When I was younger I remember knowing that God was with me – it was simple. I started going to a catholic primary school and they would talk about God. I remember reacting because I love God and felt him in and around me – it was very simple. The way they spoke of him felt like fragments of truth wrapped up in lots of lies. Continue reading “I Know God”
I recently got to feel what true family is. I was struggling to understand how I could bring all of me to my work, how I could remain steady and express what I truly felt, as well as bring my lightness and playfulness consistently.
During a class that I attend regularly, the facilitator suggested that I speak to an elder who also participates in the class. He is part of my community and she suggested that I contact him to explain my concerns to him and give him the opportunity to share his wisdom with me. His daughter, who was also in the class, revealed that he already had six ‘daughters’, two of whom were blood related while the other four received his support as if they were his daughters. Continue reading “True Family”
In the Beginning…
When I was a little girl I was introduced to religion. One of my first experiences was of being placed in Sunday school, and in one of those classes a lady read Bible stories to us. They were mostly stories about Jesus and other characters from the Bible. However, during the story one of the little boys, who was quite a character, made some distracting comments to other children in an attempt to lighten up the atmosphere and create some innocent fun. This resulted in an eruption of anger from our lady reader and was followed by some swift, violent physical abuse enacted on the little boy. He was shocked and traumatised, as we all were. Our lady reader was also shocked by her own violent reaction, however she settled back in her chair to continue the story about God’s love, but we all sat there and felt the utter horror of what just happened, coupled with the now very empty words. Even at that tender age we all knew this was hypocrisy and very wrong. I remember looking around at all the other children sitting on the floor with me, I could feel the whole group and registered we all collectively knew that what we were being taught was very far from the truth of God. Continue reading “Returning to True Religion”
There is one word that I never use these days and that is the word ‘coincidence’. This is a word that I hear used very often, signifying that the speaker considers that the event which has just happened in their lives was really nothing to do with them: it was an accident, bad luck, good luck and so on, but the general gist is the belief that it was totally out of their hands. I used to be one who believed the same, but as the years have rolled on by and these seemingly random events continued to ‘just happen’ in my life I began to see a pattern, a pattern I eventually could no longer ignore. I began to see that these events which appeared to be out of my control were actually messages for me and often for others as well, with some of them resulting in seemingly divine constellations. Continue reading “Coincidence or Constellation?”
After a recent Esoteric Yoga session, we spoke about the beauty of the ‘commitment’ that the practitioner had felt in my body.
This is something that I had never appreciated myself nor accepted before as there has always been this ‘lack of self-worth’ going on, almost a determination to remain lesser in ‘abusive self-thought’. This has been so entrenched and fed to me throughout my life that it has become a belief that has then perpetuated and kept this energy in circulation. So, in effect it had until that moment entrapped me in an imprisoning way that ‘I’ myself had created – a feeling of lack of commitment coming from “What’s the use?” and therefore manifesting as a sick kind of indulgence that then plays out as ‘the lack of Commitment to Life’. Continue reading “Commitment to the Energetic Quality of My Movements”
Due to family circumstances, I have had some tough times learning to find my place in the world. However, I have always felt safe in the world of nature, outside, with animals.
One of my earliest memories is at age six or seven sitting in a meadow in the sunshine, surrounded by Welsh mountains, observing a brown and white cow chewing her cud, feeling very much part of a living, changing scene (though nothing much was happening) as if I, a little child, was somehow essential to the beauty of it; as if my being there provided a focus and a reason – was important, an energy essential to the scene. When I think of that moment, I feel happy and free, secure that I was (am) very much in the world and of it. I feel whole. I see it and experience it like it was yesterday, in vibrant colour, feeling the warmth of the air around me. Continue reading “The Cycles of Nature – Returning to My Clairsentience”