Years ago I used to have a recurring dream about being alone in the yard of a concentration camp. The dream was about total desolation and incarceration, barrenness and despair. When I would wake from this dream, I felt like I could hardly breathe. Had I lived this experience in a past life? I would have to make a determined effort to struggle from the heaviness of the dream into my day.
Recently I had a dream about being with a group in a dark space and wanting to escape by climbing up and out from a dark dungeon into the light. As I attempted to find my footings, the climbing felt difficult and uncomfortable. It also involved precision, dedication, and trust. When I arrived at the windows above the dark space, the first window was too small for my head. I reached further to open another larger window and was able to climb my whole body through into the light.
When I woke from this dream, I felt light and clear. There was a sense of freedom. The dream to me clearly indicated that when trapped in emotional pain you cannot free yourself by using the mind… it is through our connection to the whole body that we quieten the mind, bringing the mind into conscious presence with what the body is doing. Practising conscious presence enables us to feel the stillness, and in the harmony of stillness, our connection to our Soul, and to God…
How are these two dreams related?
The first dream is telling me how limited I am when I allow outside forces to dictate how life is or how I am, or who I am. How successfully thoughts of lack of self worth, frustration, guilt or any emotions keep us separate from who we truly are. They are the barriers to feeling our true beauty and worth. On a deeper level, as a young woman I knew what felt true, I knew integrity, I could feel my sensitivity and I could feel love, but I didn’t know how to express or live these qualities fully in the world. There was a tension between what I knew in my heart and how to live it. What was missing was a deeper connection to my Soul.
The recent dream confirms that there is a way out of this self-imposed prison. The ‘way out’ is my dedication to The Way of The Livingness, to live to the best of my ability with energetic responsibility. This way of life asks us to be disciplined, aware, self-loving and consciously present – bringing the mind in line with what the body is feeling and doing.
On the morning that I woke from this dream, I could feel how spacious and light my body felt. My thoughts were of the grandness of the universe, how our particles are aligned to the stars. We are more than a physical body; we are part of a much grander oneness. It is a wonderful feeling of liberation and expansion to feel our connection to each other, to our energetic responsibility to life on earth. It opens us up to consider what quality of energy collectively we citizens of earth are emanating into the universe.
This profound shift in my consciousness from the incarcerating prison to the feeling of being at one with the universe did not happen overnight. For many years I was searching for answers to the frustrating sense of limited thinking, and to the inner questioning that there has to be more to life, and I sought these answers outside myself. I used to say to myself, “There must be one man on the planet who is at the forefront of true consciousness, who can get us past this limited, old way of being.” It seemed that life on planet earth was full of pain and suffering, even for those of us who lived in relative comfort and success.
From the first time I attended a presentation by Serge Benhayon, life began to hold a deeper purpose. I began to forge a loving connection to my Soul.
I realised that this purpose to life was to learn to trust and love myself and to listen to my inner-heart so that I could live my truth free of limiting, ingrained patterns. Old ideals and beliefs about how to be were gradually worn down as I began to accept and appreciate who I am. Judgments about the world were relinquished as well – the layers of protection that I had been using to guard myself from being hurt. I was ready and willing to get out of gaol.
Serge presented the difference between spirit and Soul, that we have a choice of energy in every moment, with every thought, every intention, every movement throughout our day, and all of these affect the quality of our dreams, as I experienced for myself.
What is so very powerful about Serge Benhayon is that he reflects a lived way. A way to be in life that is founded on a deep connection and trust that we are all Sons of God, that we are love in our essence, and that when we choose to connect to our Soul, to the love that we are, we need no longer look for approval or answers from outside of us. We are all worthy of healing. And that is the beauty of knowing Serge: he has inspired me to come home to me and to the inner knowing that,
“Love is a stillness that needs nothing.” (Serge Benhayon, Esoteric Teachings and Revelations p. 664)
I have found that when I connect to my inner-heart and pay attention to its messages, I am complete. There is no need for perfection in this completeness.
I feel that I finally understand the teaching of Jesus:
“The Kingdom of God is within you.”
My Soul was communicating to me in these dreams the difference between existing with self-created, imprisoning constructs, and living life from my connection to my Soul – my inner knowing, loving guide and forever best friend. To cherish this deeper connection and to live with a moment-by-moment awareness with delicateness and grace is now my purpose – surrendering to God’s Divine plan and feeling his beholding Divine love for us all. Life is not to be about suffering, achieving or striving. True freedom comes with knowing that there is a much grander picture to belong to and to embrace this with all of our being.
By Bernadette Curtin, Artist, Art Tutor, Writer, Bryon Bay, Australia