I am married to an incredible, beautiful tender man, with 3 amazing beautiful children that I am forever appreciative of. What we share as a family reflects to me the importance of expression and communication, for what we share is a result of us all feeling supported in a space where we can share what we feel without holding onto or bottling things up, where we are able to work on not judging each other and on exposing any ideals or beliefs around how we think a true family should be or look.
Universal Medicine has played a huge role in my life: I have been attending Universal Medicine presentations, courses, retreats and having sessions with Esoteric Practitioner Association (EPA)* approved Practitioners, including Serge Benhayon, for 17 years.
During that 17 years my life has changed enormously: I have gone from drinking excessive amounts of alcohol, smoking marijuana, being extremely ill, having absolutely no vitality and being majorly underweight to being and feeling alive, vital, healthy, no longer moody or needing any form of stimulant to get me through the day. My weight has been stable for the past few years, I wake up looking forward to the day, eating in a way that truly supports me – not eating to hide or dull myself – and it has been all of this which has enabled me to parent my children in a way that offers true support. I know that without the changes and choices I have made and continue to make for myself, my parenting would be extremely different and certainly not as loving as what it is today.
My life was previously one of constant chaos and overwhelm, mostly due to, actually all due to, the choices I was making, however today my life is completely the opposite of that, in which I take responsibility for each and every choice that impacts on my health and well-being and all my relationships. As stated, Serge Benhayon and his family, together with Universal Medicine and its presentations and practitioners, have been a huge part of how I am now, and without what was offered to me I do not feel I would be the woman or parent that I am today. The changes in my own life and how I now live with this deep sense of regard for myself have allowed me to bring a deeper regard to my whole family, including how I parent my three children.
How my husband and myself parent our children is loving, nurturing and with understanding. We are not perfect and neither are our children, however they are deeply loved and it is because of the love we hold ourselves in and correspondingly the love we are then able to hold them in, that we are choosing to raise them in the way we do. The love we all share as a family (and with others) has grown immeasurably as a result of how our love has deepened from all we have learnt through Universal Medicine.
We made the choice to parent our children as opposed to raising them; to parent them in a way that truly encourages them to live all that they are without the ideals and beliefs of how we think they or their lives should be; to understand that we do not own our children and that we are simply custodians of them, sharing with them a way of life that is true.
For us a big part of living a life that is true is to support the body to be light – not feel weighed down, bloated, imposed upon by outside stimulants or distractions – consistently feeling what is needed next, establishing and building routines and rhythms that encourage us to feel and care for our own bodies, whether that may be what time we go to bed, the types of foods we eat, the hobbies we may have, and being open to share and express what we are feeling.
Neither my partner nor myself eat dairy, gluten, wheat, yeast or sugar, nor do we use any stimulants like caffeine. Our diet has refined over the years as we have individually felt to, each at different times omitting different foods and introducing others: for our children it has been no different, now being that we all eat the same foods. None of our children have ever been fed dairy, gluten, wheat, yeast or sugar, a choice we made after making adjustments to our own diets and feeling the benefits and true vitality that came from not eating foods that contain these ingredients.
At no time have our children been malnourished, underweight or overweight; they are the weight their body needs for them to be themselves in life, to live who they are without feeling stimulated, anxious or overwhelmed from foods they may have consumed. Therefore, because of the choices we have made for ourselves and for them, they are not seeking stimulation or comfort in food; they are not standing in front of the refrigerator or pantry looking for something to fill an emptiness or void within them, they are not wanting to snack constantly throughout the day, neither are they seeking comfort in distractions outside of themselves such as television, iPads or computers. We use computers and iPads for educational purposes rather than as a tool for babysitting, or a way for them to avoid, bury or hide from what they may be feeling or what is going on around them.
Making the choice to parent our children has been a constant, forever unfolding path, one that we are always adjusting and discussing as a family. We make choices that consider us all as a whole, and the foods we eat, the hobbies and distractions we may choose – no matter how insignificant we feel them to be – have an impact on the entire home and everyone in it. The way we live in our home does not just affect us, but affects everyone around us – both directly and indirectly in the home and outside of our home – and when we step out of our front door we take these choices and our way of life to all of humanity: it is this responsibility we have to consider when we are parenting our children.
Our children are an absolute pleasure to have, be around and parent; we are offered an opportunity to forever observe what they need, where they need support and what we can do to encourage them in their own evolution.
As a family we live in a quality and a way that consistently reflects to each other that there is always more, that there are always others that are affected and impacted by the way we live, and that we all have a responsibility to live in a way that is true and considers everyone equally also.
With this choice there is no time off, there is no self, life is not just about you, everything you do and say has a knock-on effect, it affects the all.
Life for our children is about living, enjoying and loving who they are, knowing it is ok for them to be who they are, to express what they feel without holding back in any way, learning how to be themselves and to nurture and love others, without judgement, criticism or comparison. They love to play, laugh, sing, dance, connect with others and be in nature. Our children are all born gentle, loving, tender and precious, and why should any of that change as they begin to grow and become young adults? All children should be supported to love, honour, appreciate and accept themselves for the incredible gentle beings they are.
Our children have their moments as do any of us; no one is perfect, nor do we expect them to be, but we do provide boundaries and consistency, and in the love they feel it does not take much for them to come back to themselves and leave their tantrums behind.
The way we choose to parent our children I know for many raises eyebrows, but with that comes an understanding and an appreciation; others get to know us and our children, and from that they gain a greater awareness of the love and quality in which we live and the love and quality in which we parent our children.
Yes, our children eat a diet that may seem limited to outside observers, but it is limited to healthy and nutritious foods – with no junk food – and our children thrive. Yes, they do not watch television or sit for hours aimlessly in front of a computer or on an iPad, and yes they have routines and rhythms; they have conversations with us about what they are feeling, and we have family meetings to share what we feel is needed next for the family as a whole, what is supportive and what is not. What can be observed is that they are some of the most joy-full children I have ever seen, and this is not limited to my personal experience but from what is shared with me from teachers at their school, day care, friends’ parents and passers-by in shops and supermarkets.
I am so very blessed to have such a joy-full glorious, amazingly loving family, a family that is deepening and developing in so many ways.
Our children are forever a point of reflection, and they are always teaching and calling for me to live all that I am, and in that livingness they can also live all that they are.
So, call Universal Medicine whatever you like, I know in my heart The Way of The Livingness is the only way, and our family lives, breathes and is True Religion.
Serge Benhayon, thank you for being the ever-shining reflection and love that you are; it is with this reflection and inspiration in my life that I love and am all that I am.
By Nicole Serafin, 44 yrs, Wife, Mother Hairdresser, Tintenbar NSW
* The EPA (Esoteric Practitioners Association) is the internal accreditation arm of Universal Medicine. It was instigated by Universal Medicine to monitor and accredit the modalities that were founded by Universal Medicine.
Related Reading:
~ Building True Relationships and Positive Parenting
~ The Purpose of Parenting
The Truth about Universal Medicine 
Our movements, our choices all have an impact on ourselves, and equally on those around us, ‘The way we live in our home does not just affect us, but affects everyone around us – both directly and indirectly in the home and outside of our home’.
Children learn from how their parents live, which is why our routines and our rhythms are so important, ‘establishing and building routines and rhythms that encourage us to feel and care for our own bodies, whether that may be what time we go to bed, the types of foods we eat, the hobbies we may have, and being open to share and express what we are feeling.’
Universal Medicine has supported many parents to raise children to be all they are in truth, beautiful to see, ‘We made the choice to parent our children as opposed to raising them; to parent them in a way that truly encourages them to live all that they are without the ideals and beliefs of how we think they or their lives should be’.
This to me is something that should be set in stone when it comes to raising children
“All children should be supported to love, honour, appreciate and accept themselves for the incredible gentle beings they are.”
If we were to raise our children in this way I feel the our society would naturally change to be more caring and loving towards ourselves and each other.
This is really interesting .. the difference between true parenting and raising children ‘We made the choice to parent our children as opposed to raising them; to parent them in a way that truly encourages them to live all that they are without the ideals and beliefs of how we think they or their lives should be; to understand that we do not own our children and that we are simply custodians of them, sharing with them a way of life that is true.’ Also I love what you have shared in how having deep regard for yourself of course means you will have deep regard for your family.
Thank God that we have had the reflection of Serge Benhayon and his family, to show us how harmonious, loving and joyful life can be, ‘ The love we all share as a family (and with others) has grown immeasurably as a result of how our love has deepened from all we have learnt through Universal Medicine.’
This makes so much sense, when we are in touch with what is needed we are in a far better position to raise children.
This makes so much sense, when we are in touch with what is needed we are in a far better position to raise children.
What you share here about the way you parent is really dedicated to connection and honesty. I certainly didn’t parent my children in that way yet whenever I make the relationship about connection the difference in our relationship is palpable for all.
‘ learning how to be themselves and to nurture and love others, without judgement, criticism or comparison.’ I love this, it is beautiful to encourage these qualities in children.
This is the skill of parenthood. You have summed up very simply… to nurture these qualities in children. If we were all raised this way, our world would most certainly be different.
We as parents, really do need to look at this as a role model for parenting. I am sure the results speak for themselves in terms of the confidence, openness, vitality and honesty your children live with.
Yes and perhaps not panic that this has not been our normal or what we have done! It does take dedication to want more honesty in our lives because all to often we will see something we don’t like and then our head is back in the sand!!
Let go of the past, with no judgement of self, whilst embracing the present, ‘My life was previously one of constant chaos and overwhelm, mostly due to, actually all due to, the choices I was making, however today my life is completely the opposite of that, in which I take responsibility for each and every choice that impacts on my health and well-being and all my relationships.’
“As a family we live in a quality and a way that consistently reflects to each other that there is always more, that there are always others that are affected and impacted by the way we live, and that we all have a responsibility to live in a way that is true and considers everyone equally also.” If everyone lived with this principle in mind how different the world would be…
I love this; ‘being open to share and express what we are feeling.’ It feels so important to be able to be open and honest with each other. From my own experience this allows there to be intimacy and an understanding and love for each other.
Yes, when we express honestly what we are feeling understanding can take place. There is then no blame or judgment – killers in any relationship.
That is how children should naturally be – a sparkle in their eyes and a lightness of being.
Can’t help but be appreciative when someone affects us and our family lives in such a deep and beneficial way. Love your living testimonial here.
Yes, me too, appreciating that if we don’t have reflections in our lives we can bumble on thinking there is no other way and leaving ourselves open to intergenerational trauma.
Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine presents a way of being that is very different, and often confronting to what we are used to – it just exposes the limitation we have been agreeing to all along by following whatever is presented as the ideal, or even just a socially accepted norm. It irks us because it only highlights the fact that we have betrayed ourselves by giving our power away.
Fumiyo, I feel that we are just waking up to how much we have been lied to and the lies have led to a form of control that is so subtle that it has gone under the radar of our observation so that we think we are leading socially accepted ‘normal’ lives, when actually we are completely controlled.
This article shows how it is one thing to stop drugs and alcohol and feel that you have returned to a fulfilling life once again – and it is another thing altogether when that life returned to is full of joy and love.
When we bring everything back to our choices it becomes easier to see why our lives can be chaotic.
The choices we make can either harm, or heal, ‘The changes in my own life and how I now live with this deep sense of regard for myself have allowed me to bring a deeper regard to my whole family, including how I parent my three children.’
It’s beautiful how you describe how honest expression and communication is nurtured between you all in a non-judgmental space, where you are genuinely listening to each other and being open to learn…
I have first hand experience of seeing how manipulative children and parents can be with one another. A young child is manipulating the parents, the parents are manipulating each other and the child vying for the attention of the parents to somehow compensate for their loveless relationship. And this is just one family, how many more families are there in the world that have a similar story to tell? Families can be extremely toxic behind the façade of ‘Happy families’ that we all put out there.
I work in a shop that has a children’s corner where there are many toys to play with and to buy so I see a lot of children of all ages with their parents and grandparents, sometimes the whole family comes in. It is obvious that a lot of parents don’t know how to relate to their children in a way that honours both themselves and their children but how would they if they had not been honoured themselves? I feel this parenting and family relationship area needs a huge overhaul if we are to ever have a society that is healthy and harmonious. I am not exempt from this dysfunctional behaviour myself because although I maybe in my sixties now there are still lots of hiccups in various relationships I have with family members. A growing awareness and willingness to change are essential to developing healthy relationships and of course developing a more loving relationship with oneself is key. I find that workshops and sessions with Universal Medicine practitioners very supportive in this regard.
Parenting is a learning process for most parents, one great point that parents could consider is, ‘to understand that we do not own our children and that we are simply custodians of them, sharing with them a way of life that is true.’
We have to find our own way in parenting and not follow a prescribed route, because each and every one of us will bring to the job different skills and have different requirements, based on the characters and personalities of the children we have been charged with. The one size fits all approach simply doesn’t foster healthy, engaged, accountable and loving adults.
Such a beautiful and inspiring sharing Nicole of what it is to live as a true family and to parent your children in a loving and deeply honouring way.
And the sharing highlights what an incredible difference Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon’s living inspiration and teachings can make to our lives, ‘The love we all share as a family (and with others) has grown immeasurably as a result of how our love has deepened from all we have learnt through Universal Medicine.’
Life is full of choices and I didn’t realise how true this was until I met Serge Benhayon and came to the understanding that for most of my life I had made some disrespectful choices that had a very negative impact on my body. Through the workshops and presentations I have attended I have turned this around so that I am making some beautiful self loving choices and my life is completely opposite to what it had been. I have found that being responsible for my actions rather than being a pain is actually so worth the end result of more joy and vitality.
I always enjoy reading this, it’s a joy to see a family doing so well and living such love and equality together. What struck me was when someone is empowered to heal their own life, as you were Nicole with the support of Universal Medicine, that empowered person is then able to take that to their family and loved ones and the self empowering way of living is then shared with others. It’s a responsible way to live and parent knowing that every choice we make affects everyone else, because if you look at society that is what makes it decent and cohesive, and it is sorely needed worldwide.
How great to teach everyone from day one that we are responsible for how we live, and that will have an impact not just on ourselves, but equally those around us, ‘As a family we live in a quality and a way that consistently reflects to each other that there is always more, that there are always others that are affected and impacted by the way we live, and that we all have a responsibility to live in a way that is true and considers everyone equally also.’
Its such a simple comment – to not eat in a way that dulls us. Yet its a common pattern, tried and tested over many years, perfected so I don’t have to really feel the tension of what is really happening. When I do feel everything that is going on, then I’m open to what is really going on for the kids, my partner and myself.
If we were more responsible and honest regarding how we are, we would not be having children as we do today.
I agree with you totally Eduardo, I remember as a small child asking my parents why they bothered having me as they clearly did not love me. When we allow a religion to dictate to society about birth control then we have families with far too many children and without the resources to properly care or parent them.
It is beautiful to give a voice and to include them in what is next for the family, and areas that need more commitment, because quite often they see things very clearly that we don’t see ourselves, and children will call things out providing they are brought up to do so.
Thank you Nicole, it’s obvious reading your blog that you are very dedicated parents and that the children are thriving on many levels. It’s wonderful that your children are fed such a healthy diet free of junk food and unhealthy ingredients, it’s a very supportive foundation for little bodies to grow from. At the moment childhood weight issues and obesity are a growing problem, we need to as a society, rethink our diets and return to a more natural way of eating by eliminating junk food and unnecessary ingredients like sugar. To me your family is a shining light for supporting children to thrive with a healthy diet.
A beautiful example of parenting children in the same way that you parent yourselves.
And can you really parent children if you are incapable of parenting yourself?
Indeed commit to that loving connection in one’s self, what a beautiful reflection that is for our children.
Let’s face it humanity as it is, needs another way because the current model is not working. Recently I read a news article that said children under six years of age are being prescribed anti-depressants here in the UK. This blog demonstrates the total opposite end of the spectrum to the news article and the children they are reporting on.
Julie I just heard a story of an 8 year old girl that tried to commit suicide by asphyxiation. It’s very disturbing what children are experiencing and it’s a growing trend.
Yes, there are so many things coming up that need extra support for children now and often requiring medical intervention. Yet it would be good if connecting and a parenting program were also given as a compulsory requirement.
I feel what we are witnessing is a society totally out of control. Thank heaven for Universal Medicine literally showing society there is another way and now we have been given a clear choice in the way we parent ourselves and our children.