sounds so simple yet day by day I have to bring focus and presence to the way I am with me in voice, in movement and with everything else.
Thank you Dragana for sharing this. Self-worth and self love can create a foundation of love coming from within rather than looking to the outside to give us what we don’t feel we are worthy of from the inside. Like you said, I too would not allow another to treat me the way I have treated myself at times. It is incomprehensible that we accept this from ourselves rather than ask us to be more loving towards ourselves. Thanks for the inspiration Dragana.
Dragana, the journey to self esteem and love is the most important one we will make this lifetime. It sounds to me that you have got to your destination, or very close to it! Congratulations.
Dragana your words are so solid and full of love for yourself. A fantastic reflection for us all. Thank you.
Thank you Dragana, you have brought a great realization that my quality of self worth was reflecting my capacity to love life and doubting whether life loves me back. By feeling myself truly and connecting to me, has confirmed that I do love life and that life loves me back. It is restoring my self worth.
So true Dragana, this is what I am learning too, the more I love life the more that life loves me back, and the pure simplicity and joy that this brings. Each day is now more enjoyable and I no longer wake up worrying about the day ahead.
It is worth considering the fact that there is not a child born with self worth issues that I have seen. If a baby had self worth issues, it would never be able to learn how to walk. And yet, all do, quite successfully I might add (unless there is a medical reason not to). Failure at this age is not a consideration, or a word, nor is self judgment, or self criticism.
At some point, we all start to question our natural zest for life, as life starts to reject us for one reason or another.
From then on we learn to importance of needing to perform. And so life becomes our stage. But whilst ever we feel the need to perform in order to be seen or to function in life, we cannot ever have true self esteem, for our understanding as to who we truly are is based upon our ability to continually meet the expectations of society and others, but never based on the fact that we are enough as we are, and always have been – deep within.
All human beings crave love, and yet at some point as children we all knew love (unless there was heavy abuse of some sort), and it was not something that was outside us, but within and all around us. And yet, there was this other part to life – the misery, and the dysfunction that did not quite make sense to how we felt inside. Peculiar as it it, we give this part of life more attention as we get older, most often to the point where we forget the magnificence we once knew. That is the tragedy of human existence for most, and yet it need not be so – although to be otherwise takes discipline, awareness, and a willingness to question life and its principles to its very bones, which leads one to question then – what drives life if by its very nature if it does not seem to support the abundance and joy we knew from birth?
Of course, if this leads us to ponder on the nature of life beyond life as we know it…
‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself..’ What a beautiful discovery. Despite al the harshness that we create there is always an abundance of love that calls us and surrounds us, constantly reminding us how absolutely godly and precious we are.
Esther I agree that an abundance of love surrounds us to remind us and that the only thing we have to do is to listen and be aware.
I am still learning to connect to my self-worth. What I have noticed is the more I do things for myself with the intention of nurturing and honouring – the greater my self worth.
I can relate Dragana to a never ending journey of rediscovering my true self-worth. Serge Benhayon and Natalie Benhayon and the many more esoteric practitioners have been an amazing support and inspiration for me to be deeply honest with myself and unpick all the beliefs I had taken on about how I was not worthy of love. It wasn’t always easy but it was so worthwhile and having now reconnected back to my own love, and having this knowing close to me day in, day out is amazing; it’s the foundation on which I stand, and there is no longer a need to seek this love or sense of self-worth from outside of me.
Beautifully expressed Katerina.
Self-worth and equally worth of self is something many of us negate and discount. Talking with our selves in a way that truly values all that we are is paramount in building a steadfast relationship with our soul.
‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself.’ So beautiful, the way the world does constellate to support us when we are connected to ourselves. It’s crazy how it can be really quite hard to make that choice sometimes. I still find that the patterns that have kept me living in another way, still rear their heads.
The richness of our love comes from the warmth of our inner-heart and it seems ridiculous that we don’t know ourselves by this infinite love. Learning our way back to self-worth is learning our way back to the love that we are. Thank you Dragana, another beautiful reminder and reflection…
It is amazing, isn’t it, how our inner dialogue can be one of a quality that we would never use to someone else or allow another to use towards us. It is a dead give away of our relationship with ourselves that I, for a long time, thought was normal. For me the way back to self worth started with changing the inner dialogue and learning that my worth does not come from what I do, but is something that should be natural as I am naturally already, all that I could want to be and so much more.
I can recognise that the way I used to talk to myself was very harsh and unloving and like you, wouldn’t speak to others like that or accept it from others. Now thanks to attending Universal Medicine workshops and having healing sessions with Esoteric Practitioners, I have noticed the harsh self talk has lessened and I can easy spot it now if it creeps in.
I loved what you said about the way we you used to speak to yourself, that if someone were to talk to you like that you walk away. I am so critical and judgemental to myself at times, and that then reflects outwardly in my relationships with others. Thank you Dragana for a beautiful reminder to continue to build self love and care for my precious self.
Great little article Dragana, self worth for me also is huge. Something that I have to work on everyday.
Self worth – so essential for healthy living and yet not so prevalent amongst us humans. I agree, it is not so easy to really love and value oneself, it takes a bit of a helping hand to step away from the old habits and the old beliefs – the ‘not deserving it’, it being ‘unchristian’ and an ongoing range of other obstructions. But once self worth starts to come in, Dragana’s sentence captures it beautifully, ‘the deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth’ – this is so true.
Awareness around self love and making choices to self love and honour self have been life changing indeed. I am however, still learning to bring this into ALL areas of my life. Although, it’s fascinating how the body’s talk gets louder the more we build a body of love and it becomes more difficult to choose what is not Love.
It is true, life does respond and things do change when we start paying attention to what is really going on for us rather than just blindly treading the path of fitting in, conventions and the so-called ‘normal’.
This is something I’m learning Dragana, ‘Love for self comes first’, it has taken me a long time but I’m realising that this is the only way and that if I don’t love and care for, and nurture myself first, then I can get frustrated and anxious because I’m overriding what I feel and because I’m putting others first and their needs above mine; it is getting clearer and clearer to me that this does not work.
To self-worth – I love that verb and have struggled in the not so distant past to truly value all of me – let alone love me. The teachings of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine have supported me to connect more deeply with me and see that I am worthy of loving myself.
I am with you on that one Lee. It was only when I came to the presentations of Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon that I started to understand what true love really is and from there I could start to make choices that truly supported me which in turn started to build true self-worth.
“I now know that slowly but surely this is how I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’ which brings the fulfilment and contentment from inside out, and not from outside in”. This said it all and I absolutely get the description of ‘a life long love affair’. Who wouldn’t want to live this?
Love really does love you back. Funny that! The more I love and care for myself, the more love I feel, the more love I can then share with others.
Beautiful Dragana. To know that this is a lifelong love affair takes off all the pressure and at the same time opens us up to continually discover the depth of love we deserve.
I am working on my lifelong love ‘affair´ as well 🙂 And every step towards it, is amazing…Freeing and fulfilling. Thanks for sharing your story – I can much relate to it!
Ooo Dragana, I so feel you when you say that the more you start honouring yourself you find that the world and life honours you back too. I loved reading this and it was like my body was singing to me each word I read. Thank you for sharing your expression and way of experiencing everything as I’m sure many many others are also getting such a healing as I did from reading your words.
Very important indeed, And as i can feel in reading this how much I still think I need to be something else than I truly am, so not feeling worth enough. This is a continuing pull or push that I need to be more or less than I truly am. And that way not realy deserving true love and joy with myself.
Re-learning to self-worth, this is what I have been working on too. Learning to reconnect to that deeper knowing that I am love, to accept nothing less from myself or others.
Thanks Dragana, I love the part about how you love life and that life loves and confirms you. This felt great to read and something that I have not truly felt into.
Isn’t it amazing to realise that the only thing that determines how much love is in our life is us!! And, that there is no limit to how much love we can have – other than the belief of how much we think we deserve…
A love affair with self I like that thought and can feel how this will deepen how I view myself and others.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. ” I love this statement – As I have developed more love and nurturing for myself I am astounded and the love I have for all people, I can genuinely say I love and am fascinated by people, which is a huge turn a around for someone who was so burnt out that I took a job doing night fill because I didn’t want to deal with people.
‘The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.’ This is a forever deepening process and I observe the more understanding I develop the deeper my love gets towards myself and others.Thank you Dragana for sharing your experience.
Nice one Dragana. I have struggled over the years with self worth and self love and it is also definitely a work in progress for me made so much easier by the people that you have mentioned.
Your comment touched me deeply Kristy.
“I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back” – that is an experience I had made to Dragana. With every self-loving choice and the more I did practice Self-Worth, the more life did ‘love me back’. It was and is a journey for me as well to let this ‘being loved’ really in, let me really feel that I am loved. This is uniting me again with my brothers. A big ‘Thanks’ to Universal Medicine for supporting me here.
Lovely blog Dragana. It feels as though you have developed a strong love of self and now appreciate yourself as the beautiful loving woman that you are.
We often say that we’re ‘a bit tough’ on ourselves, but is that actually true? Is that harshness us at all? As this blog shows Dragana you are precious jewel and a million miles away from self-critique and withering words. Reading your words has reminded me that the same is true for us all. We are all worthy of self-worth.
This is a great point you bring up Joseph, I will feel into where this “a bit tough on ourselves” stuff originates from. As I write this I realise it comes from the ideas and beliefs similar to “we should already know or have done that”, “I am not enough”, “anything less than perfect is not acceptable”, “someone else can do it why can’t I?” and the list goes on. How ridiculous we let this rule us at times.
And learning to communicate in honesty is for me a big contribution to my self worth. If I do not speak the truth, it implodes in me and I start to reject others, but first I reject myself because I hold myself small.
Some great comments here, I particularly like what Danielle has written about rejection and then later dismissing ourselves – this makes sense to me. Thank you Dragana.
Self worth as a verb. I love that.
I too Dragana have used a voice to speak to myself that I would never use towards another, or accept from another (now anyway!) That voice does not belong in this being, and it has no place in my life as to self-worth in every moment.
I so agree that when I am Living my day holding myself in the Love that I Am, caring and nurturing myself in the Love that I Am, life just loves me and I just love life.
Absolutely with you Dragana, in being both awakened and inspired as to what true self-worth is and can be, via the work of Universal Medicine and Esoteric Women’s Health presentations – wow.
Also ‘with you’ in the sense that in my own exploration of what it is ‘to self-worth’ (in the sense of the verb, as you’ve introduced!), that this is an ever-deepening process of truly honouring myself. I learn more about this every day.
My life has already changed dramatically as a result, yet I still feel the call to go deeper, that if I truly feel and know all that I am, I cannot but treat myself with ultimate tenderness, love and respect – this in itself, being no ‘fixed outcome’, for there is always more to feel, acknowledge and honour within. This comes with the knowing of how my relationships with others are then supported to be deeper and carry true and ever-deepening love and meaning also.
Dragana the words “lifelong love affair” has deeply reasonated with me. It’s a beautiful way to view our relationship to ourselves and self worth. It’s the one affair that I am devoted to in this life.
What you say here Eduardo is really special. Our self worth expands exponentially when it is reinforced by the people around us. We need the people around us, we need Universal Medicine. Thank you.
How amazing it is to walk in life alongside people that see much more in you than even yourself and even more amazing to find out that what they feel is for real!
I agree emfeldman, it is too easy to see our negative points before our positive, so having someone constantly reflect the positive can only have one effect on us…and that will always be a positive one!!
Thank you Dragana – our self-worth is reflected back to us in every moment of our day, sometimes this brings me joy other days I have to say ‘yes, I totally bought into that mind game’ – great sharing.
Made me stop… And re-think my approach to self care and self worth. Thank you
Beautiful and inspiring blog Dragana. I love “The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.” I can feel the truth in it. Thank you.
I had not considered that ‘self-worthing’ is a way of living – developing this for myself is a constant choosing and re-learning.
Today I had a discussion with a group of Women about how self worth plays out in our day. I come to realise that self worth is not something that I have to have, it’s not apart of me, and instead it’s just a behaviour that I have developed. Natalie Benhayon shared something about developing a lack of worth or rejection from being dismissed by another, over time the hurt of this leads to us beginning to dismiss ourselves first, which feels even worse then being dismissed by another. This is what I now feel self worth to be, if in my day I dismiss my true feelings, and/or don’t honour or nurture myself in a way I know I truly need, then I feel a deep lack of self worth. So like what is said in this article, the way out of self worth is to nurture and love ourselves throughout our whole day, in the way we each, walk, breath, sleep, and complete anything in our daily rhythm.
What I get from this Danielle Pirera is that we are the ones hurting ourselves more than anything else.. and we are also the ones who can change this!
A particular line in this stood out to me: “how I used to think that I should accept and settle down with what I thought I deserved”. While I have never felt more deserving of love then ever before in my adult life I can still see areas in life where I am accepting ways of being with myself that are less than what I know to be acceptable. Loving my life means to love all the parts in which I am living and since I don’t stop living in any point of my day then there is always room to accept and appreciate myself to a greater depth.
‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.’ It makes so much sense Dragana. I have started my love affair from inside out … it is as you say.
This is a great blog. I broke up with myself years ago because of the way I spoke to myself! 🙂 ‘Separated’ from me by that awful lack of self worth.
Fortunately like you, I had the support of many Universal Medicine practitioners and friends to allow myself to see the patterns and hurts that supported that behaviour and to get to know the me who would never criticise or judge. You could say I began dating myself again and could describe this developing of self love as ‘falling in love’ (with me) and in the process finding that this has exponentially increased the amount of love and acceptance, true connection and appreciation I now have for others. It is an ongoing process, there is no end to our ever increasing capacity to LOVE.
This is a great blog. I broke up with myself years ago because of the way I spoke to myself! 🙂 ‘Separated’ from me by that awful lack of self worth.
Fortunately like you, I had the support of many Universal Medicine practitioners and friends to allow myself to see the patterns and hurts that supported that behaviour and to get to know the me who would never criticise or judge. You could say I began dating myself again and could describe this developing of self love as ‘falling in love’ (with me) and in the process finding that this has exponentially increased the amount of love and acceptance,true connection and appreciation I now have for others. It is an ongoing process, there is no end to our ever increasing capacity to LOVE.
Thank you Dragana, this is very beautiful. I too have been developing my own love affair with self and have found that there is no limit to the amount of love that can be developed…every day, every moment gives an opportunity to take love to a deeper level. I am also finding the more I love myself the more open and loving I am with others which then gives them permission to be more open and loving in that moment too. This is so beautiful as I am now seeing that self love actually isn’t for me it is for all equally. To love and live in this way confirms we are all connected and how our choices affect the all. I am deeply appreciative of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine for teaching how to re-connect to our inner essence and always presenting the truth about love.
Yesterday I attended the very amazing Girl to Woman Festival in Lennox Head, Australia. I watched throughout the day the young girls having their hair and make-up done in the Beauty tent, their eyes and smiles getting brighter and brighter as the day went on. They all looked and felt absolutely divine at the end of a day dedicated to celebrating them.
But I also felt a deep sadness in me, a sadness for the little girl in me who had never been celebrated, who never felt beautiful or precious or honoured. As a young girl and even as a young woman I never felt I deserved to be celebrated. Like Dragana, it is only since coming to Universal Medicine and being inspired by Natalie Benhayon and other women that I’ve come to develop self-worth and a deep sense of who I am as a woman (it is still a work in progress). As I reflected on yesterday I realise how appreciative I am that I can now celebrate the amazing woman I am, that I can appreciate my beauty and preciousness and honour the girl and the woman within.
While reading your comment Michelle, I found myself re-connecting to the possibility that I had disconnected to the natural tenderness a young boy has and honours, until such time as society insists we ‘become a man’. Thanks to the presentations and reflections offered by Universal Medicine I am now re-connecting and allowing the strength of my inner tenderness to be expressible again.
Thanks for this very timely blog Dragana. It’s a great reminder that life will give us back what we put into it. Self-worth is a big issue for a lot of people and I know, before I came to the presentations of Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon, my self-worth was very low. I had no idea what true love was, but like many others I have been inspired to know that true love comes first from loving myself.
I love the idea of a love affair with myself. The more I nurture me, the more I feel love from the inside out, and then the more comes back to me from the outside in. It make me giggle inside and out.
You got it Dragana. Self love is deeply important to all of us. When someone has self love then he/she will be ready to love others equally.
I too loved this line Dragana ‘I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth’ every cell and atom in the Universe is wired for love calling out for us to deeply love and nurture ourselves. Thank you.
That brought up a big smile Anne Marie: “Every cell and atom in the Universe is wired for Love.” This means if we just stop fighting it, we can’t help but drift back into the Love that we too are wired for.
Thanks Dragana, my body relaxed and said yes when you wrote “I became aware that not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself. The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.”
There’s much for me to learn still about loving myself deeply. It’s a daily work in progress and something that I feel will never end. It just gets deeper and more amazing.
So true Jinya. I used to think there was a point I would reach and could tick the box as done. Now I am appreciating that regardless of where I am, what I experience is just the tip of the iceberg. When I choose to stay open – to observe life and learn, more and more of the iceberg is revealed and like you I find that my experience just gets deeper and more amazing.
I love this question, would we walk away if someone talked or thought about us the way we think and act towards ourselves? To be as caring and tender with ourselves as we would want another to be with us.
An inspiring read Dragana, for me this line…’ I used to (and at times still occasionally do now) talk to myself in a way that if that were somebody else talking to me, I would have said goodbye to the person long ago!’… is a definite wake up call! Thank you
Hi Dragana. I like how you bring self worth to a verb, it seems more accessible and ordinary ..not the great monster issue that I have often read about in the past. So too the simplicity in “not only do I love life, but that life loves me back and that it wants me to nurture myself’ This is beautiful and inspiring too. Thank you.
Awesome Dragana. Your love and truth is deeply felt.
Self-worth is definitely a verb – I agree. I love your point about how we would not accept another person speaking to us the way we often speak to ourselves – that is a so true and definitely something interesting to watch out for.
Thank you Dragana. Reading the post I realise I too have come a long way from where I was in terms of self-worth or lack of it should I say. Serge Benhayon was the one who through his consistent honouring and his choice to always relate to my true essence, provided a reflection long enough for me to finally say: “okay maybe I am worth it”! I too have learned a great deal about myself in this area and my life and my expression is all the richer as a result. I too have noticed that it is an ongoing deepening area for me. Thank you for highlighting those comments that we may say to ourself while we would never put up with anyone else saying the same. This is very valuable and show areas that could do with immediate attention.
Lovely words Dragana, with self-worth we all expand.
I love how you’ve said that – “with self-worth we all expand”, it’s so true.
This is gorgeous Dragana, thank you.
“the love for myself comes first” rang out to me Dragana. The more I stay aware of myself the more I realise that it can be no other way, there is simply no getting away from putting myself first!…now that sounds such an alien concept to most of us growing up, me included, but ‘the love for myself first’ means that if the starting point is feeling loved then what comes next will be lovely too. Work in progress…maybe we could call it a ‘labour of love’.
Yes I agree Priscila. I have just re-read your blog Dragana and have realized that life loves me back and how I don’t take notice of it when I choose to not focus on self-worth. A great reminder to start my day.
Thank you
Thank you for sharing your.. forever a work in progress experiences. Reading this has inspired me to appreciate more that there’s a lot of love in my life that I’m actually worthy of.
Hi Dragana, I love what you say here, very encouraging: The deeper my love for myself, the more the universe (or call it God if you like) affirms my worth.
Thank you for sharing Dragana – very inspiring.
Self worth certainly is a verb, and like you, having been inspired by Serge, Natalie, Simone, Sara and countless others, I have made changes to my day to day life that have bought about a much more loving inner self. We do speak in the most critical way towards ourselves and like you said if it was someone actually saying those things we would be shocked and not stick around. I have not eliminated that talk from my life but its only got a foot hold happening now and I am inching closer to fully closing that door and fully opening the door of self love and deeply tenderly loving myself.
Yes, so true Vanessa. I can recall the ways that I would berate myself for making the wrong choices. These days as I more ‘self-worthing’ myself, I am much more understanding and accepting of my frequent follies.
Re-reading your blog Dragana was great to feel that the comment I made over a year ago is still very relevant to me today, self worth is not something I can stop doing, it is part of my daily awareness, if I don’t as Leigh stated in a comment, I can let things slip past me that then chip away at my self worth.
Wow Dragana, I am so glad I choose to re-read your blog again this morning as I am just experimenting with this ‘verb’ at the moment: learning that I am worth loving and that negative talks with myself are not worthy (pun intended:))
The inspiration of Serge Benhayon and many others shows us that self-worth starts with self and that if we support ourselves life supports us to support and inspire others. Saying NO to the negative comments, feelings and actions has supported and continued to strengthen that level of self-regard I hold for myself and at the same time allows me to be aware of what I have been allowing to slip past me, that attempts to chip away at my self-worth.
Thank you Dragana I could relate to everything you wrote. Re-learning to self-worth is an on-going daily work in progress for me. Like you, if someone spoke to me the way I have talked to myself I would have walked away too. I will remember this the next time I hear myself saying un-loving things to myself.
Thank you Dragana. The deepening of self-worth is definitely an on-going learning process. Great to read and feel the honesty of your writing. An inspiration.
Thank you Dragana for reminding me just how precious I, we all are. Therefore being loving to myself first and then others is something I will choose to develop and deepen daily. As the self worth deepens it is learning to let go or disregard anything that I have taken on or am doing that no longer supports my increased loveliness.
Dragana, I like your comment: “I can enjoy a lifelong love ‘affair’”. It brings home the reality that, like it or not, we’re with ourselves all of the time, 24/7, year in, year out. So if we’re not having a love affair with ourselves, then what are we having?
“A lifelong love affair which brings the fulfillment and contentment from the inside out” – after so long searching for this from out in the world, I too have discovered that the great love of my life is ME!!!
Sharing this love with others is a joy, remembering it lies within and nurturing that grand inner love has been an unfolding of inexplicable beauty…nothing can compare to the feeling of knowing oneself to be love. Thank you Dragana.
I love what you have said here Helen “nothing can compare to the feeling of knowing oneself to be love” especially when we consider where Dragana told us about settling for “NOT much and NOT love.”
This is something of late I have been pondering… what I have settled for has equated to the level of self worth I once held myself in. And yes, it is a daily task, but not a chore, to remind myself and allow myself to be all the love and worth that I am, and indeed deserve…. as do we all.
I have found Self-worth is a huge area for personal development, one that keeps unfolding when I am ready. As a woman and talking to other women this is an area that requires our loving attention. Thanks Dragana for your inspiring words.
Dragana, wow…beautiful, timely, honest and perfect! I love the way you wrote about how you speak to yourself and if this was someone else you would have said goodbye to them long ago. What a way to start the day…a beautiful inspiration to keep working with building my own self worth back to the fullness that I am – for we are all worth it!!