Evolution is a U-Turn, Not a Ladder

At the age of 8 I chose to separate from myself. The gap that I created between me and myself has been filled for most of my life with an array of debris that has masqueraded itself as life. One such piece of debris was the belief that evolution works like a ladder – as you climb up it, you evolve. 

For a very long time I had a strong sense that I was ‘getting somewhere’ – I felt that I was slowly making my way up the invisible ladder of evolution. I have always been a happy person and never worried too much about anything; I felt that I had things pretty much sorted and I took my happiness as evidence of my bogus ascension. 

Looking back now, I can also see that I mistook the feeling of being very physically fit as a sign of being in genuine good health.

For me, physical well-being was somehow linked to evolution. I did not question my need to exercise, in fact I prided myself in my commitment to keeping myself very physically fit. I saw it as a strength, another rung mastered and an indication of the fact that I was getting somewhere.

In my mid-thirties I trained as a yoga teacher and it was at this point that I really started to get deeply into the illusion of ascension. There is much within the yoga consciousness that revolves around the idea of ‘moving up the ladder.’

The physical poses themselves go from basic to advanced and so it went without saying that the ‘better’ you are at the physical yoga, then naturally the ‘higher up’ you were getting. Those that practised a lot were considered to be, in some way, more dedicated to the pursuit of evolution. It was not discussed, however it was quietly understood, that those who practised under well-known teachers seemed to accrue more credits in the game of ascension, and ‘bonus points’ were rewarded to those who studied yoga in India.

The goal of the game was to reach enlightenment. I saw enlightenment as being the moment when you reached the very top of the ladder… the moment when the veil of illusion would magically lift. Did I think enlightenment was achievable? Yes I did. I was embroiled in the belief that I was climbing up the ladder.

This belief lay like a canopy over my entire life. It infiltrated my thoughts and engineered my body to move in certain ways. The belief owned me; I was its puppet, its plaything, acting out the characteristics of the belief. 

I was not being Me, I was enacting a belief, as sincere as a game of charades.

Pick a category, any category will do.

When we take on a belief, we take on a pre-selected set of characteristics that come with that belief. It comes as a bundle.

One of the components of the ‘Belief in Enlightenment’ package is levitation, and as I had brought the whole package, I was under the illusion that it was very possible that one day I would lift clean off my yoga mat and hover in the air effortlessly. I find it both funny and sinister at the same time. Funny that I thought that any moment I was going to hover over the mantelpiece, and sinister when you consider that some ‘belief packages’ contain killing as part of their bundle.

When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want. 

Within the beliefs that surround yoga there are clear ranks of distinction, the top of the pile being God-like figures who are revered by everyone underneath them.

The belief that I was climbing the ladder of evolution managed to cling onto me for all of 20 years. It gripped me so tightly that I was unable to feel the damage that my relentless yoga practice and deep lack of self-care were doing to me.

My body tried repeatedly to let me know how it felt but my beliefs were so ingrained that they kept me motoring along at the same breakneck speed every day. I lived with intense pain and extreme exhaustion for years until, eventually, my body broke down: it literally stopped going.

It was around this time that a friend introduced me to Serge Benhayon and the teachings of The Ageless Wisdom. I took my battered body along to workshops. Due to the fact that my once athletic body was no longer willing to even walk to the local shop, I had no choice but to start to slowly question my long held beliefs.

By attending workshops, having esoteric healing sessions and listening to audio recordings, I have slowly, over many years, let go of an incredible amount of beliefs.

I have discovered that what lay underneath beliefs is truth and the truth is, we are born already knowing God unencumbered, but we layer over the top of our connection to this knowing – false ways of being, beliefs, ideas, practices, habits, behaviours, personality traits, pain etc., they serve to distort our connection with ourselves, and it is through our true connection with ourselves first, that we know also our connection to God. We forget altogether that once upon a time we knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that;

In our essence, we know God.

This connection is found by looking within and not by seeking outside of us.

Serge Benhayon found his way back to this knowing and he now teaches others the way back through ‘The Way of The Livingness.’ This is a U-Turn because it teaches us that we already know God, we just need to remove the impediments (and belief systems) that prevent us from feeling this connection in our bodies.

It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing.

I am eternally grateful to Serge Benhayon for returning to this knowing and for then lighting the way back for everyone else.

By Alexis Stewart, Care worker with the intellectually disabled, Yoga teacher, Mum, dedicated Student of the Livingness, Sydney, Australia

Further Reading:
Beliefs V Truths
Evolution is about us returning to who we truly are
Happy New Year: Snakes and Ladders or Evolution?

1,067 thoughts on “Evolution is a U-Turn, Not a Ladder

  1. What if our own evolution was just a returning to where we had already been before and that our life was just a re-connection to this divinity by stripping back all of the old patterns, behaviours, images and old hurts we had accumulated over our lifetimes? We are whole already we are just peeling back our old layers to reconnect to the amazingness that is there. Evolution is pretty cool.

    1. and in the realm of energetic truth there is no such thing as saying ‘no’ and so the question for us all to constantly consider is what are we saying ‘yes’ to?

  2. I thought that the more I did, the better I was and the more I was improving myself. However there is nothing to improve only everything to return to.

  3. ”When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want’. This is not only true Alexis, but it is also worth noting that often that package also delivers much more than what you bargained for.

  4. Evolution involves us all retracing our footsteps back to God, from whom we chose to separate from in the first place.

    1. Yes Elizabeth, there’s no skipping a step out, every single variation from God has to be looked at and addressed. We are held accountable for everything that we have set in motion and so yes we can act as if we simply don’t know or don’t care but this attitude changes nothing, there comes a point for all of us when we have to turn around and go back.

  5. Thanks Alexis, there are many beliefs that try to take us somewhere, such as “I’m not good enough” which means trying to be better or do better, instead of returning to and surrendering into the beautiful being we already are. I’d imagine there are foundational beliefs that act like tree trunks and have many other beliefs sprouting from them, and these result in all sorts of behaviours and choices that have a big impact on our health and wellbeing. It’s a great topic, I’ll be pondering on beliefs today!

    1. When our mind runs in dis-connection from our bodies then it can literally go anywhere and yet all of the places that it does go are actually the same place and that place is a place of separation from the truth.

  6. What you have expressed here Alexis is true and powerful;
    “It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing”.

  7. It is interesting the way that yoga has been bastardised from its true purpose and tainted with the glamour we see it done these days where it is about competition and comparison distracting people from feeling the opportunities that are presented all around in order to evolve back to the love of God that we are from.

    1. It was quite a shocking revelation for me to realise that for most of the years that I had been teaching yoga, I had been aiding and abetting people to disconnect from themselves rather than to connect to themselves and what’s even worse is that I believed that I myself was a very connected person! The depth that I erroneously believed that I was taking people to, was no deeper than some very misguided thrashing about on the surface.

      1. Until the truth is reflected to us we know no different because we have chosen to disconnect from the wisdom we all have access to when we live a connected and responsible life.

      2. Lucy I do wonder about that. I reckon it’s more accurate to say that we ‘consciously’ know no different but the fact of the matter is that deep down we are all the living truth and so there’s actually no way that we can’t know truth.

  8. What a great light you bring here, Alexis. Your understanding about your experience with Yoga is pure gold, as you uncover a lie in which many people still rely on, until they choose as you did, to let go the illusion and come back to the natural and forever available connection with God.

  9. ‘It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us’ so true Alexis. It is when I believe I am not enough and have to prove my worth that I think God is a belief. When I connect to me, to my body and move with myself, I know God.

  10. Pretty much all of life is set up with this belief that we need to climb the ladder or get somewhere. It’s not just in yoga, it requires us to see through the falseness of this like you have presented to start to know ourselves more deeply from within.

  11. I can relate to getting caught in the illusion of thinking I was getting somewhere in life looking to better myself to feel successful and to be able to fit in with the world around me. I found that always striving and pushing my body made it harden and become racy and I took on many ideals and beliefs that allowed me to accept disregard as a way of life. Being inspired to deepen my connection to my body, and build a quality in the way in which I am living has been the turning point to understand how we evolve from simply being ourselves and living the love we are.

  12. It’s interesting that Universal Medicine brings us back to the fact that we do know the truth already. Yet everything about the way the world is set up is a challenge to hold that which we know as truth and put it into action. I remember at 19 starting to do yoga every day. I would get up early and go out on the deck at my Mum and Dads place, everything fit, the sun sparkling on the pool, the quite, the time for me. My body felt strong but something was niggling away. I could feel the strength was changing me, it came with an arrogance that I did not remember signing up for. Also, my body begun to feel strangely weak and shaky after a session. Everything in “life” says yoga is good but my body wasn’t matching, It is great for you to write about how you found your way back to you and binned the invisible ladder.

  13. ”When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want’. I can remember being in the illusion that when I attended workshops or new age events that I only took on what I felt was true and left the rest behind, not realising at the time that i had taken on the whole energy of what was being presented and the energy of the person presenting. Now that I am more aware of energy I know this to be a fact.

  14. Getting somewhere and climbing the proverbial climbing ladder can give us a great sense of achievement. Perhaps it is that achievement that provides us with relief from the tension we have when it comes to evolution and at what pace we choose to evolve. A great distraction is to achieve as then we can pat ourselves on the back and convince ourselves we are getting somewhere. The only place we need to go is inwards.

  15. Understanding that it is a U turn we are making back to ourselves is where the empowerment lies. Not being better than anyone else or mastering something for the sake of recognition. We are all already everything, we just lost our way, and whilst that is no small thing, the reality is to get back to who we are, we need to chuck a U-y, we don’t need to kill ourselves striving to be something else.

  16. Of course – any time I look at a baby it’s obvious to me that they have a deep connection to who they truly are and they express and honour what they feel without need for thought. A great reminder that evolution is simple and natural as we already have it all.

  17. “When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want.” This is such important information. I used to think i could cherry-pick when I attended various spiritual events – and ignore the bits that didn’t fit or with parts or I didn’t like. Understanding more about energy has shown me how very wrong I was.

  18. I am not that surprised that you believed you could lift off the yoga mat one day – after all, you become able to stand on your head and put your body into an intricate posture after some practice, you would think that anything would be possible.

    1. Yes and you probably did leave your body behind as you aimed for higher and higher things on the ladder! Whenever I look back on some of my more absurd choices in life I rarely feel myself in my body but above my body or watching myself make the absurd decision that sounded or looked like such an experience or ‘fun’ at the time.

    1. I agree Eduardo and it doesn’t matter if the signpost on the bottom of the ladder says ‘career’, ‘sporting accolade’, ‘musical achievement’, ‘beauty accomplishment’,’celebrity status’, the fact is that all ladders lead to the same place and that is away from ourselves.

  19. Evolution was definitely a U-turn for me… and that U-turn was meeting Serge Benhayon… Up until that point, I was on a rollercoaster that just went round and round… It seems exciting at first then it lost all appeal!

  20. What is interesting with nearly every modality on earth that is not practiced with Soul but from spirit is that the body is treated as a clear second to the whole process. You can end up with a battered body but all this serves to do is inhibit further any true Soul contact.

  21. Understanding that every belief, behaviour, ideal, investment, picture etc I have taken on I purposely chose is helping me to see the bigger picture and in seeing the bigger picture I choose not to react but surrender and let them go. Through surrendering I can see the beliefs, behaviours etc clearly as I make a choice to be with myself.

  22. A brilliant blog Alexis, I too was trapped in the illusion of yoga and feeling that I was ‘going’ somewhere. No wonder I always felt empty and searching for more as there was no evolution offered by this journey at all, just a lot of push and drive keeping me further away from love and any true connection with others.

  23. I have recently deepened my understanding about this connection to God. I have felt that I have been held in his love regardless of my awareness of it. I am love, it is where I am from, it is who I am. I can choose to consider myself alone, but in truth I am not because I am held in this body of love. The more I embrace that the more I can feel I hold that awareness for more than just me just as someone has held it for me to feel it.

  24. Great reminder Alexis about the fact that when we subscribe to one belief we subscribe to the whole package whether we like them all or not. It highlights how we are in effect modelling ourselves to certain roles when we subscribe to the beliefs of a doctor, or a nurse or a teacher etc. When we are truly ourselves and living from our heart then such beliefs no longer form our way.

  25. Thank you Alexis this is so wonderful to read and U turn is the best way ever I have had it explained that we are just going back to what we left behind . ” I am eternally grateful to Serge Benhayon for returning to this knowing and for then lighting the way back for everyone else.” And thank you Serge Benhayon.

  26. Thank you Alex for a great sharing, it is amazing how powerful beliefs have on us when we accept them without question, one belief I choose to hang onto caused me to stay in an abusive relationship, this one I gave up sometime ago and from where I am today with an understanding of The Way of The Livingness little by little various beliefs are dropping away as I claim more of my connection to the divinity within me.

  27. ‘When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want.’ This is so true and one of the many very damaging aspects of signing up to any belief system. Feeling that there is some place that we need to get to has us constantly searching for the elusive goal rather than focussing on our relationship with ourself and our body.

  28. If we took away all the false beliefs we have about God including his judgement, his demands we be a certain way, his doctrines and his being someone unattainable who will always be greater than us, the world of God within each of us would open like a flower.

  29. Before knowing Universal Medicine I knew there was sooo much more to life than what we see and currently live. The way we mostly see and are brought up is that (we are born, grow up, get married, have children, grow old and die and that is it). How we are living felt like a such a dead end to me. We are readily missing out a very large part of the purpose and why we are here in the first place and of course Truth. Where we were heading just felt wrong and although the trajectory still is pretty much going the same way, the tide is starting to turn towards true truth. ‘The physical poses themselves go from basic to advanced and so it went without saying that the ‘better’ you are at the physical yoga, then naturally the ‘higher up’ you were getting’. This is such an illusion and feels so horrible, and the goal of ‘enlightenment’, a false one distancing self from humanity and what is needed in this context, feels very similar to bliss. I love what you have shared here ‘It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing.’

    1. Vicky ‘we are born, grow up, get married, have children, grow old and die’ is a belief that feels as advanced as believing that the world is flat! How much are we missing out on by holding such a limited belief?

  30. ‘It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing.’ So true Alexis, and we return to our true selves.

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