Evolution is a U-Turn, Not a Ladder

At the age of 8 I chose to separate from myself. The gap that I created between me and myself has been filled for most of my life with an array of debris that has masqueraded itself as life. One such piece of debris was the belief that evolution works like a ladder – as you climb up it, you evolve. 

For a very long time I had a strong sense that I was ‘getting somewhere’ – I felt that I was slowly making my way up the invisible ladder of evolution. I have always been a happy person and never worried too much about anything; I felt that I had things pretty much sorted and I took my happiness as evidence of my bogus ascension. 

Looking back now, I can also see that I mistook the feeling of being very physically fit as a sign of being in genuine good health.

For me, physical well-being was somehow linked to evolution. I did not question my need to exercise, in fact I prided myself in my commitment to keeping myself very physically fit. I saw it as a strength, another rung mastered and an indication of the fact that I was getting somewhere.

In my mid-thirties I trained as a yoga teacher and it was at this point that I really started to get deeply into the illusion of ascension. There is much within the yoga consciousness that revolves around the idea of ‘moving up the ladder.’

The physical poses themselves go from basic to advanced and so it went without saying that the ‘better’ you are at the physical yoga, then naturally the ‘higher up’ you were getting. Those that practised a lot were considered to be, in some way, more dedicated to the pursuit of evolution. It was not discussed, however it was quietly understood, that those who practised under well-known teachers seemed to accrue more credits in the game of ascension, and ‘bonus points’ were rewarded to those who studied yoga in India.

The goal of the game was to reach enlightenment. I saw enlightenment as being the moment when you reached the very top of the ladder… the moment when the veil of illusion would magically lift. Did I think enlightenment was achievable? Yes I did. I was embroiled in the belief that I was climbing up the ladder.

This belief lay like a canopy over my entire life. It infiltrated my thoughts and engineered my body to move in certain ways. The belief owned me; I was its puppet, its plaything, acting out the characteristics of the belief. 

I was not being Me, I was enacting a belief, as sincere as a game of charades.

Pick a category, any category will do.

When we take on a belief, we take on a pre-selected set of characteristics that come with that belief. It comes as a bundle.

One of the components of the ‘Belief in Enlightenment’ package is levitation, and as I had brought the whole package, I was under the illusion that it was very possible that one day I would lift clean off my yoga mat and hover in the air effortlessly. I find it both funny and sinister at the same time. Funny that I thought that any moment I was going to hover over the mantelpiece, and sinister when you consider that some ‘belief packages’ contain killing as part of their bundle.

When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want. 

Within the beliefs that surround yoga there are clear ranks of distinction, the top of the pile being God-like figures who are revered by everyone underneath them.

The belief that I was climbing the ladder of evolution managed to cling onto me for all of 20 years. It gripped me so tightly that I was unable to feel the damage that my relentless yoga practice and deep lack of self-care were doing to me.

My body tried repeatedly to let me know how it felt but my beliefs were so ingrained that they kept me motoring along at the same breakneck speed every day. I lived with intense pain and extreme exhaustion for years until, eventually, my body broke down: it literally stopped going.

It was around this time that a friend introduced me to Serge Benhayon and the teachings of The Ageless Wisdom. I took my battered body along to workshops. Due to the fact that my once athletic body was no longer willing to even walk to the local shop, I had no choice but to start to slowly question my long held beliefs.

By attending workshops, having esoteric healing sessions and listening to audio recordings, I have slowly, over many years, let go of an incredible amount of beliefs.

I have discovered that what lay underneath beliefs is truth and the truth is, we are born already knowing God unencumbered, but we layer over the top of our connection to this knowing – false ways of being, beliefs, ideas, practices, habits, behaviours, personality traits, pain etc., they serve to distort our connection with ourselves, and it is through our true connection with ourselves first, that we know also our connection to God. We forget altogether that once upon a time we knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that;

In our essence, we know God.

This connection is found by looking within and not by seeking outside of us.

Serge Benhayon found his way back to this knowing and he now teaches others the way back through ‘The Way of The Livingness.’ This is a U-Turn because it teaches us that we already know God, we just need to remove the impediments (and belief systems) that prevent us from feeling this connection in our bodies.

It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing.

I am eternally grateful to Serge Benhayon for returning to this knowing and for then lighting the way back for everyone else.

By Alexis Stewart, Care worker with the intellectually disabled, Yoga teacher, Mum, dedicated Student of the Livingness, Sydney, Australia

Further Reading:
Beliefs V Truths
Evolution is about us returning to who we truly are
Happy New Year: Snakes and Ladders or Evolution?

1,140 thoughts on “Evolution is a U-Turn, Not a Ladder

  1. I did yoga for many years and would attend weekend retreats away to recoup myself and evolve. There is this belief that the fitter and more supple we are the more enlightened we can become, but what I experienced was a withdrawing from the world due to the daily meditation practice, which resulted in me isolating myself from others as a form of protection, but what I have come to realise is that for me it is healthy and beneficial to spend time with people. No longer do I spend hours meditating or doing yoga positions that my body can’t cope with.

  2. Alexis what a great revelation to have had and thank you for sharing it as it is a trap we can easily fall into, thinking we need to get somewhere when we are already everything we could ever want to be and far more. It is drilled into us from young that we need to attain knowledge and get what we need from outside of us when it is all within us.

  3. To think that others accrue more credits or bonus points in the game of ascension because of who they know, or are taught their yoga by, shows how little we value the lessons of our normal day to day life that are constantly asking us to grow and evolve.

  4. Understanding that we are not going anywhere and that we are returning to our natural state of being that we walked away from aeons ago, can at first be hard to grasp because everything about life says we are going forward, up, and needing to improve, when in fact we are already everything we need to be. It is a big lie that we have fallen for but it suits us to be in the driving seat thinking we are going somewhere.

  5. When we’re not feeling great in our body, it’s the biggest loud and clear signal that we’re not being true to ourselves on some level. But even though we know that, it can still be difficult to change. What makes us change? Either our body forces us to, or it’s when we get sick and tired of the exhaustion and the not feeling great, and decide to explore a different way of living, based on what and how we feel and not what we know.

    1. The trouble with exploring different so called healthier ways of living is that so many ‘healthier ways of living’ actually come from the same energetic pool as the ways of living that lead to exhaustion in the first place. For example ‘excessive juicing and excessive exercise’ often harm the body in much the same way as staying up late and eating rubbish. Many people would argue with this but having lived both ways, I would say that the juicing and the excessive exercise harmed me more because at least with the staying up late and eating rubbish, I knew that these things weren’t good for me, whereas because juicing and excessive exercise are touted as being healthy, it took much longer to feel from my body that they were in fact contributing to my poor health.

  6. When we are weighed down by beliefs it is like walking with shoes made of lead that prevent you from feeling the lightness of your being.

  7. It has been a long time since sabretooth tigers were chasing us as a snack. We have evolved and have gotten smarter; we now only have to run faster than the person next to us! There is no race, but we all win when we reach the finish line together.

  8. “It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing.” Wow the truth presented is beautiful and magical and so powerful, beyond all the beliefs we have subscribed to and taken on. The knowingness of God lies within and is part of who we are.

  9. I can relate to what has been written as I also practised yoga for many years and would go away on long weekends to practice with various teachers. There is this unspoken belief that if you can do difficult poses and are dedicated then you are higher up the enlightened ladder. It was on one of these trips that I injured both of my knees and limped for three years but it didn’t stop me from practicing, it just slowed me down. Looking back I can see that my body did not want to be put in those positions and that it was speaking to me very loudly. Especially, at those weekends away as it felt more like torture and endurance than enlightenment.

  10. Alexis, this is really interesting to read and makes absolute sense; ‘When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want.’

  11. The whole concept of ladder is based on the foundation of inequality, being better or more superior are those in the higher ranking and the whole concept is disgusting and anything that comes from this foundation cannot be from Truth, our whole body knows it.

  12. We are never separate from God even when we say we do not believe in God, He is still with us no matter what, because we live in His atma.

  13. This notion of getting somewhere, becoming something is so deeply ingrained in us. Even though evolution is about re-turning back to who we truly are, I can feel there’s an element of ‘trying’ in my movements that feels a bit tension riddled at times, rather than a simple surrender.

  14. When I am trying to get somewhere unknown, as in going up the ladder my body feels very anxious, yet when I feel how evolution is this u-turn and I actually do know everything already, this makes my body settle and feel confident, even though there is still much to reacquaint.

  15. The belief that we are separate from God is what most religions teach, and I for one was tied up in that belief for most of my life, always searching but never finding God, until the Way of the Livingness came along and showed us that God lives within and always has, just waiting for us to connect to. There is a freedom and an equality that can be lived when we are willing to see and understand that all belief systems are untrue, just a way of keeping us away from discovering the true gold, that we all are divine sons of God, innately so.

  16. Isn’t it fascinating how even evolution has become a concept by which people can compare themselves to each other with. Have we really lost our connection to the Soul so much that its very love has been turned in to a game of comparison, jealousy and personal achievement – all of which stem from judgement, something which has no love in it all.

  17. ‘It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us.’ So true Alexis, God is forever holding and loving us no matter if we turn our back on him or walk away, as God’s love is not conditional in anyway.

  18. “When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want”. So from where I see it, you can’t just go instantly to the bottom of the ladder as each rung you have climbed is part of the whole ladder and each issue associated with that rung needs to be examined. I can see the easiest way to live is not to step foot on the ladder at all, but simply turn within – the ‘u-turn’ – where all the answers to life’s questions are waiting.

    1. It is so easy to think we can just say yes to a part of something as we like it and not the whole. It means we have to be super discerning with everyone and everything as we cannot isolate anything and say yes in isolation. It also brings a whole new meaning to responsibility as what we are living in each moment affects every other moment – it really is all or nothing.

      1. In a way it would be good if it could be ‘nothing’ but unfortunately everything is something, which means that every single thing that we do, including every single thing that we don’t do adds to the all and the everything. We are ‘out-putting’ constantly, even when we are laying on the couch doing nothing.

      2. Very true Alexis, there is no off switch or off moment where we can allow ourselves to go astray and think everything else will not be affected. Ultimately everything we do affects everything and everyone else – its a massive dose of responsibility and not one that many of us want to accept or are ready to!

  19. Coming back to the awareness and wonder of a small child while having the understanding of an adult is one of the nicest experiences in the world.

  20. To short cut the ladder thinking while living esoterically – which says basically we are already everything, we are complete – it is key that we feel that we are divine, to feel that we are love, and that all the healing sessions we are doing, the yoga, the walks etc are not destined to make us better, but to discard what we are not to uncover our essence, the divine being we are.

  21. Superb piece of writing Alexis. I too was on this ascension belief path for a long time. And if you are not careful you can take the esoteric also as another ladder trick, I realize now. To really embody you are already everything is key. Wake up call, thank you.

  22. This whole ladder and attaining thing has such a lot of self and identification in it such as it was ME who did it. The complete opposite to true evolution and the RETURNING to the oneness that holds us ALL us equally glorious.

  23. “When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want.”

    This is absolute truth. We are not as free to ‘pick and choose’ from the smorgasbord of life as we think we are. We either align to the energy of love or we align to all that is not of this love and thus the many abuses that soon follow.

    1. So true and once we align to the package or align to the energy that is not love, it gives us the illusion that we have many choices and we make all the decisions but they are all the same choices disguised as good or bad.

  24. “Within the beliefs that surround yoga there are clear ranks of distinction, the top of the pile being God-like figures who are revered by everyone underneath them”.
    I attended a few yoga classes many years ago and felt the push of the class to always strive to do more amazing holding of postures and poses, but feeling little connection to anything except for hurting my body in ‘trying to’ keep up. Years later Esoteric `Yoga came into my life and it took a while to realise that there was nothing to achieve or attain, simply to surrender and be with myself and the re-connection to stillness within. Read more about Esoteric Yoga at http://www.unimedliving.com/yoga

    1. This is a great example Stephanie. If we see life as lineal then we introduce a beginning point and an end point and lose ourselves oscillating between A and B as we try to get to B and leave A behind. By doing this we miss out on the depth and richness on offer when we surrender to deeper and deeper levels of our multidimensionality that can then be brought through into our daily way of living. This approach eliminates ‘trying’ as we are not caught up in the illusion that we have to ‘get somewhere’ but are simply returning to something we already are that we may not yet expressing in full. Evolution game changer.

  25. “When you download a belief you subscribe to the whole package, you don’t choose the parts you want.” I love this sentence. Its not something that we consider as we think that we can get away with liking only a portion of something, but we can become so imbedded in the whole consciousness without even realising.

  26. I too have let go of a lot of beliefs in recent years. At one time I thought that beliefs were ‘where it is at’ in terms of changing quality of life. I learned how to change beliefs for more positive ones which felt a great thing to be able to do – but I was never able to heal the underlying angst that remained, no matter how positive my belief systems were. Letting go of beliefs has revealed a deeper level of underlying truth and knowing – something that is innate in the fullness of my being – and not just a function of my head/mentality. It is a very different way of being – but one I have found deeply fulfilling.

  27. I love this piece Alexis. In the temporal as well as the Esoteric community nothing is a ladder. It is very uncomfortable to just see the results tada, without the process which is a forever deepening, there is no right and wrong, just with what energy it is chosen. But only the end results mean little.

  28. When we are young we think we are going to set the world on fire with our ideals and beliefs, and when it doesn’t work out we settle for what we believe is a better quality of life, yet do we ever truly stop and ask ourselves what quality we are truly living in?

    1. When we are very young we are completely free of all ideals, beliefs and images and our relationship with truth is a naturally intimate one but once those outside forces come in, we simply swap one belief for another and it is these scourges that interfere with our ability to both see and feel the truth.

  29. Evolution is definitely a U-turn – as it unfolds as we turn back to us. No ladders to climb under the illusion that we are getting somewhere, going higher than everyone else, but a simple choice and commitment to turn within to reconnect with the wisdom that is naturally ours.

  30. Great title Alexis – a big fat whopping great lie has been perpetuated by the belief that the top of the ladder is the pinnacle ‘to get to’ in order to evolve. Thank God, Universal Medicine presentations have shed a very bright light on this falsity.
    ‘Evolution is a U-Turn not a ladder’

  31. Ideals and beliefs are so deeply ingrained within us, being accepted as normal and true – anyone who attempts to say otherwise, is usually reacted to with anger or denial, taking us further away from God every time.
    “It is not possible to ever be separate from God, it is only possible to have the belief that God is separate from us. Take away the false belief and we return to this knowing”.

  32. I find it interesting, this notion of physical positions or postures given in many yoga practises today that claim to assist a person to ascend. And I suppose the question to ask here is, what do we mean by ascend? And are we all meaning the same thing by using this word? For example, I know that in my practises of the past where I was seeking ascension, my real motivation was to escape from the responsibilities of life where I did not want step up to what was being asked of me and instead wanted the comfort of knowing that my path was somehow leading me towards a perceived heavenly place where there was no challenge. And I can see now how this was all actually a part of an illusionary path I had laid out for myself and the different spiritual practises that I chose were there to support this initial choice to disengage with the realities of life.

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