A short while ago I had an Esoteric Chakra-puncture session and as I was talking to the practitioner about how I was feeling, he asked if I experienced anxiousness. I reflected for a moment on how my days had been lived over the previous few weeks and responded, “No, it’s not something I regularly or strongly experience; I’m more likely to feel tension in my nervous system and I easily recognise those signs.”
Following the session, and again the next morning, I reflected a bit more deeply on this and realised that there had been an underlying tension in my body for a few weeks, coinciding with a change in jobs, and I had also been biting some of my nails again after not having done so for 3 or 4 years. I had been eating more sweet and salty foods than usual, and I was feeling anxious about the workload I had, both at work and outside of it, on a number of different projects that I had been called upon to support.
On my way to work, as I sat in the train, I gave myself time and space to connect to my body with the gentle breath so it could reveal to me what was underneath the tension. What I felt was a deep and long held anxiousness that I’d not let myself feel before.
I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.
As soon as I was clear on what I was anxious about and called it out, I felt myself drop into a very deep stillness, I felt held in an embrace so warm and loving and had an absolute sense of knowing that God is always with me, within me.
It never ceases to amaze me how simple it is to get a sense of clarity when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s breath.
As the week unfolded, I observed myself leaving this embrace, leaving the stillness and returning to a state of anxiousness. I realised I still find it difficult to fully accept and appreciate God in my life – yet he accepts me unconditionally! I am slowly but surely learning to accept that I am a Son of God and I can reflect his love every day. While total acceptance may take some time, I felt I needed to make a commitment that for the next two weeks, to stop each day and take time to connect with my breath and my body; to the stillness and sacredness that is naturally within me.
I found this a very powerful way to appreciate and accept all of who I am and, in the stillness, I am rediscovering the relationship between God and me.
This ‘stop’ has now become part of my daily ritual, a powerful way to surrender and reconnect to the wisdom of my body, and the wisdom and presence of God. My understanding of where the anxiousness comes from has also deepened so that I am now aware that at times life, or what is being asked of me, feels ‘too big, too much’. Trying to control life has therefore been about making it seem smaller and manageable. In truth, I have been trying to keep myself smaller and less than what I truly am – a Son of God, equal in all love and glory to him.
When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of. My days are simpler, fuller, joyous, and my connection to God is felt within and reflected in everything around me.
My re-connection back to God and the stillness within me has been inspired by Serge Benhayon through his own living and sharing of an unwavering connection to God in every moment.
By Michelle, Brisbane
Further Reading:
Stillness
From Giving Up to Reclaiming Myself as a Son of God
What Causes Anxiousness?
The Truth about Universal Medicine 
When we connect to our stillness we can feel God, we can feel this immense love and let it expand or not accept it, disconnect and feel the complication come in.
Our connection to God is confirmed in many ways the more we open our inner heart, and from there we can build a relationship with God that is totally equal.
We can befriend God and anxiousness equally. Both accept us unconditionally. Yet, letting God go sometimes is easier than letting anxiousness go.
Isn’t it fascinating how often we find it easier to accept abuse than glory!
It often seems that we are more ready to accept all that we are not rather than all that we truly are!
Trying to control every aspect of our lives is exhausting and definitely leaves a residue of tension in our bodies, I’m beginning to learn how to surrender to the fact that we are part of something bigger here and I love your practical tools on how it worked for you.
Isn’t it weird how we reject the glory and magnificence of who we are for the a vastly smaller version and the illusion of control which does not even work?!
When you put it like that – it completely doesn’t make sense… it’s a bit like God pretending he’s not a God!
that’s exactly what it is!
Life can be and indeed is very simple and joyful when we allow it to be. Makes it even weirder that we so often choose complication, misery and the illusion of control instead!
‘When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of’, How very true Michelle. I had something quite big happen to me on Wednesday. My financial source of income had suddenly been cut due to a mistake in the bureaucracy of processing it. The letter I received was quite ‘punishing’ in its energy, but despite the shock I immediately saw this. I made an alignment there are then to approach the authorities concerned with nothing but goodwill and in my natural loving power. The whole thing, which could have been a disaster and drama with much anxiousness was sorted very easily.
I learnt that anxiousness comes from not knowing what to do with one’s awareness, i.e. noticing more than we think we can handle. Once we find a way to deal with what we are aware of, the anxiousness reduces.
This is such a great blog Michelle. Yes the whole of human suffering is self-inflicted. We have done it to ourselves while all the time God is holding us unconditionally in the superb beingness of Love until we bring this game to a halt.
It is interesting how we would turn every stone in our life to find what is causing us tension but may not consider the relationship with God and divinity and that the ignorance of that can cause a lot of tension in our body already.
We have developed so many skilful ways to avoid and not feel a connection that is never not present, our connection to God. We put things in the way and create things, hold onto pictures and beliefs that inevitably put doubt in our way. All doubt does is delay what is already ours and always there to return to. God knows who we are so is always ever present holding us in love, no matter how long we take to return and no matter what we put ourselves through.
I forever find it very interesting as to the difference our bodies feel depending on if we have chosen our stillness, or not. Any moment I don’t choose my stillness there is an agitation in my body.
Yes, because there is no balance in what we do.
“When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; ” words of wisdom and timely after a intense bout of anxiousness in reaction to something that occurred, these words inspire and offer support.
I have also found these moments when anxiousness or tension creep in usually because I am reacting to something that has happened and I have also found that when I stop to connect more deeply with my body and surrender to that stillness everything becomes much clearer to understand and easier to handle.
Stillness gives us the space to feel clarity, and with that, a deeper knowing of who we are, and what’s needed in any given moment. There’s always a choice: allow ourselves to get caught up in the whirlwind and craziness that is the outside world, making ourselves frantic as we try to control it, or come back to our bodies, to our natural stillness within, through the gentleness of our breath and our movements.
The thing is, we all, each and every one of us, have a relationship with God. Now I know that the atheists amongst us will recoil in horror at this statement, but irrespective of our beliefs, the interconnectedness of all things is a simple energetic truth. God is within each and everyone of us, and in the spaces in between 🙂
Beautifully said Chris.
“I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God,……..I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life” – this really resonated with me. “Trying” to surrender with resistance makes it more painful and arduous and the situation appears bigger than it really is.
And many of us carry this ‘control’, We can control a car (to a degree) but we cannot control what is around us, which is being presented to us to evolve, we just need to get out of our own way and let God in.
“we just need to get out of our own way and let God in.” Yes Shushila, Sometimes and if aligned, God works through us with or without our awareness until something changes and we are amazed at how it happened.
If we take stop moments throughout the day to connect to and feel our body through our gentle breath it can bring us back to that place of stillness within where we get a sense of our connection with God.
“I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.”- The timing of reading this is incredible and in this moment I can feel it hit home on a personal level very strongly. I could feel lately that there has been an underlying anxiousness in my body related to my relationship with God, but only after reading this blog has the true dynamic been revealed to me. Thank you so much Michelle for your honest sharing of your experiences. It’s a life changer!
“in the stillness, I am rediscovering the relationship between God and me.” As we deepen our stillness within, so too do we deepen our relationship and knowing of God.
‘I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God.’ Is it much more comfortable to stay in control than to walk with God, no..resisting love, being in anxiousness takes much more energy than to be in the presence of who we are, God.
I liked your practical commitment to stopping to connect with your breath and body and feel the stillness. and using this to support you to surrender more to your relationship with God. I feel amazing when I drop back into stillness, i feel very at home there and from here I can get more and more familiar with claiming myself as a Son of God and feeling again the relationship that has always been there.
Within the stillness will always find, what is there to be found in the light that the universe reflects within and through all of us.
“It never ceases to amaze me how simple it is to get a sense of clarity when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s breath.” When you choose to be clear you shall be in light to where you are at i.e. Choosing what you know is still, what is service, what is love that will vitally be the outcome.
“When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of.” This is a sure antidote to anxiousness, taking a stop moment to connect, knowing we are supported by divine love every step of the way.
I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life. And yet when we surrender to all life presents (with no resistance) grace can flow and all the support is available to us to take our next step, as God holds our hand to do so – when we let go of control!
Being anxious because of truly surrendering to God, to trust my connection and accept my divine purpose as a Son of God is definitely something I can relate to. And how this is the cause of my struggle and disregard towards my body. So thank you Michelle as I felt a surrender in my body while reading about your daily stop with a natural acceptance and appreciation of who we are.
I often feel anxiety in my body when I am trying to control what happens in life, letting go of this is a game changer and allows me to surrender and be part of the divine flow that beautifully supports me in life.
It is beautiful to feel, the truth that resides in our bodies is always ready to guide us to know how to live in connection to our essence, to our stillness, in and with God.
When something upsetting happens some of us walk to the fridge and grab whatever lies within those icy doors, others go straight for the pill ‘anxiousness’, which causes a vibration in the body that will, yes, effectively wipe out the incident that has just happened and put us into even more distress!!!! This is exactly the same process that people are operating in when they cut themselves (causing a hurt to the body that is numbing of the unassuageable emotional pain within) and yet we often accept ‘anxiousness’ as ‘normal’.
It is fascinating how we create conditions that make sure to keep us in separation to our essence…. Until we realize what we are doing and what are we missing out.
Anxious about surrendering completely to God – this stopped me on my track and I can feel how this is also true for me – not because I doubt it, but because I do not even give this a proper go. The angst of knowing what is available, yet not chosen.
Building my relationship with God has been life changing for me. It’s been the difference between thinking I’m doing it on my own, to realising that I’m never alone. And what an incredible illusion to bust, it’s like knocking down the flood gates to love that you have tirelessly kept maintained for eons.
Michelle, it’s such perfect timing to read this blog today .. that in fact when we try and control and manage life rather than just being in the flow of it of course we have to be anxious! But if we surrender and let go (something I can struggle with), we met life and it meets us and it all becomes so much simpler. Thank you for reminding me today.
Beautiful comment Monica. I agree – there is far more grandeur and majesty to behold in our lives, when we are in surrender to God and the flow of the universe.
Thank you Michelle for a great sharing one that I can relate to very much. While doing connective tissues exercises I am becoming more aware of how much anxiousness I carry in my body, and a sense of letting go of the control and surrounding to trust God is something that I very much want to experience, but am a little afraid of.
I have always found it difficult to imagine life without control, knowing when and how things are going to be done or happen makes me feel a sense of safety. Surrendering still holds a judgment in my mind as being irresponsible and stillness within life still feels like something unobtainable. When I have a session at Universal Medicine I always feel very still and amazing but practically with how much I have on my plate, I am scared if I bring stillness, I won’t be able to do what needs to be done but instead just want to rest and I will never come back from the surrender. I know it sounds silly and that I am my own worst enemy but it is what I feel at the moment.
Hi Michelle, thank you so much for this blog – I feel like I am in exactly the same phase at the moment. There’s a constant angst and chatter in my head, almost as if I don’t trust myself to let go. I feel like I need to talk to people to “help” me, but I also don’t want to talk to anybody. I feel like I want to stay in bed, but I also feel like I want to be moving constantly – it’s almost as if I’m in a battle between my head and my body. But, it’s a great confirmation because I am starting to give a voice to my body whereas previously it has all been about my head!
I can relate to what you share of keeping myself in a state of anxiousness and not surrendering to more grace. When I do surrender I am able to feel what is needed in each moment and know how to respond.
To observe ourselves and our behaviours and and allow ourselves to feel how we are is a great way to find out why we do certain things and with the clarity we then have we can take the next step and see what it takes to let go of it.
The trick to us reconnecting back to ourselves is to become aware when and why we have disconnected.
I’m discovering in the controlling action all I can control is how small I make myself, then everything else looks huge! Holding myself in fullness is being open to all with the love and support of God, it is a choice.
True Sandra, that is what we are in control of, how small we can make ourselves and within the love of God is waiting for us to join, to make the choice to be equal to God.
This control thing is such an illusion as we can’t actually control anything even how small we are because we are not small – we are vast beyond measure. What we can do is pretend to be less than who we are but sooner or later that will catch up with us and the truth will out!
Yesterday I did attend a Livingness 1 workshop presented by Natalie Benhayon in Cologne and she offered the Gentle Breath Meditation to the group and how simple but profound way to connect back to our essence and like you shared too Michelle a sense of clarity is very simple then, as our essence doesn’t know complication, only love, very simple.
“When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of.” As I have become more still the underlying anxiousness and tension I have buried is emerging. Connecting more deeply with my body and my essence is dealing with it at last. I am appreciating that I am no longer burying emotions but clocking them and dealing with them. I find Esoteric Yoga to be an amazing modality that supports my deepening stillness.
I hadn’t considered before that the anxiousness I often feel is connected to surrendering to God and the Plan but it makes absolute sense now that I am anxious about not being in control. Thank you for the inspiration to connect to God everyday, to claim and surrender to being a Son of God and let go the control.
It’s seems to be the one thing that offers the most amazing loving supportive holding, is the one thing that I have shut out or down from and this is God. It’s a strange paradox to think I’m in control, which does set up tension and anxiousness. When surrendering to the presence of God with-in me the quality of my next choice totally changes and things become very clear, simple and spacious. I’m loving claiming God with-in me.
When we do allow ourselves to stop, really stop, and not being forced to stop that is, still having a choice, we can experience a well of nurturing that has always been there for humanity to drink from…. The thing is, it is always a choice.
I agree – when I am in appreciation of the grandness of what is and my relationship with God, all the so-called issues disappear and hold no challenge or threat.
Serge Benhayon has been for me the true door-opener into the world of the Divine, making what was for me previously so inaccessible to a living essence of our true nature that he embodies
The more I practice committing to life, that is, bringing the love that I am to every situation, the less anxiousness can get a hold on me. We know that we will never be given anything that we do not know how to handle and that the only one thing to choose is presence and love and then surrender. I am learning how to go to surrender as a position rather than anxiousness.
When I feel anxious it is a sure sign that I have chosen to separate from God. It is through the consistency of my movements in connection to myself and therefore to God that supports me to not allow anxiousness to enter. Indulging in anxiousness which has been a big behaviour of mine is avoiding responsibility and therefore avoiding evolution.
When we connect to God and the oneness of everything then there is no place for anxiousness and the worry about our ability to cope because we can feel that we are part of the bigger picture and everything is taken care of – we only have to do our part. Letting go of feeling that it is all down to me has lifted a huge burden and the anxiousness continues to dissipate.
Thank you Michelle I could really relate to living with an underlying anxiousness that I did not allow myself to be aware of and would have vehemently denied until fairly recently. This has dominated so much of my life and contributed to lots of unhelpful behaviour patterns that I have been slowly unpicking with the support of Esoteric Practitioners. Recognising that I have a choice in each moment to go into anxiousness or choose to re-connect to stillness is so supportive and dropping any judgement of myself for slipping back into old habits means I can let go of the twists and turns that my mind wants to get embroiled in and simply come back to my body.
Michelle you have hit the nail on the head for me. Your blog just created space in my body. It’s not that it was something new for my awareness, but it was a reminder of what I had already discovered and had allowed to slip back in. Thank you, I feel the surrender to all that I am come back to my body.
I can relate to what you share Michelle and I have found doing an Esoteric Yoga program allows me the space to truly surrender and to feel a level of stillness that is exquisite and supports me throughout the day.
“It never ceases to amaze me how simple it is to get a sense of clarity when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s breath.” Coming to stillness brings the most amazing feeling in one’s body. So why do I choose to leave it? I realise I choose not to be responsible in that moment and I creep back into comfort – then all stillness is lost.
It’s interesting this anxiety that we feel about not wanting or feeling able to surrender to God, to the bigger picture. I realised the other day that I feel this anxiety because I don’t actually want to surrender to God. What I felt was how I have blamed God for letting me down, instead of taking responsibility for my own choices to walk away from him, from myself, from humanity. It’s like deciding to leave the house naked in a strop, slamming the door behind you on the way out and then blaming the house for having locked you out.
Now that I have started to build trust within myself, by being consistent in a couple of areas, and being more honest with myself about what I can feel, my relationship with me, and with the bigger picture, is starting to shift. I’m starting to open up, to appreciate that we all have an equal and divine part to play in the whole picture and bringing about true brotherhood on Earth again – and taking responsibility for my part, just by being me, in this is something I’m now accepting with joy instead of begrudging it.
Thank you Michele for your article these words spoke to me today “Trying to control life has therefore been about making it seem smaller and manageable. In truth, I have been trying to keep myself smaller and less than what I truly am – a Son of God, equal in all love and glory to him.”
I find that the Gentle Breath Meditation is a great way to give me space to re-connect back to myself and feel what is truly going on.
What you share Michelle is very timely as I begin to feel for myself what needs to be released if I am to ‘surrender completely to God’
‘When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big;’ I am reminded of how recently, and for a brief moment I became anxious about driving home after dark along unfamiliar roads on Christmas day. As soon as the feeling entered my body, another came in that simply erased the first and replaced it with stillness and deep knowing that in the moment I would be supported, shown how to be and what to do.
How amazing is it that we can live with a level of anxiousness and not even been aware of it until we are brought to a stop. For me the feeling that I didn’t identify as anxiousness for a long time was a feeling that I really didn’t want to feel so I continually numbed it with food, drink and dramas. But it simply sat and waited, building in intensity until I was stopped in my tracks, challenging at the time but in retrospect, the best thing that could have happened; it was the beginning of the end for the anxiousness.
‘Hello Anxiousness, you have reappeared in my life in the last week when I thought you were gone forever. So I have acknowledged that you are there, felt what you feel like, nominated that you are not who I really am and have come back to my inner truth. In this process I realised that I was in fact feeling all the Anxiousness around me in people, being brought up by the Christmas rush, end of year events. I was feeling you and imagining that I WAS you. But I am not, and neither are any of the others running around with and hanging out with you. I am Love, and they are Love, so that is what I am going to choose. Goodbye Anxiousness’.
“When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big;” Yes ,when we connect and move in this quality there is an instant trust in whatever is presented and there is no need to rely on management tools that will only offer a short relief at the expense of our wellbeing.
Hi Michelle, I love what you have shared here. It is truly powerful to stop and connect to the stillness deep within, this is a great way to connect to God. Control is the mode we run in when we are not connected. I have noticed that control and subservience are two sides of the same coin. Connection that brings understanding and acceptance is the way out of control.
Everything can appear on the outside to be going well in life but the thing is that we and life are made up far more of that which we don’t see but can certainly feel. Reading this blog again brought back the fact that when focused on life’s outplays there is actually so much more going on then that narrow focus and drive to control is aware of, or allows us to be aware us. Coming back to re-connect to what is within us helps bring life into perspective, especially in those times when we feel cornered, hurt, emotional, reactive, confused or simply not quiet right.
I loved rereading your blog Michelle, the inspiration and wisdom it provides, so much to ponder and enjoy. What you have written here is very beautiful, thank you;
“When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of. My days are simpler, fuller, joyous, and my connection to God is felt within and reflected in everything around me”.
Michelle your blog finds me pondering on going ahead of an imminent moment, planning how to respond and what to say. This has been a way of being in control I have used much of my life. However it leaves no room for truely responding to each moment. A moment to consider how this has prevented me from presenting much needed truths. Also a moment to consider how this separates me from my body, from my connection to God.
I came home last night still living and thinking about the tensions of the day and found it difficult to sleep. I then did a gentle breath meditation and my whole body settled and I felt myself again.
Beautiful Michelle, I love the simplicity you present of finding a relationship with God through stillness, a quality inside you. This is a far cry from the institutionalised version of God that has us relegated to that of a ‘sinner’, forever working to absolve ourselves in order to be accepted by Him.
Thank you for this reflection Michelle. I have recently become aware that my not being fully open to and with others is because I have been keeping God at arm’s length. God’s Divine love and support is with and within me all the time but I have not appreciated that I have to say yes to being at one with God.
‘I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.’ This makes a lot of sense Michelle. Control is such a big part of desperately trying to maintain a sense of security, when all we really have to do is live from our essence. The anxiousness serves to fragment us and stop us from surrendering to the essence which is so nurturing and a great beauty to live from.
This is a very pertinent blog right now. We are here to bring love back as our living way, we come around again and again to ensure we don’t leave anyone behind and we all choose to live love as our normal. Who would have thought that was a difficult choice and yet here we are very often choosing the polar opposite.
Many many months have passed since I first read this awesome blog Michelle, and so much has changed with myself and anxiousness. I have been working with letting go all the conditions that I have on life that keep me ‘safe’ and ‘secure’ – I have had conditions on the way life should look, people should behave and, if that doesn’t happen, I react – basically because things have to look a certain way in order for me to feel safe. The question is why do I need to keep safe? Because I was not fully living from my truth and essence, therefore there was always an unease, an unsettlement and so my constant motivation was towards securing a life I could cope with. At a healing course presented by Serge Benhayon I was able to finally release these myriad conditions which were keeping me from accessing my full trust with God, and what followed was the release of that full trust which just flowed in though my heart. Not one anxious moment has come up for me since that day, just observation and flow . . . and power.
Reading this is such a blessing Michelle. So often we look outside of ourselves for reasons to blame for the anxiousness and restlessness we feel. Yet when we are willing to be honest with ourselves, deeply reflecting on the choices we are making, we then can come to the truth of what is really amiss. Every moment we have the choice to live in connection within our Soul, our stillness within, in union with our bodies, in surrender to God and every moment we resist this we are stepping away from all that we naturally are. Thank you for the powerful reminder that what we choose to surrender to, or not, is directly reflected in our bodies, which highlights the how significant our relationship with our bodies are.
Anxiousness is an insidious plague that is undermining our societies connection with the stillness that is their essence, to the point where people do not even realize that this ‘condition’ is deep inside of them.
“When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of.” So true Michelle, when I feel connected to God, there is no need to be anything than me in relationship with the all and all the anxiousness disappears and no job or task at hand is too much, but just simply done.
Creating rituals into our daily rhythm to reconnect to the stillness within is a way to let go of control and complexity and instead trust in the simplicity and deep wisdom of our bodies.
This beautiful, finely sensed blog can be read again and again! It really sets me up for the day to feel its richness of energy and to keep deepening my awareness so that any anxiousness I may have is nominated and felt so that it will not dominate me. It is so liberating to see how we are using this emotional reaction of anxiousness to purportedly protect ourselves from life’s ‘slings and arrows of outrageous fortune’. But as you say Michelle it is signal that we are controlling life and not surrendering, and that we have conditions on life that we feel we must maintain to be safe. In fact this is the least safe way to go!
“how simple it is to get a sense of clarity when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s breath”.… And there we have it such a simple statement… And yet it carries within it the key to the resolution of the awful mess that humanity has ended up in… To be still, be gentle, and to actually feel that within.
The exact same level of stillness is within us all. Even a person who murders another has not an ounce less stillness in them at the moment that they murder, than a buddhist monk sitting on the side of a mountain and meditating, it’s simply a question of how much crap we have layered over the top of the stillness.
Making a daily commitment to connect is such a vital part of life, and one I don’t feel we put enough importance on. What if many of our problems, such as anxiousness, are simply a lack of choosing to connect? It would make life very simple!
Isn’t it extraordinary that the love of God is always there… immutable, and will always be so, and it is simply our choice whether we are connected to this , or not.
Thank you for this blog. I am learning to trust that feeling of sinking back into a trust that I am always in Gods love, it doesn’t go anywhere, but I do. The moment I doubt or feel like I have to fix something I take a little step away and if I don’t pick up on that tension I can be gone for a while.
Deep surrender is restful and restorative, so different from the need to control situations.
This is beautifully simple. Stillness – connection – love. Surely there is something more complicated, an initiation test, a series of rituals, a quest? No, it’s simple, stillness – connection – God.
I love this line – ‘When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big.’ When we connect to who we really are everything is just there, nothing is too big or scary, there’s just simply work to be done.
I really enjoyed reading this and could relate to many of the things you shared in your blog. I find myself contemplating if I am also denying myself a clarity from not letting go and surrendering in this way and am intrigued as to what may be possible if I choose to commit to giving myself the time and space to explore this… I look forward to giving this a go to see what unfolds.
Michelle, I have been feeling an overwhelm and anxiousness over the last few weeks and reading your blog today reminds me that going into smallness actually feeds the anxiousness, and that in fact if we can see that trying to keep ourselves smaller doesn’t work we allow space for the bigness and support of who we truly are. I’m not there just this minute, but this is a great reminder to see that trying to control and stay small doesn’t work. So I will be exploring and catching those moments of smallness through simply connecting back to and feeling my body.
I’ve never considered the link between anxiousness and God, but it takes perfect sense, we cling so desperately to human life and everything we can control, and it’s only in moments like changing jobs where we have no control that we realise we are not actually the ones in control, and life asks us to surrender to something much grander and knowing we’re always taken care of.
It is so timely to read your comment this morning when I have just recently lost my job. the act of surrender has been so brilliant. I know I am so supported and looked after as I say “YES” to life and drop all conditions I may place upon it for my comfort!
Thank you Michelle – of late I’ve been realising that I have been wanting to control a lot and not fully letting go and trusting that whatever is there for me will be there, I only have to trust.
This blog is a delightful reminder that when I feel anxiousness I need to stop and reconnect with my body and feel my connection to God.
It is such a simple thing to do, stop and feel the stillness within us, the connection, but most often we hurtle forward doing the opposite. Could it be an investment in staying with what we are familiar with rather than stepping into a place where we can make no more excuses?
This is deeply beautiful Michelle… ‘When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of. My days are simpler, fuller, joyous, and my connection to God is felt within and reflected in everything around me.’ This surrender is extremely powerful and amazingly energy saving! No longer do we have to invest in a drama of anxiousness that drains our precious body of energy and life.
This is such a profound blog Michelle, that it can be read and re-read many times and still the ‘living’ quality can be felt. The point about the partnership of anxiousness and wanting to control is very pertinent to us all. You mention the anxiousness around the new job and workload, and this is what is actually happening for me at the moment – I am looking for a new job and as opportunities start coming in the workload and re-situating things is quite huge, along with a slight unease about finances! So I am bathing in your paragraph: ‘I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.’ Thank you!
Thank you, Michelle. Your sharing is so relatable for me right now. I have also started a new job recently, on top of other job I already have, and I have been feeling rather unsettled for the last few days and what I have been feeling is how anxiousness is draining for my body, and I feel how my adrenals are having to work very hard to stay on top of things – and I agree with you, coming back to the stillness within is a great, simple medicine we can choose to take any time of day.
It is no mistake that I was guided here this morning to read this blog again. This time it speaks to me of the simplicity in connection and that connecting to God and myself is not some far out exploration or transcendence. It’s a very simple movement to be with yourself in a moment and knowing that we are part of a much bigger picture then our minds allows us to believe at times. Thank you Michelle.
Thankyou Michelle, this line really was highlighted for me “This ‘stop’ has now become part of my daily ritual, a powerful way to surrender and reconnect to the wisdom of my body, and the wisdom and presence of God.” I also appreciate the Gentle Breath Meditation and what it offers me in reconnecting to myself, to my body, and feeling what’s truly going on for me. Unlike most meditations I can take the gentle breath into my daily life which has given me a new supportive way to be. When I lose myself in the stresses of life the gentle breath is so easy to do to bring myself back to my stillness, or at least stop the stress from getting worse!
That tension that creeps up on me, is also the same thing that stops me from feeling God, from being in touch with the magic that is all around all the time.
This is such a valuable blog Michelle. This anxiousness is something that nearly all of us experience, though some go to anxiousness more often than others – using it as a go-to place. I am one of those who has gone to anxiousness frequently. But now having felt the beauty of the stillness and the expansion and well-being that comes with that, I do not visit anxiousness nearly so often. I can now handle several really difficult things or things going ‘wrong’ in a day now, whereas in the past just one of those things would have sent me crazy. Now I can look at them and say yes I can go there and face it, it won’t be too bad!’ and in fact life feels really beautiful.
The idea of having stop moments built into our day to confirm the connection to self and God, is a lovely foundation and support. It seems anxiety can be partly the lack of loving foundation and care. Knowing that we are deeply loved and allowing ourselves to feel this is important.
Thank you Michelle. I love feeling how much understanding you brought to yourself when you realised that anxiousness was present in your body. Your sharing makes it clear to me that we can only understand what is really going on for us when we take the time to connect to ourselves.
It is always a powerful thing to do, to pause and reflect and connect… Feeling our connection with divinity brings a sense of balance and harmony and trust that humanity hungers for, seeks everywhere, but will always only find it within.
Amazing blog Michelle. I found myself suggesting what you would be anxious about, change of jobs, relationship issues, money problems…. but no it was about “surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God.” Wow! Yes I can relate very much to this. In my day I often look just at the practical, physical things of life yet ‘forget’ about God and myself as being divine in essence and truth. Thank you for sharing and thus reminding me.
“I have been trying to keep myself less than what I truly am” I can very much relate to this, and feel how harming and irresponsible it is.
” letting go of being in control” this is an interesting line that stood out for me, obviously some control things to look at. But it’s got me pondering why do we use control in the first place, as a form of protection, to make us feel safe, I feel it’s the latter, but really it’s like being confined in a corset or straight jacket, instead of letting out the fullness of our joy and expression. Control can come in many minute forms and details.
I can feel a lot of my anxiousness derives from work – as I am reacting to what I feel and see and hence taking it on, rather than calling out the energy that’s being chosen. For example someone may be walking or talking in anger, but not outwardly displaying it, or the kids may be feeling a lot of sadness, I’m feeling it, but reacting to the behaviour chosen to cover it or not feel it, instead of bringing awareness and understanding. It’s much more simple to observe it, and in some cases allow it to play out and not get involved, if need be.
It’s interesting as over the past month I have felt an palpable anxiousness in my body as I have never done before, it can be very uncomfortable at times, what I have noticed is that after an Esoteric Yoga Session or when I am focusing on one thing at a time this anxiousness does not feel to be there. It seems to be when I am not putting pressure on myself or trying to live up to how I think I should be, an image in my head, or letting myself check out in my thoughts and be distracted – then that anxiousness is not there. So as you say “I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God,” my feeling is I am anxious about surrendering to myself.
I can relate to this Merrilee, of looking for a snack when I feel anxious.
Totally MW and Merrilee. As I look back I realise that food was one of my biggest medications, and I didn’t see it for a long time because I always took care to eat ‘healthy’ food.
Anxiousness (which feels like a constant shuddering throughout the body) is something very much so in my face at the moment, or more specifically in my hips that then goes throughout the body. Believing that I can’t the love that I am is being exposed for the disturbance that it truly is. The symptoms are not something I am a victim of, simply my body telling me that choosing to not be who I truly am creates disharmony in the body. “When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big” – thank you for this line Michelle, coming back to my body – which is from where God speaks and not from the words in our minds – I feel quiet strongly and as you shared through being with your gentle breath is the way to address this disturbance of not being our true selves.
Its’ very powerful Michelle when we place these things into our daily rhythm so that they then form part of our unwavering foundation: “This ‘stop’ has now become part of my daily ritual, a powerful way to surrender and reconnect to the wisdom of my body, and the wisdom and presence of God.”
If we immediately feel the presence of God when connected to our innermost then could it be that it’s not that we don’t trust God but that we don’t trust ourselves to maintain that connection as he is forever omnipresent and never gives us more than we are capable of handling.
‘ To saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. ‘ Beautifully said Michelle and a lovely reminder to take into my day thank you.
I love these words Michele, thank you for the reminder “When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of. My days are simpler, fuller, joyous, and my connection to God is felt within and reflected in everything around me.”
This is so timely for me at the moment because I’m about to start a major change of circumstances in relation to work, and this is super supportive for me not to get ahead of myself but simply to remember to connect to my gentle breath and stillness and inner knowing within.
If we stop to feel our stillness, we can also recognise how infinite the love God has for us is. It is so easy to trust what our path will be when we come from this knowing stillness.
Great reminder, to be checking in with the body all the time, if not living from what it shows all of the time…those thread of anxiousness, can lay dormant for years, driving behaviour and without connect to them deeply we don’t grow.
A great read Michelle and reminder that trust is needed as that anxiousness you talk of is something I experience to quite a heightened degree, creating worry about the future and how I need to make things pan out, when trust is a much better way to allow things to unfold, committing only to the quality in the way I do things.
Love it Michael well said. There is no escaping how in truth we are living as ‘our body will always tell us the truth.’ The mind only leads us to believe that we are. There is much wisdom to be discovered through our bodies.
Yes so true that our bodies will tell us the truth, the other day I was in a situation that I thought I was handling then afterwards I wanted to eat to dull down and not feel what was going on. I ‘thought’ I was okay but my reactions were showing otherwise.
Beautiful words Rachael and so true – ‘Everything is there for us, to reflect and support what we need to evolve and to understand what is in the way of us living as the true Sons of God we are.’ We are a complete Divine package designed for the purpose of allowing the Light of God to shine through.
This is a deeply beautiful reflection to come back to Michelle, of the ever-presence of God that is within each and every one of us, whenever we choose to surrender to this and accept this. We all are born with what is needed to walk and live Soulfully, as our bodies are our best guide in reflecting the truth to us whenever we choose to listen. Developing an honest relationship with our bodies is vital, as it is through the stillness of our bodies that we can discover the innate wisdom of God that resides within us all, and it is also through our bodies that we can live and breathe wisdom in the world. This beautifully revealed through the power of our breath.
And it is so simple isn’t Michael, to simply tune into our bodies, and therein lie the answers.
We actually have to be honest, to stop and feel the anxiousness that we ALL carry, and it is from this stopping and feeling that we can start to make the choices that will help us to let go, heal what hold the anxiousness , and feel the love of God within the stillness.
Michelle a beautiful reminder for me this morning of how I bring in anxiousness to avoid feeling my next point of evolution.
Thank you for sharing this powerful reminder Donna as this is something I also recognise I do. I am discovering more and more the beautiful warm embrace of God that is present within when we surrender to Love, of knowing that we are always held in His Love and as such always called to simply be and live all that we are.
Michelle this was beautiful to read this morning ‘I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.’ I can so relate to this sentence and as I read your blog I felt my body begin to surrender. Saying yes to trusting in my connection to God is still a work in progress and for me connecting to my gentle breath and moving in gentleness are a huge support.
This is a wonderful blog Michelle, I am very aware lately of the tension I hold in my body, and can feel that a huge part has to do with accepting and trusting in the connection with God. Letting go of control of life is a big thing and feels as if it is a great step into returning to what we truly are, Divine beings.
Having presented in communities for many years simple techniques of reconnecting with their bodies stillness voices and hearts, the most common re-occurring theme is that when people do stop and feel, how much tension and anxiety is lying just beneath the surface… It really is wonderful to address this because this tension and anxiousness is affecting us all the time.
Thank you Chris for sharing your observations, it’s so true. We all experience tension and anxiousness and the more we are honest about it the more we give ourselves the opportunity to come to understand why this is happening. I have experienced that taking moments to stop, connect to our breath and feel our bodies is a great way to discover what running us in the background.
Great point Chris and then the choices we make often mask how we are feeling so it can be easy to live in a way where we are no longer aware of the anxiousness and as you say its not until we drop that we are able to feel the tension that is there and then let it go.
Thank you Michelle I really loved reading your blog, I too have lived with this anxiousness wanting things to be a certain way , being in control, When I choose these stop moments with the Gentle Breath Meditation I am brought back into stillness, life then has a flow to it and I can feel more clearly the choices I have been making.
‘I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.’ Control has been and sometimes still is a huge thing for me in my life, resulting in lots of headaches and migraines. This is not the case anymore because of getting to know my gentle breath and thus my connection with God but what I felt while reading your blog I can take this deeper as getting anxious is still a very familiar feeling. Thank you for the inspiration to observe my anxiousness to be able to let it go.
Recently I have been experiencing more anxiousness than I have felt in a long time, and I realised that I had taken my connection to me and my breath for granted. It’s like I reached a point that I was comfortable with and cruised along from there, comfortable and happy to be free of old woes. There is no cruising though and there is no stopping as we are always in a cycle. So I feel the anxiousness was the effort it was taking to resist the next step, the next stage of development… because I don’t know what it will be or how it will go. This is a lack of surrender to God as you describe Michelle. It was so worth reading your blog to understand this. Thank you.
The Gentle Breath Meditation has been instrumental in enabling me to reconnect to my inner self, in a matter of minutes, it offers me stillness and through that stillness I am able to feel the true love I have within myself.
Michelle I love the way you have come to the realisation that when you feel the anxiousness in your body, you are making yourself feel smaller when things feel too much, when in truth we are so much more, when we are connected to the all, there is no limitation to our capacity to serve humanity.
‘ In truth, I have been trying to keep myself smaller and less than what I truly am – a Son of God, equal in all love and glory to him.’ – I love what you share here Michelle, letting go of control in my life and has been key to me deepening my relationship with God and feeling the warmth and support that is always there.
I couldn’t agree more with you Rachael, control really is a plague. We are huge beings, godly beings and yet there is so much control to keep it all in, to keep it human. I’ve had the mental image of control being something that is constantly focused on or a nasty force looming over a person – but it can be subtle too, like how we hold our shoulders while expressing, how we move our body, rub our eyes in a rough manner – that’s controlling and saying ‘you don’t/your eye doesn’t, deserve to be treated with gentleness or respect’.
That’s great Rachel, control is the antithesis of the trust… And we can feel that control all the way through our bodies, and learning to let go of the hold that that control has upon us is definitely the start of starting to really trust.
This is such an important point you make Michelle… ‘It never ceases to amaze me how simple it is to get a sense of clarity when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s breath.’ If we lived by this it would put an end to arguments, From that stillness is not only a sense of clarity, but it is also impossible to hold something against another and impossible to hold onto a stance of ‘being right’. Each of these requires a breath that is NOT gentle, and hence not still either. It is so simple… one has to wonder why we would choose anything else.
Exactly Jenny, and it is precisely that simplicity so confounds the mind that just loves complexity, and is definitely uncomfortable with simplicity and all that it brings
Yes cjames, having that simplicity and gentleness of breath as a base bypasses the usual complications the mind likes to run with… it cuts any potential for argument off at the pass.
I relate to this sentence “Trying to control life has therefore been about making it seem smaller and manageable” – When really who said that life has to be small and manageable, when I am connected I am open to everything coming as and when it needs to.
Michelle on re-reading this blog the meaning of your words ‘Trying to control life has therefore been about making it seem smaller and manageable. In truth, I have been trying to keep myself smaller and less than what I truly am – a Son of God, equal in all love and glory to him.’ dropped deeper. I keep myself small (and in the illusion of being safe and in control) rather than surrendering to the huge glory that I am a big player in. Thank you.
Beautifully said. When we can allow ourselves to fully meet and embrace each moment at our best and not make ourselves smaller, just because we cannot see the outcome. That is a great moment to celebrate ourselves.
Well said hartanne60, it’s much more powerful to realise we make the choice to be small and in that feel the consequences. I like your line “surrendering to the huge glory that I am a big player in”!
You have inspired me to set aside space to stop and connect to God each day Michelle. Thank you.
Me too Leonne, especially when I read this line – “When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of.” When we are with ourselves and not in doubt, the world is a better place.
So true Fiona, and it was this distinction of the difference between Spirit and the Soul, that was for me the no.1 question I had, answered by Serge Benhayon.
Exactly robynjones11, in stillness anxiousness is exposed, in exposure it loses its hold over us, in the steadiness of our stillness it ceases be.
I agree Giselle, because in the steadiness of our stillness there is no room for anxiety. This has certainly been my experience.
This blog Michelle comes as a beautiful reminder for me, as I realise how hard I can make it for myself when I do not make committing to consistently connect to my stillness, part of my everyday.
I agree Giselle… the very simple choice to connect to our stillness and the gentle breath can provide us with an amazing support in our daily lives, in whatever activities we are involved in and whomever we are with.
Its interesting Angela, as for me I find that that still part of me I’ve found feels to be something I know better than almost anything else, so to not consistently connect to it is like leaving part of me behind.
It’s true Angela, I use it at work, before I start a class, at the end of the day and also if I feel I am reacting to what is happening in the classroom. I stop, connect back to my breath. So simple, and such a great tool to observe life.
Dear Michelle for me it was a great support to read your awesome blog. I am too deepening the connection to me. Hence following sentences got me: “I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.” That was exactly what I needed to read and I really can relate to it. Trusting in my connection and surrendering to god in full is now what is needed.
I was really touched by this as it confirms what I have been feeling: “I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.”
Accepting myself in full has been and is a fascinating process. A process that makes it become so obvious that what we meet in life is a reflection of how we are and what we create. The more I accept and love me, the easier and more loving my life and relationships have become.
Stillness is like a jewel offering the glory of its preciousness.
In choosing some anxiousness this week, I have felt to read this blog again to allow me to understand more of what could be behind it. Yes when I try to do it “on my own” there is definitely an anxiousness, to which I need to surrender and to know that I will be supported.
Rediscovering our stillness is extremely precious and freeing as it lets us feel that we are enough just as we are. Such a simple revelation and yet so incredibly profound.
I really wonder what stops me from making this very simple choice that I already know I would very much benefit from.
Hmm I have been travelling with anxiousness for most of my life, this body has only really known that state of being. To return to a stillness of sorts I would use substances and drinks to calm everything down and interrupt the racing state of mind that ruled me. Having sought and found the wisdom of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine – I recognise in me a shift that has certainly allowed me to be more honest about how I am in my every day. Am I still all of the time? No not at all. Is this a constant work in progress? Yes it is and day-by-day I can feel the shifts starting to build a new foundation.
Before I read this blog for the first time a few weeks ago I did`t feel anxiousness in me at all, but I realized that I am a person with a high level of control. I started feeling into that deeply and tried to let go of control in different parts of my life. Then it was there… a deep and huge feeling of anxiousness, which I also felt very often in my dreams in the last weeks. I know that it is already there very long and I can hardly believe that I did not feel that before. I set up a perfect system of patterns that helped me to not feel my anxiousness without even noticing it. Feels somewhat crazy..
The stillness will let us feel that there is nothing to do or reach and that we are enough just as we are. A massive change for many as often life is only made about gaining more and more and more.
We all have anxiousness and tension and it is great… revealing , but great … to realise and understand this because then we have the opportunity to let go, and until then , we are simply holding on to the tightness, in the vain hope that it protects us.
Thank you Michelle for your beautiful blog. I loved what you shared here: “It never ceases to amaze me how simple it is to get a sense of clarity when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s breath”. This has been my experience more so over the last few months through my commitment to connect more deeply to stillness. I discovered that when I come from a place of stillness, there is pure clarity and lightness in all that needs to be done. I also felt how my commitment to life is the highest when I remain connected to that quality of delicateness and tenderness I truly am. In stillness I feel truly connected to God and to the whole of humanity and there is true purpose in all that I bring.
Michelle i simply love rereading your blog and will do many more time. What caught me this times: “Trying to control life has therefore been about making it seem smaller and manageable. In truth, I have been trying to keep myself smaller and less than what I truly am – a Son of God, equal in all love and glory to him.”
Michelle, thank you for this truly inspiring blog. It is a great reminder to make each day, each moment even, about stillness. As you say, “when I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of. My days are simpler, fuller, joyous, and my connection to God is felt within and reflected in everything around me”, and the beauty is that this is our natural way to live.
Yes Anne, a stunning beauty indeed, it boggles my mind how I could spend even one day without that stillness.
“I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.” I can feel this is a very deep awareness to realise. Thank you.
Thank you Amita; it is that simple, all we have to do is to allow the stillness out because the stillness within is who we are and is always there.
I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life. Powerful to read this for the truth it presents on many levels. Thankyou for sharing such an insightful blog Michelle.
I love the ‘stop’ moment you talk about making sure you have. Even the simple things like feeling the wind brush against your skin, is a moment that brings you back to the body, a moment to stop and connect and feel your presence in the world.. These moments do make such a difference in the way you live in the whole day.
Being finely attuned to the body offers so much wisdom and guidance. The simplest little thing has the power to offer so much love, if we choose to take the time to notice. Sometimes the way we look at what is happening around us and within us comes from a belief that we are not enough and so anxiousness arises and separation happens. If we see what is happening through the lens of being all we are, a Son of God, then what is happening becomes a letter from God in loving support of us. Your loving blog has allowed one of those moments – the opening of a loving letter from God – Thank you Michelle.
“When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big”. I love the truth of this expression. Reading it I feel the simple joy and expansion that is available when I choose to surrender to my heart connection with God first.
I love what I offer and share in my workplace, walking down the road, being served in a store etc. by simply being in my stillness, being with me.
And what a gift this is Marcia, and one we each have the ability to offer one another simply by connecting to the divine stillness that resides within and expressing this quality in our everyday. No effort, just simply a surrender.
This is beautiful and true, when we make our day about stillness and our connection to God, there is no anxiousness, nothing is too big. The inner power and beauty creates space and clarity , no space for doubts or uncertainty.
Beautifully shared Amita – it just is.
So beautifully expressed Michelle. Thank you for sharing.
Yes, Jinya, connecting with nature is a great way to feel God all around us, within a natural order that is all-encompassing and pulsating with life. When we feel this, there can be no struggle or anxiousness, only joy.
Michelle I felt strongly pulled towards this brilliant blog today as I too have been made aware that I have had an underlying layer of anxiousness I had not yet felt until very recently when I had a session with an Esoteric Practitioner. It’s just another layer for us to be aware of and continue to choose our own loving connection to God and the inner stillness we all hold. Thank you.
I am also becoming aware of deeper layers of anxiousness, which I sometimes don’t want to feel, yet like you share it just shows that I can go deeper with my connection to myself, to God and my inner stillness.
Yes I forget that I am walking with God at my side every moment of the day. Thanks Samantha for the reminder. Today I will walk with “God and all of me”. And I will walk with him tomorrow as well as the next day and the next…..
“Trying to control life has therefore been about making it seem smaller and manageable.” These words Michelle, really stood out for me. I can feel how sometimes I tighten everything I have to do into a box trying to keep a handle on it all. In this I just create the tension. This form of control of mine comes from me not connecting with my breath which would allow me to feel from my body which activities are priorities and which are not.
It’s amazing how our gentle breath connects us with space which then allows us to feel what our body is showing us. Your article Michelle, reminded me to feel my breath allowing it to be gentle to caress my body and I could feel the anxiousness running. Now all I need to do is surrender in my body with the support of my gentle breath and I can move through the anxiousness back to me, free of the tension.
Sometimes I don’t realise how much anxiousness I have running though my body until I go for a session with an Esoteric Practitioner. Sessions usually bring me right back to my true energy which is so gorgeous to feel.
There will always be things that happen in our daily life which affect our connection to God, but it is reassuring to know that by using the gentle breath we can regain that connection.
It is something important to remember Peter that we are not designed to be perfect and so there is no point setting out to be otherwise we just set ourselves up to fail. It is great to have tools such as the Gentle Breath Meditation (https://www.universalmedicine.co.uk/services/free-audio-library/gentle-breath-meditation) to bring ourselves back.
I had such a limited vision of myself and my life and I spent most of my life trying to control life to make it fit into this picture. It wasn’t until I went to a Universal Medicine presentation that I considered that I was so much more than how I look, or what I do. I now understand that connection is everything.
Gorgeous nicolesjardin and Oliver, the connection with ourselves, with our own divinity is indeed everything!
I am learning that if I make that connection my foundation – no excuses, even if I have a full workload, and a lot of things up in the air – coming back to that connection and putting things in my day that I know support that – helps me realise that I am so much more that what you see.
Me too nicolesjardin, connection is indeed everything and your comment really resonated with me as when I read this blog I could feel how much I can still go into wanting to control things, to have things be a certain way and that I do not fully trust God, it’s changing slowly but there are still times when I go into the anxiousness that Michelle talks of. I know when I let go, I am indeed so much more than I know, and life just flows, so time to stop and feel where I am and how I can support myself to stay connected with me.
“When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of. My days are simpler, fuller, joyous, and my connection to God is felt within and reflected in everything around me.“ This blog inspired me to deepen my connection with God, thank you Michelle.
So many people live in anxiousness they are not even aware they are, I feel it has become an almost accepted way of living in our fast paced lives.
I like your comment,’making my day about stillness’. I’d not previously thought of my connection to myself like that, but it’s a great priority to focus on. I’m going to start tomorrow morning.
Liane- what you write is hot! ‘Perhaps the overwhelm that we feel when it all gets too ‘big’ and too much, comes from the fact that we are not living the ‘bigness’ that we actually are.” and “Know who you are and by virtue of this, you will know who you are not.”
This has been exactly how I have come to identify when I have become anxious, by re-familiarising myself with who I am, the steadiness of who I am reveals the agitation of anxiousness and I am able to understand why it has arisen and the falsity of who I am not that was starting to outplay in my body. The Universal Medicine modalities and Gentle Breath Meditation have been instrumental in re-connecting to who I am.
Thank you Caroline you sharing just how common anxiousness is. I was one of those people that was highly anxious in many situations and had no idea I was and did not display the common physical characteristics associated with anxiousness, in fact if you had asked me I would not have been able to even tell you what it was beyond being nervous. The key point you have explained makes understanding it simple and from my own experience this is empowering as I now not only detect anxiousness far faster and more easily I can also manage and shift it out of my system (my body) too. These days I can catch anxiousness sneaking in when I have more to do than I feel time to do it in and with a little awareness I can call it for what it is.
Ray, such a treat to read how you explain this in your words and clearly so. It is an insidious habit (of mine and others) to place more significance on one thing over another. I can feel within I even want to compartmentalise this and say okay all of these things – x, y, and z are equally important and these ‘other’ things are less so. The popular and somewhat cultural notion of goal setting is another underhanded way we can go through life making one thing more significant than another. I have lived much of my life placing importance on a few things to the detriment of many other aspects and can verify it creates pressure, anxiety and makes life a right spin.
Michelle re-reading your blog and letting myself feel about the letting go and surrounding I can also feel an underlying anxiousness or holding. What you raise hits the mark as I also experience that as soon as I be honest about why I am anxious, by allowing myself a moment to stop and feel rather than carry on hoping it will go away, my body relaxes as I’m no longer fighting against myself. Yet this is not one choice but something I find I have to keep choosing as there are always things in the world that feel horrible – if I am honest with this whilst they still feel horrible the anxiousness is not there and I feel much more still with myself. A great blog for reflecting on.
Wow what an epic blog, it has really shown me how far I have to go in my relationship with God and the trust that he is always there. There are moments when I absolutely cannot deny it, but this is not the norm from moment to moment, definitely something to work on. I love that you have put little rituals into your day to support this relationship.
Michelle- I love your honesty and beautiful sharing about your relationship with God. I could totally relate to you. I too at times “find it difficult to fully accept and appreciate God in my life – yet he accepts me unconditionally! I am slowly but surely learning to accept that I am a Son of God and I can reflect his love every day”. When I feel the divine beauty and love that I am within- from doing esoteric yoga in the mornings I am then reminded of the magic of God’s connection, and who I am, reflected my nature around me eg a beautiful fluffy white feather appearing out of nowhere.
That feeling you describe of anxiousness in letting go of the control of life and letting God in is one that I can feel is a biggie, Michelle. Or, to put it more honestly, it is one that I can feel I am holding onto as a big deal. The choice itself is not hard, but there is an identity there with knowing what to do next, making my own decisions, etc. etc. etc.
But the truth is that the decisions I make are all based on two choices: to be with myself (and therefore God), or to not be with myself (and therefore not God).
Beautiful, Victoria. The beautifully divine paradox of stillness in action. It is such a counter to the cliche image of finding one’s self sitting in quiet contemplation in a cave somewhere. Divinity is in living the divine every day in our everyday.
Beautiful……things will unfold according to divine timing. Taking a big deep breath while I write this…letting go….there is a timing for everything.
I am amazed at how much the gentle breath can ease so much tension. I find it particularly helpful if I am starting to get wound up about something. By refocusing my mind on my breathe it has a very calming and stilling affect.
Yes, well said shevonsimon. We have all the tools to bring ourselves back, and the breath is always there reminding us that we live within the body of God.
It is very powerful to feel how your moments of reconnection to feel your stillness and God inside is always a very very simple choice and is always with you all of the time. God is really not that far away even in the moments we feel so deeply disconnected from him.
“I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.” I can relate to this anxiety with letting go of control. I know I can surrender though as I am not really in control anyway no matter how I try. I am just in control of how I respond to life and the quality that I choose to live by.
‘It never ceases to amaze me how simple it is to get a sense of clarity when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s breath.’ Thank you Michelle, it truly is that simple.
This represents a quantum shift that, rather than being something out of reach, is at our fingertips all the time. Living life connected to and with our bodies means we have a forever guide along side us. Being open to what is being shared is our forever learning.
christophschnelle I would go further and say for me it is not being willing to deal with my awareness, I have recently felt anxiousness and the reasons why have been there staring back at me but I have been unwilling to look at them, as if they are too obvious to be the reason and go looking for something far more complicated when in fact it is quite simple and easy to read and understand if the willingness is there to reflect and consider the feelings that arise.
A beautiful reminder to make the time to have stop moments throughout my day – thank you Michelle.
And more to the point, whilst stop moments are important for us to check in with ourselves, what if life is such that we cannot take a stop during the day, for that is surely the case for many. What if we lived instead with the knowingness of our connection in all that we did, that all our movements were done in the grace of stillness? Would we still need as many stop moments to re-connect? This is not to understate the importance of having moments to regather ourselves during the day. If our life is hectic, or if we find ourselves getting caught in the momentum of the day, such moments are super important. But if we end up relying on those moments to keep us connected, what is that saying to us about the way we live the rest of the time? Connection is our life-blood, our source of energy, and so it is most interesting that as human beings we do not give much awareness to what is giving us the energy to get through the day. Enter the teachings of Universal Medicine…
Brilliant question Adam Warburton – ‘What if we lived instead with the knowingness of our connection in all that we did, that all our movements were done in the grace of stillness?’ Choosing that which supports stillness to be our constant.
There is a relationship that is beginning to blossom. Even though this relationship between me and God has always been there, as it is with everyone, it is evolving. The subtleties are much more obvious, the signs are brighter and the activity is clear. The more I connect to the love within me, it is hard to deny what is now becoming absolute in his presence and a relationship that is both exquisitely delicate and powerful.
Michelle I truly believe that the vast majority of the world’s population live with anxiousness and probably most aren’t aware of it as it has become their default setting. My anxiety became so bad that I needed support for it. Even though I had known that I had had bad anxiety I had thought that it was in bouts throughout the day but when I became anxiety free I realised that I had been living with it constantly.
Anxiety is a epidemic in the world today, and one that many accept as a ‘normal’ part of everyday life.
Great point Alexis, “I work better under stress,” Coffee, sugar, alcohol, help me control it or so we’ve been told. I wonder if they are more than half of the problem.
Jenny, where I have been working in the past, the majority of clients are medicated for anxiety. They don’t question at all their anxiety, and neither do their medical practitioners, but just put them on medications to control it. The epidemic will only continue while so many accept anxiety as a ‘normal’ part of life, when it is not natural to who we are.
This is a timely blog and comment Vanessa as I have recently been noticing how superficial I can keep my connection to my body, so I might notice and honour the basics such as thirst, warmth and rest with more consistency than ever before but I can also ignore my reactions that are then held as a tension and often not noticed until my behaviours start to alter. I might look to foods that I wouldn’t if connected, I might struggle to focus and stay present in many ways so I might run late, get behind on emails and/or shut down my expression. When I stop and I am willing to feel my body more I too am amazed by what I have been numb to so I came to the same conclusion – deal with what gets me out of sorts. What can get me out of sorts can be obvious and understood but when this is not the case dealing with the seed of disconnection from disconnection is like a cat chasing its tail – ridiculous, hilarious and maddening if you are the cat! So re-connection makes more sense than trying to deal with things from disconnection. Thanks Michelle and Vanessa for sharing on being consistently committed to connection.
The other day I was sleeping during the day, just having a short cat-nap and I became so still and completely ‘warm and fuzzy’ so-to-speak, it felt breath-taking. When I woke and shared with my girlfriend what this felt like, the only way I could describe it was to say: ‘I felt like it was to be God’. Oh how the stillness we are, is available, if we choose to foster this quality!
I remember Oliver, once I woke in the middle of the night aware of the exquisite stillness I was in connection with. As I moved my body to roll over the stillness was so still and quiet, if I had been lying in an ocean of water there would not have been one ripple from the move. At the time I thought…this is how it must feel for Serge (Benhayon) when he moves his body… I knew at that point that I was the same as Serge and had the potential to make the same choices. I’m yet to commit to that in full, but maybe it’s only a breath away….
I love how your this feels to read, and the loving supportive foundation it is: “When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of. My days are simpler, fuller, joyous, and my connection to God is felt within and reflected in everything around me.
Thank you Michelle for sharing a truly beautiful and inspiring blog. I am at the moment gaining a deeper insight into the anxiousness I am feel in my body from time to time, I am learning to let go more and trust, and connect to the deep love of God that resides within me.
Michelle I totally get what you are sharing here. The control that you speak of and not truly surrendering to the Son of God that I am, that I have felt and is becoming stronger – the more I accept it in full, all of the time, I get to feel that this is actually my natural quality to be living my life in. Those behaviours and habits that I have lived for so long are breaking and falling away and it feels super freeing being All of who I AM. The gentle breath is an amazing tool and support for deepening this connect and I am forever grateful to Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine for introducing such a simple, powerful yet profound technique.
I have felt anxiousness in my body like a juddering that comes from deep inside, it affects my breathing and the thought processes that I have. I find that I am not able to get anywhere fast enough or sit still due to the fear that is racing through my body. Anxiousness is, for me, a terrible state of being and I always used to think it was something that happened to me, until I realised that it is actually something that I choose – mainly as a way to protect my self and to not have to take responsibility for myself in any given situation.
Thank you Michelle – there are a lot of jewels in what you have written. The first one that stands out is in the power of nomination. It never ceases to amaze me how when I stop and connect I actually know exactly what is going on and as soon as I nominate it I am freed from the imposing energy. It never fails to work. However the next step is to actually LIVE what I have now understood because even though I may have understood it, it has not yet become the EXPERIENCE of my body which may have had a life time of living the opposite!
Very true Victoria. For me, tension and a level of anxiety come in when I am not allowing the flow of life, when I bring myself into the equation and do things how I think things should be or try to make them go the way I want them to. If I allow life to unfold and present itself to me, I remain in stillness and what is possible never ceases to blow me away. The anxiety comes when I try to control, even on a very subtle level.
When I became aware of the anxiety I was living with I had to come to terms with the fact that I was choosing the anxiety as a way to avoid my awareness. I could hide in the anxiety and it served me in that way. When I chose to let it go, I had to accept more of myself and my levels of awareness.
Very good point Christoph. I used to have quite a lot of anxiety and as I became more accepting of myself, the anxiety went away.
I keep coming back to this blog as I just love what you have shared it is so touching and inspiring, breath and surrender.
This is so important Francisco. Having a marker to show us that it is time to reconnect back to what is truly ourselves and letting go of all the stress and ideals. Just being and joyfully sharing all of us.
I have this same experience Vanessa, I am very aware that I override easily what I feel and pretend it has not been there but my body is speaking another language and tells me very loud and clear that I am not honest and that’s it is time to get to this honesty and even truth about what I choose in my daily life.
I have enjoyed feeling the surrender in your blog Michelle. very inspiring, thank you.
Thank you for this beautiful blog Michelle. ‘I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.’ This makes a lot of sense to me. Choosing anxiousness gives me the ticket to escape my connection with God. The stillness and gentleness that I feel when I connect to the breath also never fails to amaze me. I am inspired by your blog to honour this more by appreciating the moments I take to connect in the day and by really feeling the impact on how I connect with others, the qualities I bring and how I feel when I do this.
Reading what you wrote Michelle about trying to control life by making everything smaller and manageable, including making oneself less than a son of God was a revelation to me. I do this all of the time under varying titles such as prioritizing, coping and even self-love. This won’t be so easy to get away with now – thank you.
This feels very true christophschnelle. Choosing anxiousness definitely helps me to not feel what is going on in a situation and gives me a very instant get out. When I choose anxiousness, I also enter into a process of choosing all sorts of behaviours that get used as an antidote to the anxiousness and the effects are devastating on my body and my health. Thank you for reminding me that is a simple and supportive process of ‘learning how to do deal with what we are aware of..’ we know how to deal with it, but it defiitely something we have to re-learn and being aware of the learing makes it more loving, gentle and fun
I could also feel my body drop as I read your words that God is always with me, within me.
Sitting and choosing to deeply connect with ourselves is not something we may choose to do often. Others may seek to do it to try and find something, or get somewhere. The concept of ‘connecting’ to ourselves might seem quite foreign to some as they are not aware a separation has occurred in the first place. I was certainly like this, and now have a marker in myself of what it feels like to be connected and ‘with’ myself, or not. This learning has taken place over a number of years, and is something forever deepening as I make the space to stop, connect and feel what is happening in my body.
The reading of your sharing Michelle was for me like having a healing session. Thanks for increasing my awareness relating anxiousness and our connection to god.
On re – reading your blog, the piece that spoke to me this morning was your relating how you began to bite your nails again. I used to bite my nails and remember how when I read books or watched films with suspense I would find myself biting my nails, showing me my underlying anxiousness which I didn’t recognise as such at the time.
“I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.” I’ve been reflecting on this and its a really interesting way of looking at anxiousness and life. The fact that I’ve come to also understand is the more we try to make an outcome a certain way, the more tension and stress we actually hold in our body.
“When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big”. This is a very inspiring line, Michelle. It helps me to see the clear choice I am making in each moment – to feel my connection to God in everything I do, or loose myself by not honouring who I am and what I am a part of.
‘I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.’ This control is something I recognise in myself, not fully trusting what I feel inside, not completely ready to surrender. Your words have reminded me to reconnect with the stillness and to allow myself to feel more.
It’s great how you highlight anxiousness as being the energy that takes us out of stillness. I experience this when I find myself racing against time. I become anxious that I won’t get everything done, my head becomes full of thoughts and my heart beats faster. I am then no longer in stillness, no longer with myself and no longer with God. This can affect my whole day unless I manage to find a way to come back.
Thank you for this medicine, Michelle. Connecting to the body in gentleness really puts an end to the anxiousness. And having made this experience once, feeling anxious will always be as a marker for the fact that I am not fully with myself. Now I can see it more as a friend who reminds me of something important rather than something that I have to fight against.
This is so powerful for you and all who read your blog Michelle. From these moments of stillness we can find our connection to God, it’s there within us all. It is quite incredible that we go around in our day in anxiousness and not notice it, but when we do realise that, we can come back and reconnect in an instant, when we have a marker of the stillness to return to.
Thank you, Michelle. What I heard loud and clear in your article was a commitment to building back a relationship with God that you know absolutely is infinite, but that you also understand, tenderly so, is something you need to build your body back to it, having avoided this knowing and connection for some time. A really inspiring support in the appreciation of the incremental steps we can all take on this return to the warm embrace of God that we all yearn.
Reading this blog gave a clearer understanding of anxiousness and how subtle and insidious it is. Anything that I identify with as being more than or less than my innermost truth, can create an anxiousness around how to move forward in life and it is really an irresponsibility of my spirit to choose this way of being, as the innermost is always there, as is the quality of stillness I can choose to connect with and appreciate, this is who I am.
It is great what you have shared here Katerina about building a way of living, which I also found inspiring about what Michelle spoke about developing in her blog. When we commit to taking moments in our day to connect with the quality of breath – we are building that foundation of love which allows and supports that stillness.
What I have noticed is that the more I am actually living with stillness and presence and not indulging in the thoughts that seem to constantly remind me how many things I have to do, the more time I actually have to get things done! Following the lead from my body and honouring it’s rhythm (what it is telling me), seems to create so much more space and time in my day – it feels magical, but really, it is just learning about a different way to understand my relationship with time. I am enjoying reading the book Time by Serge Benhayon as part of my learning. There is a great article about it here http://www.unimedliving.com/publishing/unimed-publishing-books/time-space-and-all-of-us/time-space-and-all-of-us-book1-time.html
It is amazing how we can get clarity when we connect to the stillness of our own breath. But isn’t it interesting that we do find it amazing! This understanding – the power of our breath – should be normal for us. This learning should be the first thing we are taught when we go to school, or from our parents, until it no longer needs to be taught, because it is just how we all live from birth until death.
It is beautiful to hear how you have committed to making a stop moment each day to remember who you truly are – simply by connecting to your breath and feeling the deep knowing that is the connection with God. Thank you for your inspiring words and story Michelle.
I have loved re-reading this powerful blog Michelle. These words stood out to me: ‘My understanding of where the anxiousness comes from has also deepened so that I am now aware that at times life, or what is being asked of me, feels “too big, too much”. Trying to control life has therefore been about making it seem smaller and manageable’.
This is a great exposure of the particular dynamic or vicious cycle of control and overwhelm, control and overwhelm, and the illness that it brings to the body. I recently re-experienced this pattern when asked to to fit ‘one more thing’ into my week. Eek! After an initial squirming and protesting within I called on a friend who I knew would help me not magnify that reaction. Within days, after surrendering, a miracle of outworking and constellation happened in my life. Huge learning! This is true education.
Love this Lyndy because that ‘squirming and protesting’ has become a ‘friend’ to me these days, since I now what is being offered up is an opportunity to learn.
I know this feeling Lyndy – and the worst is when you try and control the overwhelm! Instead of stepping back and accepting where the line of ‘enough’ draws, we can sometimes dive in and try and sort everything out and find solutions… This never works! I find that in those situations it’s about creating space and focusing on one thing at a time.
How powerful and beautiful this is Michelle, “When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of. My days are simpler, fuller, joyous, and my connection to God is felt within and reflected in everything around me.” You have expressed so well what I feel is true for me too. Thanks for putting the words together that confirm me in my stillness and connection to God and everything around us.
I find it so easy to get caught in the momentum of everything that is going on around me and only realise this has happened hours later when I stop the activity and feel how tired, achy or on edge I am at the end of the day. It is a great advise to commit to moments of stop during the day, feel what is happening if required, and re-connecting or deepening the stillness we feel. And taking this wonderful quality into our day
Yes I agree Golnaz – Stillness is indeed a wonderful quality of the Soul and available to all of us. There are some great quotes and free audio about Stillness here: http://www.unimedliving.com/unimedpedia/word-index/unimedpedia-stillness.html
I loved this line too Helen it does indeed sum it all up – the first time I did the gentle breath mediation was a revelation, so amazing!
I love this blog it is very inspirational, my take home message is “When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of” When I embark on a new program “can I do this” comes up for me but when I deeply connect to my stillness and God I know I can because all that I need is provided for me.
This is the most precious of blogs and a great sharing. Exactly what I needed to connect too, I love how that happens! I have been feeling to do what you have been putting into place with regular check in’s to accept that their is the love all around us if we let go and allow ourselves to feel it.
That is a very good point Hannah, and most of us carry a tension and are unconscious of it. Is it because it is so normal or because we want to avoid the clarity? Perhaps both (big mistake) it is so empowering to connect to the breath, and through stillness allow the truth to be revealed as Michelle has explained.
“it is so empowering to connect to the breath, and through stillness allow the truth to be revealed” – written with the clarity and power of your lived experience – thank you Bernard!
“It never ceases to amaze me how simple it is to get a sense of clarity when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s breath.” It is indeed amazing what is revealed when we are fully prepared to be open and honest with ourselves, knowing the truth might be hard to swallow, but it is needed for our development.
Thank you Michelle, very beautiful words. Letting go of the control is simply surrendering to a fuller, deeper and connected part of ourselves . ‘As soon as I was clear on what I was anxious about and called it out, I felt myself drop into a very deep stillness, I felt held in an embrace so warm and loving and had an absolute sense of knowing that God is always with me, within me.’
Great understanding of anxiousness Carolien, thank you, so simple and it makes so much sense. The moment I feel anxious I can then ask myself: what do I have to do or be right now other than simply being me?
Yeah, great comment Carolien, I am also playing with that, as in not thinking what will be the next thing to do, but letting the next thing come to me. So basically you let life come to you and let it unfold in front of you instead of moving towards it which then has a control in it.
I love coming back to this blog as it has such a profound message that I can hear every single day: nothing is too big, no need for anxiousness nor doubts, just all of me and knowing that God is always there. What else do I need?
Once we truly let go of this pressure to control our lives and instead trust and surrender to what life has to offer, we will realize how absurd the thought of being able to control life was. Such magnificence in all its fullness can and will unfold, but will never be controlled.
“I realised I still find it difficult to fully accept and appreciate God in my life – yet he accepts me unconditionally!” – I love this line…how many conditions we put on our ‘worthiness’ of something that unconditionally available and NOT at any cost other than being who you truly are and deeply want to live.
So true Cathy, I am learning to let go of my picture on how I think my life should look or the direction I think it needs to go. I am learning to connect more deeply with the hierarchy and to surrender to what ever is my next point of evolution.
Good point Lindell. I wouldn’t be on this web site if I had settled for the tiny picture.
Up until recent years I had no idea I was anxious most of the time because it had been there my whole life and was so familiar I thought it was me a part of me. These days through being more aware through connecting to my body I feel anxiousness when it is there in my body and am able to call it out and as you say Michelle call it out and drop in a deep stillness in my body.
This is a beautiful expression of how to feel deeply where we are at – how we can absolutely know what is needed to support us and how with consistency and appreciation we get the chance to Love ourselves back from many conditions – like this example anxiousness.
Stephanie I too have become much more aware of anxiousness and how I carry it in my body. If I am gripping with my toes I know I am quite anxious, where as if I am feeling flat it feels like there is also a subtle feeling of anxiousness in this as well, as I am not comfortable in this feeling flat and to avoid it I can go into a bit of a drive.
I have found what I once called the gentle breath now feels more to be a tender breath in the way it embraces and emanates throughout the whole of me.
I have been reflecting on lately how we feel within ourselves and the way tis forms how we choose to live our day through the different choices we are willing to make. How we feel within ourselves is of upmost importance and the only way I know to effect this is re-connecting to my body and feeling the flow and rhythm that resides within.
Thank you Michelle – top blog and great to know you are choosing to build and develop a true connection with yourself. I too am doing my best to knock out any anxiousness and doubt which can creep in at times but because I am learning to trust my body so much more it feels like a huge disturbance so I don’t get far into it as I have to deal with it.
My understanding from my own experience has been that there can be layers of anxiousness so when things are still and steady there can be a deeper surrender needed and allowing the space so whatever needs to come up can be addressed and it is done with ease.
A tip I use that is super practical is at night when I go to sleep. I place the palm of my hand just under my ribs in the centre and feel the pulse and that gives me an indicator of what is going on. If it is still and I start thinking about something I can feel that pulse change to a shudder and thats my sign that whatever it was I was thinking about has bothered me and had an affect on my body because the pulse changed.
Michelle thank you for your sharing. Bringing it back the basic of gentle breathing and stillness truly allows us to reconnect within and to God. With this stillness we truly can deepen our clarity. Stillness holds so much power which we under estimate.
I was offering a presentation yesterday for a corporate company and was sharing with them the Gentle Breath Meditation. I was again amazed at how the energy in the room completely shifted after just a few minutes of each person choosing to breathe their own gentle breath. It is that simple, stop, choose to breath gently, return to the body and in this we return to God.
I have had a similar experience to this Donna. It is amazing to feel the quality of spaces change when people make choices to be themselves through the quality of their breath. It makes me realise what we are generally breathing is not us! I have noticed changes can be made by how we choose to walk, move and speak too. The quality of our movements, for which our breath is one, also can inspire a change.
Michelle – your blog has come at such the right time, as I have been travelling around Europe, visiting places and connecting with relatives that I have not met before. I too have been feeling an underlying “anxiousness about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God.”
For me it’s about trusting and knowing that ‘I am enough ‘just the way I am- not needing to prove anything. By stopping throughout the day, breathing my own breathe, and feeling the divine connection within, as a warmth of pulsating love, I reconnect to truth, and anxiousness no longer exists.
As I have been reflecting upon surrendering to myself and God, this wonderful blog appears. Thanks God and thanks Michelle for reminding me we can choose to be all of who we are not what the world forces us to be.
“When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of. My days are simpler, fuller, joyous, and my connection to God is felt within and reflected in everything around me.” I love this Michelle and can so resonate.
A beautiful and deeply practical way to deal with anxiety and to build a closer relationship with God. I found this blog allowed me to feel how I need to be connecting to that stillness within and to feel what was taking place in my body – and in this way I can build more stillness in my life. Thank you Michelle.
Yes I agree andrewmooney26. I hadn’t connected the two before, but it makes sense that we become anxious if we wish to control an outcome. Surrendering to what will naturally come and not trying to be a certain someone seems a lot simpler and a lot less wasting of our energy.
There is much to ponder upon in your powerful blog Michelle – on re-reading today this paragraph is resonating deeply within me –
“I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life”.
Until attending presentations by Serge Benhayon I had little awareness of how much ‘being in control’ figured so predominantly in my life to keep myself well protected from any perceived harm. Unraveling the control measures has been quite challenging at times, yet also the most amazing and healing with understanding there is a choice to live differently – less control and more love. An ever-unfolding path for sure.
This also reminds me of the power of the sessions with Esoteric Practitioners. We are offered so much and we can go as deep as we choose. Thank you for sharing your willingness and allowing to go to this depth and the reflection it gives to us.
I find this blog so very helpful Michelle, I have the knowledge that I am the son of God, equally as everyone else is, I even believe and know it, but truly accepting it is still some way off I still get caught up in doubt and anxiety when I am not connected to myself. My anxiety is a by-product of holding back my light. Why would I do such a thing?
“It never ceases to amaze me how simple it is to get a sense of clarity when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s breath.” So clear, so succinct, so beautiful, so true.
Thank you Michelle for sharing this simply inspirational blog , it is our choice to be run by all the superficial day to day complexities of our world or to simply connect to our breath and just be and accept we are supported in our father’s absolute love, the very same love we are, and take our next step in that stillness and awareness.
I agree Helen, once you have experienced the gentleness and stillness of your own breath there is no denying the clarity that this brings. And if you haven’t I can only recommend you sample with one of these meditations.
http://www.unimedliving.com/meditation/free
‘When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of. My days are simpler, fuller, joyous, and my connection to God is felt within and reflected in everything around me.’ …… this is so beautiful, Michelle, so complete, nothing more is needed as it is all there already.
When we feel that we are sons of god and our own divinity and the big part we all play for humanity, and stop making ourselves small, separate from others or unworthy, life unfolds with such clarity and simplicity, this brings one true purpose and direction.
This blog is the ‘missing link’ I have been looking for, the connection and surrendering to God and the relationship it has with anxiety, very comprehensive and encompassing article Michelle, I am super appreciative, thank you.
This beautiful blog brings tears to my eyes Michelle. I love the way you didn’t just dismiss the words of your practitioner and bury them, but instead allowed the unfolding of that session to continue afterwards. That is often what happens with a session – there is an unfoldment, an unrolling effect that can take place for two to three days afterwards. and I love the way you took time to feel the anxiousness and to feel what lay under it:
‘As soon as I was clear on what I was anxious about and called it out, I felt myself drop into a very deep stillness, I felt held in an embrace so warm and loving and had an absolute sense of knowing that God is always with me, within me’. Deeply beautiful!
I too have been living with a constant underlying anxiousness – sometimes less noticeable and other times pretty awful. I have mostly attributed this to the way I am being, both with myself and the world, but had not considered that it might have a deeper underlying root cause – that my attachment to control and unwillingness to surrender to the fact I am a Son of God is what continues to feed this cycle. The control comes in with the game I play where I try to imagine how life would be with this or that scenario, this gets me ahead of myself and as I can’t possibly know how it would be, I become anxious. Great blog Michelle thank you. I can feel there is much to be exposed here for me.
Hi Michelle,
Thank you for sharing your story, I love the way you deeply considered the practitioners question when you were asked about anxiety, you could have easily brushed it off but the physical experiment you did was super inspiring. I might add this little gem to my daily routine.
I agree Katerina, its amazing that we actually choose this state of being and call it in. Then have to find the myriad of ways to surppress or numb it!
Michelle, your blog deeply touched me, I’d never related that underlying anxiousness I too can feel to a surrender to God and letting go control (something I am learning to do), but it is. To feel and know that we are held and cared for always, that we are Sons of God and that to hold on, to control to be in anxiousness to fight the natural flow that is there for us. Thank you for reminding me of that connection to God I hold is always there, it never leaves, but I leave it – or think I do, when in reality I can’t, even then I am still with God, just not actively celebrating and building our connection – thank you Michelle for reminding me.
Wow! your anxiousness sounds pretty complicated Michelle. My connection to God is simple, when I close my eyes, I breath gently and feel the stillness. It’s acceptance, of just allowing myself to be and trusting in God. I don’t have to do anything else, I leave that to God.
This is a beautiful blog and one which I will ‘save’ to keep re-reading … I have found it helpful to have anxiousness addressed as, like you say, “What I felt was a deep and long held anxiousness that I’d not let myself feel before.” … I too have the signs of anxiousness like biting nails and nervous tension but have not actually taken the space to ‘go there’ and see what it is about … thank you Michelle, for taking the space to feel and then put it into words.
Wow, thank you Michelle. Could this be the source of all anxiousness, the fact that we are terrified of surrendering to and trusting God’s love? To allow ourselves to trust the divine constellations God creates for our evolution is just a choice and one that will set us free from the agony of trying and hoping.
This is a must read for everyone. I never used to consider anxiousness or how much we carry without being aware of it. I am now seeing that it is running in most of us, most of the time, even if we appear to be calm and collected! That appearance is often the veneer created by control, meanwhile our feet are madly paddling under the surface of the water. It is lovely that you have taken your exploration beyond the work stresses and explored your relationship with God and being divine. Often the anxiousness is a reflection of our issues with letting all that power and gloriousness out for all to see.
Doug it still astounds me at times how strong the pull to ‘get things done’ is, even though I know this deep stillness. As I write this I can feel a deep appreciation to Serge Benhayon for sharing that there is more to life than getting the job done so that I have a choice now as to whether I do the job in stillness and connection to myself and God, or with anxiousness and push.
Stillness has brought me to rediscover my relationship with the divine also. Then my connection feels absolute. So why do I choose to step away from it?
This is so timely Michelle; thank you for its gift to support so many of us to understand we hold ourselves back by playing it small. I have experienced a deeper trust and confirmation that God is around us all the time supporting everything which occurs. And yet, when life gets that little bit busier it is still easy to fall into old behaviours and pull on the reins and go into control, instead of claiming the gift it presents – which is God saying – you are capable of representing me in so many areas and here are the opportunities. My cap also is the lack of commitment to supporting myself in my livingness to have a body to live all which is presented. Awesome and thank you. x
Anxiousness can be so subtle and ingrained so deep we aren’t even aware of it – as you so clearly share Michelle. It is far more prevalent than people realise – in fact most people would have anxiousness running in their lives. I would never have called myself anxious before coming to Universal Medicine…sure I was nervous at exam times, starting a new job, or would be stressed or overwhelmed at times – they were the ‘out there’/obvious manifestations of my way of living. However, running like an undercurrent through all of my life was anxiousness – it was behind my every action and every thought, fuelled by a lack of self worth – not feeling enough as who I am and therefore constantly wanting to fix everything and everyone, constantly calibrating with the world around me so then I would be ok…like a mouse running on a spinning wheel, and a totally exhausting way of living! It is through Universal Medicine and the presentations by Serge Benhayon that I have come to expose all of this and to start to heal the lack of self worth, and the anxiousness is having less and less control in my life.
How inspiring – in every sense of the word 😉 our breath is with us constantly as is our connection to God should we so choose it.
Thank you Michelle – this was a perfect reminder for me this morning to just take a moment to breath. There are times when the anxiousness can be such a strong distraction yet so deviously subtle that we have trouble putting our finger on it. Just as you have experienced, it is in those moments that we allow ourselves to really feel what is going on that we can get a fuller sense of the pull away from the gentleness of the breath and how it is just simply a question of choice – to be gentle or not. And then of course there is the acceptance, of ourselves and the simplicity of it all.
Thank you for this awesome sharing Michelle…since reading it yesterday I have been considering my relationship with God. Before Universal Medicine I saw God as outside of me and blamed him for any problems in my life, but at the same time I could always feel what I called the sound of silence in nature i.e. the stillness that was there. It has only been since reading your blog that I have connected the fact that I have always known God through stillness, and it has been through various esoteric modalities that I have felt that stillness again, but I hadnt related that to being God until now…so…” in the stillness, I am rediscovering the relationship between God and me” once again – thank you Michelle.
What you share Michelle is so relatable, and so very beautiful. Your summary offers such a glorious shinning light, and simply directs us back to our connection: “When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big….”
It basically comes down to that we are either with God or against (without connection to) him, although we may not feel like being against him but anyway we choose a state of being and an energy fills us that separates us from God. Anxiousness being one of the emotional states that expresses such separation.
Its amazing that we have rejected God, what he offers in way of support far surpases anything we could ever provide ourselves, even in our wildest dreams.
When you put it like that Alex one can understand that when we lose connection to God there is an awful lot to be anxious about.
Oh my God ;-), indeed what else is left but anxiousness when we are without connection to the one and only consciousness and beingness that makes us who we are. Without knowing who we are everything else is just a desperate attempt of patchwork.
Very true Alex, it is very black and white like that, just like Jesus said, ‘you are either with me or against me’. It is us who try to make the grey areas, so we can settle for less and say we are doing better than, but better than is not truth, better than is not love. When we start with love as a marker anything but love is not love.
Very well said Alex, we can fool ourselves with grey areas but when we feel what love truly is we see that anything less, even a smidgen is far from love.
A beuatiful account Michelle, one of the things that particularly stood out for me was this –
‘On my way to work, as I sat in the train, I gave myself time and space to connect to my body with the gentle breath so it could reveal to me what was underneath the tension. What I felt was a deep and long held anxiousness that I’d not let myself feel before.’ – this paragraph is gold. How often do we hold onto anxiousness and not let ourselves feel it but rather bury it in all sorts of distractions so we don’t have to feel what is truly going on in the body? And so we don’t have to feel the consequense of choices we have made?
Thank you, Katerina, for making it absolutely clear that anxiousness is a choice and not something we are a victim of although when we are caught in it we feel at its mercy. That raises the question of why do we choose or allow it, what purpose does it serve, why have we made it something so familiar when it is not supportive at all to feel at ease and confident?
Yes, I agree with you Alex and Lyndy. Anxiousness is a very old familiar place to resort to when holding back from feeling the true reason for the underlying tension. Nowadays I can feel this and know I can make a choice – to be with my breath and my body or the anxiousness.
This is a great call, Michelle and I can relate to it feeling like a bit of a leap “…to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. ” We have strayed away so far from this natural truth, that it seems like quite a step to take.
How amazing will it be when we can all live this natural truth as naturally as we take our next breath. So many people can’t even say the word God because it has become so loaded with beliefs and ideals, so we as the Sons of God have a long way to go to come back to our natural connection.
Yes Michelle, I have struggled with the word God and religion because of my perception was that going to church was not ‘cool’ and if you were religious you were a certain type of do-gooder and I did not want to be associated. The ideals and beliefs that we carry are indeed huge but as I begin to trust the truth of God, the truth I felt as a child and feel my connection I am changing my relationship with the words and the judgements and beliefs are falling away.
Thank you for a timely reminder to again surrender to God. As much as the loss of our deep connection with God keeps us feeling anxious, it often is the anxiousness that robs us of our divine union – a very deliberate vicious circle.
Hi Michelle, I read this blog and recognised how I still choose to try to control life. The stillness in your words was beautiful to feel and a tremendous support in feeling the anxiousness present in my body. Thank you
It is a great reminder Michelle, just reconnect to the stillness deep within. I love it.
Thank you Michelle, a great reminder of how we easily we can re-connect to the simplicity of God within us when we choose to feel how gentle our breath is and how still our bodies are. We are so very skilled at abandoning God and leaving this simplicity, thinking that we have to control every aspect of our lives. Serge Benhayon gracefully shares the practical ways to develop and maintain a living connection to God, one he has personally achieved with great mastery and willing shares with all who care to pay attention. Michelle, thank you for taking that moment on the train to do deeper and ask yourself why you were feeling anxious, you have demonstrated that asking the question and listening within for the answer delivers true choice and true resolution.
Rowena you have hit the nail on the head, control and anxiety are twins we can not have one without the other. This is huge….
I had a beautiful reminder this morning as I could feel a tsunami of stress building in me with the huge tasks I had to get through – That I had a choice to continue and be overwhelmed or stop connect and not let that get in the way of letting my divinity out. It worked I stopped and I even had time to go to the Gym.
Yes Nicole I have found being anxious takes up quite a lot of time and energy, and time/space magically appears when I choose to let it go and feel me in the moment I am in rather than in the anxiety of my day ahead.
It’s true Joshua… And how many of our choices are steered by this underlying anxiousness that we are not even aware of?
Is our food, lifestyle, relationship, exercise, work and sleep choices chosen from our connection with ourselves, and therefore stillness; or from anxiousness??
Would we even need certain substances and foods if anxiousness wasn’t running the show? So many foods disturb our stillness, however we cannot identify them and make different choices until we deal with our anxiousness.
I agree Emily, made me want to choose this also. 🙂 True inspiration.
It really is amazing the lengths that we go to, to avoid God’s love and avoid shinning bright as a sun of God.
Michelle thank you so much for sharing how your connection to God and acceptance has deepened it was very beautiful to read.
When I trust in God and in the fact that I know everything I need to know deep within me, a stillness will grow inside me. This stillness no longer leaves room for anxiety, stress or control.
How awesome to have this understanding Katerina. Empowering and liberating indeed.
Can relate to that Jade. Same calling card. The beautiful thing about this story is that it can have an ending if we let go and reconnect back to the stillness and harmony that is naturally within our bodies.
I find that the more intimate the connection and care within and for myself, the more sensitive I become to anxiousness. It is like the bar or marker drops lower and lower and where I once would not have recognised the anxiousness within me, I can feel a low lying sense of it. It is an ongoing process of becoming aware of it and what causes it and letting them both go.
I can relate Lisa. What I’m learning with this is not to freak out when I do feel an anxiousness and try to stop it, fix it… I’m realising that the finer I allow my natural sensitivity to be, the more something that is not in line with this lovely quality will feel quite jarring — and hence the anxiousness that will come up.
Every time I feel anxiousness I can clock that it’s an opportunity to feel deeper in my body.
I too have found this too be true Lisa.
Thank you Michelle, in reading your blog I could see how easy it is for us to go into anxiousness or stress when we make ourselves small or are living less than the beauty and grandness of God’s love that we are. When we are greater than great and bigger than big, we shine brightly in the world and yes, there is nothing too big that we cannot handle.
‘stop each day and take time to connect with my breath and my body; to the stillness and sacredness that is naturally within me.’, what a great thing to do within the day.
From what you describe, I get a real sense of a difference between putting my faith in god as many religions encourage and the surrender you describe that includes you as an equal player in god’s plan.
Yes Joel, I always felt so disempowered at the religious concept of ‘putting my faith in god’ but how inclusive and practical what Michelle has shared is beautiful.
Thank you so much Michelle! Seriously, this blog is exactly what I needed to read right now with a work load that has almost doubled for the next 6 weeks and could feel a little anxiousness creeping in. The beautiful reminder ‘…to stop each day and take time to connect with my breath and my body; to the stillness and sacredness that is naturally within me.’ is so appreciated.
Yes Marika , bring in control and manipulation and the beautiful connection to ourselves and God that we naturally have cannot be there with us.
Gosh Michelle I really understand what you’re saying here and think this could be similar to what I’m not allowing myself to feel…. Very interesting – I will ponder that one! Thanks!!
Absolutely Jane, this is one stunning blog!
The Gentle Breath Meditation is a marvellous tool to reconnect you back to your body and feel what there is to feel. Through this connection I have been able to gradually let go of the anxiousness that was present and begin to feel the beautiful stillness that is forever present. It felt like the anxiousness was sitting on top of the stillness like a lid holding it down. Great to lift that lid.
Developing presence in every movement we make and everything we do is key to developing confidence and trust in ourselves. I love your words Michelle – ‘It never ceases to amaze me how simple it is to get a sense of clarity when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s breath.’
Experiencing anxiousness and this having an effect on our ‘connection’.
A spoonful to swallow, however very true.
I know when I become anxiousness it is slippery slope to no where good. I eat more sugary foods, I feel inadequate and directionless.
I great learning curve for me has been to stop…
When I feel anxious I normally go into ‘fix it mode’ and become busy to solve the problem but all this did was momentary numb the tension.
Instead stopping to feel the source of the anxiousness was far more productive for truly dealing with the issues that were making me highly strung.
Yes, Jane, this stillness and knowing God deeply is the best foundation for every day.
This is yet another trick to keep us separated and as you said Michelle, anxiousness can be so subtle that we don’t even realise it’s there. I have enjoyed your blog and I have learnt a lot about my own anxiousness through reading everyone else’s comments. Thank you.
Thanks Michelle for sharing ,It is truly amazing when we claim true breath back and by act of choice then we get the flow and balance back , what a joy it is to come back to our selves without the anxiety running the show.
Michelle, what you write is such a deep truth – nominating exactly what is going on, just nominating, not anything more at all is needed, can transform us instantly. Suddenly we have a new level of awareness and there may be hiccups afterwards but we have changed for good. For very good!
I love that blog so much, Michelle. You really have touched something deep inside of me and I felt true joy when I read it. Connecting to God and trusting in the divine plan instead of trying to control life to get a false feeling of security is also a big issue in my life. But when I take a stop-moment, I can feel my connection. I really ask myself why we loose it so quickly when it is actually one of the most amazing feelings in the world. We are completely held in light and true love…
Most people carry at least a low level anxiety with them in their daily lives, and infact it is so normal, that people do not even recognise it for what it is. Your blog is quite profound in that it nails what is actually underneath anxiety, and that is the lack of confidence in feeling equipped to deal with all that we are feeling. And so, quite simply, we become anxious as we don’t actually think that we are enough to deal with what is in front of us. And so we go into a rhythm of breath that is not naturally our’s, and this is what creates the anxiety. This is why the gentle breath meditation helps so much in this regard, for it helps us to reestablish and reconnect to the simplicity of our own connection.
That is so simple. tension is natural because we live in a world we have built for ourselves where everything is motion and doing and fast, and so pulls us away from the love of God all the time. How we respond to that tension determines the way we live our lives. If we believe ourselves to be small, then anxiety sets in with “How will I cope?” but if we trust and feel our innate essence where we meet the stillness of God, then anxiety is absent. This is our natural way of being and livable in this world if we choose the stillness that is always there. Beautiful Michelle, thank you.
Me too Catherine, I am also seeing where I still use control in different areas of my life and where I want to decide what is going to happen and how this looks like. It shows me where I still think that life is about me and not about humanity. It is those subtle forms of control that I am seeing now and that have just the same impact as the non-subtle ones hi hi. It is all control, subtle or not subtle.
Beautiful blog Michelle. I can totally relate to your comment – It never ceases to amaze me how simple it is to get a sense of clarity when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s breath. This is so true.
Great illusions you expose there, Lieke: that its not about cutting down on things that creates space, which becomes exclusive, but rather it is about the quality of us in our action / movement that creates space ( and that quality is completely inclusive!) Cool! I didnt know i knew that until I read your comment, Lieke, and responded 🙂
What you write Michelle is such a huge topic, anxiousness affects so many people and I notice I carry anxiousness in almost everything I do. I would describe it as debilitating, this makes modalities such as chakra-puncture so valuable, but also that willingness to stop and connect to how the body feels, that is when the enormity of the potential we all have can begin to be realised.
Reading you blog this morning Michelle and then returning to it this evening, has led me to reflect on the underlying level of anxiousness that I have in my body most of the time. The counter to this is to choose to be more deeply with myself with a quality of gentleness and tenderness. I felt myself dipping in and out of this all day, but having read your blog has inspired me to keep choosing to come back to my body. Knowing that I know God only through this connection.
Reading this blog today I felt a confirmation about moments I have been experiencing lately of being in a flow, with much on my plate and much being attended to in the work day, but not at all with a sense of strain or even effort. The normal mind even thinks at times, “this is strange” as there is no nervousness or exhaustion, yet many things are just getting done. Also in these amazing passages of time, things constellate – a phone call or email from this or that person offering support in the next phase of various projects without lifting a finger to recruit it. Perhaps this is part of the magic of being held in the stillness of God?
I loved reading your blog Michelle. We do carry that anxiety when we forget how held we are by God and how deeply loved we are. What an excellent commitment to stop and connect each day. In the stillness we find clarity.
The question is… Is our fear of losing control really warranted? Or is that part of game to ignore what we already know deep within our bones.
I love that, Liane: “Play big and watch the world expand to the size it always was” It has me laughing in confirmation of its truth!
It’s funny, if we look at this topic in reverse, from the inside out and remember the FACT that we know exactly how the universe works in harmony within all of its parts (simply because we are made of it ourselves, encoded by it) then it follows that at some level we deliberately ignore God in favour of our individuality – the unloving kind of individuality I mean. And that is the stark reality of it. Not said as an invitation to encourage self-punishment (more delay) but as a simple truth. We are always in the driver’s seat opting to ignore what makes us tick in favour of a pimple-sized version of ourselves.
So then what exactly is my potential? And just how much power have I stuffed down in order to (try and) control my life and squeeze into this tiny picture I have settled on as my self?
So true, Lee – isn’t that what we “Science”? That breaking things into little pieces to study it and ‘understand’ it??
Its interesting that so often people don’t even realise the constant tension they feel is actually anxiousness, and that it actually isn’t a natural thing to feel all the time. We don’t create a lot of space for stillness to realise there is actually another way to live.
Very true Rebecca, we so often just ‘plod on’ and don’t stop to really feel how we are feeling and what’s going on within us. I’ve found Chakra-puncture a really supportive modality for giving me a marker of how still I can feel in my body and to know that it is something that is always there and that I can always reconnect back with.
I agree Fiona, being quite an anxious person, for me chakra puncture has been an amazing support it realising the tension in my body and giving me an opportunity to return to myself.
I agree Kylie – its interesting that in this world of business and caffeine and sugar and entertainment, that the one thing it is almost impossible to do is stop? That is, unless you make the conscious decision to take time out, to come of the rat race and connect back to the fact that underneath the perpetual anxiousness is a stillness that can’t be shaken.
Yes – i had direct experience of that this morning, Ray: I made a forthcoming presentation more important than my morning routine and found myself ‘rehearsing’ it until I clocked it. Then the thing was re scheduled so I had missed out on the opportunity for self appreciation by focussing on something bigger that didn’t happen. Hmmmm….definitely moment thy moment is the way to go ….and NOT anticipation by anticipation.
I do appreciate my realisation of this, though 🙂
Yes, I’m in the same boat everyone: how much to control, how much to surrender and trust; how much IS my responsibility? I do know when I do let go. it feels beautiful and very much like home. And then the control can kick in again so I have another merry go round ride until I accept the impulse to surrender again. It’s awesome that we are going through this together and supporting each other with our sharings.
” When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of.” this is so true. I have also come back to having stop moments in my day, checking in with my breath and how I feel inside and allowing the stillness to return. When there is a lot going on around us, especially if the energy is particularly of a disturbing nature taking care of ourselves in this way is vital. There can be a lot trying to pull us out and how lovely when we can stay centred and loving in all of that.
That’s an amazing revelation, Michelle, that the cause of your anxiousness was about control so that the immensity of God could be cut down to what you perceived you were able to manage and to keep yourself small. I completely relate to the ambivalence about letting go of control, letting go of planning things out and knowing in advance the outcome, because I have decided what that outcome will be. I also understand your experience around the level of your commitment to your relationship with God – yes, it can feel scary from one perspective. I love how you share that going into Stillness is what brings you to your equilibrium – that feels awesome. There is so much to consider in what you present here: thank you.
Anxiousness is something I have lived with for many years until this past 12months, when I felt the need to really look at what I was allowing in to feel that anxiety. I have realised my lack of self worth and therefore self nurturing were playing a big part in this. With more attention given to my own needs and surrendering to the tenderness within, I am feeling more of my whole self than at anytime in my life, with more to go! Thank you for a truly inspiring sharing Michelle.
Yes Roslyn Mahony, I have found anxiousness to be a response we get when we know we are not living all that we are or could be.
From one moment to the other, we can all the way to our grandness, and feel how really spaciously, humongous and all embracing it is. From one moment to the other we can also go all the way to feel us not just only human, but even a reduced version of it. Our best and worst feelings of ourselves is only one step away. Knowing the first is key for us as we learn to embrace it on seemingly unimportant aspects of our lives too. It may not be so glamorous but everything starts there anyway for us if deepening is our option.
This is beautiful and so true and relatable to thank you Michelle for the great insight and reminder of the depth of anxiousness and why in our bodies it can be. The gift we all have to stop feel and allow things to show themselves and unfold and the normality of this in the way we live is a very real and loving way to be.
This is a great opportunity for people to read and understand that yes, there are underlying tensions in my body that I was not even aware of, and these tensions and anxieties have really affected me in my day-to-day life, and then to have the opportunity to address, to recognise, to acknowledge, and then to start to heal so that we can feel what it is like to be able to feel that lovely sense of surrendered stillness.
Thank you Katerina for this reminder today that anxiousness is always a choice. Just like you share it can feel ‘familiar’ because I have lived a life long in anxiousness and I haven’t mastered it yet. I know the stillness is always waiting there for us when we choose to be with God.
I can relate so much to this as I read it, I can do the exact same patterns and I hadn’t got to the crux of how I hadn’t nailed the issue thus far. So this is a very powerful blog for me to connect with Michelle, and is perfect for me to remember to surrender to and trust in my connection with God through my stillness. This is going to be great support for me to return to, thank you.
Katerina, I love how you have highlighted the fact that we bring in the anxiousness and that this is not who we are. This makes it very clear it is actually a choice we make – to live from our stillness or to reject all that we are and identify with anxiety.
Thank you Michelle. I loved this sentence: ‘I found this a very powerful way to appreciate and accept all of who I am and, in the stillness, I am rediscovering the relationship between God and me.’ Yes, so true and so simple.
Thank you for the reminder Michelle. To take a moment to stop, feel the anxiousness and feel the reason why we are anxious is so very valuable and helps us to drop beneath it into the divine stillness that is there waiting for us.
Great blog Michelle, it took almost all day for me to read it, and I definitely started out feeling the anxiety I was holding in my body. As I have finished reading the blogs and comments, I now feel connected to a vast & steady stillness within me again. I just love the parallel that has been drawn between playing small and feeling overwhelm and the fact that we have a choice to live our big selves and then we are so very capable of living big lives. I shall re-read this blog again.
God and his Love are ever steady, every present…it’s we who wander away but if we pause and become still we will then be able to feel his loving embrace.
This is very helpful Katerina, thank you.
‘This ‘stop’ has now become part of my daily ritual, a powerful way to surrender and reconnect to the wisdom of my body’ – I love this Michelle. It’s amazing how something as simple as stopping has made such a difference to your life – this would be super supportive for so many people, as anxiousness is becoming really common. Young people especially (well from my view) seem to be running around 24/7 in total anxiousness and nervousness; they can’t stop because that requires feeling their body, which is something they don’t have an experience of doing.
So true Susie…and same goes for people of all ages! Life today is run on 24/7 anxiousness. Learning to ‘stop’ is GOLD because we are stepping outside the wheel of motion and choosing our own rhythm. Our body loves us for this.
Thank you Michelle for a light bulb moment reading your blog. I have always felt a sense of shame about being anxious and have readily denied that I am feeling it which makes it much harder to accept. I am recognising it more easily now and can really relate it to my wish to control and keep myself small. Thank you for the inspiration to re-commit to being in the stillness of my breath every day and the expansiveness that this brings.
Love it Kathryn ‘Is it God’s Plan or my Plan?’ such a simple way to expose the ways that I try to control my life and how this leads to anxiousness and overwhelm. Great reminder that the choice to re-connect us always just a breath away.
Donna what I’m coming to realise is that part of re-establishing and deepening our relationship with God is to be expressing about this relationship until it becomes natural and normal. I feel we still shy away from fully appreciating God in our lives because we’ve all been swayed by the beliefs and ideals of religion rather than the truth of God.
Alexandra, I know that after many years of studying with Universal Medicine it’s easy for me to forget the power of the very simple gentle breath meditation but it has been the key to many changes in my life. Now it’s available for all to access http://www.unimedliving.com/meditation/free/meditation-for-beginners/introductory-gentle-breath-meditation.html
That is beautiful Kathryn – I’ll remember that. I’m now referring to it as being in business with God – he’s the best business partner.
Michelle there is much to reflect on with what you’ve shared. I’ve found that I am also anxious in a number of situations and felt an underlying tension but had not truly looked at why. The point about wanting to control life and not being able to comes up strongly for me. In that if things don’t go to the plan or picture then there is a frustration or tension. With all of this I am starting to understand there is no true acceptance of myself in those situations. So with a focus on stillness, acceptance and expression I will see how that changes.
A beautiful sharing Michelle – thank you! I can totally relate to keeping myself self smaller and less than as a theme that has run my life for years – the underlying anxiousness is constant and huge until this is addressed and dealt with.
“My understanding of where the anxiousness comes from has also deepened so that I am now aware that at times life, or what is being asked of me, feels ‘too big, too much’. Trying to control life has therefore been about making it seem smaller and manageable. In truth, I have been trying to keep myself smaller and less than what I truly am – a Son of God, equal in all love and glory to him”.
I love how your share the power of stillness here Michelle and that when you make it about stillness, God and all of you, nothing is too big. This is huge!!
I am just in a situation where a lot of anxiousness is offered in my live and found that I can go on the trip with it and get myself nuts by trying to become control over things to feel save again – OR – surrender to my stillness and true being and let unfold what will unfold. Knowing me and that I will not leave me is my choice – so what ever happen maybe – at least I will have me. That is such a good feeling. I start to trust in me again. So life can come.
Yes Katarina – Anxiousness is nothing what truly belongs to me – but stillness comes from within. And I found that by open up for anxiousness (leaving my stillness), I open up a door through which a lot of other crap then can enter – thoughts of doubt, lowering and judgment, as example. And coming back to my stillness is closing this door again.
Thank you Michelle, I can very much relate to your experience and your connection with God, I have been making even more space to do the same and have realised that this can be done also while working, moving etc.. The acceptance part is the part that I have also needed to work on and will continue to work on while bring it into my daily rhythm as a normal part of my day.
Thank you, Michelle, this has explained some of what is going on for me, especially your words, ‘Trying to control life has therefore been about making it seem smaller and manageable.’ because I’ve found it easier to do less and stay small, knowing full well that I am capable of more but somehow not wanting to go there. The word ‘Surrender’ comes to mind as I write this, and ‘allow’. And it is allowing stillness to be there that makes the difference.
Very true Michelle that Serge Benhayon is an awesome role model for his connection to God and brilliant that you actually got to feel the underlying anxiousness that was driving you in your life. This is also a recent revelation for me so I can relate absolutely to the lack of trust and connection to God.
I like your saying Kathryn about ‘is it gods plan or my plan’. When it is gods plan everything just flows and when it is our plan there is always a force behind it that is not us and fraught with opportunities to go wrong.
“This ‘stop’ has now become part of my daily ritual, a powerful way to surrender and reconnect to the wisdom of my body, and the wisdom and presence of God. ” – the wisdom of God and the wisdom of our body are one and the same.
That’s it Carolien. That is all we need to know and do, and our incredible future cannot help but present itself. So simple. And yet it requires such commitment to apply this in a world which is swimming in the opposite direction. I sometimes feel like I am a salmon swimming upstream ‘against’ a current. But it is extremely worthwhile to do so.
“When I make my days about stillness, God and all of me, then nothing is too big; there is no need to go into anxiousness, doubting what I am capable of. My days are simpler, fuller, joyous, and my connection to God is felt within and reflected in everything around me.” This is huge – anxiousness and many other aliments that surround it are rife in the world today, imagine this being offered – the simple and practical tool of the gentle breath meditation( here’ s a great one – http://www.unimedliving.com/meditation/free/meditation-for-anxiety-and-stress/beating-anxiety-gentle-breath-meditation.html) That by stopping and connecting to ones breath and body it supports presence – hello presence and goodbye anxiousness. Then there would be no need for the medication, bladder problems and stories that run in our heads etc.
This is a great reminder of how the gentle breath is such an amazing tool for bringing us back to ourselves and getting to the root of what is going on which you did so superbly here. The realisation that the anxiousness was about letting go of being in control and surrendering is enormous. Thanks Michelle, a pleasure to read.
What a great clue Lieke, when overwhelm or anxiousness comes up, we could ask ourselves ‘Are we trying and believing we need to do this on our own?’
Anxiousness is a comfort.
Wow Gylrae, when I read your comment there was a momentary reaction of, I don’t want to believe that, but it is true that comfort is found in anxiousness, drama and other indulgences that we initially may not want to see.
“It never ceases to amaze me how simple it is to get a sense of clarity when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s breath.” Huge, simple and very profound – this is truth. I would even say – ‘It never ceases to amaze me how simple it is to get a sense of clarity and God when one chooses to be in the gentleness and stillness of one’s
breath”.
It is amazing Gabriele, this modality has supported me to see many unloving patterns also, and trace them back to what is truly going on. I had a similar experience where I didn’t think I was that anxious until my practitioner asked me to explain how I organise work and family, when I started talking I felt the immense tension in my body and emotion that I didn’t realise was there all came up. At the end of my session I had a clearer knowing of what needed to change and what was getting in the way of me connecting to what was needed.
I will make a commitment to read your blog every day for the next two weeks, Michelle.. 🙂 No seriously, thank you for this simple reminder and explanation where anxiousness comes from and how subtle it can run through our body. It is so easy to get lost in the everyday’s management of life.
Thank you Michelle for revealing the tension and anxiety of not living everything I am all of the time in my commitment to being a Son of God and feeling his love in and through me wherever I am.
I often over ride and try to bury the tension, I have not yet mastered using the tension as an Ali.
This was my ‘oh that’s what’s been going on!’ moment – “I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.” When I make certain things bigger than everything else I need to do, that is when I open the door and invite anxiousness and overwhelm in. It’s also something I can see I call on when there is even a small thing I don’t won’t to deal with. This is a great reminder, thank you Michelle.
Same here, Aimee. And you are spot on about making things bigger than everything else just being an open door for anxiousness to come in to distract from what we don’t want to deal with at that time.
That’s great Aimee, what sings out here is “When I make certain things bigger than everything else I need to do, that is when I open the door and invite anxiousness and overwhelm in.” Thank you, allowed me to feel how each thing we ‘do’ is all equal in the fact and sense that, we can if we choose, bring ourselves equally to each of those things to be done. So this is presence… and this is the antidote to anxiousness and overwhelm.
Beautifully said rosannabianchini and Aimee. When we regard the thing we are doing as more important than who we are, we are lost to the winds that blow us from one anxiety to the next. Everything we do is equally important by the virtue of us holding ourselves in equal presence and thus equal value in whatever situation we find ourselves. That’s the lesson to be learned in the school of planet earth and it’s something I need to remind myself of everyday, every moment.
Michelle and Aimee, I can so relate. The anxiety of letting go, of relinquishing control and surrendering! So beautiful to feel, and also scary because of the addition to control which comes from an underlying belief that things need to be a certain way, and if they’re not this way I’ll perish, so better hold on, for dear life, never let go…. oh the anxiety we hold on to not drop and let ourselves just melt within God’s love.
Thank you Michelle, I am often blown away by the insights offered by Esoteric Practitioners sometimes in a session something will come up that I had been choosing to be unaware of or hiding what then unfolds in my willingness to accept more love and healing can be a complete miracle.
Oh Michelle, what a blessing your blog brings to me. Life changing realisations. Words cannot describe my appreciation for you choosing to feel and write this down. Thank you with the deepest appreciation and love.
Chakra puncture is an amazing support, an opportunity to feel the choices made and consider more deeply the choices to make. I recall being completely unaware of how anxious I was and how long it took to diminish, it still surfaces from time to time, but it is nothing like it was when my palms were never dry and the all consuming doubt about not being enough would determine my every move. Knowing I am a spark of God, falls short if it is not lived.
When there is a sense of tension already felt in my body that hasn’t been expressed and dealt with, I tend to choose foods which then keep me in this state of racyness. When I ask what tension is? It is wanting to delay the natural movement that my body is pulled to be in the direction of. Tension is my body telling me to simply be in simplicity.
Thank you Adele – a clear and strong ‘Ah Ha’ moment from reading your comment!
” I tend to choose foods which then keep me in this state of racyness. When I ask what tension is? It is wanting to delay the natural movement that my body is pulled to be in the direction of. Tension is my body telling me to simply be in simplicity”.
Truly and deeply so—nothing is too big when I commit to being present to every small detail in life. This process is amazing and exposing to how there are so many details I have missed, and can choose now to see them clearly and take back my responsibility. When life feels big, it is an opportunity to commit to life even further—when I am with me, God is always with me. Thank you Michelle, your blog has inspired a deepened connection with me.
What a beautiful reminder you’ve me through this blog Michelle, to start looking at my level of anxiousness again. I am inspired by your two weeks program to take a moment every day day to connect to your sacredness and stillness. I can relate to what you write about your anxiety that “I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life” as I feel is key for me too. Letting go of the control about life and to allow it it to evolve from simply living life from my connection within feels the way to go. We do make ourself smaller by taking control over our lives as we do not allow to live the grand life we ought to live as the sons of God on earth.
I love the simplicity in your blog Michelle and can feel how easy it is to hold onto our current way of being instead of surrendering to what God’s purpose truly is for us.To fully accept God in my life I need to let go of control and that is scary. I am going to be more open to trusting my connection to God. Thank you.
Oh just gorgeous Joseph. I melted in someone’s arms the other day, and how could anyone ever talk about chocolate melting in their mouth in the face of such a heart-melting hug.
There’s a strong connection to self and God in this blog for me that I found wonderful; I particularly resonate with: “Trying to control life has therefore been about making it seem smaller and manageable. In truth, I have been trying to keep myself smaller and less than what I truly am – a Son of God, equal in all love and glory to him.”
I can feel my anxiousness comes up whenever I cannot control a situation. I love how you share that control is about making life small and manageable and keeping ourselves less, yet we are so so much more. Thank you Michelle.
James that’s such a clear line in the sand ‘anything less than love, is not love and so comes up to be looked at’. With that statement there is no ‘maybe’ or ‘might be’ or ‘possibly love’ because we all know love so clearly in our bodies and it either is love or it’s not. Interestingly though we have managed to fool ourselves by changing the definition of love, which has done nothing other than to really mess everything up completely because we have pretended, on masse that things are done from love when in truth there is not an ounce of love in most of what goes on currently.
Indeed Alexis truth and love in their absoluteness gives no doubt – it is only when we change their meaning or water them down however subtly that we then are left with less and we then accept this less as being good and in fact at times champion it as being better than where we were at even though it is nowhere near where we could or indeed should be.
Michelle, thankyou! I love commitment to ‘the stop’. The way you described this is very inspiring, in fact, your whole blog is inspiring.
Michelle I have just re-read your article, it really is a very profound piece of writing. It brought up in me that I have an anxiousness that is very subtle, in fact hardly there but it is. I have been aware for a while of a slight unease when I have things that I know I need to get done and then a real feeling of ease when I have done those things. It’s like I can really let myself go when I have done what I perceive I need to do but I am wondering then how much of the time do I feel slightly tense? This is now for me to look at and dismantle, as it of course gets in the way of my connection to both myself and to God.
Alexis I recently discovered another package of anxiousness I was using and it was definitely related to thinking I hadn’t done enough on different projects in my day and hence at night time when I could be building my connection to myself and God I was in anxiousness and pushing myself to do more work. I’ve now made a commitment not to work in the evenings but choose activities that are more nurturing and sometimes this does include completing tasks that need doing but I’m able to do this from an impulse not anxiousness and my evenings and sleep are really starting to change.
Great points you make here Michelle, thank you so much for sharing this.
The divine and nurturing stillness that lies beneath the raciness of every day, an everyday life that seems increasingly speedy and fraught, brings the pure and much needed medicine! Beneath the agitation, the anxiousness, the apprehension, is the divinity and stillness of God and the universe and our own precious essence that brings us all that we are crying out for, all that we have been searching for ‘out there’. Thank you Michelle for your timely reminder.
Interesting read thanks Michelle I can relate to “I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life” coming from a poverty back ground as a child I struggle to trust that everything will be taken care of financially. I have a fear of being old and not working and therefore not having money to attend the Esoteric workshops and sessions. I know if I don’t work on this issue that is what I will create so I am working on my trust issues and my connection to God and know when I do let go of control and trust everything works out and flows.
Deeply beautiful Michelle. The stillness has returned!
For us who have lived like ‘perpetual motion machines’ in constant tension and anxiety, it is like a new dawn to start learning to trust God and become still. If it were not for the example of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, I’d still be lost in the old tense way. For me it’s quite an up and down learning process, and it’s Serge’s consistency that helps me to continue developing stillness. My gratitude goes to him, and to you for sharing Michelle.
Perpetual motion machines. This was definitely me. Now, through the work with Universal Medicine, I am beginning to understand what motion is and the effects of perpetual motion on my well-being. The emotions and thoughts that are running unchecked. Tension or nervousness buzzing through me. Judgement, jealousy, self doubt. Any and everything that prevents me from surrendering totally to the absolute love of God, letting everything go, releasing all control and protection (more motion), and utterly accepting God into every crook and cranny of my body and being.
Thank you Michelle. Reading your blog this morning stopped me in my tracks, recognising the anxiousness that I am currently in and have been for a few days. It is not possible to feel God with us unless we are in our stillness and the anxiousness is another way that we keep ourselves separate. As I write this, I can feel myself drop more into my body. Yes there is still much to do but without the connection and stillness it feels like there is no point unless that quality is there.
Surrendering to God and also letting go of control and knowing that you are living in the impulse of God! Thank you Michelle a great blog to go deeper with..
Just what I needed to read today – thank you Michelle! I could relate to the anxiousness and tension of wanting to control and not wanting to fully ‘let go’ … While this is something I’ve been working on, this blog has been a great reminder to use the simple tool of connecting back to my stillness and in that, to fully allow myself to feel my connection to God.
I agree Angela – I too can relate to the subtle need to wanting to control and not always fully trusting that when I let go, what I needed to get done will happen with a natural unfoldment and without any push or force. To allow ourselves to connect to our stillness is crucial.
Thank you Michelle for sharing this inspiring insight into anxiousness and highlighting the power of Esoteric Chakra-Puncture in supporting us to re-connect to our stillness, our essence within. I can relate to what you have realised – ‘I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.’ This is so true as I realised that I do play down my connection to God, my knowing that I am a Son of God and the union I feel with God, in some areas of my daily life with others, and that this inconsistency does create tension in my body and an anxiety in me. And I am discovering how we when we do surrender to the grandness of who we truly are and all that we know within, and express this in our lives, the anxiousness is not present and instead there is a joyful knowing of how interconnected we are with all and how natural this truly feels.
It was really gorgeous to read of the connection you felt to and with God when you surrendered to what lay underneath the anxiousness you were experiencing. It is amazing how often many of us settle for skimming along the surface of connection denying ourselves the extraordinary power and beauty of what lies in the deeper layers of stillness… or the fact we can live from there.
Caroline thank you for your comment. This is very true for me in that I was unaware for many years of my own anxiousness, I also had my Universal Medicine practitioner suggest to me I might have this. In this moment as I deepened my awareness of my body I was surprised to realise I did, but it had been there so long and had become my own “norm” that I did not even realise I was experiencing it. Because I had the support to identify it I was able to get to the cause and sort it out. Now I feel a greater sense of calm and also ability to identify anxiety when it does return for a new reason.
Thank you, Michelle. This is a great reminder. Our connection to God depends on our choices at every moment. It is not an arrived at point which I can just busk in. It’s a constant conscious choice that I keep making.
‘God is a choice in every moment’ – that is gold, Fumiyo. We just need to make that choice so often that it becomes a natural every moment habit superseding the former self-destructive habits like the anxiousness cycle that keeps us disconnected from ourselves and God.
Thank you Liane, my awareness of anxiousness and overwhelm now is a signal to what I have stepped away from. From your words here, either way I fill my body with something, the only choice I have is with what.
Michelle I am deeply inspired by your blog and can relate to the hesitation to let go of control & just trust. I resonate with your words ‘I am slowly but surely learning to accept that I am a Son of God and I can reflect his love every day.’ I can feel the depth to which this is now true for you.
Michelle, how beautiful! I can really relate to the feeling of needing to be in control, but what that truly does first is control me in a sense by reducing me down to someone living in fear and doubt. It’s a real illusion that we can be in control. I really enjoyed reading about your surrender, letting yourself feel you are part of something greater and an equal in that, and from that space why would doubt even be needed when you are surrounded by and filled with the grandness we are truly from.
Very wise and simple James, anything less than love is a brilliant marker that there is something that needs to come to light.
Love this Rachel: “to surrender to God and live by God’s impulse has been the most beautiful understanding I have got from Serge Benhayon as the living example of a true Son of God on earth”. This makes me want to further explore what it really means to live by God’s impulse in my life.
I find your blog very inspiring Michelle, thank you. It’s helped me to a greater understanding on several different levels, anxiety, playing big, playing small and I will definitely be reading it again.
This is so timely for me right now Michelle. “I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.” When we don’t let go of control we halt the flow of life lived within our own stillness which separates us from God. Its when we return to our innate stillness that brings us clarity and spaciousness for a life lived with love.
That is beautiful and powerful Kelly Zarb. This choice is waiting for us all to make.
I agree, we can often make our own illusion about how we are doing and whether something is wrong or not. Through the teachings of Serge Benhayon I have learnt to look past the illusion I create and deal with it.
Great blog Michelle, I have been feeling exactly the same, how I didn’t trust my connection to God and dismissed my feelings as not being real or true … I was fighting my true feelings so that I could keep control over my life.
This sentence really stood out for me Michelle, “I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life.” so well said.
Yes to the above comments about surrendering completely to God and saying yes to trusting our connection and our purpose, I loved these words Michelle. I have felt the gentle breath to be so supportive as is chakra puncture, in bringing us back to simplicity, and allowing me to let go of control. It is the consistency now, to build this.
Yes, I echo your sentiments alisonmoir. “I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life’ this is still a challenge – to surrender and trust. When I do it is such a beautiful way to be and it is building to become my default programme.
Sweet surrender – ‘I was able to feel how I was actually anxious about surrendering completely to God, to saying yes to trusting in my connection to God and my divine purpose as a Son of God. I was anxious about letting go of being in control of the direction of my life”. – in a nutshell – yes yes yes.
Debra S thank you, this quote is very powerful. On the one hand I have control, and the other the expansiveness of surrendering to God and all that I am. Control seems quite logical when I am in it, but looking at the big picture it does not support or protect me at all. In fact, what protection is there truly in being separate from God and from all that we truly are? For me control is an enticement that comes from the idea that I am small, and in that smallness survival is the key focus and self is all that exists.
I feel that I bring in anxiety to avoid surrendering and feeling that connection to God. I use excuses and bring in worry and anxiety when there is actually nothing wrong. Reading this is a great reminder to let go – when I do it feels so simple and natural.