Could We Be THE One?

Before coming to the teachings of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine, I had always considered love to be something reserved for those ‘special’ few in my life.

It wasn’t just a normal way of being with everyone but something that needed time, consistency and a track record of trust. Take away that trust and the love would seemingly dry up like a puddle in the sun.

This was how I lived in my relationships: I’d ride the ‘connected’ times for all they were worth, all the while preparing myself for the inevitable hurt and disconnection that would come.

This would play out in its various forms of protection – holding back, distancing, or even complete retreat from the other person.

But that was love, right? Everything in the culture around me had confirmed up until that point the belief that love hurts; that you can have it and lose it and it is finite.

Serge Benhayon was the first person to present love to me as an energy you embody (from within yourself) that can only develop from a foundation of self-love and care.

As far as I was aware, love was something you went in search of giving and receiving, not something you chose to be. 

Looking back over my relationships, I can clearly see how this conditional version of love set me up to feel ‘needy’ of others and dis-empowered in life. Things would feel great when I was getting the attention, acceptance and recognition I was seeking, but when it inevitably dried up, I was faced with the saddening reality of how I truly felt about myself – that I never felt quite good enough no matter how much I seemingly ‘succeeded’ in life.

Through the teachings of Serge Benhayon, I’ve come to understand that the only way off this roller coaster of conditional love is full acceptance of the responsibility that nobody else can do the job of loving me, for me, and that with commitment to myself, it is possible to feel loved and supported, no matter what’s happening in my life.

This is a far cry from the relationship I once had with myself, the world and everyone around me!

Understanding this simple truth that I AM already love and that this is at the core of every single person, has helped me to see through the layers of hurt and protection that get in the way of this love being felt and expressed.

These layers of the ‘what isn’t’ love, such as the hurt of not feeling like we are good enough, feeling rejected, abandoned or not recognised, can seem overwhelming, yet in reality they’re all minute in comparison to the amazingness of who we truly are.

The art, as I’m gradually learning, is where we choose to put our attention: on the ‘what is’ – Love; or the ‘what is not’ –everything else.

When we confirm and appreciate ourselves for who we are, rather than for what we do, such as having an innate lightness or joy, we call for more of that quality to be lived and expressed, leaving less space for the negative self-talk that can dominate our thoughts and ways of being.

Could it be that this type of loving relationship with ourselves, one of full acceptance and appreciation, is THE one we’ve all been searching for? And is it possible that any romantic quest for the Mr or Mrs Right actually takes us away from knowing this true love? 

Perhaps it’s time to bring our focus to the one staring back at us in the mirror – the ONE who will be with us in every moment of every day, waiting for us to stop and finally see who we truly are – pure, all-encompassing and beholding LOVE.

By Alison Coleman

Further Reading:
Self-love vs self-loathing
Before and After My Self Love Program – Forever Unfolding the Real Me
To honour another you need to love yourself

1,193 thoughts on “Could We Be THE One?

  1. I remember at a Women’s group us discussing what love was and I shared I knew I was connected when I could feel a warmth in my feet. A person beside me was so relieved as she thought I was going to say the usual; when I hold my child’s or partner’s hand etc., something to do with another but it most certainly is to do with ourselves and how our bodies feel in connection to the whole universe.

  2. Supporting me to be me, connecting to my own love, for me to be love, is such a foreign way of being in this world which is all about trying to find someone to love us, to make us feel worthy, when the truth is we are responsible for loving ourselves, how amazingly beautiful is that responsibility.

  3. “Perhaps it’s time to bring our focus to the one staring back at us in the mirror – the ONE who will be with us in every moment of every day, waiting for us to stop and finally see who we truly are – pure, all-encompassing and beholding LOVE.” Love this we spend our lives searching for The One when all the time we are the One, we are the love we have been searching for and that love is right there in the mirror being reflected back to us. How blind are we when it comes to love?

  4. I love what you are saying here about how love is something that we choose to be. Knowing this, we can never complain about not having love in our life, because we can bring the love that we crave.

  5. The love in our lives is dependent on the love we are willing to express and the quality of that expression comes from the relationship we have with ourselves and with God.

  6. I had a Jewish friend and his experience was that some people were special, born special so the idea that anybody can be without limitations was a surprise for him.

  7. This made me smile when I think ‘I am Mr Right’! Its all there, not in the achievements, the quantity of what I do, but in the quality that I can feel super steady in me. Its always there, so how much do I value, appreciate, and treasure that? (Cause I’ve tried the dependent model, looking to the outside for fulfillment, and it’s an exhausting and impossible task to fulfill).

  8. We most definitely are the ones that are beholders of love and through our connection to our innermost we realise that nothing can compare to this superlative quality that represents the essence of us all.

  9. Looking back I can honestly say that I did not truly love anyone I was in so much protection, I was always waiting for something to go wrong. And I feel this is because we have set up our society to believe that love cannot last which is the complete opposite of the truth of true love the love of God. It is always there it is we who reject this love and suffer the consequences.

    1. Mary, this makes sense. To me it was a revelation that there is much more to love than I realised and this has opened doors to a very different way of living and connecting and relating and loving others as well.

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