This morning I realised the impact that certain common sayings have had in affecting my choices throughout my life. We tend to think that a saying or proverb is used by a loved one with fondness, as an ‘endearing’ turn of phrase, but are they really supporting us?
As a young girl, one saying I can remember clearly being told to me regularly by my Gran was, “Cold hands, warm heart.” I remember her having very cold hands so it was reassuring to me that she had a warm heart.
The more disturbing fact was that I grew up having warm hands myself all the time, and lived with a little niggle at the back of my mind for many years that my heart would never be as warm as my Grandma’s.
I have to say my hands are not always so warm now, but whatever their temperature I never worry about the warmth in my heart.
I was planning to go for a walk this morning as we had the first sunny day in ages. One of my mother’s favorite sayings was, “Out you go and don’t waste your day,” which she used as she hustled us outdoors as soon as the rain stopped, and this came to mind as I looked at the sun this morning.
I could not decide where to go and was just putting on my shoes when I realised my body was needing to be still, not to walk, and despite the unusually warm morning and the lovely sun, I did not want to go outside. This morning I had gone into “Out you go, don’t waste your day” mode, (a common trap) rather than listening to my body and what it needed. So instead of walking, I chose to lie down for a gorgeous esoteric yoga session and connect to the stillness within. It would be this stillness that I would take with me later if I chose to walk.
There are so many proverbs and sayings used in our everyday language and we maybe each have our own familiar ones we grew up with or identify with, and which perhaps still return to now and again, influencing our choices if we don’t catch them.
Here are a few of the many that I have come across at times:
“When the going gets tough, the tough get going.”
Definition – Push harder when something is not working.
“If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.”
Definition – if something is working, regardless of its quality, there is no reason to change it.
“If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.”
Definition – if your way of doing something is not working, do it as others do, even if you don’t agree with their way.
“Familiarity breeds contempt.”
Definition – If you get too close to someone, you will lose respect for them.
Reading the above sayings now I can see that they:
- Deliver no truth
- Feel empty
- Encourage comparison
- Discourage unity
- Ask us not to trust our inner feelings
Could it be that most sayings actually can stunt our communication and are used when we are unwilling to go deeper with our expression?
And could sayings be having a negative impact on our lives and the choices we are making? Could they actually provide us with an excuse to remain comfortable with the status quo, fit in with others, avoid intimacy and thus give us an excuse not to shine? As we can see from the examples above, what seems at first like an innocent comment does not hold truth yet can be taken on as true.
As a student of Universal Medicine I have many times opened my Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy ‘The Sayings’ book by Serge Benhayon. The sayings in this book don’t just speak to my mind as rules to obey or regurgitate: as I read, I can feel the words in my whole body – they vibrate throughout my cells.
Sometimes this leaves me feeling expanded and light and other times I feel a tension in my body. This tension is a gift for it is telling me I am more than I am choosing to live and is pulling me up to my next level of evolution.
Each word carries equal importance and reading these sayings I am left to simply feel me – all of me. No ideals or beliefs asking me to hold back, fit in, push harder, stop shining, but words which expose evil and inspire me to be more responsible in life. There is a depth and wealth of knowledge within these words that no other book of sayings can even touch on.
This is a book of sayings that delivers Truth. It asks us to consider that we are so much more than human beings using function as the way to get through life, and that we are living a long way from our true, natural way of being.
Through these heaven-sent words we are reminded that in our essence we are all love and we can all return home to love if we choose it. It reminds us that we are held in the magnificence of God’s love always.
‘Taking energetic responsibility for all that one does and all that one says and thinks is truth in power, for one will see exactly how we can harm or heal in all that we do, say and think. That’s true power!’ (Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy “The Sayings” by Serge Benhayon, p 181)
My appreciation and love for Serge Benhayon is forever deepening. Expression is everything and the truth and love expressed through all of Serge Benhayon’s books is absolute.
By Jane Torvaney, Physiotherapist, Scotland
Further Reading:
Serge Benhayon – the Author
Books by Serge Benhayon
Rebuilding my Hard Body with Care
The Truth about Universal Medicine 
There are sayings … and sayings. Some of them justify plain unlove as the way it is. Other ones are pearls of wisdom. The problem is when we take them as a lot and do not discern which ones are which ones and we do not bother to look at how are we using them and what for.
I wholeheartedly agree with you Jane. Also that since meeting and being so deeply inspired by Serge Benhayon and his powerful ‘Purple Books’, my appreciation and love for myself has also changed beyond recognition and it is a joy to meet myself in this way.
“My appreciation and love for Serge Benhayon is forever deepening. Expression is everything and the truth and love expressed through all of Serge Benhayon’s books is absolute”.
The words we speak are a reflection of how we move.
The words we use in our everyday life are so important with everyone we speak to or even think of. It has more of an impact than we realise.
This is a powerful blog and words can play a huge role in our communication and how and the tone we say thing in can either have a restricting or evolutionary effect.
Without perfection I’m becoming more and more astute to this.
A saying can be so damaging especially when it echoes in our heads. I can recall when I was an avid fan of going to the gym continually hearing “no pain, no gain” so I trained my body with this echoing in my head and paid the consequences afterwards.
I’m re-learning to exercise in the gym, taking things gentle and stopping a movement if my body doesn’t feel like doing. Or even stopping half way and I’ve only done half the reps if the body says its had enough. There are no set rules when I am at the gym any more and I love going there and it is so supportive after having a 10 year break.
I have come to understand, that as everything is energy, words are little packets of energy too, and put together in one of these sayings they become very powerful constellations that can hook us into believing that what they say is true. One I particularly feel this hooking in, is the saying ‘everything in moderation’, a well-used to excuse to eat or drink something that the speaker knows is possibly harming for them, or for us the person they are saying it to. Perhaps if we stopped to discern how these sayings really feel in our body when we speak them we may get to feel that there is not one ounce of truth being offered to us.
“It reminds us that we are held in the magnificence of God’s love always.” The sayings of Serge Benhayon hold truth in every word.
When I get one of these sayings you mentioned first as a reply I often feel powerless as they seem to cut you down and make you look silly for what you were feeling. Yet all in all the feeling is true and those sayings are just there to control and protect the hurt people are feeling of not listening to their own feelings. When you are solid in yourself they are easily exposed.
Wow how retarding are these sayings – it really demonstrates how powerful words are – they can either elevate us or reduce us to be so much smaller than we’re designed to be. And …. just common sense – surely warm hands would mean a warm heart.
It is so important to feel and discern the energy of the words and sayings that that pop out of our mouth, almost by rote. We are confirming everything we say in our body.
When we call them ‘sayings’ they sound so innocuous when in truth they are curses that can cap our evolution for lifetimes.
Great nominations Jane and exposure of how much we can be reduced by careless words. We all have responsibility for how we choose to express and I find that I am feeling much less pressure to fill space with meaningless or harmful words but can slip back into it if I am not careful as it has been such an engrained habit.
A lot of the sayings that circulate in our society, as you have shared, do not represent the truth of who we are or call us to embrace more of who we are, and in fact work to keep us in comfort and capped from exploring our true potential. They are much like a curse that we keep alive amongst us, which we substitute for expressing the truth we feel, which essentially keeps us from evolving. It is our responsibility to discern what quality it is that is being shared through the words or sayings we allow in our society – do they empower or seek to dis-empower?
Yes Brendan, I also used that saying a lot whilst I exercised or contorted my body into an unnatural yoga posture, that saying made me push myself more and not listen to my body, no wonder I used to get sick quite often.
Spot on Jane, these sayings can be considered quite normal and innocent in society, but I find some can be quite harming and actually block me from truly expressing or connecting with another.
Oh My Gosh … what a plethora of sayings there are in our culture to reinforce dysfunctional behaviour… definitely time for some new bumper stickers…suggestions?? ☺
Cold hands can never be a sign for a warm heart. What this reveals is (a) how much we accept as part of what it is the part that is not it and (b) the extent to which we are ‘helped’ to naturalize that by our language.
Jane this is so important as how many of us are brought up with sayings that subconsciously or consciously are energetically debilitating in some way yet we accept them as normal or do not even question them. The definitions you have given of just a few sayings clearly exposes this as you are so on point with what you have shared. And I completely agree when you open and read any of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicines books, particularly the Esoteric and Exoteric and Philosophy ‘The Sayings’ book as well as the ‘Esoteric Teachings and Revelations’ the truth of what is expressed here is clearly felt in the body and yet in unimposing on the reader giving instead the opportunity to ponder on what has been presented and hence giving the opportunity to expand and truly evolve from within .. completely different to the sayings we are brought up with.
I can relate to so many of those sayings Jane. “Could it be that most sayings actually can stunt our communication and are used when we are unwilling to go deeper with our expression?” A great point – these sayings are used as token expressions. Keeping everything superficial is the name of the game here – which also keeps us in protection and separation away from other people.
Thank you Jane for sharing, it is true in my experience these saying are there to cap us to keep us with the status quo, to keep us small to fit in and not live the love we are. The total opposite to that are the saying by Serge, that call us to come up to who we truly are, step into our power and divine love as the true sons of God that we are all equally and shine this love out to others that they too may arise.
We have misused words so much, that it is more foreign for us to actually question what they mean, than it is to just say them because they are familiar. I love that you are questioning the status quo and bringing it to everyone’s attention how off some of the things we say actually are.
So true Sarah. It also feels like sayings are a lazy excuse to not express what we really feel, as they are already there in circulation, familiar as you say, and a safe way to say something that fits in.
“What’s in a Saying?” – very often the complete opposite of the truth.
It really shows the need to discern everything, sometimes I find that some of the old sayings do hold a seed of truth and other times they are the opposite of truth – what I find is important with whatever is communicated to us is that we feel whether it is a truth for us or not.
There is so much information in the way we use words. Not only the information that the words mean by themselves, but also the energetic imprint behind them. When we allow ourselves to feel the whole meaning of a sentence, as well as its intent, we can feel the imposition or the expansion that comes with it, and then we are free to let them in, affecting our lives or not.
What we say to ourselves can indeed feed the status quo of comfort or, inspire us to be and feel more.
Our language shapes us and the sayings we have been surrounded by from early childhood can certainly feel like prison walls, trying to get us to conform and not rock the boat. How about “the early bird catches the worm?” Are we being told here to go out, no matter how we are feeling; to not check in with the body in the pursuit of some gain?
Just how much are we conditioned to not hold our quality from within. Words, sayings, behaviors, ideals of how life is ‘supposed’ to be and beliefs. If we truly contemplate how much of our life this influences, and noisily wipes out our choice to choose our quality before we move, we would be astounded by the influence that they have over us.
Amazing how the ideals and beliefs so insidiously weave themselves into the way things are as society and as an individual through those sayings. When we start dissecting life, allowing the simplicity and the wisdom of our body to come to the foreground, it is not that hard to see how everything is energy. Even a simple word or a saying is imbued with an energy of a kind. And we can feel it as a curse or a blessing.
I’d never really given much thought to the sayings that float around in our society. Similar to the ones listed within the article there are many more that pop in at different times and it’s almost like a way of explaining something that is going on but not explaining it to any depth. Perhaps that’s why we call them ‘throw away lines’ because they don’t allow you to see things at any real depth but more give a relief that they have a place, even though you may not understand them. I remember this feeling now, when I have used a saying to explain something and been left with a bemused look on my face but shrugged my shoulders and moved on. If something has come up in a way that needs us to look at it then to throw it away only confirms it’s return at some point. These saying seem like that detract from you feeling more into things and allowing more understanding to come to you and then allow the same thing almost to return to you again and again. I’ll be more aware of when one of these sayings just pops into my mind to dismiss something that is going on.
Thank you Jane for exposing the harm that comes from these sayings and many sayings that currently exist and have carried through in our society. It is so true that mostly they are capping and hobbling our true potential, sanctioning us to dismiss all that we are and are here to live. This certainly calls on embracing our responsibility, to be aware of and discern the quality of energy that is being delivered when sayings are used, do they call us to be all that we truly are or excuse us and justify why we are choosing to be less.
Living how we should instead of living from how we feel is indeed a common trap that I can fall into. We allow ourselves to be governed by ideals and beliefs. As I let go of these ideals and beliefs I get to feel more and therefore make choices that support my body. It is truly allowing myself to feel as to what is being said whether that is a saying, or not, to determine whether it is true or not.
Your appreciation for truth and the sayings brought through by Serge Benhayon is absolutely gorgeous Jane. True sayings are worth appreciating too because they support us to heal.
True sayings that come from truth support evolution and deepening; they can shake us up or confirm us, they always deliver.
I agree with all you share here Jane the truth and love expressed through Serge’s books is absolute and offers the reader an opportunity to reflect and to embrace the truth and how this supports us to express more of who we truly are.
With awareness our responsibility grows for we are faced with the facts of how the choices we make day by day affect, not just our life, but the lives of others as well.
When I read the sayings you have highlighted Jane I could feel the constriction and control but when I read the sayings in the book by Serge Benhayon Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy ‘The Sayings’ I feel the expansion and invitation to be more of who I am.
Contemplating on what you have shared here Jane, I can see that all these sayings have over time become normal to us, accepted as the truth, never questioned and often fiercely guarded if someone dares to challenge their veracity. Maybe if we all stopped and really felt in to these sayings we may start to question if they are actually true and why have been believing and acting on them for so long.
Jane, you bring up such an interesting topic. So often these expressions/phrases are said off the cuff or to fill a gap. It’s not true expression, but a borrowed phrase that doesn’t hold truth. I really enjoyed reading this and will certainly think twice when I hear or consider one of these phrases.
ha ha Nick I wonder if the thinking twice is in itself a saying – think about it (pun intended) and where is the second thought coming from the same source as the first so is it really a second thought?
I am in total agreement Jane that we are: “so much more than human beings using function as the way to get through life, and that we are living a long way from our true, natural way of being”. Could it be that this is because we have been programmed through the many beliefs handed on down to us, which include so many of these life stifling sayings, to believe that we are not the amazing human beings that we naturally are? Letting go of these destructive beliefs and no longer giving one ounce of credence to these sayings would be a great place to begin to re-claim our amazingness.
Great article Jane, I can so relate to sayings that were around in my day and the effect they have had and still do at times on my life. They were used to cap my joy, keep me confined to a set of beliefs to fit into societies standards, so very controlling. I love the book by Serge Benhayon “The Sayings” these are true sayings calling us to live the love we are, delivering truth in every word for our evolution.
Well said Jane, these sayings are not so innocent and I agree they stop us from truly communicating and building connection with others.
It’s actually pretty intense when you think about it. We have actually lived according to some of these strings of words. How crazy is that? My favourite one has always been ‘ what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’. It was about 7 years ago now where I had an epiphany about that saying. I realised that actually – it was more like ‘ what doesn’t kill you makes you harder’. I had always lived in a way that I would push myself to be better, to always take the most difficult route, to prepare myself for life, made sure I built up enough thick skin to get through. What a fat load of no good that did for me!
I agree that is a very insidious saying and one that appeals to our addiction to identification aka the spirit which is described here: http://www.unimedliving.com/unimedpedia/word-index/unimedpedia-spirit.html
Yes it is easy to say something, and if you keep saying it, you and other people will start believing it and eventually it will become “true” because everybody is saying it. It is so easy to repeat and believe something that you have heard on the internet.
So many of our beliefs start like this.
When Serge Benhayon presented that you can feel the truth of something, that made more sense to me.
It has taken me awhile to feel the truth of this because I had lost confidence in myself that I do know when something is right.
Now I will listen to anyone but am feeling more of what is really going, so I can make a better choice as to whether it is “true” or not.
wow..those common sayings are insidious – and taught to us from young to doubt ourselves and what we innately know.
Great observation Jane, as you say we can use sayings and allow them to influence our choices. I always wonder what someone really wants to express when they use a saying to capture the moment because there is so much more to be expressed and a far more loving way to express it too.
As I read this today I thought about how I can make off the cuff remarks. Today, I am going to pay attention to all I express to be aware that it is the truth that I know and feel.
Well exposed Jane, thank-you. The ease with which such sayings as you’ve described exist and creep into our everyday language is actually shocking, if we are willing to see. We are cursed by them, diminished from the actual truth which would never hold us in such a light. Our ability to discern and then discern yet more, is paramount.
How powerful then, to hear and read words of absolute truth, that hold us as unequivocally equal and call us to all that we innately are, rather than diminish us into lives and expressions that are a far cry from the greatness of our true natures. Hear, hear, that Serge Benhayon’s books deliver all of this and more, in every single word…
Words are so powerful. We can feel the toxicity in them when spoken with ill-intent. The examples you have shared here really expose how being old and repeated many times doesn’t make it a truth – although, like the word ‘religion’ some things might have lost their original meaning and somehow got twisted and the person who said it first could be kicking themselves in their grave.
The sayings you use as an example, and in Dutch we have similar sayings, they are always asking us to compromise what we feel, they ask us to not feel and to just go as in ‘don’t be childish’. The sayings Serge has written down for us, is what he lives and are always felt in our body if we choose to feel and knowledge what truth is.
These sayings provide a bedrock for how we can live… not immediately recognised for the damage they do, they provide anecdotes of how to get around common problems – literally successful coping strategies. But they are not the truth, and they fall far short of providing a guide that is loving and honouring, keeping us in a pattern of behaviour that has not been working for centuries.
I also love this book – ‘Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy’, ‘The Sayings’ book by Serge Benhayon. There is space, depth and truth to the words, which beautifully confirm the truth we are.
We hold so much responsibility in the spoken word – even though it seems what we say is not recorded on paper so we may be able to get away with flippant remarks (like these comfortable sayings) it’s all still energy and we all feel it.
I love reading this post Jane, because each time it reminds me of something else I have been caught up in the false belief of. There are more sayings, phrases that we live by than we know, or at least there are for me. I often don’t even realise, as they have formed belief systems that have stuck and become a norm, despite them not really serving any true purpose other than to have me repeat a certain way of doing things over and over again without question.
Can you feel what it would be like to live everyday with ‘The Sayings’ by Serge Benhayon as well known and repeated everyday by people just like the old proverbs – how lovingly reinforced would our world be? I loved how you have exposed the simple throw away one liners that have been accepted and used in our lives and still are Jane, and as I observe that we are on different sides of the world geographically magnifies how global these one liners are. True Responsibility is checking in on every thought, word and action, and by doing this the essence of each of us too will begin to shine. Thanks Jane.
Jane thank you for raising this issue. I know the ‘cold hands warm heart’ saying well as I always had cold hands as a child, so it was said to reassure me. It never occurred to me that it would have a negative effect on a person with warm hands, and have used the saying as an adult. It is a great lesson about being discerning of everything we speak, and not be lulled by familiar common sayings.
It is incredible to see what we are asked to do by the sayings that are a commonplace. Asking us to be less, while there is a deep truth being able to expressed, as the presentations by Serge Benhayon show us.
Many of the well used and entrenched sayings that are used as everyday wisdom , don’t necessarily hold truth but more a going along with type vibe or attitude. Although they can be funny and be things that can be related to, they don’t always give us a different reflection or another choice if we choose to go along with them or treat them as gospel, so to speak .
What I feel really strongly reading your piece Jane is how much we restrict ourselves and can live according to cliches, and it’s not the truth of how we are or even vaguely close to how we can live. Truth expands us, it confirms us and as you note any tension we feel in it’s presence is a call to us to live it more deeply. There is nothing static about it, it’s absolute but forever offering us the reminder to be the truth we are and express it always.
A great question to be asking Jane ‘And could sayings be having a negative impact on our lives and the choices we are making?’ Well I recall using a saying to avoid all responsibility and give me an excuse to indulge and be reckless ‘when in Rome’, basically meaning when you are visiting another country or city behave like the people that live there. These types of sayings can definitely lead you to choices that have negative consequences all round.
I love that this asks us to contemplate the harm in sayings that we have heard and regurgitated as normal without considering what they are really saying and the effect this can have on our choices if we blindly swallow the meaning as if a truth. It is beautiful to have a book of Serge’s sayings that do nothing but inspire you to be all you are and more, with no hidden agenda or message to make us less in any form. This is the beauty of a saying based on wisdom.
I have been working with some friends on an article about appreciating ourselves. Some of the sayings that seem to a go against this are – ‘don’t get ideas above your station’, and ‘you are getting too big for your boots’. We came up with many more which are about keeping us small or in our place.
I feel we use sayings because we are unsure of how to cope/deal with life and we don’t want to stand there looking like we don’t know so we use these things to look as if we got it all together. The destructive thing about this is that children who often look up to adults thinking that they got it all sorted can get very confused with this dishonest approach.
“Could it be that most sayings actually can stunt our communication and are used when we are unwilling to go deeper with our expression?” – is this then no different to swearing? yes swearing is on the extreme side, we can feel it is obviously cutting off communicating how we feel but equally so if not worse are these sayings. It also brings up the question of our awareness towards questioning these phrases and where they stem from and the quality they are delivered in such as “bless you” when someone sneezes – what is the purpose of maintaining such wording and sayings and if we truly felt into what is being maintained what then? This could also be related to body language and maintaining certain stances or postures – what is the quality that we are circulating and how does it feel to repeat that quality over and over again?
When I read both the sayings commonly used and the saying by Serge Benhayon the difference I notice us the first ones are incomplete they feel like a trow-away line when people do not really know what to say. The ones from Serge Benhayon’s books feels complete, it gives a whole package which we can do with what we want, and learn from as we go.
Every word we speak has the potential to either heal or harm, there is no middle ground. This simple truth is too confronting for many as it helps us to see in no uncertain terms that we have a great responsibility here on Earth to live our love with every breath.
Here’s another seemingly harmless saying and its true (and harmful) meaning, to add to the list:
‘When in Rome, do as the Roman’s do’ – follow the flock even if it does not feel true. If everyone else is doing it, ‘fitting in’ matters more than standing true.
What are words? We can see them on a screen as waves; they are energy the same as radio, TV and phone signals. But words can be like microwaves in our ovens! A microwave oven is a very simple process; it emits a signal that makes just water molecules vibrate fast, and this creates heat. Are there words that trigger things we have buried within us? Then there are the words in Serge Benhayon’s books that just feel right and powerful without any force all at the same time.
Hello Jane and the “cold hands warm heart” made me smile. I remember this and many other sayings that sit in our world at times unquestioned or not truly understood by what is meant by them. I would use these whenever I was faced with something I didn’t have an answer for or didn’t truly understand. A saying to make myself and others feel better at times. I don’t just use a saying now or repeat it without first seeing what I am saying, no more throw away lines. Everything moment is important as is every word and saying.
It is exposing the way we have been controlled by old sayings and never stopped to feel the truth and the damage done on our bodies. Through Universal Medicine, I have learned how energy works and this has allowed me the ability to discern what is truth and feel it in my body as the confirmation of the love within me.
Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy ‘The Sayings’ book is one of my favorite purple books written by Serge Benhayon. It is a book that I can pick up, go to any page and read a saying that I know will deliver the absolute truth which will support me in that moment. It is a book full of wisdom.
Excellent points you raise Jane as these saying that we bandy around so carelessly are not at all funny or innocent. Most of them are evil in the true meaning of the word. As Serge Benhayon shares in his book The Way of Initiation, p689: ““Evil is – anything that keeps one away from their inner-heart and thus from their soul.” and that is exactly what these kind of sayings insidiously do.
Jane, I love coming back to this blog as you’ve completely de-railed the consciousness/ideals that surround the sayings and mantras we use in life to excuse our choices and those that are creating a very widespread false belief in our society e.g. ‘if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em’.
One that I have heard a lot lately is ’it has always been done that way’ is at times like Simon and Goliath taking on the conciseness of it. All of these sayings are just shortcuts to disconnect us from communication with others. The ‘The Sayings’ book is amazing with the magic that it contains; not the magic of illusion or misdirection but that of the power in truth and how we can live our life in harmony.
I completely agree Jane, the kind of sayings you are referring to are almost all completely poisonous and very harmful. Many of them are so programmed into us that we say them or act on them like machines without even considering the effect they are having on us. I am often stopped in my tracks when I hear such expressions and realise the implications of them. It is the same with many of the billboards that I often see outside churches. The worst thing is that some have what appears to be a small amount of truth in them, but it is often twisted and serves to separate us from ourselves. What you are describing here is the evil as defined by Unimedpedia at: http://www.unimedliving.com/unimedpedia/word-index/unimedpedia-evil.html
And what you are writing about here goes even deeper as so many of us have taken on and developed our own little sayings that disempower us, and these become verbal habits through which we can successfully sabotaged any evolution that we dare to take upon ourselves.
Great post, Jane. Sayings prevent us from communicating deeper and as you say they offer no truth. I shall be much more aware when sayings next pop into my head and feel deeper into their purpose at that time.
Great blog Jane. It’s funny how often we think things and we don’t even realise what we are saying or what meaning it really has. Cold hands warm heart is something I have said a lot and I am sure there are many others too.The next time I go to resite a saying I will definitely stop and consider what it means.
This is brilliant Jane and certainly given me the prompt to observe any sayings I may still be using in my day, where do I use them and why?! Thank you
Yes Nicole awesome comment. It reminds me to be super aware, respectful and conscious of the words I use and my intentions when I express. It is a responsibility we can choose to not harm ourselves or anyone when we express.
Could it be that sayings fit into three categories; they justify our reasons not to commit, state the obvious or expand us and we chose the path to travel down.
I love your simplicity Steve! Absolutely agree that many of these statements justify our reasons to not commit, I would add some are specifically designed to keep a person small and down.
Jane your blog has elicited so much pondering and subsequent discussion. I sat with a saying that has been in my head for a while ‘the only person that you’re cheating is yourself’. After some reflection I came to the conclusion that this is not true at all because when we cheat ourselves we are actually cheating everyone else as well because in truth we are all One and the same.
Adam, you are so right when you say ‘it is up to us to discern the difference between a blessing and a curse’. I feel that we have stopped consciously discerning the energetic quality of all things. It feels like we have pulled our antennae in and fallen into a deep sleep! But now some of us are rubbing the sleep out of our eyes, as we very, very slowly start to wake up to the truth of all things.
A saying is not wise just because it is clever, or by the mere fact that it is a saying. Nor does popularity make it so. And so a saying can either be a blessing or a curse, and it is up to us to discern the difference.
That is so true Adam I totally agree. It is our responsibility to discern the truth of what we express and receive.
Such an interesting Blog and how many times do we actually stop and look at the way we are expressing things. We are constantly in expression in all that we do as we do not just stand there like a statue cold and lifeless – so it makes complete and utter sense to be expressing ourselves in full in all that we do. To have ‘sayings’ that we adopt is a lazy way of expressing how we truly feel and disguise our true feelings with them.
“And could sayings be having a negative impact on our lives and the choices we are making? Could they actually provide us with an excuse to remain comfortable with the status quo, fit in with others, avoid intimacy and thus give us an excuse not to shine?”
Very poignant and challenging questions; my feeling is we do certainly use sayings to do all that you say Jane and also to hide or avoid the truth.
“If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em.” Reading these saying I realized they want us to not rock the boat but fit in even when we feel it is not right.
Yeh that has to be one of the worst sayings that incarcerates the human race to never progress forwards. A true life does not ‘beat’ anyone OR ‘join’ anyone because it can’t beat them!
I have used this saying many times before. It reminds me of feelings of giving up on what I know and feel is true.
After reading this blog i am very glad that i hardly quoted sayings knowing now of the effect they can have- as long as we are not aware.
“And could sayings be having a negative impact on our lives and the choices we are making? Could they actually provide us with an excuse to remain comfortable with the status quo, fit in with others, avoid intimacy and thus give us an excuse not to shine? As we can see from the examples above, what seems at first like an innocent comment does not hold truth yet can be taken on as true”. Thank you for wiring this blog Jane and what impact sayings have on us, I was not aware of that.
I love reading this blog, it brings it back to the simplicity of life and what we feel. Because the sayings that are so often used completely override what we feel, while true sayings from Serge Benhayon are showing us that we are so much more when we feel and not let our mind take over.
Absolutely Brendan and it blocks any true communication with another.
Oft-repeated phrases are substitutes for communicating what is really there to be felt and said. They are a comfortable, default mechanism lacking detail, precision and, ultimately, truth.
I recall a similar line Jane re getting me outdoors but in my case it was not to shoo me out of the house after a prolonged period of rain but to ‘get me moving’ as it was thought I was too bookish, overweight and lazy. Sadly, I came to believe it as much as resent it. We really need to exercise great care in terms of what we tell our children.
My feeling is these accepted sayings are a curse, designed to enter our everyday language as so much programming.
Many sayings have a bit of a truth but don´t deliver the full truth instead, they are examples of coping with a life that lacks truth.
We can use sayings as we can use humour to handle situations that actually reveal to us a tension that makes us aware of something not being right, may it be a lack of love or truth, the avoidance of intimacy, not wanting to face something etc, basically it is a form of giving up, a pragmatic way to settle for less than we know to be true.
What I have noticed is that people can use sayings to cover for them instead of really communicating. They can use them, like saying “cold hands, warm heart”, to dismiss any more conversation on this topic. It’s like saying, this is the final word and I do not want to discuss my lack of good blood circulation or face up to it – for instance. I have a relative who constantly talks in platitudes. What I have realised is that they do this because they have been deeply hurt and this keeps everyone from getting close or knowing them. Sayings, used like this, stop everyone from expressing, the person using them and the person they’re talking to, as the saying is used as the last word and shuts down discussion. The saying appears to hold the weight of time, wisdom and general consensus, but it should never really be given this kind of power.
In the past I often had very cold hands so many people would say to me ‘cold hands warm heart’ and eventually I would say this first to others, it seemed like I was apologising for who I was. The interesting thing is when we blindly say these things we can miss the opportunity to truly grow and learn something.
We can constantly choose to evolve and the meaning of our words supports this evolution. If using words that others have boxed into a meaning for whatever reason we would be digging up the past, recycling or simply feeling a little lazy to take a moment to feel what is specific to the now and offering the true foundation for what is next. I know where I’d rather choose to be.
I remember I used to hear this comment a lot as I grew up – ““Familiarity breeds contempt.” It really was there to discourage people from getting to know each other too much. This saying denies the fact that we come from love and are in essence love and that the more we get to know someone the more we actually see their divine nature.
What a fabulous line “This tension is a gift for it is telling me I am more than I am choosing to live and is pulling me up to my next level of evolution.” Thankyou for explaining tension this way!
Rereading your blog this morning the saying that comes to mind is ‘many hands make light work.’ I like this one and its something I am embracing more. Asking for help is such a supportive thing to do and trying to do everything on my own definitely didn’t work for me.
Unless it was a ‘How many hands does it take to make a light work?’ kind of a joke! Seriously though, you are pointing out here that perhaps there are sayings that are more truism than cliche. It’s possible. We need to discern which is which.
A lot of these sayings that you have listed here feel like a way for humanity to pull together in a comforting way that says ‘life is tough and it’s beating us, so let’s just accept it and stay small and do our best’. There is a giving up nature to it. What I have experienced with Universal Medicine is that we can choose to pull together in a way that is supportive and celebratory of the grandness that we actually are, and that we can choose not to be small or to give up or accept that life is a certain way. Sayings can keep us captive to a way of viewing life that does not serve anyone.
I agree Rebecca. I once worked with a young, very given-up woman whose primary mode of expression was the cliche. I suspected she was parroting words gleaned from her parents (probably via their parents) and this proved to be the case. Life’s die was cast, complete with cliches to prove it was all rolling out as woefully as anticipated.
This is a great example of how we create our own reality through the way that we think and the words that we speak. They create our belief systems which we then live.
When we express heaven-sent words, as you also do in this blog, Jane, we become heaven-sent messengers.
Beautifully said Felix and so very true.
It’s amazing how sayings are used to control and manipulate others’ behaviour – particularly the children, or whoever that is new to an environment/condition we ourselves might be more familiar with.
I remember studying sayings at about age 9. One that really confused me was “Every cloud has a silver lining” because at that age silver meant something valuable, so I wasn’t sure whether it meant something good or that a cloud could be ominous (an ominous cumulus!) because of its potential to rain – but rain could be good too! Ultimately truth is something we need to feel within and a saying is a static piece of information without much depth.
Yes and why stay static when we can have such fun with language? Ominous cumulus – I love it! Language can be so playful and alive. Sayings of the trotted out cliche variety feel dead and dull, the verbal equivalent of gluten.
These phrases/sayings that have been around for a long time have all been taken as a pinch of salt and harmless. But as you so rightly say Jane they do much more than bastardised a situation. These phrase/saying absolutely are feed by struggle, hardship, disconnection of who we are and what we feel to do at any given point. The other thing I find interesting is the so called playful, cryptic expression these phrases/sayings are. This form of expression is not true expression at all and they are used because we haven’t been encouraged to express how we truly feel. The Sayings by Serge Benhayon is the polar opposite and express’s all that we are in Full. I know which one I prefer and am deeply thankful Serge has honoured the impulse that expresses such wisdom.
Wedding vows can be so beautiful when they are written from the two people getting married and are simple statements of how they feel about one another, and their commitment to each other, and to evolution.
The Sayings by Serge Benhayon are truly a blessing for humanity and I love how you captured the different impact a saying can have on us, Jane, either capping us or empowering us.
Everything is designed in either a quality to expand us or to keep us contracted.
Thank you Jane your blog gave me an opportunity to become of aware of some old sayings that I can repeat at times that were constantly fed to me when I was a child. These sayings are quite harming and are often said to control and manipulate a situation and make another feel less. To truly communicate with another we need to more responsible with the words we use and the energy we say them in.
I agree, Brendan. If we find ourselves in the position where we have to justify what we just said with words which are attempting to diminish the pain they have caused, we have misunderstood the power of our words and our own ability to hurt another simply through our lack of awareness.
There is a responsibility in every word used. Are we aware of our intention when we open our mouths and speak?
Slowly I am realising this, as I have been rather irresponsible with how I spoke before I became a student of Universal Medicine.
I couldn’t have written it better about the Sayings from Serge Benhayon:” This is a book of sayings that delivers Truth. It asks us to consider that we are so much more than human beings using function as the way to get through life, and that we are living a long way from our true, natural way of being.”
Great subject to explore, the power of words and phrases and sayings and how even the most “innocent” sayings can affect us over our lives. One that struck me was ‘ Eat your crusts and your hair will go curly’
My hair was very curly growing up, so I thought if I didn’t eat them my hair would go straight.
That is such a cute example! The one I heard often was: ‘an apple a day, keeps the doctor away’, which didn’t make sense as people who ate apples got sick also.
thats funny and true!!
The one that came to me today: ‘no joy, without hard work’ has influenced me for such a long time. Like we always have to work hard and can’t simply have fun and let it all flow.
Another one is “roll with the punches”I managed to glorify being pushed around by my circumstance partly because of this common saying.
Very cute sarahraynebaldwin 🙂 I knew from a young age this saying was rubbish as I had super straight hair and no amount of crust eating made it curl. It is a great example of the ridiculous sayings that keep people locked into behaviours that don’t serve them.
Yeah absolutely! These sayings are considered cute and innocent but they can actually powerfully affect our whole lives, and when said in childhood can still be resonating many many years later. It seems like a very subtle, insidious and accepted form of manipulation to me!
Words are powerful and need to be used with full responsibility in order to not harm another, there is not enough taught on this in school.
I agree – if true language and expression was taught in schools we would live in a a much more decent and respectful society.
When you think about it, life is a school and we all learn from each other constantly, for me its about having these great conversations with people in the world, about what is really behind a saying, or what we feel the true meaning of a word is. These types of discussions could be what brings about more understanding on a border scale.
Ha ha Sarah, I love it, I remember that one too from my childhood and could not figure out why the rest of my family had curly hair and mine was straight. It just didn’t make sense when we all ate our crusts.
I am sure these sayings all had a meaning way back when but you cant help but think that most of them are out dated.
I wonder too where they originate from. Here is one I just read which speaks volumes about the harmful games at play ‘People put walls up, not to keep people out, but to see who loves them enough to break them!’ Zero love here and zero responsibility.
Yes way off the mark there! This one use to get me back in the day, I used it to justify how rough I was in my movement.
“Go hard or Go home”. It was also popular in my parting days, as if to say, if you didn’t want to get super trashed, just leave, as thats what we are doing tonight.
Horrible saying but at the time it was almost like it egged me on in my ill choices. On the other hand Serge Benhayons sayings have the power to bring you back and confirm you when you are spot on in a choice.
I’ve been looking at a blog about the energy of emotions earlier, and there is a saying there how to ‘observe and not absorb’ emotions from others. It can be felt how true this saying is, because it resonates deeply and makes a change to how we live our lives, a great saying to take notice of.
I once heard a very wise man say that the greatest weapons on earth are words. If you want to control and subjugate people forget nuclear bombs, control, manipulate and reinterpret language and you have absolute control over people.
There is much manipulation and control that can be spread through words, especially when we are not discerning what is really being said.
This is a huge revelation in this blog. That our language actually can directly influence the way we think and therefore the way we move! It’s amazing to think that if we hear a saying often enough and adopt it as a truth then it is very possible that we then run our whole lives based on this saying. The power of language.
This is significant for sure Andrew and makes me consider the impact aggressive swear words have on our body and posture.
Yes Abby, I too have come to understand the power of words and the impact of all those unexpressed emotions we hold onto when we swear and the true impact on our bodies and the way we move, it is huge what we take on and the way it restricts our body away from the true nature of who we are.
I grew up in Australia and sayings and slang and turns of phrase were so common that you can almost have a whole conversation using these sayings as if it was another whole language! I used to think they were endearing cultural traits but in more recent times I have started to feel that many of these sayings actually are lazy forms of expression and subtle forms of protection and guardedness that allow people to avoid fully expressing what they really feel. They are a form of shield to keep others from getting too close.
That is a very interesting point, andrewmooney26. I hadn’t thought about it like that, but yes definitely I can see how we use the sayings and proverbs to hide our feelings and use them as protection – ‘lazy forms of expression’ indeed – while making us sound as though we know something and we are offering something of value when in fact we do not even go there to know what it is we truly want to say.
I agree there are many sayings or words or phrases in our language that encourage separation and disharmony rather than unity and love. They are like well worn familiar behaviours that we keep repeating believing they must be ok because they have been around a while without fully checking the energetic quality of them.
True Andrew – they are like well worn familiar behaviours and have similar outcomes, they bring comfort and avoid responsibility.
Beautiful Elizabeth. There is such evil coming through this expression for it is saying ‘do,do,do’ rather than simply ‘be’ How gorgeous that you have thrown it out and claimed your stillness and thus your ‘beingness’.
Wow – I had not fully contemplated the insidiousness of these sayings. We often use them so flippantly but this blog has really made me consider how important language is, how important it is to speak the truth and how using a flippant saying could actually harm another or leave a doubt in them that lasts for years.
I remember one of the mantra’s at my school was ‘no pain, no gain’. What a curse! Basically to go through life with the configuration that if I’m not pushing myself to the furthest point of pain, then there will be no success. Pleased to say that this is not the only way I’ve found to live, but interestingly its still something I can slip back into when I overdo it.
Agree Simon. This one is awful and I still hear it often. I did used to subscribe to it, especially when it came to exercise. It resulted in quite a few injuries. I’m off to the gym now, but I’m glad to say that it’s no longer my motto. I’m more ‘gently does it,’ these days.
Its not just in exercise that this plays out… we are encouraged to push the bounds in all aspects, that more is better, and without the right balance the intensity of long working hours in an effort to keep pushing is equally damaging.
I loved this blog. It is so true.
Serge Benhayon’s book of teachings and revelations continuously evolves in comparison to the majority of other sayings which we have adopted to be true.
Jane, I was recently thinking about the saying ‘when the going gets tough the tough get going’ and feeling how I lived that. I took the saying and applied it to my life. Thank goodness for the teachings of Universal Medicine that I am now aware of when I start to push my body too hard.
As a joke present for christmas I got my mum a book of sayings and idioms because she uses a lot – its amazing how many there are, instead of just expressing something we have condensed it all down to a few words.
I love what you have shared about reading Serge’s books- the truth they deliver can leave us feeling expanded or they can cause some tension in our bodies as we resist being all that we can be. What amazing books to be able to connect to us in this way through the energy in the words being expressed. They are gifts for humanity and I am appreciating that right now.
Reading this article I realize a lot of the phrases and sayings that we tend to throw around seem like a ‘curse’ keeping us trapped in a vice-like clasp of the limitations humanity has accepted. There are those little thoughts I might tell myself that I am not good enough that I need to watch out for, yes, but there are also these more engrained concepts perpetuated through the phrases we so readily use. Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy ‘The Sayings’ book by Serge Benhayon has helped me realize this more profoundly too,. The phrases are reminders that we are so much more than what we have settled for, the power that we have to live deeply loving, wise and responsible lives and that we are deeply loved, supported and “held in the magnificence of God’s love always” The contrast of the negating and the disempowering impact of our normal phrases to the truly confirming and empowering support of the “the sayings” in the book shows we have some work to do to bring our daily talk to reflect and honour our true essence.
‘Reading this article I realize a lot of the phrases and sayings that we tend to throw around seem like a ‘curse’ keeping us trapped in a vice-like clasp of the limitations humanity has accepted.’ Great point Golnaz and a powerful sentence. The question is do we choose irresponsibility and thus ‘the limitations humanity has accepted’ or do we break free of the vice-like grasp and bring our much needed expression out in full.
Very beautiful Golnaz. You have inspired me to have this wonderful book in a place where I refer to it way more often than I do.
This reminds me of the importance of paying attention to what we are actually saying or thinking! Not just doing something out of familiarity but being aware of what it really means and if that feels true to us..
Perhaps a very important factor in the sayings that we have in our different cultures and countries, is that they reflect back to us our different ways of thinking about ourselves. With the books by Serge Benhayon, there is no culture that separates us in to individual groups. We are a one humanity. And he encourages us to think it so.
Very true, Shami. There is always a context to the cliches we have in our language, almost always either historical or cultural, which identify them with a certain group. Serge Benhayon’s sayings are timeless and universal.
There are many true sayings and catch phrases too, so it is not ‘sayings’ themselves that are evil but it is yet another way we have bastardised divinity. Familiar sayings that hold wisdom can also remind us of our divinity and that deep down we all resonate with and remember our divine origins.
Well said Deanne. An important reminder to listen to ourselves as we speak, but also to check in with why we are wanting to say what we are saying.
What a valuable topic to write a blog about, I am looking forward to watching out for more of these sayings and reading the thread for what other sayings might reside in the residues of my body. I certainly remember a sharp touting of “children should be seen and not heard!”
This saying never sat well with me. It is one that was easier to discern that is very degrading, oppressive and judgemental.
I like how you describe feeling words in your body. This is such a beautiful tool that I found with Universal Medicine. It’s ground-breaking! Haven’t we all learned in school to perceive words with our heads only?
It is indeed a beautiful tool Felix. I feel I am only just beginning to understand what it means to feel and express from the whole of my body, such has been the imposition of the teachings I grew up with. Universal Medicine has brought a depth of wisdom I have never found anywhere else and to know I have that same wisdom within by connecting to and listening to my body is pure gold.
Sayings are generic and, in my experience, can’t really be truly personalised. The revelations in Serge Benhayon’s ‘The Sayings’ book are indeed amazing, yet I have found that even these, if trotted out in the same way as other sayings, don’t offer true support to the person receiving them. I feel that the true application of all Serge Benhayon’s work, not only the revelations in ‘The Sayings’ book, is for his words to be used to inspire deeper and more personalised revelations that support the evolution of the person expressing as well as the person receiving the wisdom.
Well said Kate, indeed all sayings and quotes can be used in a way that lessens a conversation, for example they may be used to ‘win’ an argument if someone brings in a quote from a respected person, backing up their point and ‘proving’ that it is correct, or even taking sayings out of context and using them as a way not to listen to someone else’s concerns or expression – ‘no pain no gain’ being an example of this.
I love what you explain here Susie, It is so true that there are many ways to abuse even the sayings that hold a truth for all.
I totally agree with you, Jane, that sayings cap our expression and keep us from developing our ability to deliver truth in the moment. Says are empty and when applied in most situations, bring the conversation down rather than offering an opportunity to go deeper or take the conversation to another level.
I had not considered that before Kate, but it’s true. I recall many a conversation where a saying has entered and it ended the conversation. No meaning, no evolution, totally capping for everyone.
Yes Suzan, the common saying people are use to say are banalities to me, asking me to not go further, deeper, to explore more of who I truly am, while the sayings from Serge Benhayon’s book are there to support all of us human beings to be all of who the are and to return to that state of being we are designed for and which we deserve to live.
Great blog Jane and you made me aware of all this sayings that we tend to use to keep ourselves and others unaware of the fact that we are that much more. As you say, with these saying we do keep ourselves from going deeper and to make life about evolution. To me the sayings are part of a momentum we create in life to keep us living a life in the same way we always have done, to not evolve and by any means to not go there.
So true Nico. ‘sayings are part of a momentum we create in life to keep us living a life in the same way we always have done, to not evolve and by any means to not go there’. They are not just stand alone words but a reflection of how we are choosing to live.
That is a good way to describe it Jane, that the sayings we practise are a ‘reflection of how we have chosen to live’, a continuous confirmation of the fact that we have chosen that limitation in our life. The fact that we have to practice these saying over and over is that we know we have limited our lives to a lesser state of being, and every time we feel the pain of it, we need to confirm ourselves of the choices we have made.
So true Nico and by practising these sayings over and over again, we are stubbornly saying yes to comfort and the status quo. it is rather like putting a red flag up against anyone who might ask us to evolve.
Well said Nico. The sayings are used to justify our way of being and come across as sounding pleasing and nice in the way they are said. Yet this does not take away from their true intent and true purpose which is to justify a way of living in separation to who we truly are. This is of course if they are said with no true love in them
Yes Joshua, we mostly use these sayings to justify that we are living in separation of the love that we belong to and we confirm our choice to live in this way over and over again.
And by living them over and over again, they appear to us to be real, but that is the key definition we need to understand. There is a huge difference between the fact of what is true and the fact of what is real, because even a lie can be made to be real when it is not a truth for us at all
I like the discussion that unfolded here, how we use sayings and certain phrases to keep us capped at the same place we have chosen to be and how this is a way to stop us from ever stepping out of that rut and move on to a new way of life.
Mostly the sayings just come out of our mouths out of habit but it is essential to consider the energy in which they have been expressed as so often it is a smokescreen for a much deeper and richer quality of expression available to us.
I like what you write here Emma….We often say these sayings to keep it light, or keep the banter going or to keep the status quo and they are used as smokescreen for a much deeper and richer quality of expression.
“‘Taking energetic responsibility for all that one does and all that one says and thinks is truth in power, for one will see exactly how we can harm or heal in all that we do, say and think. That’s true power!’”
WOW, this quote really speaks to me! I have noticed for a long time now the power of my thoughts, my words and the way in which I express. I have been refining this and catching myself and others when sayings come out without thinking, and really feeling the quality of what was expressed. In our family, we have been changing popular phrases to bring truth into our expression and it makes a huge difference in the way we interrelate with one another. Every aspect of our lives requires refinement and alignment with a lighter, conscious way of expression.
One saying that I heard alot of as a child was no pain no gain. I remember this many times when I go out for my walk now and feel the untruth of these words.
“I have to say my hands are not always so warm now, but whatever their temperature I never worry about the warmth in my heart.” In so many way we get told we are not good enough while we always are what we are, which simply is love.
When you spoke of reading Serge Benhayon’s book I loved the following comment: “Sometimes this leaves me feeling expanded and light and other times I feel a tension in my body. This tension is a gift for it is telling me I am more than I am choosing to live and is pulling me up to my next level of evolution.” The way you have described the tension is spot on. I often want to avoid and distract myself from the tension but when I see it this way I want to embrace it and what it is showing me.
When reading this I realised the sneakiness of such sayings and what a big impact they can have. For example, “If you can’t beat’s, join ’em” almost has some sort of authority that comes with it. It is so commonly used and when it is used it seems to wipe out any sort of exploration of a new way. It is horrible what comes with this saying yet how many question something that is so commonly used. Sneaky and yuck!
Until we look deeper Nikki we don’t even consider the sneaky yuckness, we just think of these sayings are a normal and innocent part of conversation, shown by how commonly we use them.
I see what you mean Jane, most common sayings come with an attitude that life is mean but you can ‘get through it’. They are not uplifting and like you say “provide us with an excuse to remain comfortable” The sayings from Serge Benhayon encourage us to look at our lives philosophically so that we may learn from life and grow.
Thank you for bringing that to our attention Jane, I now realize it is true that there are many sayings that lock us into a certain behavior. For me it was “Make yourself useful” meaning forget who you are, it is what you do that counts.
Some of the sayings that I remember as a child were used as throw away lines to shut down questions, it was a great mechanism for for dismissing an inquisitive child. In our house it would only lead to more questions and the kids challenging the ridiculousness, lies or the meanings of some of the sayings.
Amazing blog. It is so false, all these sayings, and everything that Serge Benhayon presents does make sense to me. It’s such a present; what he brings reminds me of Chris James song: “love is a beholding light, love enriches all of us, love is a beholding light, love just holds us”.
How important it is to express from the heart and not repeating old sayings that distract and serve no purpose at all.
Agreed Marion, to be in our hearts and see the world out of our hearts gives a totally different perspective and picture.
Jane, you have exposed the hidden evil in our everyday language, what a great read.
Yes it is a hidden evil. I find it quite sneaky and hard to put a finger on, but there is something about the saying Jane has mentioned that carry with them something quite full on. Reading your comment Matthew I realise it is evil – how sneaky evil can be!
Yes I agree Matthew, a truly great read that has given me much to ponder…..there are so many throw away lines, sayings and expressions we use to be polite, politically correct, or to divert from a more serious examination of a subject…..many of these have been handed down through the generations and they roll off our tongues without a second thought…..thank you Jane for interesting blog and for giving us all something to think about.
I loved your blog Jane, it really was calling a spade a spade, and pulling the evil out of these so called harmless sayings that have affected many in some way.
Thank you Jane. This exposes a lot about how we hold back from expressing, and how this is a comfort so that we don’t evolve. I used to think I loved some of these sayings. There was something so familiar about them and there was the apparent feeling that when I said them someone else would understand exactly what I meant. Usually they would be used to completely bring a halt to speaking about something- as though they marked a point of understanding in the conversation that we’d all or both mutually reached. But actually they are just a comfort that allowed me, and whoever I was speaking to, to not express the whole truth about something. It’s funny because these sayings are called “expressions” as though they express a lot, and they are also known as “wise” sayings or words. Both of which they are not.
Great point Simone. How often have we used an expression to end a conversation just when we could have taken our expression deeper? We thus avoid an opportunity to be more intimate with another.
well said Jane it is used as a shield when things become too personal or we would be showing more of ourselves. We built walls and ditches with words without even being aware of it anymore as it has become such a part of ‘normal’ conversation.
So true Carolien and we fall for that familiarity without stopping to consider what we are missing out on.
When we let the heart speak, our every word is music to the ears. Heaven is very quotable.
As are you Liane, who lets her heart speak the words of heaven 🙂
Agree!
Thanks Liane, for reminding me, that our hearts do speak from heaven and when we speak like that heaven is with us and any quote or saying that comes form that place will support us in our return to who we are and deserve to be.
Absolutely Liane and as our heart speaks our heart hears.
Jane I heard a saying yesterday which really stood out as words designed to incarcerate people into a life of smallness ‘better to be safe than sorry’.
Yes, I have heard this alot growing up also and really used to challenge me when I felt something to be true this would open up for doubt to come in.
oh Alexis- that’s a good one to lay out on the table for inspection
Yes Alexis I think this is one we have all heard quite a lot growing up and probably spoken ourselves also…. how crippling and contracting are those words when you stop to feel them.
Feeling to add that Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine have shown me how expression is not just in the spoken word, but in everything we do, how we walk, handle objects, look at another, drive – how “expression is everything.”
Thanks for adding this jeannettegold, as this is a deep wisdom Serge Benhayon has shared with us. It makes that every moment is worth our full presence and an opportunity to express the exquisite quality we carry inside.
That every moment is a valuable opportunity is such a beautiful thing to consider and an even greater basis for life when it is lived. It is the best way to get to know yourself and your “own exquisite quality” and then it is an even greater feeling to share this with others. So, so worth it.
Absolutely agree Jeannette and Katinka, we are expressing in every moment, regardless of where we are or what we are doing, and only through being in our full presence can we truly express the love that we are.
A timely blog to read, thank you Jane. I have recently started to be quite frequently pulled up by friends for the words I am using. I am also writing my website and some blogs and have noticed that by changing a word here or there or the order of them that the whole piece feels very different and makes my message fuller and more complete. The big difference in my expression though is when I speak with automatic sayings or from things I have learned from the outside world as opposed to when I express from a place of deep connection with myself and from my inner-heart. With the latter I can feel truth in my body, with the former I can’t.
I agree that most sayings we grew up with are there to either separate us or hold us in comfort. Yet, the sayings from the book by Serge Benhayon resonate truth in my whole body. They are there, as you say, to pull us up. To recognise how far we have come along the path of evolution and how far we still have to go. What is so marvellous also, is that there is no end, the learning is ever evolving!
This was a great read Jane, in that your blog exposes the many pockets of comfort we have in our language and how we communicate to each other. It’s like these old sayings get used when we don’t know what else to say, or hold back what we want to say out of not wanting to expose our or someone else’s choices. We hide behind these sayings.
It is always important to discern, and i know of a few sayings I grew up with of which I never really understood the wisdom they held. For example in Dutch we say what do you have on your liver when someone seem angry, or spit your gal when someone is being frustrated and ‘the hours we sleep before midnight count double’. In these sayings the energetic functioning of the body is described and it shows we hold a deep knowing and wisdom in our bodies that can be connected to.
Those sayings are so insidious Jane just as you describe. They reconfigure us to believe
Iife is less than it truly is and we start living by those remarks that do nothing but reduce us. Bringing light and awareness to these flippant sayings is vital, for every time they are uttered they try to cut us down from being in the fullness of who we are.
I agree Jane, the sayings you mentioned feels cold and empty when compared to those of Serge Benhayon which have so much truth, love and wisdom.
words are mighty and powerful, we can bring another down or up with the words we choose and everything we say has an impact. If we speak badly of others thinking it will not harm them if they cannot hear it we are ignoring the impact it has as what we express or even think is always felt and will cause the other to react wether they are aware of it or not.
What you have expressed so clearly here Carolien is the absolute truth,and something we should all be aware of, not only that which we speak but that which we think impacts the other person, harming or healing, depending on the energy we have chosen in which to think or speak.
yes Rosemary and it highlights the importance of energetic responsibility as it is the energy we chose to move in that determines the quality of our thoughts and expressions. These days if I have a critical or negative though about someone I check in with myself to see where I am at in my quality instead of indulging in the stories that I can unfold my the head.
Yes Carolien we are blessed that these days we are able to catch ourselves with a critical or negative thought before it gets hold and we become immersed in negative and harmful scenarios running on a loop around and around in our head, as once was the case for myself. Learning from the Ancient Wisdom as taught by Serge Benhayon, allowed me to feel the truth that “everything is energy” including our thoughts, bringing with it the responsibility to choose the quality of my thoughts and expressions…… known as energetic responsibility.
I used to think those thoughts were me. Knowing now how our thoughts are generated has given me a very clear and simple (but not always easy) way out of them. When I used to think it was me I would battle my thoughts with thoughts but it would never work and I would feel bad about myself. Now I know you can’t fight thoughts with thoughts, I can only return to my body and the quality I am moving in. So much simpler!
Yes Carolien the battle to control our thoughts is totally useless, crazy as a matter of fact to think we can stop thoughts using thoughts, thoughts that are usually of a negative nature, as the thoughts will be castigating us for not controlling our thoughts in the first place, and around it goes. I also have found that returning to my body and becoming aware of the energy I am choosing allows a space to let go of the thoughts. I agree Carolien so much simpler!
Very true Rosemary and yet there is all the while an industry built on ‘positive thinking’ mantras etc. Your comment exposed exactly why over the centuries this has never brought true change. We can change our thoughts to be somewhat more positive but if we do not change the quality of energy we hold in our body there is no healing and no true shift.
..but are left to think/ believe we have changed. This is how tricky the mental energy is.
Yes very tricky Carolien, because in the end we either give up completely because we realise the positive thinking and mantras have not help us achieve the sustained changes we have been looking for, or we convince ourselves that they have, yet this is all part of the manipulation…doesn’t matter whether we give up or feel the positive thinking/mantras have worked either way keeps us disconnected from our inner being and the truth of who we are.
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absolute Rosemary. The giving up one is very strong and what keeps the industry of self-help and spiritual practices going as we give up and then another thing comes up and we think maybe this will bring the answer and we ride it for a while until that turns out to not be ‘it’ either. Most people on the spiritual path keep switching and I was on a a path like that too until I found Universal Medicine. I never had to look outside again as the changes were now bringing me truly back to me.
There are so many sayings that just give us an excuse to not take responsibility for our life, who we in truth are and the impact we have.
“Could it be that most sayings actually can stunt our communication and are used when we are unwilling to go deeper with our expression?” I would say this is the entire purpose of sayings, as when you look at most there is little common sense in them, it is like they are designed to stop us living with a loving way with ourselves as they tend to be quite harsh and unforgiving.
Ah! well said Vanessa – this rings true for me. With believing these sayings we are at the mercy of them and live as if they were true, rather than seeing the harshness and unforgiving nature of them.
Vanessa, this is a good point. Those sayings want to keep us unaware of what is truly going on. Through their rythm they try to penetrate our body and bring us in a state of numbness, almost comparable to a drug where we see the world through the eyes of illusion. They have a much deeper impact on us than we think they have.
Sayings come in and cut things off and say “end of conversation”. They leave no space for exploration and they stop evolution in its tracks.
So true Nikki, without even knowing it at times we use sayings to ‘end a conversation’ or to fill a space that could have been taken deeper and to gloss over things we don’t want to delve into.
Yes, sayings of little common sense encourage a way of being void of our sense.
Isn’t this just one of many ways in which we create for ourselves a reality that we feel comfortable in even though it’s not truly evolving? One could say this is ok but it doesn’t really communicate to those around us that it’s important to be truthful, and you experienced this as a child with the ‘cold hands warm heart’ saying.
I think it’s important to bring back the ease of expressing and at times when needed poke a hole in those sayings that don’t really deliver any form of truth, just being used as a cover up for not wanting to take more responsibility in the way we are with ourselves and in life.
Sayings have two outcomes, to keep you where you are, to accept your place and the hole you dug yourself into because that is as good as it gets or there is truth.
A very exposing and much needed blog, thank you Jane. I love how you exposed the energy behind so many of these sayings. They are so well known, they act as strong ideals and beliefs that are so ingrained in the body if we are not aware of the true energy behind these sayings. There is certainly no love behind the ones you listed here, they all take us away from self-care and self-love, to push ourselves, keep trying hard, all actually very damaging to ourselves and our bodies. And yes, I remember the old one, ‘cold hands, warm heart’, when I was quite young and very occasionally went to local dances with my parents, where old men would make that remark to me when they felt my hands (which were quite cold) during the progressive dances that I sometimes took part in. A very damaging saying if the recipient of the remark had warm hands as you shared.
Yeah Jane that was a wonderful read for me as I had never think about sayings and how they influence me! When I started to ponder on it I was shocked about the power they have on me. So I only can agree it is really worth it to keep an eye on this old sayings as you never know when they spread their poison so to speak.
No word, saying or conversation is innocent and non-impacting. Everything in our life has an effect. Thank you for making this very clear in your blog.
You are right Jane when you point out how sayings can cap us and stop us from expressing truthfully. We had someone in our lives who’s whole conversation was sayings and it clearly stopped anyone from getting close. There are sayings that haunt me and are clearly there to make me feel powerless like – you’ve made your bed, now lie in it – when this is totally untrue and I can always change the quality of my choices and change my life if needs be.
What a great collection of sayings/proverbs in all their comfortable and dishonest glibness, brushing over what is really going on and giving us a handy drawer to pull out for whatever the particular situation might be. a far cry from the sayings by Serge Benhayon, as you point out.
Absolutely Gabriele. Sayings for comfort vs Sayings for Evolution.
I know which I choose hands down.
I have noticed more and more how people often talk in cliche’s and how with each phrase of words, there is an ideal or belief expressed in the body in a certain way, with gestures, postures or other animated expression. It is curious how we identify ourselves with these cliche’s and how we think we own them but actually they own us.
Endorsing and living by a saying that is not true is very harmful for the body and our well being.
So true Lieke. We don’t realise what we are saying yes to when we blindly accept and adopt these false sayings.
We rarely even consider the meaning of sayings, our parents say them to us and we pass them on to the next generation without stopping to feel the truth of them.
Absolutely loved this Jane, expression truly is everything. These sayings that we use as throw aways comments a lot of the time, can in fact deeply impact how we communicate and feel. So very true. We are not only allowing sayings to impact us, but lesson what is there to in truth express to on another.
Growing up I always loved sayings, quotes by ‘famous people in history’ and used to write them regularly in people’s greetings cards as a gesture of positivity, affirmation, reflection or confirmation for the person. Understanding about quality in everything, being everything as taught through the Teachings of Universal Medicine, have opened my eyes to see and feel the difference in the written word through for example a written quote, or verbal one. The words may sound amazing, assuring and say great truth(s), and yet they are missing the quality, or more the point – a livingness behind the word expressed that makes them come alive. Quotes, sayings are sharing of wisdoms, and such wisdom is something lived not intellectualised through academics/education or status.The Sayings, by Serge Benhayon contain living wisdom and is one of my ultimate favourite books for the endless lived truths it speaks to expand a person out of their malaise and into their entirety.
That is so true Zofia, we have had intellectual ideals that sound nice but feel empty. You can feel such a difference in the quality of a saying when it comes from the wisdom of living a loving life every day.
Thank you Jane, this reminds me of an old saying ‘the noisy wheel get the most oil or grease’ or some such, as I feel into this say it describes how you can be self-loving and before there is a noise do regular maintenance, how simple is that! Life can be that simple as Serge Benhayon presents if only we start with self-love and self-nurturing acts at least.
I have also pondered the fact that ‘sayings’ roll off our tongues as facts but with little truth. As I had been taught, I told my children “sticks and stones can break your bones but words can never harm you”. What a dismissive lie! No wonder we learn to bury our hurts. In contrast, Serge Benhayon’s sayings offer truth and healing.
Yes Jane, it’s amazing that such sayings or proverbs are seemingly so innocent and yet can hold a person captive for a lifetime and in this it’s like a curse that sticks its hold… until released via exposing the truth behind some of these sayings as you share with us. One that springs to mind “sticks and stones may break your bones, but names will never hurt you” – in other words diminishing the power of a curse through a name calling or defaming when in fact this emotional/psychological perspective is far worse and longer lasting than a stick that can break. In other words.. it’s ok to keep calling on and attacking a person’s wellbeing/sanity because that will never hurt them, and, as a receiver one will never be hurt by this action i.e. curse.
Yes Zofia – this is such a common saying and it is so absurd as the emotional pain that comes from verbal abuse can last a lifetime, whereas broken bones are healed very quickly by comparison and we all know this truth in our bodies.
Yes, we just have to take one look at online bullying and abuse with relation to suicides to know how harmful words can be.
This saying about “sticks and stones” is particularly interesting when you think about cyber abuse. Here is an incredibly damaging form of bullying, which is ‘just words’ and yet enormously damaging to reputations, health, and even one’s psychology.
Yes great point Simon. In my experience this has been the greatest form of abuse.
It has very real and tangible ramifications, be that psychological impact that leads to people withdrawing from society… right through to numerous counts of suicide and self harm as the only perceived way out.
The sayings in the book Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy ‘The Sayings’ book by Serge Benhayon is as you share truth, and it often is uncomfortable reading, exposing, showing us what we accept and where we are at. But I would rather that as it always shows the truth of the love and divinity we also are and when you feel that and know that it is such a gift – greater than any other.
I have written about this also as it is pernicious how much we use sayings and how for most hold the opposite of what is actually true! For example “he is so full of himself” is an insult when in truth to be full of yourself is divine and what is needed from everyone!
Great point Vanessa, and with this true understanding here it is no wonder that both Men and Women often struggle to be full of themselves as in their true selves because we has allowed for such false truths to interfere with the simple truth.
Yes Vanessa so true. Saying’s hold such a falsity for what is true. Debunking sayings and speaking from our bodies known wisdom is a simple offering of truth and in effect, if we were to express to someone that they are indeed ‘full of themselves,’ that is a divine confirmation as it is known and deeply felt from within us.
Brilliant blog Jane. There are so many sayings in our society today that are mostly used without consideration of their true meaning, and accepted as a part of expressing or explaining who we are. Yet in truth, when you stop and discern what is truly being said, what energy is being delivered through the words at play, we can feel they are actually like a spell that hold us in a configuration that is not true, not who we naturally are that act to keep us existing in a reduced and lessened way. In this way sayings that are simply repeated without connection to our truth, then exist in the body as a loveless quality and as such become an activity driven through the mind that serves to keep us moving in separation from the Love we in fact are and from exploring living in the fullness knowing and expressing our truth. Our truth is our knowing of all that we are in the Oneness of our Love. And words expressed from this quality calls, confirms and holds all equal in the grandness of all that we are and nothing less.
Yeah that is a great point Carola that these untruths then reside in the body, and then we live with that ill running through us influencing every next thought and action, it is actually true evil.
Carola, great comment, your words on sayings that ‘they are actually like a spell that hold us in a configuration that is not true, not who we naturally are that act to keep us existing in a reduced and lessened way.’ sum it up. We settle into a groove which is not us and express from there, when in fact there is a magnificence of expression within us ready and waiting and then there’s the saying and you can indeed feel how empty and cold these are in our bodies and how they go nowhere. True expression expands and enlightens us and another whereas using sayings puts a damper on, it stops real expression dead and reduces us all. Thank you, your comment has helped me see how dead those sayings and how truly evil for our real expression they are. No matter how awkward we may feel, it’s preferable to be that, as long as we stay connected to us and present that, nothing else is needed. The crutch of sayings hobbles us.
This is a good point Carola, to look at the configuration and how the sayings keep us in a certain configuration, where it is diffcult to escape if we are not aware. From this point of view the abuse of those sayings is getting even deeper exposed.
I agree Kerstin, I can feel how much we are wanting to stay comfortable with these saying and how much we choose to be blind to what is really at play. Amazing to feel the enormity of irresponsibility.
Yes the abuse gets deeper exposed. I can also feel that it is only a choice to be unaware of what is at play, the saying are just one example. Much appreciation for Jane’s blog that helps us to open up to truth.
Spot on Carola – we carry these sayings around in our heads, and in our bodies… they play out in an almost unconscious way (it might be better to say that it makes it much easier for us to keep choosing them) and can last a lifetime. They are effective at the time in getting us to get outside, or push through to learn something we don’t really want to, but there is a lifetime cost that is never factored in.
“Could it be that most sayings actually can stunt our communication and are used when we are unwilling to go deeper with our expression?” Going deeper with our expression calls us to go deeper within ourselves, to connect to our body and to connect to what we feel is truth and allow the words to arise from our body, rather than recall words that have been said before.
Beautifully said Donna. With this quality of connection present there will be many words of wisdom expressed from us all, as these words will then simply be a reflection of the quality of love and truth we all are, know and naturally share.
Yes Donna and when we go deeper into the body we feel more, and we don’t always like what we feel as often we have lived our lives very protected and hard, but once that is felt underneath is always – always – the gold the divinity of our origins and it is in my experience a very physically felt experience so expansive and sweet, clear and powerful. It is a tragedy that we live life not from this place but from fear and protection.
True, because every situation is in truth different to any other, even if only slightly and thus requires exactly what needs to be delivered to get to truth.
This is a great awareness Gabriele – so when something is repeated and repeated from rote – it is a long way from the true source it originated from, therefore it’s true meaning and intention. A bit like Chinese whispers, can become bastardised along the way. There is responsibility to repeating anything we hear.
Great point Gabriele. The thing I love about Universal Medicine presentations is that no matter how many times I have attended over the past 17 years, the same subject matter has been expanded on and reiterated in completely different ways each time. Each presentation of the same material always offers opportunities to feel new depths of meaning from the same messages. Evolving and ever deepening awareness can never be supported by rote learning and repetition of sayings and concepts.
So very true Gabrielle; a timely reminder of the fact every situation is in truth different, therefore requiring a relevant, different response.
Yes Gabriele I agree and this is why our life is so colorful.
So it does Donna, therefore clearly confirming that “sayings actually can stunt our communication”. Therefore could it also be said that our current education model, being based on rote learning, is stunting us from going deeper with our communication, from connecting to our bodies and the truth and wisdom they offer?
Great point Donna.
Spot on, Donna, beautifully said.
This is such a great way of explaining this and feels spot on, it is amazing really how many times we settle for what we hear rather then feel everything about what we have been presented.
Well said Donna and very true. I rarely use sayings but when I do it never feels it’s me expressing.
Agreed Marika, it is a totally different experience when we bring more energetic awareness and energetic responsibility to the way we live and express in life as it is easily discerned what is truth and heals and what is not truth which harms us by lacing us with ideals and beliefs.
Thank you Jane, reading your article reminded me of a saying I grew up with regards to exercising my body and that was “pain today strong tomorrow” crazy! This type of saying come laced with ideals at the expense of the body as we need to harden our bodies from the abuse inflicted and go against our innate love and truth in our bodies.
So true Francisco, another one that comes to mind is ‘ no pain , no gain’ and how truly harming to our bodies that saying is and yet I hear words to those effect very day in my work place.
That’s a very common saying Susan. It suggests that you can’t grow without experiencing pain or that any growth will always be painful which is simply not always true – in fact it can often be a very, very joyful experience.
In Dutch ther is a similar saying “Wie mooi wil zijn moet pijn lijden”, which means “If you want to be beautiful, you need to suffer”. When you write it down, it is too crazy!
Ah yes Francisco, the old ‘no pain, no gain’ saying that has set so many people from the 1980’s to this very day into a torturous path of self harm through exercise. Flogging the very vehicle that takes us home.
Whys is it that we believe something to be true simply because it has been said more than once?
Kylie I wonder if we actually do believe these things are true or if we simply choose not to challenge them as a result of our deeper choice to remain in a self induced comatose state.
Self harm through exercise is enormous, then after the exercise it is more flogging with a glass of wine or three.
Matthew there are certain obsticle races that have become very fashionable that give people alcohol as they cross the finish line, so you don’t even have to wait until you’ve showered to have a drink!
Yes Francisco, “no pain, no gain” I recently joined a gym and in the induction did more than my body needed and I was in so much pain the next days, and then that old adage popped into my head wanting to make it ok that I had hurt my body. Utterly crazy as it is so acceptable in the world of gym and is actually even desirable as it ‘shows you have done some good’. What it does show is we have become very used to being divorced from our bodies and normalised with not treating ourselves as precious.
‘No pain, no gain’ came straight to mind when reading your comment Francisco. I agree Vanessa, it is totally and utterly crazy to push our body to where it is in pain and worn with pride as a symbol to the world that we are being good at exercising etc – it is the same with pushing the body to extreme limits working so hard without breaks or awareness of aching shoulders and backs that we are creating for ourselves. I am appreciating more just how precious my body actually is and respecting it enough to treat it differently.
Vanessa- I remember one day going bushwalking for 4 hrs with a friend and the next day I complained of suffering from aching legs and sore calves- I was told “no pain, no gain” .
I now know that our body reminds us how we are treating it – lovingly so or not.
This seems to be one that we can pocket for any time, any place, and all weathers. I’ve used it at work, when studying, when carrying loads of shopping up a hill. Any situation in which I thought struggle and pain was a necessary part of life and a ‘good’ thing. Now I can see how much lack of self-worth was in the choice to live that way. I wonder who first coined this phrase and WHAT it was coined for? Certainly was designed for an outcome such a profit or gain, and not for any person.
My body is precious and I can honour its preciousness with every step I take and every choice I make. I thinks that is just so beautiful.
Crazy indeed Francisco – and the saying of ‘no pain no gain’ (or is it game?) is equally as alarming. These sayings excuse us from living the love we are and have a false air of ‘getting away with it’. Our bodies are the marker of every choice we make, so even if we cover it up with a saying and brush off the abuse, we never really get away with anything, the body will talk sooner or later.
I like what you have said here Rachael. It takes a little time to realise that everything matters and energetic responsibility really does mean everything. It was huge when the penny dropped on this one and it completely changed my life.
…and the body would say ‘no pain = no pain’ simple. There can never be gain in pain.
Thank you Francisco. It is interesting that many of the sayings that I know do relate to the body and they all ask me in different ways to remain disconnected to my body.
That is a massive belief – that the more pain and suffering we go through the stronger we will be in the future, crazy when love is the ultimate strength.
There’s a lot in these words Jane. A lot of Truth and also a grand invitation to have a deeper look into the words we use and the thoughts we think. To me the last one is the one to take a more honest look. Especially when I’m on my own, I often choose to check-out, rather than feel the Love that’s there within my heart. When choosing to connect there’s such enormous Love, yet there’s been a million times that I chose to not be there. Though it’s changing now. This blog confirms the importance of that choice. Not only for me, but in fact for everyone.
When realising that everything I did affected everyone it was a big wake up. The ultimate wake up call for responsibility and it was felt very deeply indeed.
Everything we do affect everyone. There’s a lot in these few words. Because what is everything and who are everyone. It’s easy to go into overwhelm, thinking of being responsible for everyone all of the time, is just too much. What it actually means is that we are to take responsibility for ourselves, 24 hours a day by connecting to Our heart and Love that’s within. This requires practice and a lot of honesty as hardly anyone is raised with energetic responsibility and that we’re choosing to be with our hearts or not from the day we are born, in fact even from within the womb.
I agree Matthew. It is very easy to think that in the privacy of our own head/mind/thoughts that we are in our own little world, but those thoughts have the ability to do great harm. It may not look as brutal as a physical assault, for example, but energetically it is the same if we live in a way that allows those kinds of thoughts to enter us.
Many of these sayings are devoid of any self responsibility as they justify or negate our actions without us truly feeling what has been expressed and whether there is truth or not in that expression. The sayings block us from going deeper into our bodies to feel what needs to be expressed at that time. They feel so empty of love and truth.
Hi Anne yes I agree. Sayings are a way for us to negate the truth felt from our bodies. It is also a form of recall, as we are sharing in something that is not a truth felt from within us or a lived experience.
These saying are not just words as every word or phrase comes with an energy, and so they are configured in such a way to keep people stuck or bound by them, to believe they are true. They are catchy to remember and repeat but only for the mind to latch onto and regurgitate or act on.
So true Sandra. These sayings act as a form of diversion away from the truth, from the true power and wisdom that comes through connecting to the Love we are.
True Sandra, and so if the mind is satisfied then we tend to never question the body. And yet the body is ‘the marker of all truth’ (by Serge Benhayon) and indeed it is.
Yes,they are catchy but repeating the words is no different to eating food laced with arsenic.
Wow Sandra, what a great point. These sayings are catchy, easy to remember and easily recognised – all part of the hook to keep us playing small with our expression.
At a Serge Benhayon event yesterday about how the way we live is medicine, I heard someone say they had “spent their health on their wealth”. I’d never heard that before, but how apt to describe how we place our bodies second to succeed in life, and then wonder what happened.
The end of that saying is that they then had to “… spend their wealth on their health”. Is placing our bodies low on our list of priorities worth it, does it give us value for life, or value for money? I think not.
It is a huge subject Heather and something that I see all over the world, having made significant changes in the way I now work I am in huge appreciation for Serge Benhayon and all that he has lived, shared and expressed as it really does support us in all of our choices regarding living with quality and grace while working.
Yes, so true Heather. I was speaking to someone recently about the success of our mutual client. The person I was speaking to was adamant that the client was extremely successful because of their financial situation. I challenged the conversation on his perception of success as this particular client is frequently stressed and explosive in conversation and this must have an impact on their health and well being. For me, all my life I have known my health is more important than becoming wealthy what I did not realise was how far a way from living a truly healthy lifestyle I was. It is only since the teachings of Universal Medicine that I have learnt what good medicine is and how success is so far from the ideals and pictures we have created.
Interesting that the sayings that do hold truth in them are not so frequently shared; as opposed to those that hinder our truth, and are widely known and said.
Great point Kylie, I wonder why we hold back truth in favour of dulling our expression?
As my Mum passed last month, I was struck by another saying (from Esoteric Philosophy) – “that true wealth is found in the love you have expressed and shared with others.” This was certainly the experience I witnessed in those final weeks and months.
Thats a good one, I haven’t heard that either. I don’t mind sayings like that because they are actually true.
Great point Heather, the body is played with like a puppet as the head dominates and determines everything. Success comes in many forms and many of which have consequences to our health but it is put down to just getting old or it was the sport they played when they were young (which is a very common excuse for many problems).
That’s a great saying – I echo Kylie, in that it’s interesting that the true sayings are the ones we have not heard before!
This article certainly shows the falsity in the saying ‘sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me’… and it is pure irresponsibility to think that they don’t… for even when hidden by a smile, or in an seemingly harmless saying, if it is not of truth, we are all still affected.
A beautiful blog showing the true power of words and the harm of sayings said with such flippancy that few stop to feel what they are really asking of us. It is great to highlight the responsibility we have when we choose to repeat what doesn’t support us or others through their repetition.
One saying that keeps coming to mind reading all the comments here is ‘Don’t judge a book by its cover’, I can’t help but feel there is truth in this saying as we do tend to judge what we see on the outside, rather than feel the gorgeousness on the inside. If we only saw each others souls and not the outer body, we wouldn’t have all the issues we have today, the world would be a very different place.
Great blog Jane, about a very simple subject that can keep us trapped in old belief systems. The moment a proverb or motto comes up it is a warning sign that we are buying into an old system of living, stuck in what many people have running in their lives too, common themes that have built up over generations. Looking at the examples you give, exposes how they are often excuses to not to make more loving choices for ourselves. I agree with you, the sayings of Serge Benhayon are profound truth, to be pondered to deepen our relationship with ourselves for our own evolution, this way moving all of us together in our connected evolution, rather than the common sayings that keep us in the same old round.
It is interesting, but some sayings are so ingrained I even did not realize it until reading your blog Jane, and subconsciously, even if I did not act on them anymore, their harming and distracting energy was still in the background, wanting to give me guilt feelings when I do not act on it. Very interesting and good to expose and get totally free from them.
every communication has an effect, whether we want to know it or not. Too often do we say things without being willing to feel what it is we are saying and the impact it has on those hearing it. It is a big lack in responsibility and I know I used to want to have my ‘freedom’ to not have to weight each word. It was too much to have to do that. Now that I understand the grandness of the impact o every communication no matter how small or seemingly big, I am learning to become very responsible in not only what I say, the exact wording and also how and why I say it.
This is such an interesting topic to explore. I know I have used proverbs and sayings as ways to fill conversation rather than considering their true meaning. It is sort of the easy way out of giving advice, in the sense that we can just say them because they are there to say. When actually, and as you have shared here, we have to consider the true meaning behind what we are saying. It really exposes a lot. One woman the other day said to me that we always use the phrase ‘everything in moderation’ but that she knows our heads have a different interpretation of that to the body. It only goes to show how far we have twisted our words to make them convenient rather than to see the truth first.
Great blog Jane i know I adopted many sayings in my life without ever discerning them or feeling what the impact may be. They were basically the rules of life. Serge Benhayon has changed the rule book and is showing us what true sayings are: inspirational, evolutionary and straight from heaven.
We tend to use sayings as hollow phrases without actually feeling what it is we are expressing and so we reinforce our superficial way of communication not wanting to be aware of the consequences. Saying are not true simply because they are a sayings and neither are they all negative as some hold great wisdom and a deeper knowledge of who we are and how we function. It is in the depth of the connection and responsibility we allow ourselves to go to that will make us feel wether what we are expressing and communicating is harmful or healing.
Jane the way saying can affect our entire day and life is quite remarkable, the examples you’ve given provide “food for thought” so to speak. When I hear a saying I was told when young i go into auto pilot, ignoring how i feel and acting out a command a bit like being hypnotised. I’d not really considered this before but the saying are faster than thinking and get in the way of true choices I may make, unless i et go of them.
Its takes responsibility to commit to express fully. That doesn’t mean necessarily long sentences, but more the words that fully express what it is that is there to be said. I know I for one often like to take short cuts, but developing a stillness in myself lets just the right words come out at the right time.
A saying that came to me yesterday was ‘never work with children and animals’, in my career as a photographer I have always loved photographing children and animals as they are very natural in front of the camera, i guess this saying is because children and animals are less rigid and will not just sit there and do exactly as you say and find it hard to put on a false smile, but for me capturing their natural playfulness was all part of the fun. These sayings are so harmful as this could easily have put me off from photographing children and animals and i’m sure has put other photographers off.
The power of our words and their effects on others can deeply be felt by this article thank you for exposing the truth of what is really going on. This offers one a choice to look and see how we have been effected and how we effect others also and the responsibility we have with this.
A saying is merely the end point of energy, therefore it in itself is nothing at all other than the ‘face’ of the energy that proceeds it.
Interesting point Alexis!
Jane I love how you have described the quality of the ‘Sayings’ in Serge Benhayon’s book. I agree with every word, summed up beautifully by, ‘Sometimes this leaves me feeling expanded and light and other times I feel a tension in my body. This tension is a gift for it is telling me I am more than I am choosing to live and is pulling me up to my next level of evolution.’
You are so right Jane, the energy behind a lot of sayings really makes them more of a curse than anything else and they are supposed to come packed with some sort of wisdom. But where is the so called wisdom coming from?
Agreed Kev. Most of our commonly accepted sayings are like a curse as they do not reflect our truth in any way. They are in fact harmful as they are lies that mis-lead us to believe that we are far less that who we are and to accept existing in ways that is far from the greatness we in truth are. Activity driven from our minds is always in search for ways to keep us from knowing that our true power and wisdom is lived through the heart from the Love we are.
Great exposure Jane on these sayings that feel so empty and untrue and just highlights how we can easily disempower ourselves through the words we choose…. The deeper we connect with our bodies, our words become so much more powerful and truthful simply because they are coming from our bodies and not from
our heads….
Great blog Jane! These ‘innocent’ phrase pander to our spirit, our needy emotional empty side, and leave us void of any true truth. In many ways the evil in these are more impactual if not equal to firing a bullet at someone as it can cap them from living who they truly are for lifetimes to come
Serge Benhayon brings to humanity true ‘sayings’ – ones that are worth deeply pondering, which bring true meaning to words and which offer evolution.
Sayings in themselves can be used either way – either to deliver a curse, or to deliver truth. Having said that, even a true saying is only true if it is lived.
Well said Adam, ‘even a true saying is only true if it is lived’ ….. if the truth is not lived, we may as well be saying ‘bla, bla, bla’ as it will not be heard and the truth will not be felt.
You offer an important distinction Adam, unless we live by the words of truth we speak, we are not speaking words of truth. It takes us all to a new level of responsibility.
Very true Adam. Every time we open our mouths we either harm or heal and that choice is always ours to make. This is where we need to be very honest with ourselves, because often we have the intention to heal but the reverse occurs. This is because we can speak words of truth but unless that truth is lived, the words will ring out hollow. No truth = no love = harm. A simple equation we tend to ignore when we are enjoying the sound of the knowledge we can regurgitate in place of living in full, the love that we are.
Jane this is brilliant, and what you share here benefits us all. Thank you for taking the time to write this so that we can all learn from what you have observed. I also appreciate Serge Benhayon on a whole other level, for without him many of us would not have the freedom to think outside the walls of the common lines we have been fed. Thanks to you Jane and your commitment to self and others, you have exposed for us something super important. I look forward to observing all the many sayings I have in my life and see whether they serve or impede me.
Allowing the casualness of sayings which do not deliver truth to be a part of our lives perpetuates the casualness of how we are with truth. We are not here to change how the world chooses, but it is a responsibility to move and express according to the quality of what our hearts and bodies know, for that is a reflection that love will never hold back.
Where do these common sayings come from? But from a picture we have first taken on. When I first used to write, it would always be an image I would see first before the words came. Images make up our whole world. What we have to discern is when we have an image come into us, where did it come from? Move in the quality of truth, love and equality, images which are loveless will not touch us. Be responsible of the quality of our movements, and we are responsible for the quality of the images and hence words and sayings in life.
There is a feeling in all these sayings and cliches of laziness and or given-up-ness…of just saying ‘whatever’ because life isn’t what we want it to be, a resignation of this is just the way it is, and in the process we avoid expressing what we are truly feeling.
Great blog to ponder on Jane. I recall thinking ‘cold hands warm heart’ as being a silly saying that made not the slightest bit of sense, but despite this, at some point later on, I heard myself repeating it. However, there were many proverbs that I did feel held truth eg a stitch in time makes 9, don’t put off until tomorrow what can be done today, never let the sun set on an argument, more haste – less speed, always choose your words wisely, to name but a few.
When you consider how loaded with judgement and ideals these sayings are you begin to see how much we can give our power away to words and use them in very careless and damaging ways. With sayings and words there is great responsibility in how we use them and Jane you have beautifully exposed this fact. How we use words and sayings also reveals so much about how willing we truly are to go deeper in knowing and living the true us in life.
Jane I found it so interesting what you shared as I have often felt the same about sayings, as if they box us somehow and hold us from being and bringing our all. I can feel the real push in many of them to disregard how we feel and how imposing they can be about how we ‘should’ act and behaviour. Your blog beautifully exposes this fact and allows the reader to feel what truth in expression really feels like and to know that we do not have to define ourselves by external measures but to innately trust what we feel and know inside.
I loved what you expressed about Serge Benhayon’s books of sayings. I have found they always deliver truth, often to a depth that I can feel my body ‘getting’ but my mind only getting a level of. Unlike other sayings books I have read, the words never pander to us, or gloss over anything. When I read any saying in these books, I am brought to a stop, become more still and feel a deeper part of myself.
There are many sayings from my childhood that I didn’t even consider what they meant until I was an older adult. I remember being shocked when I realised what one of these sayings was about and that for many years it had been allowed it to be, thinking it was a harmless saying. The repetitive ones we hear like ‘life wasn’t meant to be easy’ can become part of your being and set the expectations you have about life and what you accept as normal. This limits and reduces the magnificence of what we and life can be about.
So true about them becoming a part of your being, like a programming that constantly runs in the background as in computers.
Here’s one, “dont get too big for your boots” whilst being told at the same time you need to be more confident. A bit of reprogramming to do there I reckon:-)
Exactly Fiona, these sayings reduce the truth of words and therefore reduce our expression. These sayings are like trying to squish the words into a box and putting a lid on it.
Saying a lot of sayings, requires us to use a lot of re-call in our minds! Truth lives, and is expressed from the whole body which gives rise to a greater form of thinking. Sometimes these ‘sayings’ are used playfully, but a lot of the time they are used when one has chosen not to connect with all of who they are in a moment. Each moment has a gem for us to express.
Brilliant Harrison. “Saying a lot of sayings, requires us to use a lot of re-call in our minds!” Saying’s disconnect us from the one truth of all and that’s the wisdom shared from our bodies. Sayings are old beliefs that only hinder our true expression felt from the body.
‘Truth lives’, here here Harry. Saying sayings that are void of truth is reducing the level of expression down to the narrowest point and communicates emptiness. We are so huge! And connected to it all! So why settle for less then true expression in each moment?
So true Harry, it is about expression or lack there of.
I smiled reading your blog Jane, having grown up in a household run on sayings. I recall my mother, who would rage at cars, appliances and even pairs of scissors (??!!), teaching me that “a bad workman blames their tools”. Hmmm…the hypocrisy never seemed to register.
Another saying in our household was “a job worth doing is worth doing well”. Not so bad you might say…actually it would wonderful if more people lived by such a maxim. The problem with this one is that it was thickly laced with a dissatisfied perfectionism. Nothing was “well” enough to satisfy its standards. I still hear those words in my ears at times, an old curse, living itself through my body…pushing and going and critiquing brutally. When those words are echoing through my mind, I know it is time to stop and look with close and loving attention to what I am doing and the how I am doing it.
Absolutely Rachel re the quote – “a job worth doing is worth doing well” – it is indeed about looking at what’s there lacing the actual saying and equally in how it’s used, the context, as well as a person themselves receiving it. If it’s used and received in this lack of being good enough to reinforce low self-worth, or striving for perfectionism, then the saying becomes what is actually is – a curse to curtail, not words to evolve.
It’s a bit like swearing in a way as so much that could be said is cut short into a few words, none of which allow the truth to be expressed.
So true Jeanette…and as with swearing they always come loaded with unspoken emotions – which are always felt even though they aren’t spoken.
Yes very true Paula, they can always be felt, which can be very confusing at times. Unspoken words speak volumes as they say.
Unless what we say comes from our body at that moment, then in my experience it has been very harmonious and helpful. You are quite right, Jeanette.
Exactly, Jeanette, when swearing is used to emphasise what’s being said, the swear words denigrate everything that’s being shared. Swearing often seems to be used to be ‘cool’ to ‘fit in’, personally, I find it very offensive and very off-putting, almost like being slapped, even if the swearing isn’t directed at me.
Jane, you are so right about these sayings. They are empty and totally put us into disregard in our bodies. What you have shared is very revealing.
Our words are so powerful. I love the comparison you have made Jane between the words we say as a matter of habit, not considering what they actually mean vs. words written in full awareness of the effect they have on every level.
We use them as props – not to feel, not to go deeper, not to explore what is going on in truth in ourselves or in the world. Preservers they are, of a lack-lustre status quo, everyone scrabbling to be anything other than their glorious selves.
Preservers indeed. They are words re-hashed to fit what we think a situation is. Using our grandparents’ grandparents’ grandparents’ phrases to describe what is happening right now under our noses. Words which say, ‘nothing has changed here, it’s ok. We don’t have to change. and we certainly don’t have to pay attention to what we are feeling right now. Here’s a bit of triteness and a cookie. On your way.’
I agree Rachel. These sayings are like a handbrake on the car of evolution and our return to being who we really are. They excuse us from developing or exploring the more that life is about.
Agreed Rachel they are but shields to keep true connection at bay, both to ourselves and others.
How powerful words are. They can stall our evolution, or hasten it. How important then that we look to these expressions, no matter how small, how apparently trivial.
‘Using our grandparents’ grandparents’ grandparents’ phrases to describe what is happening right now under our noses. Words which say, ‘nothing has changed here, it’s ok. ‘ … exactly Naren …. actually a LOT has happened since my grandparents era, let alone their grandparents. Some of it’s definitely a lot worse but there is much that’s improved, the fact that we’re even having this conversation shows progress. I can’t think of anyone I know who would feel the saying ‘children should be seen and not heard’ holds any truth whatsoever. Even if it’s used as a joke, the energy is still the same in the saying and very harmful.
The whole world has moved on since those phrases were coined. They have a stale scent, like old clothes packed away for too long. And like old clothes they do not fit the flavour of where we are, how we live and the issues we face in the current era.
But what I love, is that the teachings of the Ageless wisdom transcend these teachings by eons – and yet they are always applicable to human life, all of us, no matter what age, nationality or experience.
It just shows that the quality of a saying depends upon its source – Soul, or anything but.
Rachel words are extremely powerful and if understood how energetically they impact us we can see how often we are damnation and cursing.
So true that words are incredibly powerful. It is worth spending time really discerning the quality and the meaning of what we are saying, because as this blog states, our words can create our reality.
So very true, Rebecca. By being aware of our words we are also acknowledging that we are so very powerful. Choosing to not be aware of the quality in which we use words is choosing to not acknowledge our responsibility in expressing ourselves with that power.
There could be a book or many books written on the power of words. The power in not only what we say, but how we say it, what quality we say it in and the intention behind our words.
absolutely Heather all these things matter immensely when we realise that words are energy and energy is always felt.
And that is the science behind words, Heather. Such science exposes the fallacy in the children’s rhyme that ends “…and words will never hurt me”. Because words can hurt, and can cut deeper than any blade. How they do that is through the delivery of not syllables and syntax, but through precise configurations of intention. And likewise words can reveal and illuminate, and even heal through the same precision.
Its awesome to see them side by side, as you really get to feel the ridiculousness of it all and how far off we are as a society. Great to have people representing truth in words like Serge Benhayon does.
Jane, since reading your article so many sayings have come to me, a couple of examples are, ‘children should be seen and not heard’, ‘never work with children and animals’, the harmful thing about many of these sayings is that because they are so well known and widely spoken that we can assume that there is some truth to them, when in fact there is no truth in them, they are very harmful.
Both of these sayings send strong messages to children that they shouldn’t speak or that they are a cause of trouble which needs to be controlled. It is interesting that this energy is directed at kids as they are the ones with a fresh perspective in life and have the potential to shift us out of old comfortable patterns if allowed to express.
It’s interesting Fiona how we have repeated these sayings over, each generation, squashing children and making sure they will grow up less than their true selves, possibly repeating these saying themselves as adults to the next generation of children, and on it goes, until in time with awareness of the truth in words things will change.
Very true and great exposing this Rebecca, saying something long enough can make us start to believe it is true. As a little boy being told “boy’s don’t cry” the first time it is said everything in that precious boy knows it is not true, but over time and without expressing it is not okay, we take it on and not before long, that boy is then saying that to his son and so on and so on.
Even worse, there’s a song called ‘Boys don’t cry’, maybe not so popular now, but it certainly was when I was growing up. The power musicians have with their lyrics is immense, it’s a shame more consideration isn’t given to the messages they are sending, particularly to the younger generation, their target audience.
So many sayings that I too can recall – none of which offer truth. Now I can clock this – thankyou Jane – I can call them out. especially when around children. How sad that you worried that your heart was never going to be as warm as your Gran’s – and yet we can hold these seemingly unimportant words into our adult years. Feeling what our body wants is the key – not ride roughshod over it.
There are so many harmful sayings and one that springs to mind is ‘no pain, no gain’ in relation to exercising and by definition it means it you’re not hurting, you won’t get results. This is the opposite of the truth which is to exercise to how your body feels and not until it hurts.
That’s another good one to consider Sandra! It’s interesting how we give authority to sayings just through their commonality, as if repetition lends something to the truth..
Sandra what a great book a book of sayings and their interpretations would make. Such as “no pain, no gain” exposing, “it is okay to push and harm the body as long as you get the desired outcome at the end” If we really knew what we were saying yes to I wonder if we would continue to say yes.
‘No pain no gain’, such a common saying in relation to excercise Sandra, that only serves to push and drive our bodies way over its limit…so essential the ‘no pain, no gain’ is an abuse on our gentle and tender bodies.
Pain is the only way our body can let us know we’ve pushed it too hard during exercise, so this saying makes no sense as it says ‘I need to hurt my body to get physical results that I’ll be happy with’ – it’s crazy.
Yes absolutely Sandra – ‘no pain, no gain’ is the motivator for many athletes and gym users, as they have been led to believe that without pushing their body to it’s absolute limits (to the point where it hurts), they will not achieve anything or accomplish ‘success’ in their workouts. Exercise can be used as a distraction and for some this saying and belief is a great ‘excuse’ or reason to spend hours and hours at the gym instead of building relationships or looking at how they are living.
Susie it’s very much based on getting physical results to shape the body or look a certain way so the ‘no pain no gain’ is saying ‘no matter what keep pushing your body so you get the physical results you want’. It is a loveless saying and encourages people to override what their body is telling them ie. pain means you’ve gone too far!
‘no pain, no gain’ is a big one that is used by so many of us as a justification, its almost like it comforts us to feel like the pain was all worth it for the “gain”, not true at all but very much embedded into societies fabric.
This is definitely one saying that is incredibly damaging to the body, and it continues to amaze me that the majority of humanity take it to be true and live by it. Whatever happened to common sense when it comes to our precious bodies?
A similar one is “Go hard or go home” – championed particularly in running or triathlons. As a woman I have spent a decade removing hardness from my body, this saying is the antithesis of what it is to truly live as a woman.
Another example of where self worth possibly plays a part…
Heather I had a little giggle for as you read it differently it becomes a truth: when we see home as who we truly are. There is either hardness or who we truly are 😉 No matter how much we bastardise things, the truth will find a way to show its face.
The more I consider this saying ‘no pain, no gain’, the more I realise just how horrendously harmful it is. It essentially says to not listen to our own body, but to allow the mind to use motivation, thoughts, rewards, basically anything to get through. I’ve heard horror stories of people throwing up during exercise training sessions because they pushed themselves so hard, or the day after exercising, can hardly walk.
Children need to hear us call out what is not true, what is rubbish, just like the sayings that lead us away from the truth, as to have what they can already feel be confirmed is very supportive.
Yes, It’s interesting how we all grew up with a variety of different sayings and the truth is they take up away from what is actually true! Funny thing is we all know they are lies, like the cold hands, warm heart saying, although we know this is not true we agree to go along with the lie, then we something strange begins to happen, we start to subtly believe it. But this does not just happen with sayings, there are so many things about life we know is not true but we agree to go along with it because everyone else is and we want to fit in, so we all play a big role in the illusion we all currently live in.
Its a bit like superstitions, we go along with them just in case, giving our power away completely to a few words without dismantling them to see if any truth resides within them. They feel to me like a curse rather than a support.
What this article also got me thinking about was the fact that we can interpret these old sayings in lots of different ways. I always read ‘When the going gets tough, the tough get going’ as get out when things start to get a bit tricky i.e. give up. The fact that there are all these possibilities feels very confusing. The sayings written by Serge Benhayon are totally different. They offer layers of understanding and depth rather than multiple side tracks.
Interesting that there obviously can be different interpretations. Most of the sayings I have always had a hard time understanding and have needed explanations of what they mean and if I ever wanted to use one I would most likely mix them up.
reading your comment Matilda made me realise how we are told these saying ins school as a matter of fact. No-one ever stops to wonder what it is we are actually being told. It seem we tend to take what is old(er) as truth as we do with religion, culture etc. How different would it be if we were learned to discern and feel from our bodies what exactly we are communicating overtime we speak or write?
Jane, what an absolutely gorgeous blog. It’s true that so many sayings we grew up with can shape the way that we think and live. It is good to expose them for what they are, or at least take a good look at them so we can discern for ourselves how they actually feel and choose whether we want to live by them or not.
We know these sayings are all rubbish, ‘eat your crusts or your hair won’t be curly’, but as a young adult I know I used to think old wives tales had an element of truth in them. It feels interesting how I had hung onto them without realising it because they came from my parents. Reading the sayings from ‘The Sayings’ book of Serge Benhayon, there’s no comparison of depth at all, I can feel these sayings have absolute truth.
Thank you Jane for exposing how unsupportive and deeply harming most sayings are, to me it feels like they are shorthand for not wanting to really engage in communication and speak the truth so we fall back on trite words that appear harmless but in fact deliver a lot not just in what they say but in what they are avoiding exposing.
Very true Helen, these sayings do foster something that is deeply harming. They definitely expose how we are not engaging in communication and speaking the truth. They do appear harmless and allowing for true expression.
All of the books written by Serge Benhayon bring back the fundamental meanings of words.
Indeed Shami, through his lived understanding, Serge Benhayon breathes forth the infinite potential of words; their ability to confirm and evolve us.
I love this, Lucindag “..Serge Benhayon breathes forth the infinite potential of words; their ability to confirm and evolve us.”
Beautiful Lucindag and worth a repeat: through his lived understanding, Serge Benhayon breathes forth the infinite potential of words; their ability to confirm and evolve us.
Absolutely Shami, each word in Serge Benhayon’s books is used to their full energetic meaning so it resonates deep within our bodies and reconfigures our movements and way of being.
It is a living art Lucindag I agree, the way Serge Benhayon uses words to continually confirm and deliver evolution because he truly values their energetic quality and the effect they have on us. If we could see the energetic configuration of every word we spoke, then our whole relationship would alter with what we say and the sayings we are so used to reiterating without truly stopping to feel what we really mean when we say them. This is such a great blog to support us to stop and ponder on what we truly mean and honour ourselves by choosing our words with care so that they express what we truly mean to say.
Absolutely Shami, each word very deliberately used in its true energetic meaning to offer the reader evolution and love.
And that is what evolutionary sayings offer, a reminder of who we are so we can once again connect to our essence and live from here or an exposure of everything we have created that is not from our essence so we can recognise and renounce it.
In Holland we have this saying that goes something like this: Just act normal, then you are already grazy enough. In other words, don’t stand out, don’t be different and do like everybody else. This is a very strong Dutch saying. There is no truth in it at all, as it leaves us in comfort and does not invite us to be all of who we are.
Very interesting Mariette. In society there are many sayings, beliefs, rules and expectations that work together to create a strong sense of dis-empowerment within the community, and you’ve given a great example of how we are influenced to not be ourselves.
I agree that many of these ‘sayings’ are asking us to buy into an illusion that we all then have to live with.
Yes, it makes us live in an illusion and somebody has to make the choice to step out of it and start living from truth. Serge Benhayon is a wonderful example of that, a true role model and inspiration for many.
The problem is we don’t know it is an illusion, we think it is the way normal life is.
Mariette, this is an interesting one and do capping of ones development. We in Australia have a saying ‘She’ll be right mate’ and a general lass faire attitude towards life. That it is normal for us to be laid back, the stereotype of what it means to be Australian. So she’ll be right mate is used if people are starting to take action or stress about something. But layered in the consciousness of how and what it means to be a Aussie, which is just fostering a lack of responsibility.
Yes, it sounds similar and has indeed to do with a lack of responsibility. It is like these sayings tell us that we can just live a comfortable life where as we need to take responsibility for our impact and the choices we make.
Thank you for sharing Jane, it is amazing how subtle yet ingrained sayings can be and how subconsciously they can limit our expression and our choices.
Agreed James, it is the subtlety that often blindsides us from seeing the truth, yet when we feel into it it becomes quite evident that most sayings do limit how we behave, choose, express and see ourselves.
We only need a word or 2 to not be truth to divert us away from it and slowly but surely we have lost all sight of it. Truth is truth 100%, anything less is not truth.
What a great study this would make James, how different sayings impact on our health and well-being. One of my pet hates is the saying “drink cement and toughen up”, it is used in the armed forces and police department. The most sweetest and caring of men and women, telling themselves and each other to harden up, to not care, and to not feel what is going on around them. End result out of control suicide rates and Post Traumatic disorders. Clearly a saying and a mentality that does not work.
I have never heard that saying but catch myself quite a lot with thoughts of other ones. Usually they are dismissive of a person or a situation. The more I start to see them the more of them I see and the effects they have on the way we live our lifes.
Thank you Jane for this subject and gosh thinking about it there are heaps of sayings that get you nowhere and are not supporting us in any way. The one that came to mind for me was during my overworking days with zero regard for my body. Me and my mates would say “work hard, play hard”. So what that meant was get drunk go out and party until the early hours, do not give a hoot about work the next day, just know that you deserve to trash your body as you check out, numb out and do stuff you know you will regret.
So if we want to get real – this is utter nonsense and my body copped the poison. Not just alcohol but the lack of sleep and the ‘collateral damage’ and by that I mean my productivity the next day and the overeating to not admit and feel how much this was hurting me.
It makes me think Bina how many of the sayings many of us live by are actually excuses to be able to self-abuse and get away with it!
Great example Bina. It is incredibly exposing that we use sayings like this to champion abuse towards ourselves and others.
Brilliant example Bina, it really exposes how twisted these sayings are, for why should working hard require a reward? This is much how we live today, pushing through with little regard for ourselves and using the weekends, the holidays, the benders as a escapism from the empty function that we have accepted work to be.
Jane I remember a good few years ago now when I was new to the work of Serge Benhayon, I was reading one of his purple books called “A Treaties on Consciousness” whilst sitting alone in a cafe, as I read the sun came beaming through the windows and I suddenly felt my body go into motion as I heard my mother saying “make the most of the sun whilst it’s out” – low and behold right before me was the most perfect example of consciousness, for I had always felt I had to go out and be in the sun when it was out, this way of being was deeply entrenched into my body, so much so that it roused as soon as the sun came through the windows – as I felt into this I realised that this was not me at all, that truly I just wanted to be here, stay still and carry on reading – I have never forgotten this moment for it was such a perfect marker for me of how deeply we can be aligned to external consciousness, so much so we are willing to override our own natural flow.
From reading what you have shared Lucindag and also Jane in her mum saying ‘Out you go and don’t waste your day’ reminded me of growing up and constantly being asked what are you going do to with your day today. I can feel now that this felt like a pressure in that I always had to be doing something instead of just allowing myself be.
This consciousness has held me too for most of my life – whenever the sun comes out I have this intense, restless feeling which I can trace back to be told to go out and make the most of my day. Interestingly, I became aware of it a few years ago, and although less in intensity, I do sometime still feel anxiousness if I’m inside on a beautiful day. Shows how strong these beliefs can be, but also exposing for me as I can feel I am the one responsible for not letting it go completely. My choice now.
What a amazing example lucindag of exactly how consciousness can come in when recalling these sayings. There are many that come to mind that I have been entrenched in, ‘go and play trains with your boot laces’, that was one my mother used to say for us as kids to go and amuse ourselves, and one that Jane called out, ‘familiarity breeds contempt’. This one did stick with me for a lot of my life. These as you say as very powerful in understanding how we can align to an external consciousness, then when having awareness of it, to make other choices to not override our own wisdom.
When I was growing up, many years ago now, there was avery common saying at the time that “Children should be seen and not heard” and one my mother stressed when ever we were expecting visitors or going out anywhere was” Don’t speak until you are spoken to” another was “Don’t say anything unless you have something nice to say” all intended to shut down the truly open honest and joyful expression of children.
And could sayings be having a negative impact on our lives and the choices we are making? Could they actually provide us with an excuse to remain comfortable with the status quo, fit in with others, avoid intimacy and thus give us an excuse not to shine? True Jane I recognise in conversation these kind of saying are used to avoid going deeper in ourselves to feel how we are actually are living and do confirm us everything is okay as it is, they seem to be innocent but are definitely not,
Agreed Annelies and Jane. There is such a surface feel to these sayings as we just say them unconsciously much of the time, they feel like ‘fillers in’ of the precious time and space around us, robotic responses to keep us from connecting to, and expressing from, a true intimacy and depth with each other.
True Jeanette, sometimes I hear myself say something or nodding when someone else is using a saying. It feels as a trap I have fallen into.
It is so true Jeanette the automatic pilot is a dangerous way to live as it isn’t true there is always someone driving the vehicle.
It is amazing how comfortable we feel with these sayings when they come up in conversation. Even though we may realise they are not true, they seem to create a feeling of commonality through our shared familiarity with the saying that gives us a false sense of connection. Its almost like having the same football team, where you get to feel something in common with another person even though you appear to have little else in common. It allows us to agree on a surface level, to feel safe and comfortable and not go any deeper with each other.
So true – these sayings are embedded and championed in our culture.
Agreed Annelies sayings offer us no opportunity to truly feel and take responsibility for our choices, or as you share go deeper in exploring how we are truly living. There is much more going on here than we have given credit, and as you say sayings are not the innocent throw away comment they are often used as. A great thing to be aware of.
Some of the common sayings that have been used by humanity for such a long time seem to not to always represent the truth , it is for all of us individually to feel in our selves what is the right course of action .It funny how these sayings can lace or taint our ability to make the right choices from our bodies rather than our mind repeating the rhetoric of old saying heard many times.Thanks Jane for your interesting expose on this topic .
Greg080 I just wanted to add my head nodding in agreeance with your comment, that is most of those cliches, sayings etc. were just like a parrot repeating what it has heard and for we as people of a humanity to continue without feeling the energy of the content of these sayings makes one wonder at our own intelligence. I can agree with your suggestion that these sayings that I found were repeated ad nauseum during my early years were as you say ‘…not to always represent the truth…’ and with the wisdom of our developing awareness in all things of our human experience I find this to be quite profound, as we are continually discovering that much of our learning via society, family life, past education etc. etc. could be seen as nothing short of a bunch of lies and untruths. Is it really any wonder that ithere appears to be so many lost people wandering our planet earth not knowing which side is up. It seems to me that the presentations of Universal Medicine via the wise sage Serge Benhayon has much to offer when the value of looking within ourselves is where it is presented that we will find all of true value and wise counsel.
Well exposed Roberta that so often we don’t know what way is up through the perpetuation of lies and untruths that these sayings bring through constant repetition handed down through family members through the ages and then we normalise them and cannot see past them. A programming of the way we think?
I’ve often pondered on the mistruths of these common sayings. They have been around for so long that they get reeled off the tongue without a thought as to what they really mean. But once our awareness expands to start to question their meaning and quality, we realise we have been aligning to sayings which only serve to entrench us more deeply into our comfort and separation from others. For me now it is a red flag if I hear myself roll out one of these phrases – I stop and feel what it is I am saying or thinking, and this then exposes where I am not wanting to take responsibility.
Agreed Lucy, I often start saying some of these common phrases then stop as I can feel how untrue they are. I feel now more than I ever did that there is a responsibility in the words I choose to speak and that using a known saying is often a lesser form of expressing what it is I actually want to say and what represents how I really feel.
As a kid when I heard common sayings I would ask a lot of questions, some offered a simplicity and could be easily understood and some just never quite made sense.
Beautifully said Lucy – reading this blog has allowed me to ponder more deeply into the ‘Sayings’ and become more aware of different ‘Sayings’ that hold a manipulative quality. It is time we stopped and took more responsibility to feel and discern the words we use and their impact on ourselves and others.
Great comment Lucy, I too feel the same when I hear these sayings. But your great point is to stop and feel what it is you are saying or thinking, as it can be a true indicator for where one is not taking responsibility.
I have not really stopped to consider the deeper meaning of many of the common sayings we use but now that my awareness has been aroused I will certainly be stopping to feel the essence of what I am thinking and saying and whether I am choosing comfort over an opportunity to go deeper and be more intimate in my expression.
Great comment Greg – ‘these sayings can lace or taint our ability to make the right choices from our bodies rather than our mind repeating the rhetoric of an old saying heard many times.’ – very powerfully said and so true. This exposes the sinister quality that many of the sayings have and play out in our society today by keeping us caught up in momentums that are driven from our minds. A momentum that keeps us from feeling the quality of our truth and as such we give our power away to words that hold no true meaning in expressing all that we are.
Jane what a great expose of the embedded harm in many of today’s sayings indeed these short & compact comments are considered to be filled with wisdom and guidance – yet as you say if we begin to undress them, the route of a so called harmless saying that gets flippantly thrown into our daily dialogue can in truth be cementing an entirely involutionary way of being.
Thankfully Serge Benhayon has reimprinted sayings in his book Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy “The Sayings” . The sayings that you describe above are absolutely there to mislead us and to cause doubt as they did for you as a child.
What I love about this article is that it wakes me up to all the times I hear or repeat a ‘saying’ without being aware of it or of its impact and meaning. As you say, Jane, there are many of them around and when we simply re-gurgitate and abide by them we are living blindly. Actually this article then offers me the opportunity to look at any area of my life that I am on auto-pilot rather than fully alert. Thank you.
What you are sharing here is how much baggage comes with these sayings and I am hearing that we need to challenge these and feel what is right for is and have we been carrying some that are not true.
There is a responsibility that comes with every word and movement we make and this blog has brought more attention to this, I have reflected on the different sayings that are thrown around with out consideration of what the person considering what they are really saying. Thanks Jane for bringing more consciousness to what is being said when ‘Sayings’ are used and the opportunity to challenge the superficial exchanges we can all get involved in.
Jane I have had a saying come into my head a lot recently and I have found it useful. ‘A stitch in time saves nine’, this appears when I am about to cut a corner, which will inevitably lead to more work further down the track. I shall however ponder more deeply on its true energetic origin, as it can only come from one of 2 sources, truth or non truth.
What I have felt in the last day about sayings is that even though they can be technically ‘correct’, they can also have a rather flat or hollow quality about them; whereas sayings that are borne out of truth feel like thay are alive and they seem to have the ability to reconfigure something in us. Could it be that words have the ability to call our particles home?
Thanks Jane for writing this. It exposes how untrue many sayings are and how they can affect us negatively if we do not discern if they are true. The ill really lies in the fact that many people are using them so we tend to not discern and just take it on without realising the impact of that.
Truth lies at the heart of the matter, and when truth is sought without the smart arse remarks that hold absolutely no love, then we are seeking reconnection to our equal brothers.
Thanks for sharing this Jane. When you truly look at the sayings, its clear to see what’s behind them. the “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” is an insidious one as it lets us stay in our abusive patterns within relationships… don’t work and look at the quality if its not broken.
Jane I so could relate to your sharing in your blog about ‘old’ sayings – and I can say our ears as children were the recipients of many as we were growing up. It seemed that everything that we did, said or thought was always accompanied with some cliche, comment or critique that was supposed to explain away our various behaviours. One such comment that I remember in relation to children prattling on in a state of whimsy was “empty vessels make the most sound”, and as we grew it seemed to relate to all and sundry including all those who made any attempt to communicate using words. Indeed, interesting to look back on with the wisdom of an awareness of re-connecting to our inner and divine communicator.
One of the greatest delusions we can suffer from is to see the things we say as just a collection of letters, like a load of scrabble tiles on the board of life, we can use to get an awesome score. The truth is each sentence carries with it an energy that is super powerful and greatly affects the way we and others live. Your words Jane remind me to bring truth to every word I share today, knowing that just because it is familiar or what I am used to, does not mean that it is true.
Repeating static sayings such as these asks us to go into familiar patterns of behaviour rather than saying “I am here to evolve, what is it that I need to communicate to bring a situation to light?”
great blog Jane. Sayings like “When the going gets tough, the tough get going.” limit and cap a persons expansion and growth. A person may be in a situation because it is there for them to go to inner wisdom and action, or communicate something from within, but we have learnt these sayings that apply to life and stop us from accessing that place of openness within ourselves.
Thank-you for this post Jane, and bringing to my attention the harm these old sayings can deliver when we accept them allowing them to become so entrenched from such an early age. It’s true that Serge Benhayons book Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy “The Sayings” holds a wealth of wisdom to ponder and reflect on always opens me to a deeper level of understanding myself and others. As I have found all his books to do.
Same Deidre. It brings something more each time they are read too.
Awesome blog Jane, highlighting how important it is to discern everything we receive be it sayings or any kind of expression. Just because something is commonly accepted doesn’t mean it is of truth or evolving. We have the ability to discern for ourselves what is true and what is not. Taking a moment to trust our feelings and discern the energy behind what is expressed is a responsibility we can choose to take that is very much needed to support ourselves and others.
Thank you Jane I loved this blog and can relate to what you have shared, as I look back on my life I can feel how much the saying of my day influenced my life keeping my down, blocking my light. I now enjoy each day reading Serge’s books of true sayings, sayings that enlighten, encourage, and guide me on my path of evolution.
Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy ‘The Sayings’ book by Serge Benhayon are a companion for life!
Timely blog Jane! For quite a while now I have felt the emptiness in ‘sayings’ and how I have used them in the past as a flippant response to aspects of life that require much more consideration and responsibility. These ‘throw away’ sayings and those found in the Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy ‘The Sayings’ book by Serge Benhayon illustrate are vastly different and have a profound resonance about them that is deeply supportive in of my life.
I love what you have opened up here Jane, it’s true we all grow up with certain sayings that often become embedded as part of our inner dialogue, without our really taking the time to feel into what in truth they’re saying, and yet we continue on allowing them to run. It’s true ‘expression is everything’ therefore choosing to be aware of the lines we use out of habit is well worth dismantling.
Agreed Giselle. choosing to be aware and looking into what’s behind them can debunk so much.
Jane, thank you! This is a brilliant expose of many phrases that can be commonly repeated without really thinking about what is actually being said and the impact they have. And I agree with you – Serge Benhayon’s book of Philosophical sayings feel true to every cell in my body!
Your blog reminded me of a saying which is used in a way that’s supposed to sound like it’s supporting us when we’re upset when in fact it’s encouraging us to hold it all in – and that’s the simple, but very suppressing, ‘Don’t cry’. Like it’s a bad thing to express your emotions, release hurt and pain. A great blog, Jane for raising the bar in discerning what’s really behind many of our customary, every day sayings.
Beautiful Jane. I hadn’t considered before that sayings that are part of our everyday language can indeed stunt us in our expression, so your blog has led to a deep pondering on this. Every expression, every word written is either involuting or evoluting which leads to the question – how are we expressing in every moment and which path are we choosing?
Your comment and this blog brings to my attention the importance of taking responsibility, to discern what we receive and what we express to others. Great question as it asks us to be more aware of what we are contributing to when we express, as this impacts on all of us if it is evolving or not.
This is great Jane! I too have grown up with sayings that these days make my skin crawl. One that I used to be particularly fond of because it encapsulated me to a tea was ‘ What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger’. For years I lived by this motto. It allowed me to harden up, to avoid feeling anything so I could get through the struggle of life, push myself through anything because it meant I would be setting myself up for an independant future. Boy did that not work! These days when I hear it, I shudder because I know that it’s not truth…a few years ago I changed the saying to ‘what doesn’t kill us, makes us harder’…in other words, when we live in struggle and push ourselves to the limit, all we do is develop more contracted bodies that are empty and most certainly not joyful.
This is a great way of breaking the hold certain sayings or thoughts have over us. ‘Re-writing’ them takes their ‘hook’ out and puts us back in the driving seat.
I’m familiar with and grew up with these sayings as well Jane and they do nothing but encourage a hardness in and disconnection to our bodies. It’s interesting that we can adopt these as little mantras without considering the impact they’re having.
Thank you Jane for writing this blog, I never actually stood really still to ponder on the many sayings, that seemingly fit in so ‘well’ and are so normal (accepted). But to stand, and truly feel what they mean. We can see that many of those sayings have been used, whilst not truly pondered upon if its true. Just in familiarity it is taken over from generation, as this example shows. So it is beautiful to came back to the reality of what is being said, and feel what it truly means.
It just goes to show the level of responsibility we have in all that we say, think and do. Many people would say oh it’s just a saying, no big deal, old wives tale – but it is actually far more harming than many want to feel or admit. We are being asked to stop and consider how the words we use and what we say leaves an energetic imprint behind. Either one that leaves a person to be free, a la Serge Benhayon and the Ancient Wisdom, or ones that confines us – like many of the sayings shared or even some of the things you see in new age books or affirmations etc.
A very powerful blog Jane – offering much to open up awareness to the causal turn of phrases we may use – just because that’s the way we have been doing things. But it is so true using words casually can possibly be stunting us all, we cover off a need on the surface but miss the detail that can offer evolution. Is it evolution we are avoiding?
We have created many throw away sayings deliberately to abuse ourselves and / or others, and take us away from truth. Often encouraging us to override everything we feel. If you think about the ones mentioned they are all evil in it’s truest sense – anything that keeps us separate from our Soul – you can see more on the true meaning of evil here- http://www.unimedliving.com/unimedpedia/word-index/unimedpedia-evil.html
This exposes the lack of true expression that is used in society today, those examples feel so empty, not confirming who we are in truth but keeping us small and leave us seperate. It is great that this gets exposed and see that there is a different way to look at life and read truth like in the book you describe.
Wow, Jane these sayings can rattle around in our head from hearing them over and over as a child.
As you say it is easy to see how they are empty and can stunt our communication. Great blog, thank you for the awareness to be more responsible for my expression.
Jane this is a great article, there are so many of these harmful sayings, one saying I hear a lot is ‘a little bit won’t hurt you’, this can often refer to alcohol, sweets, chocolate etc and I have noticed that this saying is used to comfort people when someone knows that really whatever they are deliberating on having is not good for them, it feels like we persuade them to have it, maybe to make ourselves feel better about whatever we are having that we know is not good for us.
‘A little bit won’t hurt you’… this saying ties in with lots of others: ‘anything in moderation’, ‘a little of what you fancy’… and like you say, Rebecca, they feel like they are giving ourselves and each other permission to do or consume things that we know are harmful. This is one of the madnesses of human intelligence: doing things we know harm us.
Great saying to shine the spot light on Rebecca, just saying it i can feel the insipid nudge to be irresponsible.
Some of the sayings i grew up with seem like gap fillers a bit like the use of swear words they can stop us from taking the time to connect with how we are feeling and finding the words to share that. Which i have learnt is a healing in itself.
Great blog Jane! It is interesting how ‘catchy’ those one line sayings are, as they have a have a way of sounding, that makes it easily repeatable, and easy to not give attention to its meaning… and hence, erroneously leading you in the opposite direction to truth.
Could it also be said johannebrown17, that these sayings have been around for so long that we find ourselves using them as a habitual response without giving thought or taking a moment to feel their true meaning, thus avoiding the truth and keeping us going around and around in the groove of our own making.
Yes Johanne, but the thing that makes it catchy is the ‘need’ for comfort really. So once we choose to let go of the comforts, there is no need to read or attempt to any say of these lies(sayings).
Spot on Danna. so true. when we are out of the comfort, there is no need to express someone else’s words that in turn make us less.
Exactly Emily, this proves to us that we have the power to make change happen. And not someone else to do it for us.
I agree, this blog has prompted me to be more aware of why these sayings are so commonly used and how they can affect our choices. It is also interesting how certain sayings I thought were pretty harmless can actually be harmful in ways I never had considered before. I realise as I take responsibility to be more aware and to discern what energy or intention is behind any form of expression received and expressed, then I can no longer be ignorant or avoid truth.
Those words quoted in this blog from Serge Benhayon on energetic responsibility say it all really. We do have a responsibility and I have seen first hand how even the quality of our thoughts can lead to life’s difficulties. Take for example if we have negative and untrusting thoughts of others, eventually we will create a situation that just affirms this, whereas we would do well to investigate where those thoughts are coming from and why they are there before we take them as gospel.
So there are sayings that confirm truth and sayings that perpetuate lies.
And so it is our responsibility to build a foundation from which we are able to discern which is truth.
Spot on Tamara, we can either smile and agree blindly to the saying, or we can take a moment to feel what is actually being delivered and what we are taking on board or agreeing to and with. The moment we say yes to something without feeling it, it will begin to affect us instantly. We have the capacity to feel and say if something does not sit right with us – this is a blessing that we sometimes forget to tap into.
Thank you Jane for allowing a stop moment of reflection on all these proverbs and sayings. It is true what you are sharing that they are incredibly capping…they insidiously creep in and affect choices of behaviour that go against our true way of being.
“Could it be that most sayings actually can stunt our communication and are used when we are unwilling to go deeper with our expression?” – Ahh Jane, I think you have well and truly “hit the nail on the head” here!!! All jokes aside, there is such truth in what you have shared in this article and I really appreciate the opportunity to bring more consideration and awareness to those “turns of phrase” or sayings that so easily slip off the tongue without us actually connecting in full to what we are expressing.
Yeah it’s great to be given the opportunity to consider more deeply the every day banter we run with often without thinking or feeling what it is we are actually saying. Throw away comments actually do create more harm than good no matter how much we say we ‘didn’t mean it’. If we don’t mean something, then why do we say it?
Absolutely agree Hannah, i am stopped in my tracks because i see how i have simply repeated what was said to me but without ever truly discerning what i was promoting or aligning to…..”for one will see exactly how we can harm or heal in all that we do, say and think.”
Well said Lucinda, it is quite heavy to feel how we are simply repeating what others have been living. Basically a lesser version of who we are. That clearly shows how we live by reflection and that we are missing out on true role models that show what it truly means to live as a human being.
I agree Hannah, Jane’s blog brings to all such a great opportunity to open up our awareness to ‘truly consider the energy behind our words before we speak’.
True Tamara, I have found that it all comes back to connection – for if we are connected with ourselves, the quality in which we speak and the words which we choose to express is totally different – even if we do use a popular saying, the way in which it is expressed can totally change.
And, Hannah, I would say it goes for all that we talk about each and every day – how many other words slip off our tongues without connection and awareness? in every moment we can make every move and word count for the blessing that they can bring – now this is pretty cool, and can “be a game changer”…;)
Super cool Henrietta 😉
Love your article Jane! Sayings abound around us all the time and it is so true that they can certainly be misleading. In many cases I am guessing that there was some truth originally, but that this truth has then been bastardised so much that it no longer carries the true essence of what could have been a very supportive and healing saying. And so, as you have said, we are indeed blessed to be re-discovering some sayings that are actually there to support us in so many ways, such as those sayings that have been delivered so far by Serge Benhayon.
and some of them don’t make sense and have another saying that contradicts them. ‘More haste, less speed’ and ‘Don’t be hasty’. Deep within these 2 I can feel there is a kernel of understanding that if we are being hasty or speedy, we have left our stillness behind, but this is no longer conveyed or understood. Such bastardisations of truth are a reflection to us all of the way we have all bastardised truth in our own lives and choice. We would not have such separative and destructive sayings if this wasn’t so.
Spot on Lucy – even the truest saying if delivered by a person who does not live what they say, will carry very little healing or support to those hearing it. The trick is that people will be drawn in by the words, but they will not allow themselves to feel how empty they are because of the lack of livingness from the person who wrote it. So as ‘they say’ – ” walk your talk ” – ha ha, now this is a real test to see if I too walk my talk and a real test too of sayings and their place in society. How misleading or distracting sayings can be when we are not careful about them.
Jane, a great article exposing the enegetic quality of sayings, those that come from truth and those that do not come from truth. So many of the sayings that we say automatically come from untruth. They tend to come out of people’s mouths quite automatically and with little or no thought. They often accompany behaviour and patterns of thinking that also seem to come out of an automated way of being. Whereas the sayings from the books by Serge Benhayon have a freshness to them that causes our bodies to sit up rather than lay down.
Well said Alexis – as children we grow up like sponges absorbing everything around us, unfortunately, not all of it is truth and then we spend a lot of time sifting out the ‘what is not’.
“If you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em” – I find that this saying and idea can be quite poisonous. I recently had a conversation with someone about what they wanted to do/accomplish when they are older, to which they replied that they don’t really care – earn money, have a comfortable life and retire as young as possible. To this I asked them if they had thought about doing anything that might make a difference to someone’s life, as I have known this person for a long time and am aware that they do care a lot about people, but their response was that the world is so corrupt that a single person can never make a difference, therefore you may as well join in what everyone else is doing (and join the corruption yourself). This highlights a serious problem in our society – we belittle our worth, believe our actions do not make a difference, avoid the responsibility of causing change and en-join what we know to be false and wrong.
Great point you make Susie – It becomes a convenient excuse to not take responsibility when we enjoin what we know to be false and wrong. This is still a choice – and it is a choice many are making in our society. And this will be a gradual change that we all make when we are ready to do so. Once we step up in responsibility, then this too will be reflected onto others to inspire them to do likewise.
Great sharing Susie. This is the quality we grow up with, already given up and subscribing to the comfort of corruption and just joining, blaming others and playing small. Lots of proverbs are implying to comfort to what is there and to not walk out of the box, but it is our individual responsibility to not subscribe to it and embrace our true grandness. Thank God for Universal Medicine and all the true role models, like you Susie, that are around showing that there is another way.
On reading your comment Susie the first thing that sprang into my mind was the quote from the Dalai Lama, ‘If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.’ We do belittle our worth, but if we think about individuals who made an inordinate difference to the world like Winston Churchill for example we really have a lot of power. Perhaps the, ‘well what can I do’ attitude is a form of giving up because it suits us to do so?
There is big difference from a quote like the one above from the Dalai Lama, which supports lightness, expansion, development and awareness to sayings/proverbs that encourage a stagnation and heaviness.
Absolutely Rachel – if we all took on the attitude of ‘I will never make a difference in the world’ then this may become true. However, our actions will still affect those around us, be it in a positive or a negative way.
I love this, yes there are sayings that support us to look deeper and become more aware of what is true.
It is true, we avoid the responsibility of causing change, because it can be that it is followed by a period of feeling uncomfortable and uneasy until the change or truth is clearly lived and the upcoming issues are dealt with.
Thats an important point you are making here Kerstin. We have this belief that change has to bring this immediate relief when in truth it is just the turning point of an old momentum and this old momentum is still acting out till we live the truth. And the wanting of relief is already coming from a false image of what life is about, there is nothing to be relieved of, there is only responsibility to be lived.
This is very common Susie – sadly. People believe that there efforts alone do not make a difference in the world and therefore give up on speaking up against corruption or abuse. But as Serge Benhayon has shown us, one person can impact and inspire many people to live a joyful life, and those people go on to inspire others to do the same…a single pebble in a pool ripples a long way.
great contribution Susie! “the world is so corrupt that a single person can never make a difference, therefore you may as well join in what everyone else is doing ” — this way of thinking is even flawed because we undoubtedly have an effect on people regardless.
Very revealing how sayings that have been thrown around for so long, keep us away from truth
Jane this is beautiful what you have shared especially the last part and it is very true in the ‘Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy ‘The Sayings’ book by Serge Benhayon’ is a book that delivers Truth and ‘asks us to consider that we are so much more than human beings using function as the way to get through life, and that we are living a long way from our true, natural way of being.’ Only the other day I had a similar thought you had about cold hands and warm heart in that if people had cold hands would they think they have a cold heart just because of a saying! It just goes to show, how you have said, that many sayings do not deliver truth.
I would agree Jane that a ‘saying’ can ‘stunt’ our communication and deeper expression. What I love about ‘Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy ‘The Sayings’ book by Serge Benhayon is it offers truth, the sayings invite us to expand our awareness, they are ever unfolding as we are, and they are confirming of our true nature.
What your sharing is really interesting – I too was brought up with lots of these little sayings, and its interesting to consider how they may have caused an impact on me.
Thanks Jane…there are so many throw away lines that stick into our psyche that deliver messages that steering us away from truth….
Beautifully said Joel – many expressions and sayings have been bastardised (some so subtly too) and they do end up steering us away from the truth if we so allow it. Also, I notice I have a habit sometimes of nodding and saying yes to another’s comments or sayings rather than actually sitting back and taking in what they are saying and really allowing myself to feel if this is true or not. I realise now it is time to give myself the space to feel it. Even today as I was queuing in a shop I was reading a bunch of sayings on the wall next to the counters, and many of them sounded light hearted and care-free but in reality were just inviting one to walk away from responsibility. It is easy for us to laugh and agree with such sayings when we seek lightheartedness but the problem is that we also agree to the darker side of the saying too, the side that does not support us in our fullness. We cannot say yes to one part of a lie and and no to another, they are a package deal. Truth is worth so much more than any diluted version of itself.
nice, Henrietta, I have also noticed there are times when I have said yes, before ever really feeling what is being said…it makes it harder to then feel what is going on, because I am then already in it…hard but not impossible
Henrietta I love what you have shared and have often felt myself kind of nodding and mumbling some kind of half hearted agreement to something someone is saying, whilst being aware on some level that both me and the other person are involved in a kind of wet wishy washy no mans land of expression. All of those moments add up and so at the end of the day I am the one deciding what I fill those moments with.
Spot on Alexis – and the thing is that when we smile and say yes, without really feeling what we are saying yes to, then this can come as a shock later on when we get the realisation that we did not allow ourselves to feel what was being said yes to. This is actually us ‘checking out’ of life, not wanting to be present and with another and I feel this often comes from a need to please another and not wanting them to feel uncomfortable, but also from us not wanting to take greater responsibility for our expression.
Agreed Henrietta, we’ve sold out big time.
Yes, it is a way of ‘selling out’ – giving up on what we know to be true for a semblance of the truth. But it is never too late to re-claim what we know to be of truth.
Henrietta, not only is it ‘never too late to re-claim what we know to be truth’ but we all have to do it one day if we are ever to leave this plane of life.
We have a long way to go yet, before we can fathom leaving behind this plane of life, and as each and every one of us steps away from the sell out, and claim ourselves again, we have the effect of ‘pulling along’ those along side us. It is something of a collective effort and team work, and a continuous inspiration. And as you have said, once each and every one of us has thus been inspired and chosen truth again, we can work even more powerfully together for what is needed.
Great sharing Henrietta, the nodding or convenient yes is like settling for less and accepting that someone or something just reduced us to human life without honoring our true divine grandness. When I do this I can feel how I get dense and often tired and its like I shut my body down to receive all that there is and I am left with this physicality that is disconnected from its source.
Spot on Rachel…It is like living alternate lives – we can choose to live from the natural source of who we are or we can choose to live from an outside source that takes its toll on our body and our mind. The outside source is the one that makes us more dense and shuts us down and disconnects us from the rest of the world, from each other and from our deepest connection with ourselves. And yet our natural source is one that impulses us endlessly and inspires us to care for ourselves and those around us with ever deepening quality.
Yes, Jane, so many of these sayings become ingrained into our systems and appear meaningless, but the harm they can do is insidious. As for going outdoors, like you, when it’s a lovely day, I feel I need to be out there in the fresh air, but sometimes it is also lovely to spend time at home, with the sunlight streaming through the windows and simply tidying my house, or my paperwork.
Well said Carmel the impositions through images are not our obvious choices its the movement they create in us that takes us off track. Its like they create a deviated and disharmonious movement and we are following a stream that is step by step deviating us from our true path, which is living by our body and its true movement.
This is a great blog Jane, thank you. One saying that I remember growing up was ‘lucky in cards, unlucky in love’ every card game I played I wanted to lose at, and whenever you won someone would say ‘no love for you’, seems insignificant but you can feel that there’s more behind the falsities that actually does affect us.
That’s a great example of how we are affected by those images that are build around us from a young age. We grow up learning to adjust to the box that we are offered and missing out on our true grandness. That the truth presented by Universal Medicine and expressed in every word by Serge Benhayon, we are already everything, we just have to live it.
Beautifully said Rachel and a powerful reminder of the fact that ‘we are already everything, we just have to live it’.
Rachel,I love how you have brought in the image of the box. On reading your comment about the fact that we are everything already, I got to feel how the normal touted sayings act like small boxes that sit over the top of expansion and act like false breaks.
We are so innocent and impressionable when we are young that we believe what the role models around us say. I too remember worrying that because my hands were warm I had a cold heart – and then when growing up when my circulation was not so great for a while, I was pleased because my hands were cold. Not once did it cross my mind that perhaps there was an underlying medical condition that might need attention, so not only did this saying influence my thinking, it also created an opening for self-disregard and irresponsibility.
The sayings from the Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy are priceless snippets of wisdom that need to be understood in both body and mind to be fully appreciated and are in total contrast to most of the sayings that we use in our daily language at the moment.
Thank you for exposing the truth behind these so called sayings Jane. I can feel the harm that these careless words inflict.
They are actually abuse.
And deliberately designed to lead us astray.
Agreed Gyl, a little like pouring liquid cement over the moment.
Now that is a great revelation Lee, making us accountable for our words. Imagine that, if we lived in a world where we were held to account for the way we spoke to others and the impact it has on them. What a wonderful world that would be, not before long we would be living harmoniously and lovingly. Using words to support not to harm.
Great subject to address Jane, a lot of sayings definitely cap us in so many ways. I love the way you dissect a few here and expose what they really mean. I’m not going to be so quick to use a saying again without first examining the true meaning or intent behind it.
As you pointed out Jane, those sayings are an excuse for things we initially know are not true. And further more they let an imprint which others can carry a long time before realising how much they have impacted their life.
Yes – there is no middle ground: we either heal or we harm I love the way you have juxtaposed common phrases, used when we don’t feel like expressing, with the inspirational and true words of Serge Benhayon, Jane. Placing the two together clearly indicates which is harming and which is healing!
I agree also, we know we are not living all that we could be, but so much of mankind is living in same kind of way or far worse, it appears normal to exist in this lesser life, but deep down we do know, and we are being called to be more of who we are. Serge’s books help to clear the way for us to heed that call.
Wow Jane, your readings and true understanding of these words are so exposing of how we can be deceived by rhyming phases that are actually entrenching the ill way we can think about something, rather than simply feeling the words and knowing for ourselves, thank you.
I love what you have written Jane. I too have found that reading the books is calling me always to a greater responsibility to hold that which I know to be true and to live this in every way, – exposing the untruth that is designed to keep me down and which I have willingly agreed to and taken on in the past, but now am in the process of discarding, allowing greater space in my very being to know who I truly am.
“Could it be that most sayings actually can stunt our communication and are used when we are unwilling to go deeper with our expression?” – essentially they are like sware/curse words – they glaze over the top of what we are feeling to avoid going deeper. The first one that came back to me from days gone by was “Because I can” – the arrogance in this saying feels thick and yuky and has been used over the years as an excuse for my own and others choices. What if we couldn’t do anything we like just because we can? or think and/or lie to ourselves and others that are choices are acceptable? Universal Medicine has taught that nothing is ever not noted and felt by all and what we do does affect the all. We are not living in our own personal bubble that lets us do whatever we like, whenever we want.
Agreed Brendan, it’s interesting to feel the consciousness underneath these sayings and what they are really conveying…
Thank you Jane for such a great blog on the sayings passed on from hurts as most are and one i always remembered from my father telling me I lived in dreams and” that don’t you know dreams will never come true.” This was hurtful but also came from hurt too. The books by Serge Benhayon espcially those on sayings offer absolute truth as you share and are very expansive deep and knowing of the all and leave one with a gift to take with one if we choose to and are heaven sent and beautiful to feel inside with their forever expansion offered.
You raise some great points here Jane, and it has me wondering if there are any saying which I repeat or believe to be true when in fact they are false and empty, along with sayings which are true. One which comes to mind is ‘More haste, less speed’ which it is reported to go back to the Greeks and Romans. Now we can all be more aware of the saying which have been banded around for centuries and discern if they are true or false.
Beautiful blog Jane and a great expose of how we can over ride what we are really feeling by reverting to commonly used sayings. How often do we over ride our exhaustion with the saying “When the going gets tough, the tough get going” or ignore how we are treating one another with “familiarity breeds contempt”? Enter Serge Benhayon, a man who takes great care of every word, every step, every breath ensuring that what is said is what is meant and that what is meant comes from love, thus empowering us all to truly re-claim the power we have over our expression and relationships.
‘Serge Benhayon, a man who takes great care of every word, every step, every breath ensuring that what is said is what is meant and that what is meant comes from love, thus empowering us all to truly re-claim the power we have over our expression and relationships.’ Beautifully expressed rowenakstewart and in his Sayings book we all have the opportunity to access this wisdom at any time and choose evolution.
Thanks Jane, you have highlighted the almost institutionalized usage of sayings we have just accepted as fact that keep us in the groove like a scale electric racecar when we try to be ourselves.
Love that analogy Steve for they are absolutely configured to keep us from being who we are… which we allow and promote each time we repeat them.
I agree Jane, the quality and purpose of both types of sayings differ: the colloquial sayings seem to offer an excuse to not need to take responsibility (remain comfortable with the status quo, fit in with others, avoid intimacy and thus give us an excuse not to shine) and the sayings written by Serge Benhayon remind us that we are more than life tries to convince us we are (!) That truth, in our essence we are all love, and we are held in the magnificence of God’s love always.
‘Popular sayings’ consecrate separatism in that they appear to be cultural expressions; statements that capture idiosyncrasies that are different from other ones. So, they reinforce an image of the world that fights the fact of universalism.
“Esoteric and Exoteric Philosophy ‘The Sayings’” by Serge Benhayon is the only set of sayings that exist that talk to our hearts. Although no one of them is part of the so-called ‘popular wisdom’ the wisdom that they offer is really profound.
When we make sayings part of our communication and our expressions we celebrate familiarity over truth.
Sayings offer us ‘a safe’ way to walk in life. We relate to them as part of our search of safety.
Well said Eduardo, safety and also a comfortable way of living… almost like a self-imposed rulebook.
What’s in a Saying? An image. Sayings are the kingdom of images.
‘As if you were reading my mind’ Jane 🙂 – Amazing sharing and one that I can so relate too from my childhood. Like many ‘cold hands, warm heart’ has been said so many times it just comes from my mouth without me actually feeling into what I am truly expressing. Not only am I repeating parrot fashion as those have done before me but, I feel that someone else has honed in on their own sensitivities, tenderness to of taken notice to of made that observation in the first place to express this to me. This is the first time I’ve ever been given a nudge to wake me up about this old habit – Thank you Jane greatly appreciated.
What we say does matter so there is a responsibility with the words we use and many of the sayings that are common do not hold truth in them but instead you can feel they have been used for convenience or to create a response to a situation that actually asked for more responsibility.
Thank you Jane. You show how we all have a responsibility for all that we do, say and think and how a careless expression can have a long lasting impact, particularly on a child who may hear so much more in the words. The saying of Serge Benhayon ‘Expression is Everything’ calls us all to act, speak and think from our inner-heart.
Wow, these sayings that you mention above are tough! So good that you stopped absorbing and started observing!
Words carry meaning. All words carry meaning and absolutely it is every one of our responsibility to be aware of this.
Spot on Johanna, and I would even go so far as saying that each letter matters and each punctuation mark too!?!!! 😉 – there are times when I finish a sentence with a full stop or not, or sign my name with a full stop after it. Everything matters.
Totally Jane, some sayings are their to make excuses and prevent open connection between people. Reading the ones you shared I can feel the evil in there intention and if we stop and really feel like you did, we can read every thing that is said. I’ve always felt the evil in the saying ‘blood is thicker than water’…implying that you put up and accept what ever disrespect, fighting, abuse etc. because it’s family. There are so many, and I love that your blog brings this awareness of how stifling they are.
I agree Aimee, I also feel the evil in those sayings Jane has mentioned and I was not aware how much sayings do tell lies. The total opposite of the sayings from Serge Benhayon which do express truth and as such are healing.
Yes Kerstin, once we are aware of what is the intention behind something it allows more space to see what else has slipped past our radars or we have not wanted to see the real evil of it. I love ‘the sayings’ book by Serge Benhayon, and I know when I open to a page that I’m going to be delivered truth and love, that like Jane I either squirm and feel a tension or are completely confirmed by how I’m feeling… well both ways is confirming and healing.
Magnificent sharing Jane. You have ‘hit the nail on the head’ (to use a saying) when you ask ‘Could they actually provide us with an excuse to remain comfortable with the status quo, fit in with others, avoid intimacy and thus give us an excuse not to shine?’
I agree Johanna, we really do just use these one liners to stay ‘in’ with the crowd and avoid a deeper more honest conversation.
The great example you shared of cold hands warm heart had me thinking the same and feeling the falseness in it whenever I heard this growing up.
Just now as I have read the beginning of your blog I have come to realise that some sayings are supportive while others just make untruths or living less of somewhat of an acceptable way of being. We tend to repeat sayings throughout generations without actually questioning them, their meaning or their truth. Which keeps many blind.
I remember growing up with a little song/ saying during our play time with the words ‘catch a nigger by the toe’. As a young child I did not question what I was saying but as I grew a little I was appalled that this existed and what it meant, and then changed it to ‘tigger by the toe’. These sayings without our discerning hold us back as a humanity from living the love we are. Thank you for writing this blog.
As I read your blog Jane I started to remember some of the sayings that I grew up with and realised now that as they were spoken by people I trusted, I felt they must be true. I used to look at these sayings as being wise and did not question the wisdom of them for a very long time, but these days I can feel, as you do, that “there is no truth in them”, they are just empty words passed on down through the generations without anyone – until now – questioning their wisdom. An awesome conversation to begin Jane. Thank you.
A great point, Jane. Looking at the old sayings that have been repeated and passed on from one generation to the next, and the way we are living currently – it is quite obvious that we have bought into something that does not honour who we truly are.
Absolutely Fumiyo, they also feel intentional in their design to misdirect us from the truth and to encourage disregarding feeling what is true for us in any moment as we just blindly follow what the saying says.
This is such an incredible blog. Thank you so much for choosing to express here Jane. For a long time now I have been pondering the often very awful origins of many common sayings such as ‘rule of thumb’ which was used to determine the thickness of the rod with which you could legally beat your wife etc… These sayings are not the harmless words we are led to believe they are.
The sayings brought through by Serge Benhayon always offer the receiver love and evolution and if we used these sayings in truth as much as we use the sayings that are not true the world would be a completely different and amazing place.
“If it looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then it probably is a duck” …. I’ve always quite liked this saying, whilst I do feel there is some truth here, it also feels quite judgmental, encouraging us to pigeon hole, to look at how things appear on the outside, as opposed to how they feel, energetically.
Ha ha – love it Alison! Spot on – this is a new take on sayings that really allows us to ponder on much. And yes I like ducks too, especially slow cooked ones!
That’s a strong one that wants us to belief in what we see and that it is what it appears to be. We can say this about human beings, that it looks like, walks, like talks like a human being, but it is first of all an equal Son of God and that it is not about what we appear to be here on earth, but who we truly are in our divine origin.
This says it all to me,”Through these heaven-sent words we are reminded that in our essence we are all love and we can all return home to love if we choose it. It reminds us that we are held in the magnificence of God’s love always.”
That line also stood out for me Irena, what a beautiful reminder to take into my day.
Could it be that ‘sayings’ ‘provide us with an excuse to remain comfortable with the status quo, fit in with others, avoid intimacy and thus give us an excuse not to shine?’, yes, absolutely. It feels as though they have been thought into existence to placate rather than to inspire.
Love this Alison… and couldn’t agree more…. they feel intentional in their way to keep us small and to not look for the truth as it is packaged in a way that is accepted by all as the norm… so how on earth could that be wrong! Hmmm.
Growing up, I was encouraged to ‘reach for the stars’, which, I can now understand, added to my feeling of ‘never being enough’ …. there was always more for me ‘to achieve’. Contrary to this saying, thanks to the teachings of Universal Medicine, I now love saying to young people how they are already all they need to be, it’s just about learning how to live ‘all that they already are’ in their day to day.
That’s so awesome Alison. It’s incredible how many phrases we actually use daily without noticing. The ‘reach for the stars’, really does seem innocent enough, and no doubt many would defend it as being encouraging, but you’re absolutely right underneath it, it’s saying, you can be better, try harder, rather than encouraging us to simply bring who we are and nothing more to the table.
“Could it be that most sayings actually can stunt our communication and are used when we are unwilling to go deeper with our expression?” Great question Jane . Could it be that these sayings may not offer us the space to truly feel for ourselves what is needed to be shared from our own inner wisdom? Its as if they keep us locked into an image of how things are, but not really offering us the opportunity to discover for ourselves what we truly feel. Fantastic blog Jane thank you.
Great point Kelly, it’s like they offer us to reduce ourselves to something less. Settling for a reducing proverb is like settling for not wanting to truly read life and look at what is truly going on. We just stick to an image and decide that this is enough. Such an insidious way to not live in our fullness.
Yes Rachel it doesn’t allow us to be who we are from what we know ourselves to be true, as we are not given the space to express from our being.
Love what you are sharing here, Jane, it allowed me to consider how many times I’ve repeated a ‘saying’, without first connecting to what it is that I am repeating to another person. I don’t believe that ‘cold hands, warm heart’ holds any truth at all, despite the fact that I too have cold hands! Yet, I’ve repeated this saying countless times, perpetuating the ‘lie’. Thank you for bringing my awareness to being more responsible with everything that I say, there’s no room to make a ‘mindless comment’, everything we say is either healing or harming, there is no comfortable ‘in between’.
Me too, Alison. I have delivered and repeated sayings and actions countless times without any discernment, just because they had been repeated before by many others. With more awareness, our responsibility rises.
‘Thank you for bringing my awareness to being more responsible with everything that I say, there’s no room to make a ‘mindless comment’, everything we say is either healing or harming, there is no comfortable ‘in between’.’ This is so true and I am more likely to correct myself now when I find that I come out with something totally inappropriate to the truth of who I am. This is due to my awareness and commitment to the truth. I often find supposed wise words in sayings that I have grown up with to be misleading and it is great when we can catch this dictate and instead consider how we feel and what is true for us in any moment.
Absolutely Alison. There are no words that don’t have an effect and that effect either heals or harms. This is a great reminder to me to be aware of what I am saying. It is not only those phrases but the everyday greetings and responses that are said without true care and connection.
So true Alison, and a great reminder for the responsibility we hold in all of our expression.. there is no neutral, what we say ‘is either healing or harming’!
Thats great Katie, being aware of these sayings as they emerge and taking the opportunity to observe their arrival rather than mindlessly allowing them to be, we can begin to write them out of our vocabulary through instead choosing to be present with what is our true expression.
You are so right Jane, thank you for bringing my attention to be more aware of the many sayings that we can hear day in and day out that are actually fuelling the emptiness and mistruths in our society and are nothing more than empty words. What I love about Serge Benhayon’s books is the truth but also the expansion that is presented within any one quote, to read one can have us learning, pondering, contemplating or evolving for a long time (perhaps forever) thereafter. You get the sense there is no one ‘thought’ behind them, nothing steering us to think or believe a certain way but an openness that we can each get something out of that will always have a meaning or a reliability to us – now that’s truly one unified.
Awesome response Cherise. l feel the detached openness in Serge Benhayons, ‘Sayings’ book. Even the fact that they are referred to as ‘Sayings’. Simple, unimposing, Truth for all to share.
Cherise I totally agree with you, especially on Serge Benhayons books that share the truth, and how they most certainly give rise to much pondering and inspiration. Having read and re read there is always something I did not see the last time, giving proof to the fact of the many layers to them also. The words I read each day always seem so pertinent to what my life is presenting at that time.
Beautiful comment Cherise and so true. Serge Benhayon’s books are unique in this respect and deeply healing.
Great blog Jane and complimentary comment Cherise. I had not previously considered that these proverbs prescribe a particular line of thought but they do and hence restrictive.
I just realised something in reading your comment Cherise… and why I also love Serge Benhayon’s books… and that is that, they are always in every word offering evolution… how we choose to respond to this is of course up to us, but this does not change the fact that this is being offered.
Cherise you are spot on when you say that there is ‘expansion presented in any one quote’ offered by Serge Benhayon, as opposed to the confinement that comes from sayings such as ‘a woman’s work is never done’.
Jane, you’ve nailed it so well, my feeling reading your piece was how we use these sayings as a prop, a way to smooth things over and when we do so we’re stopping at being more intimate with others and we’re holding back – there feels such a measuring with them, a fitting in like applying a plaster when actually you need to do more and say see the doctor. These saying rob us of the true expression we may be wanting to say and in some cases as you’ve noted they can be a curse, and we use them to justify how things are and why they can’t change despite the quality, it’s far more evolutionary to be be awkward and learning to be truly expressing that to have a glib phrase to hand which makes others feel comfortable – what is true should be the underlying question in all expression, not reaching for an catchphrase.
So true monicag2, we do hold back and I wonder how often we miss glorious opportunities to shine by choosing these saying over our not so perfect but beautifully evolving expression?
Great comment Monicacag2, what I was feeling as I was reading your comment is that these sayings are often used as excuses to do things we know are not supportive or loving, ultimately avoiding responsibility and taking us away from our true expression. ‘Everything in moderation’ This is a classic example, I often hear this saying around alcohol and sugar consumption.
That’s such a great example ‘Everything in Moderation’ and you remind me using this and other sayings we’re immediately in justification and that’s a great flag to say we know what we’re doing is not true and not supportive, and we drag in these expressions to avoid our own feelings of knowing that we are off-track, and we also buy into the collective consciousness that exists around these sayings that says what we’re doing is ok because others do it – we actually dis-empower ourselves and our own deep knowing and what we know is true for us.
Absolutely Monicag2, so well said. Every time we choose to delay our evolution (returning to love) we ultimately are choosing to give our power away.
Yes these sayings ‘rob us of the true expression’ when what is needed to feel into each individual situation and express from the truth of our bodies. By falling back on them we communicate that we choose not to fully engage with others and love them enough to express truth.
Yes Helen, we short change ourselves and others when we operate in this way, and as you so clearly put it – failing to fully engage and feel what is needed in each interactions. As I read your comment I realised there’s a laziness and a dis-honouring when we fall back on expressions and do not fully meet with and engage the person in front of us, it’s great to feel and understand how important this is and it comes back simply to us being us and not needing any props (sayings or otherwise), if we turn up and fully engage we will know and feel what exactly is needed in each given situation.
Great blog thank you Jane. I have often thought about this myself when I hear a well-known saying like “that’s just the way life is” and everyone kinda sighs and shakes their head, or nods in agreement and I realise these keep us in same pig-pen of thinking things can never change. This line “Could they actually provide us with an excuse to remain comfortable with the status quo, fit in with others, avoid intimacy and thus give us an excuse not to shine?”. Check sister. So true. Thanks for exposing what is going on behind these sayings.
‘these keep us in same pig-pen of thinking things can never change’ exactly Sarah, the ‘that’s life!’ and ‘shit happens’ brush off comments really only offer a given-up attitude to an otherwise opportune moment to connect with what we’re really feeling, and discover what we otherwise shut off access to by instead choosing to right off further inquiry.
Great to take a deeper look at those sayings Jane that we often tend to just throw out there Parrot fashion, and see just how false they really are!
There is much to ponder upon in this, Jane….I’m very fond of certain sayings and though I realise they can be of Truth, if not delivered in or from the Livingness of that Truth, then they can feel quite dismissive and are actually avoiding the responsibility we have to deal with whatever has been presented at that time or has been felt in our bodies. I loved how you shared about not feeling to go for a walk and chose not to be in automatic pilot mode, instead choosing to be still with esoteric yoga. It points to the fact that unless the saying corresponds with the feelings in our bodies, it doesn’t matter how ‘good’ it was intended to be, it could actually be harmful. I’ll be paying more attention in future to how these sayings play out in my days. Thank you.
I have never really contemplated this previously Jane, but what you have shared here is so true. Those little sayings that often get repeated without thought or connection are so empty and can actually be harming. The frequency of the repetition of these one liners cements the harm. This directly opposes the truth that can be brought through connection and delivering a line that not only supports, but offers a healing for exactly what is needed at the time.
Yes, it’s amazing the impact the repetition of words or an action can have on us. We’re not brought up to discern for ourselves what does and doesn’t feel true, so as we’re growing up as impressionable beings, we often just accept that anyone older than us is passing down wisdom, which is so often not the case.
It is the quality of the sayings that makes a true difference, we can either heal or harm as said by Serge Benhayon. If a saying offers evolution it is healing if it reduces us to a lesser being and ties us to ideals and images it is harming.
As you say Jane, ‘Could it be that most sayings actually can stunt our communication and are used when we are unwilling to go deeper with our expression?’. I feel so, as I can see that when I use sayings I have gone for a habitual expression instead of bringing my own expression from the truth of who I am. This is surely cheating and diminishing the value I put on my truth and the expression of truth. The way to change the world is to live and express truth in the livingness of truth.
I like your turn of phrase “habitual expression”, Susan. On further reflection, I use this ALOT!! I often say, “he/she’s lost it” which I now realise is completely dismissive of that person and has no foundation in truth at all – for nothing is ever truly lost, our Soul is always there…to choose its light, and doesn’t actually hold or support that person. Rather it buys into the illusion and perpetuates the evil. So though on the surface it may be true that someone has ‘lost’ their connection, saying so only assists to cement it when it is delivered from a body that doesn’t choose to feel from a deeper truth.
Another great observation. That we use sayings in a habitual way instead of using our own words. I know I am being lazy when I do this, as in choosing a default regurgitation rather than attending to what I am saying with my full attention and care. The next level of awareness is to be honest about the stunting impact of this on everyone involved.
Furthermore what you’ve offered by way of understanding for why we fall back on these sort of empty sayings is very insightful. I know how insidiously they can try to creep into my expression on occasion, and it is always when I know that offering the truth will ‘rock the boat’ and that an empty saying is then a way of placating and putting an end to any further evolving conversation on the matter.
That is exactly what the sayings of old do Jenny, cut off further enquiry as an abrupt end to an otherwise opportune moment to investigate further whats behind the feelings we feel.
Yes quite a game we play so willingly… we say yes to these mechanisms left, right and centre to ensure we do not allow the fullness of who we are to be expressed, nor the full awareness that goes hand in hand.
They can be indidious, Jenny and I recognise the same habit within my expression. Jane’s blog has “nailed it” and “cracked this issue wide open” and I’m for one very thankful for it as I, too avoid “rocking the boat” for fear of evolving the relationship into seemingly “uncharted waters”. So much of what we say can be referenced to another’s expression that I am only realising now that nothing is ever truly new or original and that Truth is eternal if spoken from a truly living body – it doesn’t have to use common sayings but can if the context is served by it.
Yes very true Peta, we can use those common sayings, but I imagine if used to serve Truth, then will only be to highlight the UN-truth they perpetuate.
This is a great observation. That those familiar everyday sayings dropped into our conversations are like ‘full stops’ for expansive, explorative and evolutionary communication. It is like an old saying holds loads of weight simply because of its history and this perceived authority cuts off further discussion.
Yes… it’s a socially acceptable ‘full stop’ to any discussion that threatens to head towards honesty, let alone truth.
Yes it is a way to reduce ourselves to a lesser realm, saying stop this is what it is and no more further. Its an insidious way to delay evolution and keep us captive in our human beliefs and images.
Thank you for sharing Jane. It is interesting how these sayings roll off the tongue and are said so easily because we have heard them through out our life, especially in childhood, yet when we stop and really listen to the words they can cap us in so many ways. These sayings are so unlike the The ‘Sayings’ books by Serge Benhayon which may not always be so easy to roll off the tongue or remember, but they have a great depth and wisdom, and are truly Heaven sent.
True Alison they are designed to roll off the tongue its a wonder why they do for their specific purpose to keep you less.
Jane the stark contrast you provide between the common, everyday sayings from your past, and those you quote from Serge Benhayon’s books, could not be more apparent. The emptiness of the former when I read them inspires nothing in me that feels true, whereas with the latter, I want to read and re-read, soak up the meaning as it feels uplifting and sustaining.
Yes and it is not a saying about one specific aspect of life that is picked on and put into a box, but its an all encompassing wisdom that is presented and it does not refer to what we do or how we behave, but to who we are and how we can live from a quality that supports us to re-connect back to who we truly are.
Yes Rachel, the difference is immense… there is no comparison other than to see the complete contrast. It is as though we are seemingly offered the world through these sayings, they are meant to support us makes sense of things, accept, get on with life with greater equanimity… but in truth they offer the complete opposite. Truth is spherical, as you have indicated, it applies to every aspect of life, never one narrow part… an all encompassing wisdom, as you say.
True Rachel, and it has no end point after it is read. It can be read again and become a study or a livingness through the depth of the intelligence of where it came from, until there comes a point when where it comes from, under the cycles of the universe, re-aligns to constellate a new way of being. Thus is the beauty of sayings and quotes from Serge Benhayon.
I love reading Serge Benhayon’s books too Jenny, I can feel the truth of the words in my body, that said, when common everyday sayings are used we must be able to feel them in our bodies too, we just choose to ignore what we’re feeling and let things slide.
Yes Sandra, I used to read Serge’s first book That Way it Is every night until I could feel the warmth in my chest… then I would feel complete and go to sleep. That’s quite a bedtime story… and one day that will be what determines a ‘good read’!
Beautiful sharing Jenny, the feeling of warmth and completeness through reading where do we have this in this world? Kids are getting anxious and excited by bedtime stories, leaving them worried about what is going to happen or how their future might look like. A bedtime story that connects you to the grandness we are and lets you feel complete in yourself, being hold by yourself in the womb of the Universe. Very very beautiful.
And looking at the two alongside each other makes the difference between the intelligence of the mind and the intelligence of the body very clear to me. Our minds process words and ideas without the support and true intelligence of our bodies and their ability to feel the truth of everything.
Beautifully said Matilda… ‘Our minds process works and ideas without the support and true intelligence of our bodies and their ability to feel the truth of everything.’ This is the missing piece… we have lost touch with our bodies, consuming so much food and drink that is numbing and stimulating, rendering the one in-built gauge we have useless. Then we rely on the mind to analyse, consider and try to think our way through life. Finding true north requires us to re-instate the body as our marker and gauge for truth, no question.
Beautifully said Matilda, true intelligence is a whole body experience and not just the mind, as connecting deeply within opens us up to vast wisdom of the universe.
Yes, Jane, many sayings come from a hurt or proposed way to manage a hurt.
That’s interesting, l never thought of that way.
They make a very good avoidance tactic too Christoph.
I agree Christoph and also perhaps used to justify why we’re overriding our feelings and in doing so giving our power away.
Great point Christoph. Many sayings are in affect assisting us to stay where we are and not ask us to be more. And as they are popular, we think that this is normal as this is what most people are choosing. We can see how we have been hoodwinked with language, a way to keep us small and not evolve.
Spot on Christoph, and when you surrender you have all that is required to lift you.