I recently attended a Livingness 1 Workshop presented by Serge Benhayon, founder of Universal Medicine. I have attended this and other workshops previously and, whilst each one has held an abundance of light bulb moments, the clarity and understanding in me from this particular one has been exceptionally profound.
I realised that the hurts I’ve absorbed through false beliefs of my ‘failings’ as a woman, mother, wife, friend, daughter, sister, employee and neighbour, are how I have encased myself in a seemingly impenetrable suit of armour, burying my natural essence underneath. These hurts, I have further come to understand, have been nothing more than excuses to justify not living in the fullness of this Essence.
Our Essence, you see, is the love we all seek, searching all corners of the globe, stuck in the belief that it’s ‘out there’: in some hidden valley, on top of a mountain, in the deepest ocean, or with a partner, having children, a new body at the gym, a better house or car, a new pair of shoes, that ‘must have’ dress, or chocolate bar after chocolate bar. When all this fails to fulfil, we have turned our quest to outer space, sure that it’s ‘out there’, as deep, deep down, we all know it’s somewhere.
But it isn’t ‘out there’ – it’s inside us, solidly, continuously, bigger and grander than anything this world has to offer. Take the most amazing sunset/sunrise you have ever seen, the most delicious food you have ever eaten, the joy felt looking into a new love’s eyes, the miracle of childbirth or simply the joy of a child and multiply it by a gazillion… that is our esoteric Essence.
In my experience, the steps to let go of this searching and allow what is inside to flourish have begun with my relationship with myself. This is not something that I have suddenly ‘got’ and am now sitting pretty. This is my life on a daily basis, how I am with myself in each and every moment. It’s about the choices I make when I get out of bed in the morning and how I place my feet on the floor; when I feel what to eat instead of eating what I feel, when I choose what to wear based on what will support the gorgeousness of me and when I connect with everyone, not from my hurts but from my Essence.
Being in a deeply loving, nurturing and honest relationship with myself allows for a deeply loving, nurturing and honest relationship with everyone else.
As I went back to work yesterday, full of the knowing of my Essence and the beauty of connecting with people in this way, it wasn’t long before I bought into someone’s pain and allowed it to trigger my own. Almost immediately I began thinking of foods I could eat (mainly the sugary or salty kind) that would allow me to block out the feeling of yuckiness that had invaded my body as I bought into the “it’s all too hard” mentality.
But you know what? It isn’t! The commitment to drugs, alcohol, overeating, drinking caffeine, lack of exercise, judgment, blame, lack of self-worth, jealousy and comparison, with which I have excelled in my life, I now dedicate that same commitment to living every day from my innermost.
Inspired by Serge Benhayon, Natalie Benhayon, Michael Benhayon and Curtis Benhayon as well as other Universal Medicine Practitioners, students and friends, I have discovered more of what innately lives inside me. It has always been and continues to be here for me to choose it each second of my unfolding day.
There is no Pollyanna approach here, simply the reality of the truth as presented by Serge Benhayon.
By Julie Ferguson, Brisbane, Complementary-to-Medicine Practitioner
Related Reading:
We are not our Hurts
True Relationships – Being Love First, not Demanding it from Others
The Power of Healing Our Hurts
The Truth about Universal Medicine 
Observing life, and not absorbing life is an important lesson to learn.
Julie what you have shared is the experience of many people
“I realised that the hurts I’ve absorbed through false beliefs of my ‘failings’ as a woman, mother, wife, friend, daughter, sister, employee and neighbour, are how I have encased myself in a seemingly impenetrable suit of armour, burying my natural essence underneath. These hurts, I have further come to understand, have been nothing more than excuses to justify not living in the fullness of this Essence.”
I too have encased myself in a suit of armour of false ideals and beliefs I have believed the lies that were told to me because they came from people I looked up to as not only people of authority but also never believed they would lie? It was not until I met Serge Benhayon and attended the many workshops and retreats that I realized just how much we are lied to which we then use as an excuse not to engage in life.
I had never heard of an inner essence until I met Serge and I have been shown a very different way to live which is far more enriching and personally, I will not go back to my old way of living as I can feel how disconnected I was from all of life in my suit of armour.
Appreciation, knocks comparison, judge-ment and jealousy on the head.
So simple ‘Our Essence, you see is the love we all seek’. And it’s also inspiring that we can turn around the commitment we have to disregard, drugs, alcohol, over-eating etc., to one of love and living from our innermost instead.
We can choose to live from hurts or love. Choose hurts and all we know is misery, no awareness of love. Choose love and the hurts don’t affect us, they are there but they can’t get in.
Yes, it makes a solid foundation to stand on that supports us in moments where we get swept up in a drama or an emotional situation. The foundation catches you and reminds you that you are not, never will be and never have been, alone.
When we consider how dedicated we have been to things that we actually don’t want to do, and consider what would happen if we turned that round to being something we did want to do, the potential is enormous.
I know right. When you put it like that, its like an aha and WHAT moment. The thing is I don’t feel we see that we have been and are dedicated to things we don’t want to do, or the unloving things that we do. Dedicated to eating foods that don’t support us, dedicated to drinking, dedicated to smoking, dedicated to not honouring what we feel etc. It is very crazy and maybe if we see it this way (see the craziness of it) we will be quicker to change it!
We are crazy, we put far too much energy into things that are not loving, or supportive of ourselves; do we ever ask ourselves why is that?
That should really be our normal – you being you and me being me.
Unfortunately we do not live in a normal world. The way we have all set up this society we live in is to crush ourselves. There is this unspoken belief that we cannot be sons of Gods. I know from personal experience that I didn’t feel I was worthy to be a son of God and I know this has come from some former religious doctrine that has wrapped it self around the truth of who I am like cling film. What is unwrapping the cling film is a connection to my soul that I’m starting to feel which is giving me a completely different outlook on life, where I can get a sense of belonging again and not the outcast that this religious doctrine would have me believe. Universal Medicine has been my constant reflection of the confirmation that we are indeed sons of God and I have this growing awareness of this fact within me, thanks to their unwavering support.
All we truly want in life is to be ourselves and be met and loved, and to share our love. Hurts come in all shapes and forms and there’s no disputing how legitimate they can be and feel, yet the essence is actually untouched by it all. Imagine if we were supported to know and stay connected to our essence and to work through any hurts? Instead we have collectively buried the essence and constructed a world to help manage how hurt and disconnected we feel with a smorgasbord of distractions, stimulations, and things to numb, comfort, and dull us. Our focus is entirely away from our essence, and we have magnified all we are not.
Melinda what you have shared is exactly what has happened to us. We have all be distracted away from our essence and there seems to be a deeper meaning to this because when we feel our essence and what we have been missing then we realise that we have been lied to on so many different levels, then comes the question why have we been lied to and what is it that doesn’t want us reconnect to our essence?
Thank you Mary, and if we have constructed a false version of ourselves, and it has not come from (and nor is it anything like) our innate essence, then where is the energy sourced from to construct this falseness? And, if so many of us are in this falseness and living from it, then we would have to assume it is highly organised, ie, there is an intelligence backing it. Questions to simply ponder on!
True Melinda, we put our energy into things that do not connect us with our essence, in fact if anything they keep us away from who we are in truth.
Our choices that we make in each and every moment really are the foundation of who we are and this is a great reminder. It is inspiring to read just how much more you love and care for yourself ‘I now dedicate that same commitment to living every day from my innermost.’
There is a completely different perspective on life when we live from the inside out.
It’s interesting that we think we cannot commit to anything and yet we do manage to commit to eating the wrong foods, behaving in a way that is destructive, having disharmony in our relationships – the list is endless.
This is so true Julie, I can remember only focusing on the negatives of daily life when everything seemed so hard. Well it was hard because that was what I felt was my lot in life, for things to be hard. But actually, life doesn’t have to be hard it comes down to the choices we make in each and every moment. Turn the negativity around and life is amazing everyday.
Feeling that love is something outside of us and has to be obtained through the things we do can have us chasing our tail. Love is never absent from our lives because it resides within but it is us who choose to look outside for it.
Why do we all look outside ourselves for love, with people following and looking for love in all the wrong places? We need role models of people who connect to their inner-most, the love inside themselves, and so reflect a true way of living to humanity.
I’m sure it has been said before but if we turned things around and put in the same commitment to taking care of ourselves by developing a deep connection to ourselves every moment in the day instead of the commitment we make to over eat, indulge in alcohol, drugs, music, movies, extreme sports etc., our lives would be completely different .