Trust and Appreciation

For the past 4 plus years I have been attending Universal Medicine courses, presentations and workshops, followed by my first retreat at Lennox Heads in 2015. Every single experience has been absolutely amazing. Each time I come away feeling clarity, love, purpose and truth, and feeling deeply supported.

Prior to Universal Medicine I was coping with life, not fully living in joy or in harmony with my body or my family. I had dealt with sexual, physical, verbal and mental abuse throughout my childhood. Reflecting back, I realised that the people I loved dearly have been the ones who attacked me the most.

What really hurt deep was not what was physically done to me but seeing clearly that the people who chose to abuse me were simply very hurt and choosing to vent it out on others. The sadness for me was seeing that they chose to suppress love in order to attack and defend.

I too then chose to reduce my immense love and joy as a form of protection so I didn’t have to feel the pain. I simply didn’t feel safe to be shining with joy and love, so I deliberately chose to tone it down. From about 7 years old I decided that this was the safest way to function through life – to not be too joyful in case I get attacked. This was my false sense of security and investment to make life about keeping me safe.

My deliberate choice to not be too joyful in case something horrible might happen was a contracted way to live. I thought if I made myself small by holding myself back it would not attract too much attention, therefore, I felt safe. This was what I had chosen pretty much my whole life.

Through attending courses, presentations and workshops at Universal Medicine I was able to see that with this false sense of security I was not truly living. With my fear of fully living my life and being joyful, I was capping myself so that I couldn’t see any possibilities that were out there waiting for me to explore, to express and to share.

I came to the realisation that life isn’t just about me but it is about encompassing everything and everyone.

I came to understand and appreciate that we are all deeply connected and how protection is a contracted way to live that is completely false. The truth about my choices was exposed and this was such a healing to understand and to heal what was not loving.

From years of exposing what was not love and starting to choose love again, I have experienced something I have never thought was possible – an amazing expansion. During Sacred Esoteric Healing Level 5 I felt the loving energy of a full house of people. It was incredible… out of this world. During a break I lay down on a massage table, closed my eyes and felt the energy in the room. I felt I was finally home with my family, even though I only knew a small percentage of the people there. I felt Love was emanating from within and I could feel it all round me; I could feel the love in everyone’s voices and the entire hall. I thanked God with appreciation in my heart for constellating me to be there in the hall to experience this amazing power of love that has always been there for me to access.

For the first time in my life I felt completely safe to truly allow my love and joy to shine, to be who I am and to not hold back expressing the joy I felt. 

I felt deeply connected to me, to my body, to everyone, everything and to God. The love I felt for humanity was so absolute, so full and expanded. There are no words to capture what I had experienced, simply deep appreciation for everyone.

A huge massive thank you to everyone who attended Sacred Esoteric Healing Level 5 for expressing love and for creating the space for me to trust and to love again. Now that I have experienced what true connection to everyone and everything is, I know that whenever I feel disconnected I can choose to re-connect to love and to connect to God in an instant. In knowing that He is in me, all round me in every moment, always beside me and in every part of me and in absolutely everything, I can then choose to not hold back my joy but to fully express it with every part of my being, to celebrate brotherhood and return to God.

by Chan Ly

Further Reading:
Life and Its Gifts – Appreciation
Brought Back to Life
Before, During And After Sacred Esoteric Healing

1,540 thoughts on “Trust and Appreciation

  1. Certainly there are no words to describe what can be felt when we connect with the Love we are. Chanly I can relate with what you experienced in the treatment table, a sense of coming back home that confirms the infinite beauty within us. Thanks Universal Medicine for sharing the tools that makes possible such a revealing experience about who we really are.

  2. Our true power is lived when we are at one with the love we innately are within in which joy is naturally expressed. To hold back our joy is to dishonour the love we are, as such our connection to our divinity. Practice holding back enough we lose sense of our multidimensionality, that moving with the power of love is. our natural way of being and is in fact what we are here to reflect, regardless of the response or reaction.

  3. It is a true blessing that we have Universal Medicine and their modalities that support us to remember who we truly are. It is simply incredible the level of healing that they bring to us.

    1. I am deeply grateful for these modalities and they are here for us all to access and utilise to the max. What they offer to people is incredible, life-changing and super supportive for us to continue to evolve and connect to each other and to our Soul.

  4. Not every child needs to experience the level of abuse you were subjected to before they make the choice to shut down their light and to fade into their surroundings so they don’t stand out, but going through something like you experienced will understandably destroy any trust that a child has in the world around them. How beautiful though you have been finally able to re-connect to you, “to everyone, everything and to God”, and are now back home where you belong and where you are loved and appreciated for who you are.

    1. It is a blessing to finally come home and to be surrounded by people who are not afraid to be themselves. The level of love and appreciation I have experienced at Universal Medicine has blown me away. I also realised that everywhere is my home, this gorgeous feeling of coming home can be connected to anywhere in the world.

    2. Even if a child is given everything materially, best home/food/private school etc. There can still be a lack of true love which is a felt quality rather than an action or inaction. What’s amazing about the student body is that there is such a diverse group of lives lived all able to express love equally.

      1. This is so true Leigh. I know of many who grew up in a home that was stable, felt loved, were fed and clothed well and lovingly cared for, but there was still something missing in their lives. And that was the understanding of their parents of the truth of what it is to be a child. That they are not empty vessels to be filled with our life experiences but beautifully wise human beings who are naturally connected to who they are and to the world around them through their clairsentience.

  5. If we never deal with our hurts they hold us back immensely from who we truly are, this is a beautiful and inspiring account Chan of the love and joy we can feel when we make the choice to finally let go of hurts, this is true healing.

    1. Thank you Anna and it was through attending the Universal Medicine courses, presentations, and workshops that I have learned to let go of hurts and also how to not accumulate any more. I have been given so many incredible tools to deal with old hurts and any new ones that come my way. I also realise I only get hurt when I take things personally.

  6. These experiences remind us of who we are and that we can always make more loving choices in our own lives.

    1. I agree with you Jennifer and also people around us remind and inspire us to make more loving choices. For me, it was from people at Universal Medicine that I have been deeply inspired in every way.

  7. Our childhood hurts set us up to live in a life of protection, yet when we drop that protection and connect more deeply within ourselves, we find our essence, and in that we can feel another’s essence too, and that changes everything because we are no longer trapped in a life of protection but open to the joy and love we feel from the inside out.

    1. I agree Sally and being in protection doesn’t protect us at all. It hurts us more to be in protection, whereas being open to showing our vulnerability, sensitivity, tenderness and all of who we are is a true strength. It allows us to feel it all, the hurts, and the love and to really feel how amazing we are.

  8. In reading your words, I can see that there is a great indictment for us as a human race, that even just one child should learn that it is safer to shut down the expression of their joy, and what’s worse – is how this was allowed to carry on into adulthood, how this one precious child was left to be in life without the expression of their pure joy. If taken very seriously, which by all accounts it should be, we as a humanity are way, way of track, just by the juxtaposition of the sadness of a child in the company of adults who are too sad themselves to notice or to help.

    1. Great point Shami and I agree, humanity has been off track for thousands of years. We are in an era where I feel this will be corrected and we are being shown how to return to our true path and we will no longer be able to ignore the call to return to love.

    1. This has been my experience Willem, it is a beautiful and magical experience to hold ourselves in love and therefore naturally hold others in love too and from this, we can feel without a doubt that we are all deeply connected and are One.

  9. “….to not be too joyful in case I get attacked.” I wonder how many people in the world have done the same thing? A large number I suspect. How different the world would look if this wasnt the case, and everyone of us simply shared the joy that we are and that we feel all the time.

    1. I have wondered about the same thing Sandra, my guess is that it is most likely that everyone may have experienced some form of holding back from expressing joy and love at some point in their life. I find it is our experience of seeing people around us doing this that we can often learn as a young child that it is not OK to be who we are and to be joyful because the reflection we receive often isn’t a joy but a contracted way of being and expressing.

    1. It certainly is Fiona, it doesn’t make any sense does it? I didn’t understand why we as humans made such unintelligent choices but I started to understand why after attending Universal Medicine presentations, workshops and course, and then everything in life simply made so much sense.

  10. We can make life look good by avoiding challenges or keeping ourselves small and we might think it is all good. Enter The Way of The Livingness and it is really exposing of the fact we are not truly living but getting by and existing and therefor not vital and joyful.

    1. And, why would we choose a life of abuse and misery when we can choose a life full of joy and vitality? The Way of The Livingness is definitely the way forward for humanity to experience true harmony and love.

  11. Abuse is so normal in society that it is common for us not to realise just how much abuse we endure each and every day. It is absurd and unimaginable to most that this is the case until you feel real love and connection with another. Hence our responsibility to share all the love we are and have reconnected to so that others can be inspired to live it too.

    1. Yes, I agree Joshua. Abuse has become so normalised in society, it seems to take extreme forms of abuse for our society to raise concerns. But I feel it is the subtle forms of abuse that leads to extreme forms of abuse, so it makes sense to me to address all forms of abuse if we are to eliminate abuse from our lives. Also, this cannot be achieved without reintroducing love back into the equation.

  12. Love this, thank you for sharing Chan Ly. Most of us spend a long time walking around in an armour of protection without even realising we’re doing it. As I’ve slowly built more of a connection to my body and what I can actually feel, rather than what I think I’m feeling, the contraction and old patterns of holding back are more clearly felt too, but also how useless these patterns of behaviour are. We think we’re protecting ourselves by playing less but we’re kidding ourselves, because we all have the choice to see who we, and each other, really are regardless of the behaviours we might put in the way to try to cover up that essence.

    1. Awesome sharing Bryony. I feel to add that it is crazy why we would choose to reduce ourselves and go into protection when it doesn’t actually protect us in any way. It doesn’t sound very intelligence does it? And, when we can see that we are choosing something over and over again that simply doesn’t work but the tendency to go into protection is very common. So, it would be great to question, what is the source of intelligence that drives us to go into protection.

  13. We are masters in the art of reducing ourselves. These are waters in which we know how to swim to the point that we know how to reduce ourselves to the point that we can avoid feeling pain (a situation that invites you to [further] reduce yourself to it).

    1. I agree Eduardo and it doesn’t help that everywhere we look around us, many people are also doing exactly the same thing, reducing their joy. It is when we receive a different reflection, one of full joy that it supports us to realise reducing ourselves is not the way. Reducing ourselves in any shape or form simply causes more pain and suffering, and this can leave us stuck in the cycle of abuse and misery if we are not prepared to choose a different way.

  14. Thank you for sharing Chan. Unfortunately, this toning down is an all too common occurrence. We all know it happens because we can see it and feel how our children change. Then we also feel it when a child is fully connected, and we know that this is what we miss, and that can bring up jealousy and resentment towards a child. So, all in all, one big set up.

    1. Yes, I agree Julie, I also see this is a common occurrence for many people and this is why it is so important for us to reflect love and truth without holding back or toning down our joy. It is natural for us to be joyful and it hurts us all to hold it back.

  15. With this marker you cannot ever pretend that you don’t know that you are love. Not as a belief, but as something you know in your body, also because you have experienced it recently.

    1. When we experience love, it is recognised by our body immediately and it is then also a marker for how we can live.

  16. We can only ever really trust when we reconnect to our essence, to who we truly are. And this connection is so worth appreciating.

    1. It certainly is Kathleen, and it has been an easy process for me to trust from being surrounded by people who are living the loving way. I found it was very easy to trust when I was met by people who were deeply respectful, loving, honest and caring. This was what I had experienced at Universal Medicine, and it was very easy for my whole body to surrender and trust in a space that emanated absolute love.

    2. When we learn to “trust and reconnect to the essence of who we truly are”, we heal and this brings new understanding to root causes of past abuses from self and others.

  17. It seems you have found the way, Chan. And even if this was just one marker, you now know that this is our and your natural state, which from one moment can expand to a consistent level of living.

    1. Thank you Willem. I am deeply grateful that I have found the way thanks to Universal Medicine and the many, many amazing tools for life I have learnt from them. It has been life changing to apply these tools and my life just keeps deepening and expanding in a loving way that I did not think was possible 6 years ago.

    1. Yes, I recall when I realised how much I had deliberately been toning down love and joy, I remember it hurt a lot. But it didn’t last long, because once I nominated what was going on, I was able to let it go and make a different choice.

  18. This is so beautiful Chan . . . ” I felt I was finally home with my family, even though I only knew a small percentage of the people there” . . . We are finally home when we reconnect to the love that we are and when we do reconnect we feel the love in everyone else as well and then we wonder why we had advoided connecting for so long.

    1. I know what you mean Kathleen. It also feels like once I finally returned to the love from within, I have also returned to humanity and no longer see myself as separate.

    2. “We are finally home when we reconnect to the love that we are” and with this knowing we find that home is not a fixed location but where-ever we are.

    3. We build walls of protection as a defense against hurt and abuse but can only reverse this choice by deepening our love for self and others.

  19. Imagine that… we have created a world where it is possible for someone to make the decision to not be too joyful in case they get attacked. That when we see a light shining, far from being inspired to turn our own light on, we instead go about stamping the other light out. This simple sharing shows how twisted things have gotten, and that we need to find another way. Serge Benhayon is leading that way forward.

    1. I agree Simon, Serge Benhayon is certainly leading the way for humanity to live all of who we are, and he inspires us all to turn up our light and shower our world with love and joy that resides in us all.

  20. Until you attend an event like Sacred Esoteric Healing where there is harmony, warmth, a lack of comparison and jealousy, presenters who speak with you from the wisdom of their bodies rather than at you, it’s hard to imagine this is possible. We have accepted group work as being stressful, anxiety provoking, ‘rah-rah-ing’ or with participants all pretending to be ok but not going anywhere near true connection. I also appreciate that I know what it can feel like and what can result when we come together in unity and harmony.

    1. This is what I love about the Sacred Esoteric Healing course Fiona, you have captured exactly how I felt. The love and harmony in the room was always deeply felt and what we get met with is absolute love.

  21. Could it be that toning down our love and joy to fit in life is a conscious choice to avoid to live that power and be the reflection of change, simply by you living with that love and joy?

    1. Great question Nico, for me the answer is yes, it was a conscious choice and I can remember at what age I chose this. It was a very calculated and deliberate choice that led to many threads of complications, sadness and emptiness, where no one benefits.

      1. Thank you for your honesty Chan Lee, as it makes me also look for myself and be honest about my choices in life. When did I chose to become a participant in this creation and leave my tender and delicate being to succumb to the misery this brings. Yes I do know when, and it was deliberate as I pretend I was not knowing and with that handed myself over to what other people told me about how to and not to behave.

  22. Return from a contracted way of life and entering the realm of true joy and freedom to express the love that we are without any suppression or conversion, is what we all and deserve. We only have to make the choice to choose that for ourselves as it will not be given to us by society as that is fed and held by the contracted way of living of the many many people that are holding it. We can only deconstruct this way of living from the inside out, a responsibility for each and everyone individually to one day return to.

    1. Yes, I agree Nico and no one can do this for us. We can embrace support from others but no one can make us take responsibility for life, it is up to us to embrace it in full or we can choose to live in contraction.

      1. Yes Chan Lee, we have to embrace life in full and understand that it is all about our way home, returning to a way of being we all left long ago because we wanted to experiment with creation, a way of being that is at the root of what we today call our life, our societies and our world which all are not true because we have created it in the image of God, not in co-creation with God so it is void of the full truth and connection.

  23. “I came to the realisation that life isn’t just about me but it is about encompassing everything and everyone.” This has been a turning point for me Chan, as I had made my life about me first in many ways. But what Serge Benhayon has shown so many is that when we do anything, when we make it about everyone, ie even cleaning our teeth ‘for everyone’, we start to understand the implications of what this means and the repsonsiblity we therefore have to take care of how we do absolutely anything and everything.

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