STOP in the Name of Love!

Recently I was in the midst of a big project and I had shared with some friends that I was really tired. Someone suggested that I take the morning easy and rest in preparation for the big meeting I had around lunchtime.

I am pretty sure that I scoffed at the idea – “Are you for real? I have too much to do! Have you not seen my to-do list?” But something inside of me was asking me to go deeper with this and neither gloss over what I was feeling, nor what was being suggested to me, as I had done in the past. So in that moment I expressed that I didn’t know how to – I didn’t know how to stop.

Some suggestions then came forth about how to stop and I realised that I actually do know how to stop, but I don’t put it into practice often enough.

I just kept going.

  • Just get this job done.
  • Just tidy up the kitchen.
  • Just send that email.
  • Just put that load of washing on… and then I will stop.

Even then, when I did stop, I never really stopped to truly rest or nourish my body. When I ‘downed tools’ I stopped for a cuppa and a biscuit, just as I used to stop with a glass of wine and a cigarette: or when I ignored nearly all of the messages to stop from my body, it increased the intensity of the messages and said very loudly, ‘STOP!’ and I got sick and was forced to stop and rest – often feeling like my body had betrayed me.

But through Universal Medicine’s presentations, I am learning how to be with my body and listen to the wisdom it shares quietly, taking the moments to stop and be with my body and to nourish it.

I have also learnt the importance of taking care of myself, and through the healing modalities of Universal Medicine I am learning to bring to a halt the relentless momentum that I have been living with that makes it difficult for me to stop.

So I stopped in the name of love (for me), lovingly put on some moisturiser and covered my body in eye pillows (small heat packs). Then I lay down for a couple of hours and rested. I even fell asleep.

The world did not fall apart. It did not end because I took two hours off. I simply rested because that was what my body was sharing with me it needed to do. I awoke with a renewed sense of care and love for myself and with a deep appreciation of taking the time to stop. I then went about my day much more openly, rather than in the tension of having to push through to get my ‘stuff done’. And P.S. – the stuff got done!

Nowadays I am looking to bring in more stop moments – a loving work in progress because some days I still override the need to stop. I am, however, choosing more and more to be present with my body, listening to what it is saying and stopping when it is needed.

I am learning that life is simply more joyful when I choose the quality in which I do something and that these choices about my quality are equally as important as my actual output.

In loving appreciation of Serge Benhayon and his family; and of my friends, who asked me to reconnect to something that I knew, as well as a deep appreciation of me, for taking the time to stop.

By Sarah Flenley, Cairns, Far North Queensland, Australia

Further Reading:
The ‘Self-Care ABC’
Stopping Within Sight of the Finish Line
Early to Bed, Early to Rise, Makes you Healthy, Wealthy and Wise

850 thoughts on “STOP in the Name of Love!

  1. Thank you for sharing this beautiful reminder that being in connection to the quality of who we are supersedes the quality of doing any day and in fact brings greater enjoyment to all that we do regardless of what it is.

  2. More and more these days I am correcting myself when I say “I don’t know” when it comes to my feelings or choices being or needing to be made. It might not come straight away but if I open up with “ I don’t know YET” soon the answers become apparent.

  3. It is challenging sometimes to bring ourselves to a stop, to honour ourselves and not override all the messages our body gives us, when we actually stop and allow ourselves to rest, our movements afterwards are of a much more refined and delicate quality as we are connected to our essence.

  4. This was great for me to read this morning before I am about to start my day and think of all the things that I need to do! Especially this ‘and listen to the wisdom it shares quietly,’ I feel like I rarely just give myself the time to stop and be with me as reading your blog what I could see was when I do things like send an email or put a load of washing on etc I think that is me stopping!!!!!! It looks like I have something to learn here … to listen and care for my body more.

  5. Recognize this fully Sarah, how we love to stay in the motion of things. Because if we would stop we would actually feel how awful, tired, stressed etc we feel. In other words, in motion, keeping on doing things we override the signals the body, our best friend, is giving us.

  6. I can relate very much what you shared about not knowing how to stop and in my case I didn’t even know how to be with myself. I felt very strange and uncomfortable being alone on my own so I looked for a lot of distractions, activities and relationships in order to not feel my own discomfort. Today I appreciate my choice of learning step by step how to care, be and embrace myself as I know deep down within that I deserve. As you said Sarah, it is a loving work in process that feels very enriching and new.

  7. ‘I awoke with a renewed sense of care and love for myself and with a deep appreciation of taking the time to stop.’ Such a precious feeling Sarah. Instead of pushing ourselves through to getting things done there is another way, we can listen and honour what our body has to say. I’m amazed of how grateful it is and how quickly it regenerates after a difficult day. It sustains us in a very loving and unconditional way so it is worth to take care it deeply.

  8. When we listen to our body saying ‘Stop’ we start to understand why we have to take more loving care of ourselves.

  9. ‘So I stopped in the name of love (for me), lovingly put on some moisturiser and covered my body in eye pillows (small heat packs). Then I lay down for a couple of hours and rested. I even fell asleep.
    The world did not fall apart. It did not end because I took two hours off. I simply rested because that was what my body was sharing with me it needed to do.’ And what a deeply loving learning this was, not just for you, but also for all of us whom you share it with, for we get to learn and grow along with you.

  10. To have the doing and then the downtime or relief is a pretty common pattern – and so what I have understood from Universal Medicine is the huge importance of cutting this cycle and actually understanding the important balance of repose and motion. And that if we are in repose – it is very different to switch off time or just sleep – it is about a surrender in the body and not taking any more new information in but rather confirming what we have taken in during the motion phase. This allows us to see a fuller and more complete picture of what is at play.

  11. Sarah, I love this, it makes me laugh every time I read it and reminds me that I can put myself first and to rest when I need to; ‘The world did not fall apart. It did not end because I took two hours off. I simply rested because that was what my body was sharing with me it needed to do.’

  12. I love the title of this blog and am choosing this more and more but can still find it challenging at work where my self-worth can still be tied up in what I achieve so I put pressure on myself to keep going because there is so much to ‘do’ and in that lose the sense of my beingness and the invaluable communication from my body.

  13. It can feel sometimes like I am on a relentless treadmill of tasks that need to be done. But actually, given the fact that there is a continuous stream of activities that require my attention, this means that I can actually stop and rest and pick them all up again, because they will not stop being there, so I can be in authority of how I do what needs to be done and not the other way around.

  14. Stopping can be really challenging, as when we stop we feel everything we have been living up to that stop moment. That’s not always that comfortable because we can feel the rush, push, drive, even if we have gone in the opposite direction and given up or checked out. Who wants to feel that? The important thing there, is it’s ok to feel all of that and more. There is nothing wrong with feeling any of that, in fact it is important to feel this. What’s more important is not to make a judgement on it, just observe and feel and nominate. Through stopping we offer our bodies moments to rest and return to ourselves. It’s a caring moment for our body. These then become the foundation of which we can build our day on feeling more rested, present with our body and much more solid in ourselves. It builds a quality that we can live the whole of our life in, still being productive and busy, but without it impacting on our well-being and our body.

  15. We do not stop enough and breathe, breathe our own breath and stand still to feel where we are at. If we would, actually we are calling ourselves up for a change, a shift and deepening. We also would need less and less of those extreme stop moments where we can not but stop, forcefully so.. Why, if actually we didn’t truly in the first place need that ?

  16. Love that “I actually do know how to stop, but I don’t put it into practice often enough.”. Very much a classic one because often we do know what we should do, what is a more loving or caring choice, but it is easier to just keep going in our old ways. Because if we put it in practice, it will show us things to work on and we have to deal with feeling amazing too! Sometimes when you identify with life being hard, this is the hardest one to deal with.

  17. I recently stopped over the Christmas break and oh my goodness – it was incredible. I became so aware of so many things and how I operate in life. I’ve now committed to stopping more often to allow myself this grace, not only to rest and rejuvenate but also to reflect.

  18. It has come to a point where I am really starting to feel I can no longer override my body, which is such a blessing. Over the last week or so I have seen I have been very much a yes person in saying yes I can do lots of things but 1. am i discerning what I am saying yes to and 2. what is the quality I am doing tasks/etc in as if I say yes to everything. I can relate to a similar scenario as to what you share where there is a forever growing ‘to do’ list and I have put myself to one side of this. This is still very much a learning process for me in being fully committed to life but also taking deep care of myself as well. And it is even in the little things like last night while having my dinner (without a computer!) I found it really hard to just sit there and be with myself while having my dinner and not contact/message people on my phone etc .. seems to be the epidemic everywhere at the moment!

  19. ‘ I awoke with a renewed sense of care and love for myself and with a deep appreciation of taking the time to stop.’ That’s the beauty of taking care of our body. It will offer us the space that is naturally there, but we no longer feel when we push ourselves to keep on going.

  20. If there is no self-love as part of our foundation, then the only time we stop is until we are given a correction whether that is through illness, accident or death. At the very core of our being we are all love, so it is true medicine to embrace that which is our natural right and stop to care and deeply appreciate who we are.

    1. Beautiful Fiona. Caring ourselves is the most simple and natural thing we can do. This didn’t was my normal before I knew Universal Medicine but after all I’ve realized how enriching and joyful life can be when I make the choice of deeply caring myself.

  21. I’ve forgotten recently how to stop and have found myself in the ‘I will just ….’ mode of operating and it feels horrible as my body tenses and I end up feeling utterly exhausted at the end of the day. Taking a stop moment brings us back to ourselves which means the quality of what we then do is then completely different.

  22. Yes self-appreciation is key otherwise we can easily drag our bodies through whatever we’ve chosen to do. Making life about quality rather than function…I love it!

  23. I experience this joyfulness with quality based output too Sarah. Output without quality is a relentless and exhausting pushing and rushing throughout the day.
    “I am learning that life is simply more joyful when I choose the quality in which I do something and that these choices about my quality are equally as important as my actual output”.

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