Could We Be THE One?

Before coming to the teachings of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, I had always considered love to be something reserved for those ‘special’ few in my life.

It wasn’t just a normal way of being with everyone but something that needed time, consistency and a track record of trust. Take away that trust and the love would seemingly dry up like a puddle in the sun.

This was how I lived in my relationships: I’d ride the ‘connected’ times for all they were worth, all the while preparing myself for the inevitable hurt and disconnection that would come.

This would play out in its various forms of protection – holding back, distancing, or even complete retreat from the other person.

But that was love, right? Everything in the culture around me had confirmed up until that point the belief that love hurts; that you can have it and lose it and it is finite.

Serge Benhayon was the first person to present love to me as an energy you embody (from within yourself) that can only develop from a foundation of self-love and care.

As far as I was aware, love was something you went in search of giving and receiving, not something you chose to be. 

Looking back over my relationships, I can clearly see how this conditional version of love set me up to feel ‘needy’ of others and dis-empowered in life. Things would feel great when I was getting the attention, acceptance and recognition I was seeking, but when it inevitably dried up, I was faced with the saddening reality of how I truly felt about myself – that I never felt quite good enough no matter how much I seemingly ‘succeeded’ in life.

Through the teachings of Serge Benhayon, I’ve come to understand that the only way off this roller coaster of conditional love is full acceptance of the responsibility that nobody else can do the job of loving me, for me, and that with commitment to myself, it is possible to feel loved and supported, no matter what’s happening in my life.

This is a far cry from the relationship I once had with myself, the world and everyone around me!

Understanding this simple truth that I AM already love and that this is at the core of every single person, has helped me to see through the layers of hurt and protection that get in the way of this love being felt and expressed.

These layers of the ‘what isn’t’ love, such as the hurt of not feeling like we are good enough, feeling rejected, abandoned or not recognised, can seem overwhelming, yet in reality they’re all minute in comparison to the amazingness of who we truly are.

The art, as I’m gradually learning, is where we choose to put our attention: on the ‘what is’ – Love; or the ‘what is not’ –everything else.

When we confirm and appreciate ourselves for who we are, rather than for what we do, such as having an innate lightness or joy, we call for more of that quality to be lived and expressed, leaving less space for the negative self-talk that can dominate our thoughts and ways of being.

Could it be that this type of loving relationship with ourselves, one of full acceptance and appreciation, is THE one we’ve all been searching for? And is it possible that any romantic quest for the Mr or Mrs Right actually takes us away from knowing this true love? 

Perhaps it’s time to bring our focus to the one staring back at us in the mirror – the ONE who will be with us in every moment of every day, waiting for us to stop and finally see who we truly are – pure, all-encompassing and beholding LOVE.

By Alison Coleman

Further Reading:
Self-love vs self-loathing
Before and After My Self Love Program – Forever Unfolding the Real Me
To honour another you need to love yourself

1,170 thoughts on “Could We Be THE One?

  1. We are most definitely the ‘one’, no longer do we give our power away to others when we know and claim we are the ‘one’. Some may shy away from being the ‘one’ as it holds a bigger responsibility to reflect this truth.

  2. ‘The art, as I’m gradually learning, is where we choose to put our attention: on the ‘what is’ – Love; or the ‘what is not’ –everything else.’ A true art, always having our eyes on the ‘what is not’ is deceiving, as having our eyes or actually our whole body on ‘the what is’, confirms what we know that we are already everything (and more)

  3. This pattern of highs and lows in relationships is part of what keeps us in dysfunctional relationships for so long – we put up with the lows, because the highs – the acceptance and recognition – feel so good when we get them that it keeps us in it. But it’s an unsustainable and ultimately miserable way of being in relationships with others – i.e. totally at the mercy of another’s mood, of another’s decision to be loving towards us, or not. Eventually we learn that nothing can compensate for the love that we can give to ourselves, and that can only come from a constant saying yes to aligning to that love that are and that we all hold within us.

  4. So interesting that we agree to buy a ticket on the roller coaster of life, investing our time and energy into the ups, knowing that there will be downs. But what occurs to me is that a) why should life always go smoothly… who says that is the goal? In fact, if it were to go smoothly all the time then where would be the growth, the shifts, the changes that are needed to expand? And b) if we develop a strong inner feeling of ourselves and our love that is independent of the ever-changing world around us. That can be developed into a super strong unshakeable foundation from which to observe the rest of the world.

  5. How we are with ourselves And our body is what we bring into a relationship. If we do not connect And love ourselves truly we can not offer true Connection with others either.

  6. Yes everyONE is the ONE. Time to stop trying to be Mr and Mrs Right and become the Mr and Mrs Truth and Love we all already are.

  7. It is a huge shift away from a lifetimes patterning to seek love from outside of yourself. It makes no sense that we are born love and move further away from that state every day yet are hell bent on continuing down the path of finding ‘the one’. It is only through reconnecting, learning to truly love ourselves on a daily basis that we can shift this insidious outward looking way of living.

    1. One day we will all wake up and remember we are the one and then will no longer be lost or won – but gloriously one.

  8. How many songs are written about this – “that love hurts; that you can have it and lose it and it is finite” – just cementing this belief in for humanity that this is what love is. When this belief could not be further from the truth. Thank God for Michael Benhayon of Glorious Music who is bringing into the world music that is about the truth of love, that it is there for each and everyone of us, it lives within us, and is up to us to live it for ourselves.

  9. We are all the one as we all come from the same source and each one of us reflect something different and we need every reflection to make the all.

    1. Like you need all the colours to make up the rainbow, or all the components to make up an engine. Even the smallest screw not doing its job has the potential to stop the whole engine.

    1. And in this moving a new true way may feel familiar but awkward compared to the ill movements of the past. It takes a willingness and knowing if truth to make those necessary corrections.

  10. One of the biggest lies that society throws at us: that love is only exclusive to a couple of people, where the reality of our nature is that we radiate love in all directions. You just have to put the light on and take the cap off.

    1. Like that ‘put the light on and take the cap off’ this is very true, nothing needs to be done rather to be and emanate.

    1. I realised walking today how we absolutely create our issues with God as God has no issues with us. It is a crazy, crazy game of delay we play.

  11. The relationship with ourselves is absolutely the one we have been waiting for. It’s the ultimate relationship that allows all relationship to be more. The deeper we can surrender to all the love we are, the deeper we surrender to all the relationships we have.

  12. It’s interesting to reflect on if there is ever a true justification for ‘reserving love’ and if we’re reserving love what is it that we’re expressing instead… It’s like we think there is only a certain amount of love that we have to ‘give’ rather than seeing it as something that comes through us naturally when we’re in connection with our essence.

  13. The revelations about true love presented here are so simple and common sense, yet they are the opposite of what we are led to believe. I also believed that love was only for certain special people, and it was found in another. It’s so much simpler and very empowering to know that its inside each of us, an energy that is at our core, rather than a finite resource that we have to compete for.

  14. What a brilliant sharing Alison, absolutely awesome it makes soooo much sense that the key is to deepen your love with yourself.

  15. I too have discovered through the teachings of Serge Benhayon and my own Livingness that Love is something we ALL already ARE. Not even something we need to choose to be – we simply are. All we have to do is stop choosing to be or what you could call aligning to all that is not love.

    1. If we have been aligning to all that is not love for a long time then there can be a process of cleaning up, reimprinting and healing our hurts – but knowing that we are already everything is such a wonderful and true place to start to return from!

  16. true Alison, we are the only ones that can love us, then the more we love ourselves the more we are able to let the love of others in.

  17. I also see, as you mention mirrors here, that others can mirror back to me the love that I innately am, and that I too can reflect that innate love back to them. This is very beautiful and magnifying, like seeing a mirror reflect another mirror infinitely into the distance – something that always fascinated me as a child.

  18. “As far as I was aware, love was something you went in search of giving and receiving, not something you chose to be.” This has been a total game changer for me too, to come to appreciate myself and the love that I am and bring to the world innately, as is there within us all.

  19. Understanding that we are here to ‘be love’ not to seek it is a grand turning point in our lives. Oneness is in the heart of us all just waiting to be rediscovered.

  20. I really appreciate what you’ve presented here Alison, the ideal of that romantic quest to find Mr. or Mrs. Right who are going to solve all our problems is so common in movies and just generally as well! And I can see how if we buy into that we are distracting ourselves from truly building love in our life through the way that we live in each moment, with ourselves and with everyone else as well…

  21. Alison, this is very true; ‘Everything in the culture around me had confirmed up until that point the belief that love hurts; that you can have it and lose it and it is finite.’ Every romantic movie and books seems to confirm this. It has been very beautiful attending Universal Medicine presentations and learning that we can love ourselves and that we do not need to be reliant on love from outside of ourselves.

    1. Yeah that story is rubbish, disempowering and is not true. It’s fascinating that this is what we have chosen to surround ourselves with, lies and fiction rather than love and truth. Such a set up. But once you see it like you have shared, it is so obvious in its manipulation, its game over.

  22. I loved this sentence ‘The art, as I’m gradually learning, is where we choose to put our attention: on the ‘what is’ – Love; or the ‘what is not’ –everything else.’ It reminded me of our responsibility to always choose love first.

  23. Could we be the one? Could we be the one who inspires our neighbour, co-worker, son, daughter, mother, father, brother, friend, or the person on the street to be who they truly are? Could we be the one that’s a bit different and shows those around us that there is another way? Could each and every single one of us be the one?

  24. “Understanding this simple truth that I AM already love and that this is at the core of every single person, has helped me to see through the layers of hurt and protection that get in the way of this love being felt and expressed.” So so true Alison when we truly know we are love there is no hurt that can play out, it all melts away when we express who we truly are.

  25. There is no such thing as being alone when we live in connection to our love within. For in that moment we are in union with all that is Divine, as such with God and there is no greater presence to be with, than with Him.

  26. “Serge Benhayon was the first person to present love to me as an energy you embody (from within yourself) that can only develop from a foundation of self-love and care. ”
    I had the same experience with Serge Benhayon, he was the first person I met who knew what the word love meant.

  27. I’ve loved what you have shared here Alison, searching for love elsewhere to complete us when it is within us all.
    Like yourself I am gradually learning too to bring what I am, build the foundation of what I am and what is not and I can reflect this to others to build theirs if they so wish.

  28. ‘As far as I was aware, love was something you went in search of giving and receiving, not something you chose to be. ‘ This is such a great point that many of us , if not all, have been ensconced in. It wasn’t until Serge Benhayon said to me ‘all you have to do is Be Love’ that the penny dropped and I realised how simple it is. Then I could begin to unravel and understand all that was not love in my life. Still in progress, I am experiencing how love is an amazing ever deepening expansion that knows no bounds.

  29. We can only have negative self talks when we do not deeply love ourselves. Otherwise it would be impossible and not exist.

  30. We can hold on and cherish our hurts, not feeling good enough, not recognised, feeling rejected and so on, but with that we only are holding back the love that already lives within and can be lived without any effort if we choose to live so.

  31. ‘The art, as I’m gradually learning, is where we choose to put our attention: on the ‘what is’ – Love; or the ‘what is not’ – everything else.’ I’m finding that appreciation helps this process hugely as it is absolute and truthful.

  32. I must admit that I always thought that there would be a “one” who came to save the world but I now realise that that was a falsehood sold to me and in fact we all are the one’s in that we all are responsible for saving ourselves.

    1. Like all lies it is a bastardisation of a Truth because there is a one who comes to save us and it is you Doug, and me and all of us – we all “save” ourselves from ourselves. We are all the one and we are all one!

      1. It is true, we have all been lied to in so many ways. Even the way that truth has been sold to us is a lie. Time to bring back what truth really is and bury the eons old lies.

  33. Not claiming that we are the One does not serve anyone; in fact it is a complete hindrance to what we are here to do. We are all the One so there are no favourites.

  34. Whenever we put our focus outside of us – we set ourselves up to fail, as we reject our inner-side being ness that is who we are and move with everyday. Could it be that by acknowledging our inside, our truth – it makes us expand, bigger and hence all the manners and ways of living away from that will be exposed? And need an update? Yes, hence it is great to actually allow the what is truly new and eliminate the dirt that is polluting us, that has never worked.

  35. ‘The art, as I’m gradually learning, is where we choose to put our attention: on the ‘what is’ – Love; or the ‘what is not’ –everything else’. And wow, what an art to learn. This quote lived has changed the very foundation of everything I do. How amazing this is when you start to live it you see how it was there to live the whole time, we just chose the other direction.

  36. ‘As far as I was aware, love was something you went in search of giving and receiving, not something you chose to be.’ Yes Alison, this is a very different place to be and completely re-writes what we think Love is.

  37. The person looking back at us in the mirror is the only person with us in every moment. Terefore, it is best to build a relationship with ourselves first because then we know who we are as we look out from our eyes to others.

    1. So true Lucy, we are for ourselves the first and foremost, who have to come to terms with the love that we already are before we can share this love with with the world.

    2. The more deeply we are connected to ourselves the less we look out, for our eyes actually receive.

  38. For years I have taught that being the “one” was some sort of big deal and the reason why I would not accept myself as the “one”. More recently I have come to know that it is our responsibility to be the “one”, as each of us so can and do reflect something different to each other.

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