Evolution is a U-Turn, Not a Ladder

At the age of 8 I chose to separate from myself. The gap that I created between me and myself has been filled for most of my life with an array of debris that has masqueraded itself as life. One such piece of debris was the belief that evolution works like a ladder – as you climb up it, you evolve. 

For a very long time I had a strong sense that I was ‘getting somewhere’ – I felt that I was slowly making my way up the invisible ladder of evolution. I have always been a happy person and never worried too much about anything; I felt that I had things pretty much sorted and I took my happiness as evidence of my bogus ascension. 

Looking back now, I can also see that I mistook the feeling of being very physically fit as a sign of being in genuine good health.

For me, physical well-being was somehow linked to evolution. I did not question my need to exercise, in fact I prided myself in my commitment to keeping myself very physically fit. I saw it as a strength, another rung mastered and an indication of the fact that I was getting somewhere.

In my mid-thirties I trained as a yoga teacher and it was at this point that I really started to get deeply into the illusion of ascension. There is much within the yoga consciousness that revolves around the idea of ‘moving up the ladder.’

The physical poses themselves go from basic to advanced and so it went without saying that the ‘better’ you are at the physical yoga, then naturally the ‘higher up’ you were getting. Those that practised a lot were considered to be, in some way, more dedicated to the pursuit of evolution. It was not discussed, however it was quietly understood, that those who practised under well-known teachers seemed to accrue more credits in the game of ascension, and ‘bonus points’ were rewarded to those who studied yoga in India.

The goal of the game was to reach enlightenment. I saw enlightenment as being the moment when you reached the very top of the ladder… the moment when the veil of illusion would magically lift. Did I think enlightenment was achievable? Yes I did. I was embroiled in the belief that I was climbing up the ladder.

This belief lay like a canopy over my entire life. It infiltrated my thoughts and engineered my body to move in certain ways. The belief owned me; I was its puppet, its plaything, acting out the characteristics of the belief. 

I was not being Me, I was enacting a belief, as sincere as a game of charades.

Pick a category, any category will do.

When we take on a belief, we take on a pre-selected set of characteristics that come with that belief. It comes as a bundle.

One of the components of the ‘Belief in Enlightenment’ package is levitation, and as I had brought the whole package, I was under the illusion that it was very possible that one day I would lift clean off my yoga mat and hover in the air effortlessly. I find it both funny and sinister at the same time. Funny that I thought that any moment I was going to hover over the mantelpiece, and sinister when you consider that some ‘belief packages’ contain killing as part of their bundle.

When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want. 

Within the beliefs that surround yoga there are clear ranks of distinction, the top of the pile being God-like figures who are revered by everyone underneath them.

The belief that I was climbing the ladder of evolution managed to cling onto me for all of 20 years. It gripped me so tightly that I was unable to feel the damage that my relentless yoga practice and deep lack of self-care were doing to me.

My body tried repeatedly to let me know how it felt but my beliefs were so ingrained that they kept me motoring along at the same breakneck speed every day. I lived with intense pain and extreme exhaustion for years until, eventually, my body broke down: it literally stopped going.

It was around this time that a friend introduced me to Serge Benhayon and the teachings of The Ageless Wisdom. I took my battered body along to workshops. Due to the fact that my once athletic body was no longer willing to even walk to the local shop, I had no choice but to start to slowly question my long held beliefs.

By attending workshops, having esoteric healing sessions and listening to audio recordings, I have slowly, over many years, let go of an incredible amount of beliefs.

I have discovered that what lay underneath beliefs is truth and the truth is, we are born already knowing God unencumbered, but we layer over the top of our connection to this knowing – false ways of being, beliefs, ideas, practices, habits, behaviours, personality traits, pain etc., they serve to distort our connection with ourselves, and it is through our true connection with ourselves first, that we know also our connection to God. We forget altogether that once upon a time we knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that;

In our essence, we know God.

This connection is found by looking within and not by seeking outside of us.

Serge Benhayon found his way back to this knowing and he now teaches others the way back through ‘The Way of The Livingness.’ This is a U-Turn because it teaches us that we already know God, we just need to remove the impediments (and belief systems) that prevent us from feeling this connection in our bodies.

It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing.

I am eternally grateful to Serge Benhayon for returning to this knowing and for then lighting the way back for everyone else.

By Alexis Stewart, Care worker with the intellectually disabled, Yoga teacher, Mum, dedicated Student of the Livingness, Sydney, Australia

Further Reading:
Beliefs V Truths
Evolution is about us returning to who we truly are
Happy New Year: Snakes and Ladders or Evolution?

1,154 thoughts on “Evolution is a U-Turn, Not a Ladder

  1. “The belief owned me; I was its puppet, its plaything, acting out the characteristics of the belief” – is spot on. We are no different to a puppet show, our strings are being pulled by one thing (images or what it should look like) or the divine, it is that simple.

    1. Realising how much our ideals and beliefs drive our thoughts on day to day life, makes us, as you say Shushila puppets – is a game changer in the game of human life.

  2. This ‘belief’ package is a biggie and throughout my Indian upbringing I could feel it loudly within myself that this wasn’t it, it wasn’t me and at that time there was no one to support me that what I was feeling was truth banging at the door.

    I too am eternally grateful for this same man, Serge Benhayon for confirming what I had been feeling from a very young age was the truth banging at my door – we cannot ignore this forever.

  3. “It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us.” This is beautiful Alexis. We are living in the beholding love of God even if we don’t believe it and yet when we do accept this the call to surrender into his arms is constantly there.

  4. So simply shared how our beliefs will try to distort the truth, but our bodies can never hide the truth. Until we choose our body’s awareness over our ideals and beliefs we will be on a path of illness, injury and disease.

  5. I love coming back to this blog because it reminds me how deeply appreciative I am of the gift Serge Benhayon has given me and the impact that opportunity has had in my life and on those around me. I would be such a grumpy person, depressed, resentful, exhausted, oh, so many things. It feels yuk to talk about it because it makes it about me, and I realise that we have a responsibility to look after ourselves so we can get to work and change what we have accepted as normal – we have no time to waste.

  6. When our way up the ladder to evolution is formed by the rungs of ideals and beliefs it leads nowhere but when our Way of evolution is to return to who we truly are we reconnect to the Love of God that supports us in every move we make.

  7. What if the ladder is inwards not upwards, our minds get stuck in thinking that moving forwards is about the next thing we do, the next project or the next adventure but its actually about heading inwards and letting more of who we are out.

    1. Just then, when I read your comment Meg, I got the feeling that it’s a little like displacement, as in when we move in towards ourselves, the real us gets displaced out for all the world to see but when we are floundering outside of ourselves (searching for ourselves), then the real us stays buried inside.

  8. As long as we see life as lineal and not cyclical we will always try to make evolution about going somewhere, but the changes we make will come from better and not from a truth. When we know that life is cyclical and about returning to who we truly are, a Son of God, we will begin to expose the many ideals and beliefs that we have been sold and willingly bought into.

  9. Alexis, this is a deeply inspiring blog to read – I can relate to your words and trying to keep climbing up the ladder to ‘get somewhere’. What I have learnt from attending Serge Benhayon’s presentations is that this is a totally fallacy and big fat lie and it can be felt in my body now as I reconnect deeper to the truth within.
    “This is a U-Turn because it teaches us that we already know God, we just need to remove the impediments (and belief systems) that prevent us from feeling this connection in our bodies”.

  10. I am sure when most of us think about evolution it is in a linear way, gaining things as we go. There is also an idea that by evolving we leave behind the cares of the world to sit on an enlightened fluffy cloud somewhere. I am now realising it is quite the opposite. We do a U-turn to come back to what we already are and already knew but have conveniently forgotten. We also turn around to support everyone else to wake up and see the ‘wrong way go back’ signs.

    1. Fiona despite the fact that I shared what I did in this blog, I have recently realised that I have fallen yet again for the belief that evolution is lineal, with my beliefs around food and eating. I bought into a way of thinking that made me believe that by not eating certain foods and by eating less amounts of food, I was a ‘more evolved person’. It came as quite a shock that I had been ‘got’ yet again by a consciousness that loves to keep us climbing the ladder away from the completeness of who we already are. And although food and the amount of food that we eat can also take us away from the completeness of who we already are, I have come to feel that in my body beliefs are equally as damaging.

      1. Wow Alexis – I love the honesty that you share with and the exposure of another layer of consciousness gripping us and fooling us to believe we have evolved.

  11. ‘It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing.’ So true Alexis, and we return to our true selves.

  12. Before knowing Universal Medicine I knew there was sooo much more to life than what we see and currently live. The way we mostly see and are brought up is that (we are born, grow up, get married, have children, grow old and die and that is it). How we are living felt like a such a dead end to me. We are readily missing out a very large part of the purpose and why we are here in the first place and of course Truth. Where we were heading just felt wrong and although the trajectory still is pretty much going the same way, the tide is starting to turn towards true truth. ‘The physical poses themselves go from basic to advanced and so it went without saying that the ‘better’ you are at the physical yoga, then naturally the ‘higher up’ you were getting’. This is such an illusion and feels so horrible, and the goal of ‘enlightenment’, a false one distancing self from humanity and what is needed in this context, feels very similar to bliss. I love what you have shared here ‘It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing.’

    1. Vicky ‘we are born, grow up, get married, have children, grow old and die’ is a belief that feels as advanced as believing that the world is flat! How much are we missing out on by holding such a limited belief?

      1. And defenders of that belief system would probably deal with you in the same way because it is such an affront to what they have always held as true. It is a sad reduction of our potential, so truly wonder-full to be able to lead by example that there is another way.

  13. If we took away all the false beliefs we have about God including his judgement, his demands we be a certain way, his doctrines and his being someone unattainable who will always be greater than us, the world of God within each of us would open like a flower.

  14. ‘When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want.’ This is so true and one of the many very damaging aspects of signing up to any belief system. Feeling that there is some place that we need to get to has us constantly searching for the elusive goal rather than focussing on our relationship with ourself and our body.

  15. Thank you Alex for a great sharing, it is amazing how powerful beliefs have on us when we accept them without question, one belief I choose to hang onto caused me to stay in an abusive relationship, this one I gave up sometime ago and from where I am today with an understanding of The Way of The Livingness little by little various beliefs are dropping away as I claim more of my connection to the divinity within me.

  16. Thank you Alexis this is so wonderful to read and U turn is the best way ever I have had it explained that we are just going back to what we left behind . ” I am eternally grateful to Serge Benhayon for returning to this knowing and for then lighting the way back for everyone else.” And thank you Serge Benhayon.

  17. Great reminder Alexis about the fact that when we subscribe to one belief we subscribe to the whole package whether we like them all or not. It highlights how we are in effect modelling ourselves to certain roles when we subscribe to the beliefs of a doctor, or a nurse or a teacher etc. When we are truly ourselves and living from our heart then such beliefs no longer form our way.

  18. I have recently deepened my understanding about this connection to God. I have felt that I have been held in his love regardless of my awareness of it. I am love, it is where I am from, it is who I am. I can choose to consider myself alone, but in truth I am not because I am held in this body of love. The more I embrace that the more I can feel I hold that awareness for more than just me just as someone has held it for me to feel it.

  19. A brilliant blog Alexis, I too was trapped in the illusion of yoga and feeling that I was ‘going’ somewhere. No wonder I always felt empty and searching for more as there was no evolution offered by this journey at all, just a lot of push and drive keeping me further away from love and any true connection with others.

  20. Understanding that every belief, behaviour, ideal, investment, picture etc I have taken on I purposely chose is helping me to see the bigger picture and in seeing the bigger picture I choose not to react but surrender and let them go. Through surrendering I can see the beliefs, behaviours etc clearly as I make a choice to be with myself.

  21. What is interesting with nearly every modality on earth that is not practiced with Soul but from spirit is that the body is treated as a clear second to the whole process. You can end up with a battered body but all this serves to do is inhibit further any true Soul contact.

  22. Evolution was definitely a U-turn for me… and that U-turn was meeting Serge Benhayon… Up until that point, I was on a rollercoaster that just went round and round… It seems exciting at first then it lost all appeal!

    1. I agree Eduardo and it doesn’t matter if the signpost on the bottom of the ladder says ‘career’, ‘sporting accolade’, ‘musical achievement’, ‘beauty accomplishment’,’celebrity status’, the fact is that all ladders lead to the same place and that is away from ourselves.

  23. I am not that surprised that you believed you could lift off the yoga mat one day – after all, you become able to stand on your head and put your body into an intricate posture after some practice, you would think that anything would be possible.

    1. Yes and you probably did leave your body behind as you aimed for higher and higher things on the ladder! Whenever I look back on some of my more absurd choices in life I rarely feel myself in my body but above my body or watching myself make the absurd decision that sounded or looked like such an experience or ‘fun’ at the time.

  24. “When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want.” This is such important information. I used to think i could cherry-pick when I attended various spiritual events – and ignore the bits that didn’t fit or with parts or I didn’t like. Understanding more about energy has shown me how very wrong I was.

  25. Of course – any time I look at a baby it’s obvious to me that they have a deep connection to who they truly are and they express and honour what they feel without need for thought. A great reminder that evolution is simple and natural as we already have it all.

  26. Understanding that it is a U turn we are making back to ourselves is where the empowerment lies. Not being better than anyone else or mastering something for the sake of recognition. We are all already everything, we just lost our way, and whilst that is no small thing, the reality is to get back to who we are, we need to chuck a U-y, we don’t need to kill ourselves striving to be something else.

  27. Getting somewhere and climbing the proverbial climbing ladder can give us a great sense of achievement. Perhaps it is that achievement that provides us with relief from the tension we have when it comes to evolution and at what pace we choose to evolve. A great distraction is to achieve as then we can pat ourselves on the back and convince ourselves we are getting somewhere. The only place we need to go is inwards.

  28. ”When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want’. I can remember being in the illusion that when I attended workshops or new age events that I only took on what I felt was true and left the rest behind, not realising at the time that i had taken on the whole energy of what was being presented and the energy of the person presenting. Now that I am more aware of energy I know this to be a fact.

  29. It’s interesting that Universal Medicine brings us back to the fact that we do know the truth already. Yet everything about the way the world is set up is a challenge to hold that which we know as truth and put it into action. I remember at 19 starting to do yoga every day. I would get up early and go out on the deck at my Mum and Dads place, everything fit, the sun sparkling on the pool, the quite, the time for me. My body felt strong but something was niggling away. I could feel the strength was changing me, it came with an arrogance that I did not remember signing up for. Also, my body begun to feel strangely weak and shaky after a session. Everything in “life” says yoga is good but my body wasn’t matching, It is great for you to write about how you found your way back to you and binned the invisible ladder.

  30. I can relate to getting caught in the illusion of thinking I was getting somewhere in life looking to better myself to feel successful and to be able to fit in with the world around me. I found that always striving and pushing my body made it harden and become racy and I took on many ideals and beliefs that allowed me to accept disregard as a way of life. Being inspired to deepen my connection to my body, and build a quality in the way in which I am living has been the turning point to understand how we evolve from simply being ourselves and living the love we are.

  31. Pretty much all of life is set up with this belief that we need to climb the ladder or get somewhere. It’s not just in yoga, it requires us to see through the falseness of this like you have presented to start to know ourselves more deeply from within.

  32. ‘It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us’ so true Alexis. It is when I believe I am not enough and have to prove my worth that I think God is a belief. When I connect to me, to my body and move with myself, I know God.

  33. What a great light you bring here, Alexis. Your understanding about your experience with Yoga is pure gold, as you uncover a lie in which many people still rely on, until they choose as you did, to let go the illusion and come back to the natural and forever available connection with God.

  34. It is interesting the way that yoga has been bastardised from its true purpose and tainted with the glamour we see it done these days where it is about competition and comparison distracting people from feeling the opportunities that are presented all around in order to evolve back to the love of God that we are from.

    1. It was quite a shocking revelation for me to realise that for most of the years that I had been teaching yoga, I had been aiding and abetting people to disconnect from themselves rather than to connect to themselves and what’s even worse is that I believed that I myself was a very connected person! The depth that I erroneously believed that I was taking people to, was no deeper than some very misguided thrashing about on the surface.

      1. Until the truth is reflected to us we know no different because we have chosen to disconnect from the wisdom we all have access to when we live a connected and responsible life.

      2. Lucy I do wonder about that. I reckon it’s more accurate to say that we ‘consciously’ know no different but the fact of the matter is that deep down we are all the living truth and so there’s actually no way that we can’t know truth.

  35. What you have expressed here Alexis is true and powerful;
    “It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing”.

    1. When our mind runs in dis-connection from our bodies then it can literally go anywhere and yet all of the places that it does go are actually the same place and that place is a place of separation from the truth.

  36. Thanks Alexis, there are many beliefs that try to take us somewhere, such as “I’m not good enough” which means trying to be better or do better, instead of returning to and surrendering into the beautiful being we already are. I’d imagine there are foundational beliefs that act like tree trunks and have many other beliefs sprouting from them, and these result in all sorts of behaviours and choices that have a big impact on our health and wellbeing. It’s a great topic, I’ll be pondering on beliefs today!

  37. Evolution involves us all retracing our footsteps back to God, from whom we chose to separate from in the first place.

    1. Yes Elizabeth, there’s no skipping a step out, every single variation from God has to be looked at and addressed. We are held accountable for everything that we have set in motion and so yes we can act as if we simply don’t know or don’t care but this attitude changes nothing, there comes a point for all of us when we have to turn around and go back.

  38. ”When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want’. This is not only true Alexis, but it is also worth noting that often that package also delivers much more than what you bargained for.

  39. I thought that the more I did, the better I was and the more I was improving myself. However there is nothing to improve only everything to return to.

    1. and in the realm of energetic truth there is no such thing as saying ‘no’ and so the question for us all to constantly consider is what are we saying ‘yes’ to?

  40. What if our own evolution was just a returning to where we had already been before and that our life was just a re-connection to this divinity by stripping back all of the old patterns, behaviours, images and old hurts we had accumulated over our lifetimes? We are whole already we are just peeling back our old layers to reconnect to the amazingness that is there. Evolution is pretty cool.

  41. This has got to be one of the most ingrained beliefs that we invest in to date, that success and evolution is about climbing a ladder, increasing our intelligence, having a better job and even ‘evolving’ as a species to become more advanced and well adapted, but where is the QUALITY in all of this? Being a CEO, yoga instructor or athlete doesn’t automatically equate to joy, contentment or inspiration for others, but always introducing a greater level of love and respect into our lives certainly does.

  42. “It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing.” This was a revelation to me Alexis, as Im not sure I had ever considered anything other than being on a straight path. Not that I ever saw an end to it, but I certainly wasn’t aware that in order to return to who we truly are, that we would have to walk back through our lives and heal all the hurts we had created for ourselves and done to others along the way. What an extraordinary time it has been and continues to be, knowing that by choosing to make a U turn, is to be open to what lies ahead and the endless opportunites that are presented to us for true healing.

  43. It really is eye opening to see just how our beliefs and or images held can really blind us from the truth of life and our choices become cloudy. Letting go of these past values bring a greater awareness to the world around us and we can then make another choice to change our movements and integrate a truly supportive and loving way to move through life. Evolution is a set of rhythmical movements that keeps us learning and moving forward and that is a pretty spectacular way to be.

  44. As they say what goes up must come down, everything eventually will need to be balanced. In this way the article maps out how we climb up an imaginary or a held belief that heaven is found by climbing a ladder into the sky. Some people have heaven accessed through yoga, others religion, others business, sport and the list goes on but at some point we all grab hold of something because we believe some part of it will make us better or get us somewhere. As the article states, “It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing.” So we go nowhere and in fact return and in that way this is the ultimate belief or ladder we climb. That we aren’t something and need to achieve or find it when in fact everything is already with us we have just layered things or overlaid things or beliefs on top of it. I was one to buy into something or believe it on the basis I liked part of what was being said but you can’t cherry pick a part as this then blinds you to what else is truly there. The return makes so much more sense and in a world that never truly made sense The Way of The Livingness has stood like a beacon.

  45. Accepting the love we are, that can be a tall order, but to do so at any age is a celebration – so lets celebrate. To see women living with the truth they are, with that deep connection to their soul, that is magic at every age.

  46. As a society we perceive success, development, growth, progress or evolution based on perfecting, bettering, dominating or advancing our physical world, our bodies included. A point reached or a point in the future to work towards is what we so often drive ourselves to see in hopes to achieve a state of supposed perfection, enlightenment, power. All the while within us all, are the answers to all that we seek. Through our connection to our essence, our Soul we realise we need not go anywhere, do anything, be anyone else, as within we are it all already. As you have wisely shared – ‘In our essence, we know God.’ When we look within to know ourselves, it is then we will also know God.

    1. and it is because ‘in our essence we know God’ that there are forces at work that are working tirelessly to keep us from our essence, so that our inevitable re-unification with God is delayed. And delayed it might be but prevented it can never be, we can never be separated from that which we are made of, we can only be temporarily distracted from realising our connection in full.

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