by Nicole Serafin, Tintenbar, NSW, Australia
I recently attended a presentation by Universal Medicine that dealt with relationships and letting people in.
At this presentation, the level of love that was being presented was so deep you could not help but melt into what was here being offered – love and only love.
I was able to feel what it is to be able to let another in: to truly let people in, without any reservations, no matter who they are. To let go of any fear of being hurt, or that another may use my fragility and vulnerability against me at some point.
Why is it we choose to live a life without letting people in? Even those close to us – children, partners, friends – only get to see part of who we truly are. Granted, they may see more than some, but it is still gauged upon how safe we feel with them, how much we trust them.
Have you ever let someone in only to feel hurt by them later on? And then from that hurt choose to keep others even further away just in case it was to happen again?
It’s absurd really, when you think about it! We are not being who we truly are just in case we get hurt… when it is we who are harming ourselves by not letting people in and being all of us in the first place. I think it hurts much more to not be who we are, and to live the guarded, protected versions.
What we are missing out on, AND what our friends and families are missing out on, is enormous.
Since realising that I was still holding back the true essence of me, and still hiding behind a wall of ‘what ifs’, I came to realise that if I truly loved and allowed, then nothing another did or said could ever harm me. Yes, I may feel hurt, but that does not mean that others are worthy of any less than my being all of me, nor am I worth less than being all of me.
In order for me to build a true relationship with myself and others, I had to knock down that wall, drop the protection and let people in; and let all of me out – without holding back my love.
The power of one is awesome, we know. However, the power of many is magnified. If we can fully open up to another and let them in, we can do this with everyone. What a different world that would be!
The workshop was for me, like getting married all over again – I felt myself opening up and letting people in like never before, a new, true sense of intimacy – being all of me. I realised that I can do this with anyone; with myself, another, and with all of humanity.
We deserve to be all that we are, and to share this with all others. If we live behind a wall of ‘what ifs’, our life will never feel complete. We will always be looking for something outside of ourselves to fulfil an emptiness that honestly only we can fill… as it is us that we are missing in the first place. No one and no thing can fill that… well, not for long anyhow.
I now know that by connecting to and living all of who I am, in all that I do, I am letting all of me out, and letting people in. There is no longer the emptiness that I carried around for so long.
My relationships are now based on my needing nothing. I am now able to have true relationships with all those I come into contact with. At times there may be some hurt, but I am able to very quickly return to love, and the hurt is insignificant compared to the joy and glory that is present when I choose to live all of me.
Thank you Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine for the constant love, inspiration and foundation that you are. The unwavering support and life that is lived by you creates a foundation which allows me to feel that life is not about doing, but simply about being.
The Truth about Universal Medicine 
To not be who we are and express that, the love we are, is harming for all, ‘We are not being who we truly are just in case we get hurt… when it is we who are harming ourselves by not letting people in and being all of us in the first place.’
“the barriers of protection become our self made prison.” That is very true Ariana, our focus is on avoiding another hurt, which is understandable, but it hurts us more to love absent of the gorgeous love and natural warmth we are. We shut ourselves off instead of embracing the situation as an opportunity to learn, become more understanding, and develop wisdom through observing what has truly occurred behind the scenes. People are all in their own stuff and even though abuse can be directed at us we can learn to let it go as ‘not being personal’.
“At times there may be some hurt, but I am able to very quickly return to love, and the hurt is insignificant compared to the joy and glory that is present when I choose to live all of me.” That’s the key isn’t it, having a standard for ourselves that says being all of who we are, including our love, and working on any hurt that comes up that tries to convince us to keep ourselves locked away behind a wall.
Living who we are not is such an awful experience, that seems to have no beginning or end, it is just debilitating, and yet this is what I have done most of my life, under the guise of who would want to truly know me, if they felt what is going on inside of my whole being. Yet this is just it, letting myself being seen for who I truly am is the way out of such a dilemma and ultimately bringing about the love that is there within me.
Reading this I got the point that it is so important for us to read the energy behind people and situations. If I understand the energy behind anyone or a situation, and understand the energy within me at that moment, there is no hurt.
Understanding can be such a game changer, ‘it is so important for us to read the energy behind people and situations.’
I find it more difficult to let people in if I have had an expectation on them to behave a certain way, which of course can’t actually be met, so it’s a set up to fail. And to be realistic it’s true we can still feel hurt, but it doesn’t have to mean a life in withdrawal and protection. What I am finding at the moment is to allow myself to bounce back, to come out of patterns of protection and holding my full self back, and let myself to see that the situation and hurt doesn’t have to dictate how I am, I can still be all of me and work on understanding people and detaching. “Yes, I may feel hurt, but that does not mean that others are worthy of any less than my being all of me, nor am I worth less than being all of me.”
A beautiful sharing, and way of being Melinda; and yes letting go of our expectations and taking things personally is so important, ‘let myself to see that the situation and hurt doesn’t have to dictate how I am, I can still be all of me and work on understanding people and detaching.’
It is absurd that we hold ourselves back from living who we truly are just in case we might get hurt and we get hurt because we are not living who we are. It may not be being who we truly are that is the cause of our hurt.
Yes, we can create our hurts simply by having ‘our own’ expectations and pictures in how we want another to be, so crazy.
“Thank you Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine for the constant love, inspiration and foundation that you are. The unwavering support and life that is lived by you creates a foundation which allows me to feel that life is not about doing, but simply about being.” Beautifully said and the love is forever deepening.
If we lived in a void or probably space within, would it not be an opening to build a relationship within that area so we are feeling complete, as you have shared Nicole and thus we are deepening our essence? So opening our essence by allowing ourselves to feel what we are living has the most loving simplicity that we choose to be in, and in doing so we return to a deeper level of connection that everyone can feel. And all this starts with us letting in who we are, so others can then openly receive that reflection.
When we protect ourselves from others we actually build a wall of protection from ourselves as well and that is painful, to not know yourself, to not feel who you truly are is much more painful than having anything hurled at us by another.
This is a great point and makes me realise how crazy it is that we change ourselves rather than staying true to who we naturally are; ‘It’s absurd really, when you think about it! We are not being who we truly are just in case we get hurt.’
‘If we live behind a wall of ‘what ifs’, our life will never feel complete’. So true Nicole.
I agree Elizabeth for the quality of relationship we have with ourselves and how we care for ourselves is the foundation of and determines the quality of all our interactions and connections with others.
We keep waiting for other people to make it safe to be ourselves, but this leaves us with a world of people not being themselves and being guarded just so they are safe. Like bad habits passed from one generation to the next, this game of waiting until its safe keeps the whole mess going.
Yes, we all then live in protection; we are unable to truly love another, or receive another’s love, so we end up living in a world devoid of love.
The knowing that it hurts so much to hold back our expression our love and being all we are is very real and feels very nurturing to make changes to open up our selves our hearts and feel the oneness and love we all are and let it in also.
“We are not being who we truly are just in case we get hurt… when it is we who are harming ourselves by not letting people in and being all of us in the first place.” Such a great reminder Nicole – time to let go of the old patterns and open up to what is there for us all to share, and we’ll all benefit at the end of the day.
‘Hiding behind a wall of what ifs’ – how often do we determine what we’re going to say based on how we think it will be received?
It is absurd, and quite the set-up, that we don’t allow others to see all that we are in case we get hurt, yet feel hurt because others don’t get or see who we are. The more we deepen our relationship with the love of who we are in essence, we need less to seek love from another and instead are more open to share the joy of who we are and what we stand for as we know that by virtue of the love we are within, that in essence we are all of the same quality.
And this self made prison is hurting us all. There is no truth in protecting that origin that we all are – love.
It is far more healing to allow ourselves to be love, with no protection, ‘I now know that by connecting to and living all of who I am, in all that I do, I am letting all of me out, and letting people in. There is no longer the emptiness that I carried around for so long.’