Exhaustion and Lack of Finances – What’s the Connection? 

I have always had a lack of finances, but then I have always had a consistent ‘lack of everything’, as nothing seemed to flow in my life. But how could my life flow when my long time habit was ‘overspending’, always playing catch up with my finances with any savings just being short term? This pattern was a big reflection of my life-force energy (kidney energy) and how I ‘overspent’: for example, I over-gave to others and put other’s needs before my own (so I could feel needed), which left very little energy for myself and suffice to say, left me exhausted.

What’s Kidney Energy got to do with my Finances?

This pattern continued for many years until about 6 years ago, when I started attending courses presented by Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon, which brought me so many realisations, along with a deeper understanding of my past choices. I realised that I had been living in a way that was draining my life force (my kidney energy) and that this was being reflected in my relationship with my finances!

I started to become aware that there were many ways that I had consistently been abusing my body and that had contributed to the draining of my kidney energy (energetically and physically). These included:

  • Lack of commitment to life – sums up my life in a sentence; because I always believed that I did not belong ‘here’, and that there was no space for me to express all of who I am, which meant that I was not able to trust that I could fully support myself and meet my own needs. This created the huge tension and anxiety that I lived with, which without doubt, completely and utterly drained my life force, leaving my kidney bank on empty.
  • Lack of quality sleep mostly I underestimated the importance and function of sleep and would stay up late; not very wise, considering I was ‘overspending’ daily, meaning my body would have needed to go to bed extra early to recuperate, to recharge, to refuel and bring back into balance my ‘overspending’. In the morning I would wake exhausted, without enough fuel for the day ahead, and so I found myself tanking up on another fuel to cope – sugar!
  • Lack of nourishing food – the sweet taste of sugar was my saviour and my downfall. It got me through the day, but at what cost? I became addicted and so dependent on sugar – and all kinds of comfort foods, including dairy and bread. Over-eating, eating too fast and eating sugar all drained my kidney energy.
  • Lack of self-worth/Lack of Connection I have always carried a feeling of ‘not deserving’ and not being ‘good enough’, and on top of that I was my own worst critic/self-basher and super judgmental, especially if I felt I got something wrong. I can feel now how harming and how harsh and unloving this was for my kidneys, which all negatively impacted my posture, how I carried myself and how I moved.

What’s The Connection?

What’s the connection between exhaustion and lack of finances? For me it was holding back my true expression – it is exhausting holding back love, the love that we are born with. It is exhausting not ever expressing feelings, and it is exhausting and toxic taking on the emotions of others. It is exhausting when we say to life, “I’m not playing or committing to this life game”, which immediately impacted (reduced, sucked and drained) my life force.

What I came to understand was that the kidneys energetically represent our life force, which in turn is linked to our finances. The relationship between money and kidney energy is a reflection of our relationship with money and our self-worth: how we are using it, what we are using it for, and our ability to use it to truly support ourselves and create abundance in our life (not just from a dollar value, but abundance in all areas of our life such as food choices, work, relationships) and this process for me began with self-care, simply taking care of myself, and most importantly ‘giving to myself’, because ‘I was worth it’.

Self-Care, Sacred Esoteric Healing and Esoteric Massage

Through self-care I began to feel what truly nourished my body and what didn’t. Giving to myself included all the support I now allowed in my life, such as attending the Sacred Esoteric Healing and Esoteric Massage courses.

Attending the Sacred Esoteric Healing courses, followed by the Esoteric Massage course (modalities presented by Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine), I found an amazing support for my entire body, particularly from having Esoteric Kidney Massages. My kidneys have loved and appreciated the kidney massage after all the abuse and disregard of my body over the years. These courses were a fantastic support to help clear and heal so many of my old ways, my old behaviours and choices, and a big turn-around for me – spending energy wisely

Space For Love  

This ‘lack of everything’ I ran with for years equals ‘lack of love’.  I can now feel so much more space for myself to express more of who I am. I have created the space for love (and life) to flow… and love does not overspend, love expands, deepens and is all encompassing, bringing simplicity, truth, connection, commitment, trust, support, appreciation and abundance into all areas of my life.

Love – self-love – has been my medication that I am never going to give up on again.

With the currency of love and appreciation flowing through my veins, my financial bank and my kidney bank are flourishing and fuller, and expanding by the day, now that I have my own private and discerning bank manager – moi – and the bank manager is saying YES to Love and to ‘playing’ in life again.

By Jacqueline McFadden, Esoteric Healing Practitioner, Scotland

Related Reading:
Self-Care, Self-Love and Nurturing in University
Exhaustion: Living in a Black Hole
Self Care – ‘Walking the Talk’

669 thoughts on “Exhaustion and Lack of Finances – What’s the Connection? 

  1. Brilliant blog Jacqueline. I’ll never look at my finances the same way again! You remind me to pay much more attention to the way my kidneys feel too – every time they hurt I know it’s costing me…

  2. Understanding the connection between our relationship with life, the quality of our sleep and our finances is not something commonly understood. It encompasses the fact we are not just physical human beings but that we are multi-dimensional, with bodies that cannot be separated from who we are and how we choose to conduct ourselves in relationship with life.

  3. This is actually a very good point! Recently, I came out of my debt, and the moment I saw that there was an ease within myself. I don’t feel the same anxiousness as before… interesting!

    1. So true Viktoria. There is an intensity of unease in the body when there is debt or even the possibility of debt as I experienced last week when I nearly went into a big purchase which would mean a mortgage on my home – which would have meant the first real debt in my life. As soon as I realised I couldn’t go there my body came back solidly again and I felt soon top of the world. Surrender to the larger picture and let go small desire! That was my lesson.

    2. Same here Viktoria. I just had to pay quite a hefty bill. Now in the past, I would have went into resistance and delay of paying it and play small, meaning I can’t afford this right now. However this time, it was simple and very clear. I had a debt and it had to be paid, and pay it I did with ease and it actually felt pleasurable, because I did not resist, thus I did not take on anxiety or any tension! And instead I could actually appreciate that I had more than enough savings to cover it. And what a confirmation of the expansion I have been feeling….

      1. I know exactly what you are saying Jacqui. It is beautiful to willingly pay a big bill. When I first left my husband around 9 years ago I really resisted forking money out on anything but gorgeous clothes or CDs or books – the rest, forget it! But now that I have become the bill paper as I live alone, I have surrendered this resistance and feel beautiful when I discharge a debt or bill. I have my wonderful envelopes with everything that has to be put aside and paid for, and there is something very satisfying in this!

      2. How we relate to money is quite interesting, we can “feel good” after purchasing something we didn’t actually need like a dress, but resent an electricity bill that helped keep us warm and generally contributed to our self care and wellbeing.

    3. I’ve never liked owing anyone money, if I can I make sure they get repaid. Last 8 months I had a credit card with money to pay off. It has been tense but in valuing myself, knowing that I can support myself I took on a second job and this support has been massive in chipping away at the debt and a learning that I can actively support myself deeper. It’s been a huge opportunity to appreciate how much I do care for myself rather than working crazy hours and wasting myself.

  4. It is wonderful to read about the abundance in all of your banks Jacqueline ☺… Your already beautiful shining light will be now even brighter as you bring even more love and grace to the world.

  5. A reminder for me to look at areas that I indulge, over spend financially and in other ways which are draining me. I have been feeling this but not wanting to look at it again. It’s interesting how we avoid what we already know.

  6. Wow, just being open to the possibility that our body and how we treat it might have some impact on our financial situation is huge. It can sound strange that the health of your kidney’s is a reflection of your bank account, sure, but when we dig a little deeper and take everything into account about how we are living with ourselves, it doesn’t sound crazy at all.

  7. My Kidneys hurt just reading this. There is much in this to ponder and feel, our lack of anything that is not love has an effect on our bodies.

  8. Being your own bank manager and honouring kidney energy – what a solid foundation and great recipe for true richness; we address what is not working from the inside out and our life changes.

  9. Money has value far beyond mere monetary value…it reflects all the choices we make on a day-to-day basis.

  10. This blog reminds me that there’s so much more to exhaustion than a bad night’s sleep! When we consider that how we move, how we speak and the kinds of thoughts that we entertain all contribute to our energy levels, it becomes very obvious where we’re draining ourselves – and just by bringing attention to these areas and, most crucially, acting on it, we can start to turn it around.

  11. It makes absolute sense to me that overspending, mismanaging our money and exhausting our finances also depletes our bodies on an energetic level too – for every choice that we make is felt on every level of our being.

  12. As I read this I could feel how I hold back and play the girl and how if I stepped more into the woman that I am, the power and ability to handle and respond to life is very different.

  13. Every part of the body, every organ and system is representative of different areas of life and our various behaviours; the connection between sleep, money and lack of finances is particularly pertinent and obvious. All in all it shows that our body is always there to show and support us.

  14. “It is exhausting when we say to life, “I’m not playing or committing to this life game”, which immediately impacted (reduced, sucked and drained) my life force.”

    Fascinating to read this and see the illusion that we can all live under. We think by not committing to life, to check out, that we are relaxing, taking time out, and recouperating but it completely drains us. We also have this picture that when we commit to life, that we will be exhausted. But it is how we commit that makes the difference – are we doing it to truly serve our communities? Or to please another? Or to put food on the table? What is the drive behind our commitment – that is what makes the difference as to what can drain us or energise us.

    1. Thankyou Sarah, great to read the discernment you have made about the intention underneath the commitment.

  15. It is so timely to read this again as I have recently started work again after being job-less for quite some time. The first thing I noticed was that the tension that had been building in my body as my funds were reducing had gone and my body felt so much lighter. I knew that the tension was there but hadn’t truly allowed myself to feel the depth of it. A great example of what is happening on the outside is always being reflected on the inside; we can’t hide from the truth that our body is presenting to us forever.

  16. Thankyou Jacqueline, great to read this again. I agree and I still need to look at these things – “it is exhausting holding back love, the love that we are born with. It is exhausting not ever expressing feelings, and it is exhausting and toxic taking on the emotions of others”. Letting go of these things to live from love is the way to go.

    1. I came back to read this blog again too Melinda, because although I am expressing much more of myself, I can still feel I am still holding love back…. which is just a deeper layer for me to clear and heal and in which I will seek support with, as it feels very old. An Esoteric Chakra Puncture session feels very supportive right now.

  17. This is a very revealing sharing Jacqueline! To recognise that we are all affected by our lack of love for ourselves and this includes our bodies and the energy we have to spend.

  18. Wonderful Jacqueline , its all connected , once we give people family or other wise a hand out we are sure to deplete our own energy and have it drained . But if we give a hand up , then we support the other to live from their own life force and maintain our own life force in the process.

  19. So beautiful to read Jacqueline, the body is so reflective of every part of our lives where we give ourselves away and overspending our finances this is a reflection of how our kidneys are being depleted, the remedy that the whole world is suffering for the want of is “Love – self-love – has been my medication that I am never going to give up on again.”

  20. Not expressing what we can feel is there to be said, and taking on the emotions of others.. just two of the ways in which we exhaust ourselves. What starts to turn this around is a willingness to get honest and bring awareness to what makes us exhausted and what energises us: to look beyond the sleep and food patterns at how I am living in each moment. It’s not necessarily about doing less, but so often about looking at the quality that I’m doing things in.

  21. What I am coming to realise and claim within my body is that my sense of self-worth doesn’t come and go as it pleases for it is always there… it is through the choices I make that determine as to whether I know who I truly am and feel good about myself or not.

  22. This is such a brilliant blog for me to read. I too have exhausted my bank and kidneys for far too long. It’s a pattern I have said yes to that offers no support. There is so much love and vitality on offer when we re-imprint our living way to align with love and all it offers.

  23. Oh my gosh … there certainly is a connection there isn’t there ….:-) imagine if humanity felt into this and actually embraced this understanding… what a turnaround there will be.

  24. I love how you have tied overspending in with lack of sleep or lack of quality of sleep .. it makes perfect sense.

  25. Wow what a great blog on life as we live it and the choices we make that then hold us in a constant pattern of less when in truth we are so and have always been much more. The love bank account is always overflowing when we choose to fund our life with self-loving movements and choices that express this truth, it is only when we withdraw that love we begin to deplete our love funds and we also deplete our bodies in the process. A great blog to read today thank you Jacqueline.

  26. It makes complete sense the connection between life force and money, as well as the connection between lack of self worth and lack of finances. In self-love and selfcare we find the re-balance of both of them

  27. I love what you share here Jacqueline, we can’t ignore the connection between our body and our finances. What an opportunity to read what our body is trying to tell us and to make adjustments in our lives that will reward us back in many beautiful and enriching ways.

  28. Every part of life is reflected in the physical body, its strengths or weaknesses, its ailments and disabilities. And when they are nominated and get addressed, to the best of the physical frame’s capabilities, life starts flowing and flourishing again.

  29. I get a sense that we sometimes behave as if there’s not enough love to go round for everyone and hold back from some while giving more to others. If love indeed is who we are and what surrounds and passes through us, it totally makes sense how exhausting it would be to live in such a way that interferes with and stops love to be and flow.

  30. When we invest in anything other than being our true selves, the love we are, our connection to Soul, we are in fact resisting and opposing the vibration of our essence to move us. Instead we are moved by and live with a quality that disregards our essence as such there is a loss that we feel needs to be substituted, and this we seek to fulfil through engaging in emotions, lifestyles and behaviours that we think will give us a sense of worth, yet do not represent who we are. When we invest in surrendering to the love we are we will discover that this is where the greatest riches are lived, to which there is no end.

  31. It gives a new yet old meaning to what investment, finances, banking and money truly mean. You can play with these on a physical level which goes well for some, but not well for others and yet I have seen even the ones that it goes well for still not fulfilled. So here we have the building between what’s physical and what is energy first. In other words taking care of the quality of how things come to be and not solely be focused on how they come to be. This way you have the whole package and it’s no stab in the dark or burden to carry but more of a living quality that you hold that brings all else to you.

  32. One of the many profound and wonderful insights that working with Universal Medicine offers is the interconnectedness of all things… Well that’s the big picture ☺, but also the way everything is connected… As this article so clearly points out

  33. “With the currency of love and appreciation flowing through my veins, my financial bank and my kidney bank are flourishing and fuller, and expanding by the day, ” Beautiful Jacqueline, when we love and appreciate and commit to ourselves, the rest can easily follow.

  34. What would be, if people get taught all this you are presenting here in this blog about money in general and when they have money issues?! Money is such an amazing reflection and gets reduced only to numbers in general. Reading the flow in ones life with it can tell so much about the persons expression/ holding back/ flow/self worth/ love…That is the beauty about life in general, when you see it as a constant developement- you can pick up one area and look into it and it will represent and reflect you everything if you are open to it.

  35. Even being poor or having money issues can be a way of seeking recognition. Once solved and the root issue is looked at why we need extra attention or empathy from the outside, the way money comes to us will change. Indeed the path for it to come is actually then open. Before, some part of you wants and needs the recognition, so why would the universe be able to support you with your life force/ money, when you are actually communicating that you want the extra attention more than this. Why things are how they are is always simple – never complicated – cause and effect will show off very quickly and clear.

    1. The cause and effect of any money issues I had always comes back to giving too much out to others when it was not needed which is linked to my big investment of people getting it which feels so imposing. And it was my way of avoiding looking at my own issues, being too busy helping others that I bought into the false belief that I was doing just fine – when clearly I wasn’t. I simply was not ready to go there and to take responsibility.

  36. Being financially stressed for the last two years I’ve come to realise that investing in my own self-care isn’t expensive, it can be in the quality I do what I do in. When I invest in this the riches come back to me. Be that money, or support in other ways. I can say I have a rich life even if I don’t have £000000’s in the bank.

  37. “What’s the connection between exhaustion and lack of finances? For me it was holding back my true expression”… The opposite is true as well – my shyness (holding back) around having a flow of money (energy/light) in this life, is JUST THE SAME, it is equally holding back and equally exhausting.

  38. Wow – financial planning at its best Jacqueline. You remind me that no true consideration of our financial circumstances is complete if we do not examine the relationship we have with ourselves.

  39. It’s interesting to consider that money is energy, it comes with an energy and of course our energy effects it, so I love your point about spending energy wisely, put simply, money can either be used to support us and others to grow or for the opposite purposes.

  40. I love how you took responsibility for your situation of lack of finances, because there is always a reason for the circumstances we are in and evaluating every little thing that we do, feel and think in our life can greatly contribute to understanding the situation and then to bring change.

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