All through my teenage and adult life I had two burning questions: who or what is God, and what is the purpose of our existence?
Yes, I also looked for love, comfort, fulfilment and any kind of satisfaction in my worldly life, with lots of distractions and often self-destructive activities and behaviours, but I always came back to those two most important questions of God and purpose.
I felt that everything that ever happened to me, or anybody, must have some plan, logic or purpose to it, otherwise what is the point of living at all? I always knew that there must be a God/intelligence/some power that lets everything exist, but what is it, and why do we exist?
The Christian religion that I grew up with didn’t make much sense to me, so I looked at other religions, read books, listened to gurus and spiritual teachers and dipped into all sorts of alternative practices like Indian and Chinese Buddhism, new-age meditations and Reiki.
Sometimes I thought, “Ooh, I’m getting somewhere, this makes sense.” Particularly, the concept of reincarnation seemed to be an obvious part of the puzzle. I also learned a great deal about the human condition and how we function emotionally.
But no book, guru or teacher could explain to me why we are here, how it all started and what we are to do to really find God.
It had been a long journey, full of difficulties, and I was physically quite ill and weak from a life lived in dissatisfaction, often with depression, anger, frustration and the feeling that I was a victim of life happening to me. I was so angry with God for letting me suffer so much.
In spite of my outward rejection of institutionalised religion, I still had the usual Christian image of God – an all-powerful being with super-human qualities that has made us and the universe; a power that existed somewhere outside of me, separate from me.
I hoped and longed for that God to love me and help me, like an ideal father that I imagined. And like so many others, I couldn’t understand why He would allow the suffering of innocent people.
I was desperately looking for help, being physically and emotionally at the end of my tether. That’s when I met Serge Benhayon and my life changed on all levels.
From the presentations and books by Serge Benhayon, I started to understand the energetic truth of God, life, us, the world and the universe we live in. I am learning the living science of the Ageless Wisdom, as presented by Serge Benhayon, in my everyday life and this is an ongoing unfoldment that I enjoy tremendously.
I now know where we come from, how it all started and that I am responsible for my life and everything that happens to me. I know that God is not responsible for our suffering – it is we who just have to allow ourselves to be aware of how we and the world around us work energetically; then we have a choice which energies we let in or align to.
We can choose love, our natural, divine energy, or we can choose to align to the energy of the mind, with all the ideas and beliefs that we have picked up from the world around us.
At first, the idea that I’m responsible for everything that happens to me and all my own suffering, especially as a child, was difficult to understand and accept. But reincarnation makes total sense to me and, by accepting it as a real possibility, I opened up to feeling deeper into my responsibility (and my innermost essence), and I kept realising the truth of how it all fits together.
It feels like I knew it all along – I just needed someone to spell it out for me. To really know the truth of something requires me to feel the energy of it.
With the Esoteric Healing Modalities from Universal Medicine, I was able to not only heal and strengthen my body, but also to clear a lot of the emotional and mental structures in me. This opened my body and my mind to deeper levels of sensitivity and perception, feeling and recognising with clarity the stillness and true essence of me.
In time I could feel deeply the true love that I am inside, and in one glorious Esoteric Chakra Puncture session I felt the presence of an energy that is nothing but pure harmony, eternally holding and surrounding everything. It felt just so ‘right’ and absolute that nothing more was ever needed.
I felt this presence in every space of my body, and outside of me as far as my awareness could go, and I have no doubt that this is the presence of God.
I also felt that all I need to do is to be in alignment with that energy, that quality, and this alignment will guide me to live, be and act in harmony with everything.
I no longer feel separated from God; neither do I fear death like I used to. And although there are still emotional and mental structures in me that restrict me and need clearing, I now live with so much joy. I know that God is real – I feel it.
For me it is clear now that the purpose of life is for all of us to find our way back to God and re-unite with our Soul, our essence, because with our God-given free will we have made our existence here to be so very far removed from God that we have forgotten this true essence, our Soul – as our history, as far back as we know, demonstrates so clearly.
We can all find our way back to God by reconnecting with our inner-most heart, the deepest, most intimate place in us, where we will find our true essence, our love and our truth.
Then we can live and express from that connection and, with that, we inspire and help each other until we are all unified again, for in our inner-most heart we are all equal and divine and we all come from the same source – from God.
By Regina Perlwitz, Housewife, Main Arm, Australia