The Grandness of our own Love

There is a driving force in human beings to be seen as more special, more powerful, more successful, more famous, more popular, and more amazing than another. We want to stand out just a little more, be seen as a little better, recognised for this little extra that makes us different, unique and individual. It is a ride on the merry-go-round of disharmony, never providing the inner fulfillment so desperately sought and such a distraction from the grandness of our own love.

This desire for recognition almost has a momentum of its own, popping up in insidious ways. We can fool ourselves and think thoughts that “I don’t do that”, but with closer observation it is possible that we will find it there, playing out in our lives.

There is so much in our world where we can see this need to be recognised, the need to be an individual, not always in what we do but how we are about what we do. The vocally active mum who may boast about all her volunteer work at the school, the manager with a determined drive to turn the company around, the employee who works long hours to show how hard they work, the man who talks about his achievements, the child that brings out their awards to show visitors… the list is endless.

What can be felt here in all of this is a ‘trying to be something’ or a ‘trying to show something’. The need for an outcome can be felt, a demand for something that may not be directly asked. We need to ‘try’ because it isn’t natural for us to do these things.

If we are not making ourselves bigger, there is another option to achieve the same result to make us stand out as being better and that is to make another smaller. Just recently I considered some of the behaviours that we use to bring another down, and felt deeply into the ‘Why?’ around violence.

I watched a documentary of the days of the Roman Empire. The torture that human beings could impose on another human being was horrifying. It became clear to me, that once we separate from another in our heart, we have started the beginning of a journey towards the most brutal and barbaric behavior.

In modern days, this violence still plays out. We can consider the atrocities of war but what about the arguments in relationships, the demise of marriages that end in bitter and loveless court disputes, domestic violence, sexual assault, assaults on the elderly, invasion of homes, murder of strangers and harm to children? The choice to act without love, to dominate over another, permeates our society.

Separating ourselves by hardening our hearts from just one person is really just the beginning. It can pervade into broader groups of people, as we have seen throughout history and even today. Wars are started between nations and institutionalised religions, with groups divided by sexuality, gender and race becoming the targets of hate campaigns for no reason other than the category in which they have been placed.

This brutality and heartlessness comes into existence when we separate from the Oneness, when we see our brothers as competitors or without worth, and not the love that they are.

We judge others harshly, we use comparison to squash, we become riddled with envy over what another may possess, and we are consumed with jealousy when another reflects to us more loving ways than what we have chosen for ourselves.

All of this can lead to an apparent outrage, for we each try so hard to get ahead and be better than another, desperate for the stage, the congratulations, the thank you, the attention, the story, the outcome and the reward.

While our attention is so astutely invested in our need for recognition, there is something far more powerful, so accessible, and much grander that awaits – that is, our own love.

It is our own love that we seek more than anything, but instead we resort to all the other in a futile attempt to feel OK in the world and have the attention we crave. Settling for a moment of mere OK, instead of a life of amazingness.

We hurt so very much when the world rejects our attempts to be the ‘most’ or to get the recognition we feel we deserve. And it is these hurts that can bury us even deeper into further reactions and behaviours that stem from our desire to be individual.

Although our need for recognition exists, we do know we are so much more.

  • We know that our own love is for all, not just for the one we marry.
  • We know our children don’t belong to us, and that we have been given the role as guardians to nurture them.
  • We know that the workplace will only prosper if there is love and brotherhood, and yet we set up and contribute to unhealthy workplace cultures, systems and play a part in conflict that ensures dysfunction.
  • We know our family is far wider than our biological family, and yet we ask them to be everything for us, with expectations that they may never be able to fulfill.
  • We know that violence is not acceptable, and yet we can use subtle and not-so-subtle ways to bully, dominate and hurt another.
  • We know we are equal and knowing about all things, but we can choose to overpower or disempower each other.

If our connection is truly from love, there is no way we could be hostile or harm another. Our bodies would be incapable of such senseless acts. Even if the thoughts came through our head, we would know where those thoughts came from and that they did not come from love.

It is our responsibility then to ensure that the way we live and the choices we make come from our own love, the love that is true and that we feel in our bodies, not the reinterpreted love that is not love at all, but one many of us continue to live by.

This love is not something anyone can give to us: we build and connect to our own love and shine it brightly as a gift to others.

By connecting to the love that we are, we will not need to try, we will not need what we think we need, we will not harm, we will not control or overpower but we will feel grand, we will feel inspired and we will know just how amazing and beautiful we all really are.

Inspired by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.

By Maree Savins (Ass Deg Law; GradCert HROD), Project Support Officer, Tertiary Education, Australia

Further Reading:
Seeking Connection and True Relationships
The highest form of intelligence is love.
Opening up to People – Letting True Love Flow

924 thoughts on “The Grandness of our own Love

  1. Maree in your blog you have summarised so simply and clearly the difference between individuality and living from the harmony and love of our soul, which is our natural way. It’s very relatable because life is set up for comparison and competition, so there is a lot to undo on our return back to love. Your final paragraph was absolute gold, “By connecting to the love that we are, we will not need to try, we will not need what we think we need, we will not harm, we will not control or overpower but we will feel grand, we will feel inspired and we will know just how amazing and beautiful we all really are.”

  2. It is not just in the obvious scenarios such as the ones you’ve listed, but it’s in subtle moments of life too – when a colleague is walking through the office screaming, dying for attention (without saying a word), another person who indulges in their illness just so that somebody would feel sorry for them and finally take care of them – all a cry, all a game to be recognised & praised/taken care of – made feel better because we live in a world where 99.9% of the time the majority of us are miserable.

  3. Finding our openness to heal is much simpler when we eliminate all the hardness we live with, and the harder we are the more holes or openings we seem to have for our spirit to worm it’s way in and create situations that are seemingly okay, but are in-fact still hard on our bodies. Healing starts when we see these opening and the part our worm like spirit plays in wriggling it way into situations that we innately are not.

  4. When connected none of that competition and fighting or striving to be something exists. However, I know for myself and many others that connected moment at first may only be momentary. It takes time and commitment to keep re-connecting and eventually those moments hang around for longer. Or rather, we choose to hang around in that energy more rather than being enticed by the fight and unrest.

  5. We have a responsibility to knuckle out all that is not love .. thoughts, feelings, actions and movements returning to the love that we truly are. This should be our first priority in life before anything else. Forget about pointing the finger or judging another and what they are doing, first look at how are we really living.

  6. It’s such an illusion isn’t it, the desire to be better than another, to be grander, when the true grandness, which is actually unlimited, is right there within us.

  7. For any act of cruelty, or even judgement for that matter, it means we have first disconnected from our heart and the innate essence of who we are. Only today I allowed myself to feel how harshly I have judged others and this was at I time I thought I was not judging!!! It is never about blame or righting wrongs, but always about our connection with ourselves ✨

  8. It is true, there are hate campaigns happening against people for no other reason than the fact that they have been categorised in to a group which another self-categorising group has found to be disagreeable.

  9. That desperation of ‘trying’ to be something arises from not knowing who we are – and because we don’t know who we are, everyone else becomes our opponent, competitor. That we are already love, that there’s nothing to be cultivated but only to unfold, perhaps sounds too easy.

    1. Yes I agree, not knowing who we are has us search far and wide, looking for outer markers to define us and this inevitably has us compare and measure all the while all that we need to do is listen to our inner voice and live what we deep down know is to be true.

  10. I have felt this more within me over the last few days that is the important of being in connection and living consistently from our inner heart ‘It became clear to me, that once we separate from another in our heart, we have started the beginning of a journey towards the most brutal and barbaric behavior.’ However if we stay connected to our inner heart we stay connected with all ✨ There is strength with this.

  11. “Settling for a moment of mere OK, instead of a life of amazingness.” This I can recognise in myself. I have spent most of my life settling for ‘ok’ or ‘better than’, and never allowed myself to come close to feeling amazing and if I did I would sabotage it quite quickly so that the feeling never lasted. I can see now that the times when I did feel so much better were the times when I received some sort of recognition or attention and and not from feeling the amazingness and grandness that is within us all.

  12. Interesting how our need and struggle with trying exposes how it is not our natural rhythm and the body clearly communicates the disharmony in this. The more we turn inward and listen and honour how our body is feeling the more our true quality naturally unfolds.

    1. It sounds ridiculous when said like that ‘our need and struggle’ although to be honest while typing this I did at first read this as ‘our need for struggle’ … which is why I though that was ridiculous like why have a need for struggle? But maybe that is true. We look for everything to be hard and a struggle rather than really simple and easy #naturalrhythmandflow

  13. The more we embrace and deepen our own love the easier it is to share this love with others and re-ignite another’s connection back to true love.

  14. We might think we have evolved from the days of the Roman Empire but when truth be told, we have just created more sophisticated and technologically advanced ways of hurting each other and asserting our dominion.

  15. ‘We will not need what we think we need’ and there is exposed the crux of many of our so-called needs … that they are based on us not being connected to our own love and demanding the world fulfill that love which we ourselves have disconnected from. And we have a love in us, ready to be connected to, it’s the only love we can be and live and the only love that will offer us the settlement we crave in our bodies. We build our own love and our needs, well they then change as we’re no longer demanding that life provide us with love when we’ve already allowed our own to be lived and expressed!

  16. We may not realise it at the time but when we harden “our hearts from just one person” there is a ripple effect out to everyone else around us. It may not be obvious but the hardening we have to use is actually foreign to our own body and so begins the building of a wall of protection. These walls cannot be turned on and off at will and so the feeling of protection is palpable, on some level, to everyone we meet, harming our body in the process and depriving others of our grandness until we make the choice to heal the hurt the wall was built on in the first place and open our heart once again, to all.

  17. When we connect to our essence from the love that we are, we see the same love in another whether they have connected to their essence or not.

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