For the past 4 plus years I have been attending Universal Medicine courses, presentations and workshops, followed by my first retreat at Lennox Heads in 2015. Every single experience has been absolutely amazing. Each time I come away feeling clarity, love, purpose and truth, and feeling deeply supported.
Prior to Universal Medicine I was coping with life, not fully living in joy or in harmony with my body or my family. I had dealt with sexual, physical, verbal and mental abuse throughout my childhood. Reflecting back, I realised that the people I loved dearly have been the ones who attacked me the most.
What really hurt deep was not what was physically done to me but seeing clearly that the people who chose to abuse me were simply very hurt and choosing to vent it out on others. The sadness for me was seeing that they chose to suppress love in order to attack and defend.
I too then chose to reduce my immense love and joy as a form of protection so I didn’t have to feel the pain. I simply didn’t feel safe to be shining with joy and love, so I deliberately chose to tone it down. From about 7 years old I decided that this was the safest way to function through life – to not be too joyful in case I get attacked. This was my false sense of security and investment to make life about keeping me safe.
My deliberate choice to not be too joyful in case something horrible might happen was a contracted way to live. I thought if I made myself small by holding myself back it would not attract too much attention, therefore, I felt safe. This was what I had chosen pretty much my whole life.
Through attending courses, presentations and workshops at Universal Medicine I was able to see that with this false sense of security I was not truly living. With my fear of fully living my life and being joyful, I was capping myself so that I couldn’t see any possibilities that were out there waiting for me to explore, to express and to share.
I came to the realisation that life isn’t just about me but it is about encompassing everything and everyone.
I came to understand and appreciate that we are all deeply connected and how protection is a contracted way to live that is completely false. The truth about my choices was exposed and this was such a healing to understand and to heal what was not loving.
From years of exposing what was not love and starting to choose love again, I have experienced something I have never thought was possible – an amazing expansion. During Sacred Esoteric Healing Level 5 I felt the loving energy of a full house of people. It was incredible… out of this world. During a break I lay down on a massage table, closed my eyes and felt the energy in the room. I felt I was finally home with my family, even though I only knew a small percentage of the people there. I felt Love was emanating from within and I could feel it all round me; I could feel the love in everyone’s voices and the entire hall. I thanked God with appreciation in my heart for constellating me to be there in the hall to experience this amazing power of love that has always been there for me to access.
For the first time in my life I felt completely safe to truly allow my love and joy to shine, to be who I am and to not hold back expressing the joy I felt.
I felt deeply connected to me, to my body, to everyone, everything and to God. The love I felt for humanity was so absolute, so full and expanded. There are no words to capture what I had experienced, simply deep appreciation for everyone.
A huge massive thank you to everyone who attended Sacred Esoteric Healing Level 5 for expressing love and for creating the space for me to trust and to love again. Now that I have experienced what true connection to everyone and everything is, I know that whenever I feel disconnected I can choose to re-connect to love and to connect to God in an instant. In knowing that He is in me, all round me in every moment, always beside me and in every part of me and in absolutely everything, I can then choose to not hold back my joy but to fully express it with every part of my being, to celebrate brotherhood and return to God.
by Chan Ly