Hidden Treasure and the Illusion of Elders

When we are younger, particularly in the ‘Western world’, we tend to not see the hidden treasures all around in the form of elder people because we are not looking at them. We have been trained by media, TV, sports, music and fashion to pay attention to and follow youth, and to disregard elders as if they are irrelevant and embarrassing reminders of where we are going, that we don’t want to go. So we make the elders invisible.

I observe many elders desperately clinging to youth and not rising to their grace and wisdom. I have found there are many treasures, like the grandfather of a blog commenter I recently read about, who quietly goes about ‘being an elder role model’.

They have learned and accepted that nobody might be looking and benefiting from the wisdom and grace they offer, but they continue to just be who they are, without raising a ruckus to get attention. They also offer infinite patience and understanding, and the great love expressed by allowing others to just be where they are. After all they’ve probably “seen it all and done it all” themselves and understand what’s going on for you.

These are some of the hidden treasures that younger people often miss because they, like most of the elders, are too busy racing around with their heads down in their own concerns. And, in fact, weird though it seems, many younger people are also desperately hanging onto youth. Not in the ‘looking young’ way, but in the ‘playing the kid’ way. That is, hanging onto being irresponsible, reactive against parents and authorities, self-centered, wanting to do their own fun thing without having to consider others, avoiding commitment to relationships, work and life, all driven by the fear that if they step up into responsibility and commitment, life will become ‘restrictive, dull and boring’ (which can only be true if you make it so). I know people in their twenties and thirties who still live like this, and even people middle aged and older than me who still live like this!

I observe that we have ‘teenage’ energy and mindset spread throughout the whole population, regardless of age. In truth, as many people have lately been pointing out in blog comments, we can have elder energy at any age.

Hmm… it would be interesting to do a detective job on why we at any age choose ‘childish’ irresponsibility over the elder wisdom and grace that is available to all, and is even present in babies and young children.

I’m not a mother, by choice. I have done 16 years of part-time step-mothering but was, and am still, not a mother, so when I interact with children it is not in ‘mother’ energy or “I’m an adult and you’re just a kid” energy. It’s wonderful!! I get to be me, let them be them, and see and feel them as equals with as much wisdom and understanding as I have just with a little less training in the specifics of this particular time on the Earth. I enjoy lots of awesome ‘eye to eye, heart to heart’ moments of silent, ageless, mutually-conscious understanding with little ones. The physical age of our bodies means nothing in that context.

Adding the factor of reincarnation makes a huge difference to relationships – to know that the 8 year-old girl you’re chatting and painting pictures with has been (many times over) all genders, all ages, many societal roles and a wide range of occupations, and may have even been your own grandfather in some life or other! This awareness imparts an equality that can be felt and sensed by the child, who then is free to express their elder wisdom and grace, which is part of who they have always been.

When adults arrogantly treat children like ‘kids’, lesser beings who ‘don’t know as much’ and have to be constantly told, it suppresses the equality of relationship and the children then play out what you expect them to be: irresponsible, lesser and trivial.

Without blaming, because we’ve all been a party to and entrapped by the same belief, this is a deep, insidious form of training to be NOT ONLY not themselves, but also not in the wisdom and grace of elder energy that is innately within all children, as in everyone.

If it were not for Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon, I may have continued ignoring the factor of reincarnation as being of great relevance in our lives and relationships. It would have remained at best a curiosity of nature in the 95% of the universe that our scientists currently admit they have no access to, and at worst, a fable that has no validity or value to our life. But seeing it in the whole context makes sense of a great many mysteries of human experience and psychology, and makes a fruitful foundation for the understanding and correction of interactions, attitudes, behaviour and purpose.

Let’s give ourselves and all humanity a big gift by changing the way we relate to our children and our elder people, offering respect and equality right from the get-go.

Thus children can grow up in their elder energy and never have to lose it and painfully re-find it as so many of us current older adults have had to do. Then our children will naturally have respect and appreciation for all the phases of life, and not end up trapped in ‘youth culture’. And our older people can continue to respect themselves and be respected by others for who they truly are without feeling pressured to be anything else, as some most beautifully live now.

Inspired by the comments of Gill Randall, Helen Simkins, Rebecca Briant & Lucinda G on Being an Elder Role Model

by Dianne Trussell, BSc Hons, Goonellabah, NSW, Australia

Further Reading:
Our Lineage
Not the ‘unusual’
Reincarnation: Does Everything Start and End?

1,256 thoughts on “Hidden Treasure and the Illusion of Elders

  1. I saw Betty Boothroyd’s speech in the House of Lords the other day on Brexit. Here is one public elder who has claimed her wisdom. She was a joy to observe as her warmth and common sense approach was inspiring.

  2. ‘hanging onto being irresponsible, reactive against parents and authorities, self-centered, wanting to do their own fun thing without having to consider others, avoiding commitment to relationships, work and life, all driven by the fear that if they step up into responsibility and commitment, ‘ once this would have been very descriptive of me. Indeed, it sometimes is but I now can’t ignore how at odds it is with brotherhood, love and harmony. I know it’s never worth pursuing, no matter how enticing being irresponsible seems.

  3. Thank you Dianne, and it is also extremely important that when we are in the Passing-Over we can have a remembrance celebration of life, while they are still with us and this is setting an absolutely True foundation for them to come back to in there next incarnation. As we re-learn to appreciate a person and what they bring in each incarnation as a celebration of life and not being focused on dying and the death process then this is creating the space for them to pass-over in the most Loving way possible and this is for everyone involved. So it is much simpler to have tears of Joy and share Lovingly with all who attend so it is a True celebration of someone’s life. As a True celebration is nothing like the party type atmosphere we have at a ‘wake’ so as a society we need to wake up and be shaken out of our comfort that we have been emotionally attuned to. So we can stand up and treat everyone at every stage of life as an equal and the ensuing Love and appreciation that is an integral part of a celebration held in Truth.

  4. A gorgeous blog. I loved reading this today. It makes me remember that we are not just bodies, somebody or any body or even nobody we are so much more..and we span many eras and many lifetimes and can be the magnificence of all of that in this life.

  5. Appreciating all the phases of life and the phase of life we are in is super important. It allows us to learn as much as we can about ourselves and whats around us and how we can traverse these times. We do have a choice in how we move through these times.

  6. Understanding how reincarnation works takes away funerals and the baby stages of life that we all have been delivered into. Then taking us down a true path by watching children grow without the usual ‘they don’t know better,’ when they do! as this is especially true when they are treated as equals from day one.

    1. This understanding has the capacity to change the way we parent forever. To honour a child in their natural wisdom supports for an equal relationship. The confirmation a child receives in turn because of this supports them to be independent and appreciative and trusting of their own essence – a far cry from the insecurity, jealousy and comparison we breed by communicating that all children are lesser.

      1. It is insidious and inconceivable when you have seen a child being treated as an equal to consider another lesser, as it is at best a judgmental approach to life that becomes a disconnection for all concerned. So as you have shared Michelle, supporting and parenting our youth will change not only parenting but also the way we approach teaching.

      2. It is inconceivable to me too how we manage to raise children, generation after generation, into adults who feel insecurities, disempowerment, lacking in self-worth etc., whilst pretending all the while on the surface that everything is ok. If we were to get every adult on the planet expressing honestly about what they feel about themselves, we could no longer pretend that we have everything sewn up. We have to start looking at how we are raising our children and give them access to articulating how they are feeling, what they are feeling and how to express it naturally as equals. Being treated as an equal offer a sense of self, it offers empowerment, it offers a settlement in the body that needs no further confirmation. Our children also need to see from adults that we experience life in the same way – transparency we do not yet collectively offer them. We need to be honest with them. We are not perfect, we get good days and bad days. On our bad days, it is ok to show our children we are feeling fragile and vulnerable, we can invite their support in just as they invite ours. This is what equality is about. When I am fragile, my children offer me so much support naturally – I wouldn’t countenance it any other way. They respond to others at school in need of support in the same way; naturally and unquestioningly with joy. Our bottom line at home and at school needs to be raised.

      3. Absolutely Michelle, our whole approach to the way we are living needs to be reviewed, as you have shared those that are treated as equals are now sharing the truth of what that looks like back to us.

  7. It is not generally considered that older people have anything that is of particular worth purely because of their age. It would be good to see a generation of older people who show that there is a separate form of wisdom that is in some way coupled with physical age, if such a wisdom exists.

    1. And the carry over into the next life or incarnation if we treat the elderly as if they are full of wisdom and as equals, shall be shown in the reflection of that baby, especially when it has not been imposed upon and is allowed to fully appreciate the Love of its essence.

    2. Our failure in learning from previous generations could be part of the reason why we tend to repeat the same mistakes over and over again. Generation after generation. If we truly learned from those who have been at war, we would never do that again. But due to our failure to learn from our elders, the same path presents itself. Even more so though.

    3. When we can connect to the essence – the being in the body – regardless of how old that body is then we have the key to that worth and wisdom from toddler to octogenarian.

  8. I love what you are saying here Dianne about how kids do not have to lose their elder energy as they grow up if they are treated as equals from the beginning of their life.

  9. When shared, we can learn much wisdom from the experiences of others – equally from their challenges, mistakes and masteries.

  10. There is so much wisdom in every child, and so much in our elders, yet the wisdom of both groups is constantly overlooked by those in between who think they know it all, and in the process miss out on so much. If only we came back to a society where we honour each phase of our lives as equal to all others, respecting the wisdom of the young and the old, maybe then the world would not be in the mess it currently is in.

  11. ‘When adults arrogantly treat children like ‘kids’, lesser beings who ‘don’t know as much’ and have to be constantly told, it suppresses the equality of relationship and the children then play out what you expect them to be: irresponsible, lesser and trivial.’ This is so true. Working in a children’s hospice shop I am witness to this “arrogant” way of being with children. Of course the adults I see behaving in this way – and it is not only parents – would probably not accept that they are behaving in an out of order way and there would probably be lots of justifications for it. I can find myself changing the tone of my voice sometimes when talking to children or pets….this comes as quite a shock but at least I can catch it as soon as I hear it and feel it and come back to myself and speak from my heart without any trimmings. The more we can be ourselves without changing for the person in front of us- whatever the age – the more truth and love there will be in the world.

  12. There is beauty in every age and the qualities of each age are different, yet have been hugely misinterpreted and bastardised. Because the teenage years as we know them with rebellion, dismissiveness and carelessness is not the true quality of a teenager. The same goes for the student period in the late teens and early twenties. This is often made about partying and being irresponsible as much as you can get by, instead of a period of making a foundation for the rest of life, preparing for a profession, family, home etc. And the same for the older ages.

  13. I so loved re-reading this Dianne, there is so much wisdom in what you share about us honouring children with the wisdom inside them, allowing them to simply be themselves. The world needs to read and understand what you say, it seems a bit topsy turvy sometimes where there are many elderly in childish irresponsibility and many children now holding their wisdom. Whatever age we are, we can always learn and reclaim our true wisdom within.

  14. An awesome blog asking us to celebrate our elders and appreciate the energy they bring as well as our younger generation and to consider reincarnation. What came to me reading this was a moment I really appreciated the other day on a video call with a group of people and one women, and elder, that made my heart melt with her gentle way and manner and how she was expressing. I appreciated her to be the gold that she was. What also came to be while reading is that not every elder is patient and understanding ‘patience and understanding, and the great love expressed by allowing others to just be where they are.’ I know i have met some that definitely have not been and for me this highlights our lived life and the (all of the them) choices we have made because of course this will have an affect or impact on how we are when in our elder years. If we still carry hurt, blame, resentment, bitterness, anger (and this can sometimes be from childhood!!) than how on earth as we suddenly going to be compassionate, patient and understanding with others in our elder years? So of course, how we live and our choices, as Universal Medicine present, have an impact on everything including how we are when we are older.

  15. This article reflects how you cannot stereotype any age group. I have seen elders behave like a child in a tantrum, and children with depth and wisdom. When we connect inwardly, the wisdom of the ages is there for us all no matter what our age.

  16. “and at worst, a fable that has no validity or value to our life” – this is reductionism at its most evil. To reduce our lives to one single one, keeps us in that ‘single use/throw away’ mentality and reduces the chance of people taking responsibility for their lives which the world so desperately needs.

  17. Dianne a great sharing as there is so much wisdom and amazing insights in the elderly that is very often forgotten and overlooked, perhaps because in the past it was ‘age’ that meant everything rather than true wisdom. A child can come out with amazing wisdom as can some 80 years their senior. What if we approach life not from age but from holding each person equal in their ability to connect with and share the wisdom they have. then no one is discounted.

  18. I love spending time with the six-year-olds at my local primary school. They just say it as it is and that’s that. Not worrying if they are being polite or nice, just saying what they feel at the time. And when you talk to them sensibly they do understand and will tell you straight.

    1. Julie I have the same experience with seven year olds at a school where I volunteer, I am constantly inspired by their openness and honesty in ‘telling it as it is’. And it is so true, when I speak with them as I would with an adult they, for the most part feel the equality in our connection and respond accordingly.

  19. Our lives become far richer when we let go of pictures and open up to connecting to everyone that crosses our lives, regardless of how similar, or different, they are to us. Every person has something different that they reflect back to us, and that we can learn from.

  20. Children can often so fight going to sleep at bedtime, I know I did. And I have found that I am still unravelling this as a 48 year old adult. Sometimes I am so tired but still fight going to sleep at bedtimes. It would be wise to step into our elder wisdom as a child so we do not fight it so much in our elder years.

  21. This is something that I love about true elders – the way that, by experience and hence wisdom, they are able to gaze upon us with much understanding and grace as we younger ones often run around in circles of our own making.

  22. Kids behave very differently when you treat them as equal in their responsibility, I definitely agree it would be a great model in the world if we taught and walked responisibility from young rather than grapple to discover it in our late teens or sometimes go our whole lives without really claiming it.

  23. When you see the elderly, they can walk in a way that touches sympathy in us which basically gives an attitude that they are less.
    It is very good to realise how much lived experience they have from which we can learn.

  24. The elderly have a well of wisdom they can connect to. In conversation with them we have an opportunity to connect, learn and bring that out in them. It is a shame that so many elderly people are not confident in themselves, they put themselves down etc. because perhaps if this wasn’t the case the young would not be so lost looking for role models through media.

  25. Great wisdom can pour through anyone, at anytime. What I most appreciate about connecting to people who are different ages to me is their different experiences of life, and what they’ve learned and are continuing to learn. This is how we evolve, by connecting to others and learning from their reflection – and offering ours to others.

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