Where do I Start?

Have you ever in your life looked at something and thought, “Where do I start?” It could have been whilst cleaning, de-cluttering a space, moving house, starting a project, writing an assignment… the list goes on. Many times I have gone into overwhelm (and sometimes still do), asking myself this question and making the task bigger in my mind than it truly is… which if I do that, of course I will not know where to start!

I had a very similar feeling recently, only this was not to do with writing an assignment or de-cluttering, it was to do with what is going on in the world. In a short space of time I had read, seen and signed petitions on various news’ stories of devastating things that are happening to people and animals around the world. Not long after reading and seeing this, in fact during reading and seeing these different news clips, came the familiar feeling of overwhelm – of “Gosh, where do we start?” and I noticed an old pattern of feeling helpless arise. The question then came back to me: when such abuse and devastation is happening within the world, “Where do we (as humanity) start?” and “How on earth do we stop or change the abuse that is happening in the world?”

What I noticed was, when I gave myself space to feel into this a bit more (pulled myself out of being in the overwhelm and observed instead) I did not feel helpless, I did not go into sympathy. Instead I knew the answer. It starts with us. It starts with how we live, how much do we care and love ourselves within our own life, what do we value and tolerate within our life… do we or do we not accept abuse in our own life even on the smallest scale, which could be something as simple as overeating?

This then becomes manageable, tangible and feasible. For if we (every single person in the world) love ourselves so deeply, saying no to abuse, not tolerating abuse, valuing and respecting not only ourselves but every other person, then we would have zero abuse – no wars, no corruption, no lies, no greed, no harm to another or others.

This is possible – we just need to make the start.

So, where do we start?

We start with us.

Continually and forever inspired by the lived way of Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine.

By Vicky Cooke, London

Further Reading:
One Step At a Time – Anything Else is Just Too Tricky!
It’s time for the world to wake from its Sleep
An Unnatural Disaster

692 thoughts on “Where do I Start?

  1. I love your blog, Vicky! Such a great question with such a simple answer. Where do I start? We start with us. Isn’t this where it all starts? And if being totally honest this then brings us to the truth that we end with us too. Us as you say, is not only us as in me and you, but all of humanity. We are where we start and we are where we end as it’s up to us to start living in a way that is inclusive of all humanity and it ends with us when each and every one of us has mastered living in such a way as to be inclusive of all humanity. We start with us to evolve back to us.

  2. We are the answer, it does start and finish with us… humanity. It is how we are with ourselves first which then ripples out to all others, not just on this planet but the entire universe.

  3. If we micro manage our own lives then that in turn macro manages the world because the world is the sum total of all of our choices, it’s literally all of us and all of our choices put together in the one pot. And when we realise this, it’s actually really easy to see how it is literally impossible to fundamentally change anything without first changing ourselves because we are the everything, the everything is made up of us.

  4. “What I noticed was, when I gave myself space to feel into this a bit more (pulled myself out of being in the overwhelm and observed instead) I did not feel helpless, I did not go into sympathy. Instead I knew the answer. There is no space in overwhelm, overwhelm is a state of energetic suffocation which is why our breath gets effected when we go into overwhelm. And as space communicates intelligence then it’s easy to see how it’s impossible to come up with a solution when we are feeling overwhelmed. If we do come up with a solution then it’s often one borne from panic rather than clarity. If we are able to remain connected to our bodies then this helps us to stay in space and the answer to our conundrum is much more likely to become apparent.

  5. Gorgeously simple Vicky, “we start with us”. And for me this has meant and still means a lot of compassion towards myself, dropping the self-critic and judge and placing no blame anywhere.

  6. It really brings it back to personal responsibility, and that this is actually worldly responsibility. By living the love we are and not accepting abuse we clean up the world one person at a time.

  7. We can stand back and judge others for what they are doing (or not doing) which only feeds the mess all the more – or we can step up to the challenge ourselves and as you said Vicky start with us.

  8. In the past if the question – ‘where do I start’ – arose, I would quickly feel overwhelming threatening and the chances are I would go into avoidance mode, making the situation even more complicated. These days I am able to turn the complication into simplicity by stopping, taking an honest look at the situation and then choosing one little thing to begin with, and then another, then another. Any change in my life starts with the very first and simple step I take, as does any change in the world.

  9. When we ask ourselves the question, ‘where do I start’ it already comes with overwhelm. Because when we connect to the purpose we know exactly what to do and when to do it.

  10. Not knowing where to start happens when we procrastinate. It feels awful in our body but when we just focus on making a start without clinging onto overwhelm, every job, big or small becomes an ease and flow.

  11. I love the simplicity yet bold statement. Everything starts with us. We could spend our entire lives making it about others, thinking they will do it when the other are thinking the same about you. It only tales one to break this chain. Are you going to be that One?

  12. Ir is so important to look inward before looking outward because we will find it so hard to cope with what we see outward if we do not have an understanding of ourselves and how we are part of the world we see, yet also part of the future we know we are moving towards.

    1. So very true Lucy – if we don’t have “an understanding of ourselves” and the part we play in this world, we don’t have a starting point for change, either in ourselves or in the world. I am sure that we all would love to heal the world’s problems, today, – I sure would – but I also know that until I make a start on healing mine, I won’t have the understanding and foundation to support anyone else.

  13. It is true that we play so many games to avoid starting, it is not that we don’t know where so much as we are playing games around the when, until it becomes so stale and stagnant that it becomes harder to start, which is of course the aim of the game. But we can just come right back to the honesty, and there it still is.

  14. Absolutely, it starts with us, with ourselves. If everyone on earth “truly minded and attended to their own energetic business” as I like to say to myself, before we even consider looking at what the next person is doing, even if only to a certain degree, the world would be a completely different place. One day everyone will attend fully to their own energetic business such that we no longer need to be here, and then we can leave and all move on to the next loving level and plane of existence together.

  15. The smallest details such as keeping our focus on how we are breathing is always a great place to start, no matter how big the task we have in front of us is.

  16. Thank you Vicky, you have brought simplicity, power, and purpose to one of the most important questions we ask ourselves “how can we can change the world from abuse to love?” We start by becoming the love we innately are and living that for the all. We tend to look for solutions outside of ourselves to do with world problems, but war and abuse starts with people, so it’s on the inside of each person that needs to change by reconnecting to and living from the love within.

  17. It is easy to get overwhelmed when we look at all of the horrific things people do to each other and it’s understandable why we turn a blind eye out of reaction to feeling how much it hurts us. I have done this ever since I can remember but now I’m choosing to know how ugly it can get and to call it out even if it’s to myself.

  18. Whenever I don’t know where to start I come back to my relationship with my body and make sure I am really settled…and then it doesn’t seem to matter where I start, it is the fact that I do that counts, and everything sorts itself out from there.

  19. It seems to me, that we as human beings do not realise the power we have to change the world which is not surprising, as when you look around at the state of global affairs it’s all very overwhelming; there is so much that is needing to be urgently addressed. Any change, whether within our lives or wider out into life, comes from the next choice we make and the next, for with every change we make there is a naturally occurring ripple effect, and therefore the more changes, the more life-changing and potentially world-changing ripples we produce; yes, we have the power.

    1. Yes, I agree with you Ingrid, we certainly do have the power and going into overwhelm and procrastinating is a way to deny our power.

  20. Before we can bring about true change in the outer world we must first go deep within and shift the barriers we have put in place that prevent us from seeing things as they truly are so that we may more clearly feel the gift of what we bring that will help dissolve the mess we as humans have created on this plane of life.

    1. Very true. We feel we have to do, that is what we have been programmed to have as our ‘go-to’, yet the most healing comes when we simply be, because in that space and from that body we will know exactly what, when, and how to do what needs to be done. From this space of being it is done without the exhausting drive and overwhelm.

  21. Where to start is often easy to identify, it is rather the question of how willing are we to get started and let go of the familiar, comfortable but limiting habits.

    1. So true Alexander, we usually know deep inside when it is time to make changes in our lives, but the potential road block is, ‘how willing are we?”. Letting go of all that which has been a big, but not necessarily supportive, part of our lives can be very challenging as we are usually being called to let go of what has kept us in comfort, and disconnected from the truth of who we are.

    2. Very interesting Alexander, this is so true and when we connect to purpose we know exactly what to do and what is needed.

  22. Often we look too far ahead and thus don´t see where to start; the start obviously is always just the next step, hence the answer is always very close, maybe too close, ie. we may need to turn towards something within we have tried to avoid for a long time by looking outside – in other words: we know ! and thus we also know how to distract ourselves away from that knowing.

  23. I also find that when I lose myself in overwhelm, I have lost my self. I love when I am connected there is so much space and I am in the flow of life and in this more is done without the trying or doing, its just done.

  24. ‘It starts with us. It starts with how we live, how much do we care and love ourselves within our own life’ – you could not have nailed it better than this. If we don’t start with us, we will be waiting for others forever and nothing will be done or there will be no difference in the world.

  25. Love the concept of starting with us – it just brings so much simplicity to it. I am moving home and certainly felt the overwhelm of ‘where do I start’ but it really is about coming back to us and knowing what is needed and when.

  26. Yep it starts with us. And I think the reason we over look this, is that we prefer to go into overwhelm about the ‘dramas of the world’, than to look at the ‘dramas of our own lives’. It can serve as the ‘perfect distraction’ to stop you from looking at what is going on for you and what drama you may be creating in your own life.

  27. It certainly does start with us Vicky, I used to feel overwhelmed too but now knowing that it all starts with me living love and that this will naturally be reflected to the rest of world has changed everything for me. Every single one of our choices do matter.

  28. I know that question so well. I know I have looked at many things and thought exactly that. But starting is all that is needed. One foot in front of the other, then the other foot follows right back.

  29. Absolutely, it starts with us. There are so many areas of our lives we have let slide from the truth or the standard of Love we know we and those around us deserve. It does not need to be a big drama, but it does need a consistent commitment to live that level of connection, decency and respect to the best of our ability as our normal. This lays a quality in our foundations that feeds us back the quality we know is needed in the world.

  30. The title of this blog reminds me of the words of a dear and deeply wise friend at a time where I felt lost. I said I felt like I just did not know anything anymore and he said ‘that is a great place to start’. I can feel that in surrender the next step will show itself without effort or trying. It is the fact that we acknowledge that we are not ‘it’ and do not need to ”know’ that brings us the next true step in life.

    1. I love this Carolien, what you have shared what your friend shared with you as it gives us permission to just be and feel what we are feeling. The truth is we do not have to ‘do’ anything. It is not about doing it is about being.

  31. I can so relate to this blog Vicky, I am in the process of clearing our clutter in my home, it feels overwhelming when I see how big the job is, but if I just make a simple start and take it step by step I know it will all beautifully unfold.

  32. Doesn’t matter where one starts from, all that matters is the direction of movement. All else is a given.

  33. Feeling overwhelm at any point in life only occurs when I am trying to put the breaks on my journey of evolution. When I take my foot off the breaks there is nothing in life I am not equipped to handle and trust plays a huge role in letting go of overwhelm.

  34. I love the way you dealt with your overwhelm of what is going on in the world by bringing it back to how you are with yourself.

    1. And, how often do we think about resolving world issues but forget to look within and start to live the love we so desperately want to see in the world? Bringing it back to how we are with ourselves is the first step and this crucial step is often missed when we go into overwhelm and searching for answers outside ourselves.

  35. Yes overeating is an abuse against ourselves. Being much more responsible as to how and what we eat and how much we eat brings with it a new level of care and consideration and a deepening level of respect that allows more solidarity within us to face whatever is before us.

  36. It is important to be open to honestly feel the extent of the abuse that we have accepted as a humanity, as then we feel the purpose that is needed to bring focus to how we live our every day and the level of love we are willing to live with by saying ‘no’ to abuse of any form with ourselves and with others.

    1. I agree Carola and recently it was so clear to me in a way I had not felt before that I do not like conflict or confrontation .. in fact I discovered I will do anything to avoid it, but in doing anything to avoid it it is still allowing it to happen! And not saying no to abuse. A slightly uncomfortable but great learning for me.

  37. Realising that it starts with us and that every choice we make not connected to the quality we know we hold within allows abuse to fester in the world, empowers us to take responsibility for our part in supporting a true foundation and way of living that cares for ourselves through our every day choices and the ripple effect this has to initiate true change.

  38. Starting something that feels overwhelming is daunting, but taking the first smallest step and then the next breaks the overwhelm and a momentum is gathered to do what is needed.

    1. Yes it is like sowing a seed, it doesn’t need to be anything big or grand, simply focusing on the quality of what we do as opposed to doing more will have a ripple effect as the seed grows and establishes itself.

      1. This is huge, ‘simply focusing on the quality of what we do as opposed to doing more will have a ripple effect…’ imagine if this was taught at school, or in work places everywhere… the world’s productivity would shoot up as would the quality of our relationships.

  39. If I ever find myself becoming overwhelmed by what I perceive is coming at me I stop; press the pause button. And in that moment I have given myself I ask – what it one simple thing I can do right now? – and I take the first step. Then I take one more simple step, and another and before I know it I am slowly coming out of the overwhelm and life is coming back to its flowing simplicity. One step at a time is my motto for life – yes I do forget it sometimes but it doesn’t take too long before I am reminded of the power of this simple message once again.

    1. I agree Ingrid, I have just started a new job and have found myself falling into overwhelm a few times, it’s a really horrible feeling. I am now trying to the best of my ability to break everything down into chunk sized pieces, to walk my way through projects one practical step at a time. I have also found that if I don’t focus on everything that I don’t know then this helps me to not get overwhelmed.

  40. It is easy to get overwhelmed by the abuse in the world but if we start with not allowing abuse in our own lives then overwhelm is no longer there. Stopping the abuse in our own lives prevents us from adding to the overall abuse in the world and that is how we do it.

    1. I agree Elizabeth – well said, as this really begins in developing a loving relationship with ourselves, with our essence, with our love within, through which we then feel just how precious and sacred we are, and any form of dishonoring of this connection is an abuse to who we are.

  41. When you look at the world it is overwhelming and it is hard to stay connected and present and not run away. But building that relationship with Love in the body means one step at a time is all that is needed. The quality of the step becomes the focus not the quantity of steps.

  42. I remember having the same feelings of overwhelm when I looked at the state of humanity and when I was feeling this way, I also felt immobilised and felt that the task was too big. Now, like you Vicky, I dropped overwhelm and I understand that everything we want to change in this world starts with us. This brings the responsibility back to me and this feels very empowering and honouring.

  43. It is not the where but the when to start – it is always now, and now, and now again, hence it is every-where.

    1. And what I am really starting to realise with this Alexander is how much it has to do with our movements and momentum of movements. If we are not present with ourselves (our mind completely with our body in our movement, even when we are sitting down, and not looking to the future or being in the past but just completely in the moment) then it is so much harder to go into overwhelm.

  44. I had a moment like that today where I thought where on earth do I begin after being presented with a massive task. I find keeping strong in my purpose for the good of all instead of just for me is always a good place to start.

    1. I like what you have shared here Joshua, for when we don’t make a project about ourselves, searching for recognition or acceptance via our acts, then the product of our work tends to take into consideration everyone it will have an impact on and the quality is then a higher vibration too.

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