I was living a seemingly perfect life and was feeling normal living with my emotions and selective memories of the good times I’ve had.
I was under the impression that I had worked out what life was about and had the illusion of being in control. I couldn’t fault anything physically as everything looked picture perfect, but there was a constant feeling that something was lacking. Life felt like a tasteless strawberry made out of plastic, but it seemed no one was aware of this except me.
About four years ago I came across the books and presentations of Serge Benhayon and found them of great interest. Every time I attended a workshop or had a conversation with Serge, everything he presented was simple and made perfect sense to me.
He was talking about self-care, self-love and being with oneself. For example, I realised there is no self-love or self-care when one makes a choice to drink alcohol or to climb Mount Everest, where the fingers might freeze and may need to be amputated surgically.
If we consider ourselves the most intelligent species on this planet, why would we consider choosing such behaviours that are so harmful to our bodies? He presented simple talks that made me reflect on my own ingrained and unloving behaviours.
However, I found the most important message was that living what you have learnt is far more powerful than just knowing it.
Once you start living the knowledge, you become the living, breathing example of this truth without needing to remember any words of wisdom. For example, when I apply cream on my body gently, with love and care, the yumminess is felt in the body, and due to this simple, self-loving act, I feel nurtured as a result.
Once that feeling is registered in my body, there is no need to remember that gently applying cream is supportive. It becomes a livingness instead of just mental knowledge and words. This livingness feels like embodying the knowledge as a natural way of being.
After every encounter with Serge Benhayon, I observed and noted the changes in my awareness.
I became more and more aware of my obvious patterns and ingrained behaviours, such as the simple act of turning on the TV. In doing so, I became aware that on many occasions, I used it to distract myself rather than dealing with something inside me that needed resolution.
I also became aware that every behaviour that did not contain a feeling of centeredness or stillness had hurt, anxiety and nervousness hidden underneath it. I saw that my lack of life skills (the arrogance delivered through my mind would not agree, but this is a fact) made it difficult for me to deal with many situations in life. I observed how I often wanted to run away, or push someone away, blame others and manipulate situations.
All these things were OK in my so-called ‘normal’ life, but they were not loving. They were just ways to merely cope with life.
Today I feel that I’m living my life with more awareness than I ever had before and this is ongoing and ever deepening.
I have found that self-awareness is the key to my evolution and is what brings me true joy in life. This awareness allows me to see things as they truly are and has completely changed my perception of life.
In this constant flux of self-awareness, I ask myself:
- How did I wake up from my bed? Is my body refreshed and ready for another day or do I need to drag myself out of bed because I have to go to work or to do something that needs to be done?
- How am I walking? Am I walking with loving feet or just to get from one place to another to get the job done?
- How am I eating? Am I eating to nurture myself, or just to put the food in my body to get through the day; or do I want to distract myself by consuming certain comfort foods so I do not feel what’s really going on in a situation?
- How am I speaking? Am I present and in connection with the person I’m talking to?
The list goes on for every activity in my life, with awareness and love being at the core of every one of them.
The more I choose to be present in each moment, the more I can express from self-awareness.
My life has become an amazing journey and the fun part is that the loveliness never ends and is forever evolving.
by Haresh
Further Reading:
Self-abuse Under the Umbrella of Making it Right
A Sacred Relationship with Self – Inspired by Natalie Benhayon
Choosing Stop Moments in My Life
The Truth about Universal Medicine 
Could it be when we go into comparison we end up trying to better another and their feats and thus get lost and drift away from our innate feeling of Divinity that would knock out any form of comparison.
It seems like the majority of us live with false perceptions, a constant strive to achieve what we see on our social media channels or TV – celebrities, living the highlife at parties, beaches, skyscrapers and so on. Whilst at the same time, we all know that being a celebrity is very tough, that many of those people struggle with drugs, alcohol and sexual abuse at some level and yet we still want the recognition and many more of us are willing to pay the price just to get our name out there at any cost. Why is that? Why are we willing to risk our health just so that our life and choices can be recognised & praised by the many?
How Awesome to hear your life is an Amazing journey ✨ when we are shown another way … a true way, everything becomes so much clearer and easier.
I know we all feel this to some extent or other Haresh
“but there was a constant feeling that something was lacking. Life felt like a tasteless strawberry made out of plastic, but it seemed no one was aware of this except me.”
We know because we are all using stimulants in one form or another to just get through the day and to mask what we are truly feeling. There are times and these are becoming more frequent when people actually ask the question what is going on? Why do I feel this tension that I then try to numb out?
We have lost that inner connection to ourselves and this is causing the internal and eternal misery from which actually there is no escape until we reconnect.
Thanks Haresh, I really enjoyed the practicalities you have explored for how love looks in the world and I particularly liked the term walking with “loving feet”. “I also became aware that every behaviour that did not contain a feeling of centeredness or stillness had hurt, anxiety and nervousness hidden underneath it.” This is also very simple and practical, truly life lived with the soul is a constant exploration, an observation, then a choice to return all parts of life back to love.
It is great to hear how you were supported to become more aware in your life, ‘I have found that self-awareness is the key to my evolution and is what brings me true joy in life.’
When someone lives what they talk it stands out. So much so that it highlights how living according to mental pictures and thoughts and hearsay really doesn’t cut the mustard.
When we live with a selective memory we deliberately remember some things and dismiss others – which effectively gives us skewed version of what is true and not true.
There is no such thing as a perfect life other than the one that we are living as it is exactly what we need to grow and learn and evolve.
I love what you have said here so very wisely, Henrietta. Such a simple but very powerful truth and one when understood, will release us from the exhaustion of continually trying to have the perfect life in what is actually an imperfect world.
‘I found the most important message was that living what you have learnt is far more powerful than just knowing it.’ You can know things with your mind but when your body is not in charge you will never live what is true.
I agree with you Annelies that we rely so heavily on what our brains know rather than what our bodies know. We seem to think our brain is more powerful, when actually it is the body working in unity that can give us the answers to all the questions we could ever ask. What is being exposed is another example of the fact that yet again we are living the exact opposite to what is true.
Listening to, and honouring the body’s many messages of wisdom is such a wise decision.
Living in a world where we have been led to believe that life is all about the intelligence of the mind and the knowledge it holds, the following truth has the power to challenge that very ingrained belief. “living what you have learnt is far more powerful than just knowing it.”. And for me, that it is exactly has happened, as I come to realise that I can be classed as intelligent but that counts for nothing if I live in a way that is disregarding of myself and of others. I have learned that true intelligence comes from the body and therefore when I allow my body to be my guide in the way I live, life changes immeasurably.
There is a lot in our world that does not make sense, ‘If we consider ourselves the most intelligent species on this planet, why would we consider choosing such behaviours that are so harmful to our bodies?’
“living what you have learnt is far more powerful than just knowing it.” You can be told how to tie shoe laces but until you practice it for yourself it seems almost impossible.
I like what you say Mary Adler, I remember trying to tie my shoelaces and it was difficult at first but then after practicing for a while I got the hang of it. There is a pulse to life and when we can feel it and live from it everything changes. Living within the pulse of life takes a bit of practice but so worth it. Just like the feeling you get when as a child you really tie up your shoe laces for the first time there’s a sense of Oh! That’s how it’s done, amazing.
Self-care should form the foundations of everything we do.
So true – no matter how brilliant and inspiring the teachings might be, if they are just kept and locked up in our head or in a library and every now and then get taken out to be marveled at, it’s utterly useless. True wisdom is a livingness, and very practical.
Awareness is what brings true change, for awareness brings true understanding and with this understanding loving choices can be made.
Awareness is key in our lives, ‘I also became aware that every behaviour that did not contain a feeling of centeredness or stillness had hurt, anxiety and nervousness hidden underneath it’.
Many of us would admit that we have lived or are living a ‘normal’ life by society’s standards. But what does this normal mean and what are we really accepting as ‘normal’? I know that I had accepted anxiety, exhaustion, drive, disregarding and abusing my body and had also accepted living with minor ailments, pains and emotional hurts as just something we all have and that it’s just a part of life that we have to manage and deal with. All the while I never really felt that I knew who I was and what my purpose was in life. Yet now I know there is much more than this and through The Way of The Livingness, it has been possible to not only feel but also to live consistently a far more loving life and reality that is guided by honouring the truth and wisdom of our body and Soul. I now understand that connection is everything, and more so to be aware what it is we are in connection to: is it love or lovelessness?
“that living what you have learnt is far more powerful than just knowing it” – I have found this liberating. I used to give myself such a hard time about knowledge – do I know enough? am I smart enough? etc…but I found it much more powerful to live something that to know it. Anyone can know things – study, learn, pick up etc… – but it takes a lot more courage and responsibility to actually live it. Many can also talk it, but can we walk it?
Yes, it really is key to live what we have come to learn, or realise, rather than keep it locked away in our heads.
‘How am I walking? Am I walking with loving feet or just to get from one place to another to get the job done?’ This question on its own is enough to turn our lives around, when we start to walk connected to our body instead with being in our head, thinking about what is coming or what has been there in the past, our movements will change and we can choose to walk with purpose and joy will return in every step we take.
How are we walking, this week I got blisters on my feet, in different locations, and on different days, so what was my body showing me about how I was walking…