by Angela Perin, Brisbane, QLD, Australia
In my life, dancing has been something I’ve attempted, but never really ‘got’. I remember ‘trying’ to get it at the high-school discos – trying to get my body to do the fancy and smooth moves that I saw some of my friends do; trying to exude the confidence that some of them had appeared to master – never missing a beat and technically faultless. The point is, I always felt somewhat awkward. There was something not quite right, and I never felt like I could really let go…
Of course there were the odd flashing moments when I didn’t feel this awkwardness – such as dancing in the privacy of my own bathroom or bedroom (quickly brought to an embarrassing halt when I realised someone was watching!), but this was not consistent. So I settled for imagining what it would be like to dance with absolute freedom and joy, almost (as the saying goes) as if ‘no-one was watching’…
In my high school years, there were the odd (and very brief) moments of connection (when my body and head were on the same page), but mostly I was ‘trying’ in my head to ‘pre-think’ the move and get something together, and the truth was, my body just wasn’t following the instructions! Although on the outside I probably didn’t look as awkward as I felt (I still had some mastery of beat and rhythm), I knew that the way I danced was not totally comfortable… there was still an awareness of not feeling totally comfortable in my body, and I was subtly aware that there was ‘effort’ required to get the moves, which just didn’t seem natural, and felt forced – even when from the outside, they may have looked ok.
In my 20’s and 30’s, the only time I really felt comfortable dancing was after a few (or a lot of) drinks. The alcohol seemed to give me a sense of confidence that I didn’t have otherwise, but looking back – even then, I was aware that I didn’t feel ‘me’… Even though I felt more outwardly confident with my dance moves, they were over-exaggerated (to the point of being plain silly/ridiculous at times). It simply didn’t really feel like it was ‘me’ dancing, and I felt a very strong sense of having to put on a display and show off (which I must add, I had mastered quite well!). Overall, I could feel there was a disconnection from me when I danced under the influence of alcohol, so I can’t really say ‘I’ owned the dancing or felt ‘in’ or ‘with’ my body.
So the feeling of actually dancing just for me was something that largely eluded me through most of my life, and to be honest, I hadn’t really given it any further thought until a few weeks ago…
Now, imagine what it would feel like to be in a large group of people that were all dancing for themselves but with everyone else at the same time? Imagine if there was no alcohol and no drugs, no-one trying or needing to out-compete or out-dance the other, and no-one judging or comparing another’s dance moves. In fact, what if you had people actually celebrating each other’s dance moves? Not by way of “Oh no, you’re ‘better’ than me”, but “Wow, I’m inspired by you”. And – what if there was nothing to prove or achieve (as in getting recognition) by this dancing? What if it was simply a natural expression and way of celebration?
Impossible you say? I say not.
The end of year Universal Medicine concert and dance celebration at Lennox Head on 15th December 2012 was absolute confirmation to me that dancing has nothing to do with ‘proving’ anything: it is not about showing off, comparison, judgment or envy, and it is definitely not about how many people are watching you, or having ‘better’ or more technically advanced or coordinated dance moves than another.
I experienced (in myself and in observing others) that dancing can be a celebration of who you truly are.
In the case of last weekend, the dancing was truly amazing, full of vitality, and absolute fun and joy! What I felt was an expression of a group of people celebrating themselves and each other. There was no ‘hype’ or ‘prep’ or artificial stimulus (i.e. alcohol, drugs etc.) for people to get in the mood – the dance was simply a natural extension of the amazing presentations and concert that had preceded the dance. And because of this, there was no ‘let down’ or ‘regret’ at the end of the dance and there was no ‘high’ to come down from.
For me, I realised at the end, that although I had stopped dancing, (by that stage I felt, [like I’m sure many others did!] that it was time for a shower and bed…), I didn’t stop being ‘me’, and that’s why I continued to feel amazing after the dancing stopped. I didn’t feel less or more of me because of the dancing – I simply felt like me.
I never understood until this particular weekend what it truly meant to dance for, and dance with, me. My deepest thanks to Serge Benhayon, his family and Universal Medicine – not only for organising such an awesome end of year celebration, but for presenting, and inspiring by living example, the consistent commitment to re-connect to the body, and to allow the possibility for all expression (including dance) to come from that connection.
I say… bring on the celebrations of 2013!
The Truth about Universal Medicine 
We all learn to move in specific ways to generate specific vibrations. Some are able to explore different movements alongside a specific level of vibration with others. That is perceived as a problem by those who cannot move like a fish in the water within such vibratiosn. But is it really? Without minimizing the fact that it says something regarding your capacity to connect and express, what the music invites you to connect to and express is also relevant.
Yes Eduardo, it is all about connection, connection with our body, with ourselves, connection with other people but too with that what is given to us by the music which can be an invitation or a force, dependent from which source the music comes from and that is for us to become ourselves consciously aware of.
Connection is key, connecting with our body, with ourselves, and connecting with other people.
“An expression of a group of people celebrating themselves and each other…I didn’t feel less or more of me because of the dancing – I simply felt like me” – this feels absolutely gorgeous, and totally different from a dance formulated performance designed to impress the audiences/onlookers.
“I never understood until this particular weekend what it truly meant to dance for, and dance with, me” – this line and this blog too Angela is awesome.. and it gets you to think about what it is, or what things we actually do truly for ourselves and the way to do this being found in the love of oneself. Having a level of self-love means that love is what we feel first and so is there in whatever we do, (love) dance or no dance : )
Yes to bring the focus back from the outside is so important because then we are more aware of what we are choosing and why we are choosing it such as, am I dancing for me, or to get approval from someone else? Really, our physical body is a way to see what is going on in our subconscious, we would do well to pay attention to the what it is sharing with us.
It’s quite a different experience to dance in connection to the soul, to learn how to express through movement a way that is true to the qualities of our essence – to dance tenderly, delicately, with sacredness and joy. The dance also becomes about how the way I move affects the whole.
I have always been a “good” dancer but I have never been able to follow an instruction when it comes to dance, I always feel uncoordinated when I am attempting to follow choreographed dancing. Free style on the other hand I am in my element. What I missed so much when I stopped drinking was going out on the dance floor and having fun, that is why I look so forward to the dance parties that are put on after the Retreats. The bonus is, I wake up and I do not feel hungover or embarrassed about anything.
Universal Medicine has raised an awareness within me that movement is essentially how we live. The quality of movement is hence the quality of our lived experiences in life. So if we dance for instance and feel we have to try to be something or someone then how much are we also doing that in our day?
It’s truly lovely to feel settled in your body and not think you need to put on a performance or look like someone else!
I’ve always loved dancing but often alcohol fuelled. But something different occurred since being a student of Universal Medicine and attending my very first end of year celebration, I was hesitant at first wondering if anyone would be watching me and I observed everyone celebrating their true self. I joined the dance not to show off, but danced the joy and sexiness I felt within my body – so lovely to really connect and be present.
I totally agree Angela, to dance with yourself and everyone else, expressing how we feel from the inside out is both freeing and inspiring at the same time.
When I move my body with the flow of music that does not impose on me I can feel a connection to the movement within me that I know is my expression.
Great dancers are not necessarily people who have the ability to have the mind and the body on the same page outside of dancing. We have to be able to look at the totality. When we do so, we discover that some people have different abilities to have mind and body on the same page. Perhaps, these different moments do not socially sell in the same way compared to dancing but they are equally important and have to be appreciated.
Dancing from a deep connection to our inner self is such a joy and a lot of fun when we can dance expressing us, and not from how we may look or how we should be dancing, or putting on a display, simply us enjoying the movement of our bodies.
You really are a great writer, I was with you that entire blog! I was a real show off dancer when I use to drink and some might say I am the same now as I am very confident and fun on the dance floor but if you feel me, I am completely different. When I was drunk dancing, there was a subtext with every move I made, it said
” I am overtly sexy and I am better than you” – it’s awful really now I reflect on it. It’s great to re-imprint my dancing style with a family flavor of fun and all inclusive wholesome energy.
Celebrating is just that – a deepening of connection to the body through true movement.
As a former lover of nightclubs and big dance parties I’ve been for the most part comfortable dancing in public but can agree the Universal Medicine celebrations offer a unique, judgement-free zone. But what impresses me most is the music. Produced by fellow UniMed students, it – just like those dancing around me at the UniMed events – is completely unimposing. This includes music in the dance genre. It might have a big beat, but that rhythm leaves me and my body alone. I can really feel now when I hear loud dance music out in the public domain how it attempts to hold me in its sway with its insistent, hypnotic beats. I don’t want to be ‘owned’ in that way anymore and therefore leave non-esoterically produced music aside now and my body loves me for it.
What I have been exploring lately is that the true movement and feeling from the body is felt from within and sometimes the music found today can take hold of you and in some ways move you in a way that may feel slightly out of sync with what is natural to you. Feeling the flow and silkiness of the body and how it wants to move is beautiful to explore and the difference is the true dance is possible in every movement we then make because we are in the rhythm of the hearts own beat.
Experiencing what many do today in this light, one can’t help but wonder just what ‘drummer’ we were moving to, in days gone by… Never have I felt movement so enlivening and easy in my body today, and in my late forties too. The music we oftentimes move to at such celebrations – that of Glorious Music and Sounds of Soul for example – also offers a freedom in the movement our bodies may express. This is music that doesn’t impose on you, it speaks to the love and joy equally known within all. And I have to say, I choose THIS ‘drummer’ any day, over the inner-wrangling I felt in the past with moving to music that simply did not hold you in such a fully honouring way.
So much Joy in reading this Angela, thank-you 🙂 As I know also, the enormity of what has freed up in my own body and the joy I can today dance and move in – in true celebration – thanks to the work and inspiration of Universal Medicine (UM) and also, the profound modality of True Movement that many students of UM today get to participate in regularly…
Bring on the next celebration!
I always despised dancing as I felt uncomfortable in my body. I would always avoid a dance floor. I am now finding how much joy I live and allow in my life determines how I move when I am on the dance floor. If I have shut down expressing myself in life, I will feel awkward on the dance floor. If I haven’t lived by control but allowed myself to express then I am more free when it comes to dancing too.
My experience with True Movement is quite interesting. Initially I was quite sceptical, wanting to show off my moves, the ones I always used to get the attention in clubs – moving my hips very smoothly, projecting exactly that confidence you’re talking about at the beginning of the blog, smiling and pretending that I am loving it. However, during the first time I did True Movement, something happened. I actually began to enjoy it and what’s interesting, I could see that people could see my enjoyment also. Some were so pleased, that their smiles could not come off their face. That freaked me out a bit, I thought to myself “my god, why are these people smiling at me so much”. But now I know, it wasn’t just my joy that they were feeling, they were joyous too!
I have many many a time danced drunk but have now realised that when I did this I thought I was in rhythm but it was a false timing driven by bravado and show not quality and balance.
Gorgeous sharing Angela, and it reminded me of being a teenager and feeling like my dance moves were really not up to scratch and that I just could not move my body the way some people were able to! I found myself feeling clumsy and uncoordinated, and yet this was only because I was trying to impose certain dance moves on my body that were not natural to me. When I look back now, I recognise that many of these dance moves were actually quite harsh and jerky on the body, and would not have felt natural for anyone to do! And having attended some of the Universal Medicine end of year celebrations, I too have re-discovered a more natural way to be with the body and celebrate and enjoy who we are, how we naturally move and ‘let loose’ – what a blessing!
Over the past two days I have been on a training course where competition was regularly used as a motivator. Once in my life I played a lot of sport and so was heavily into competition but in truth it has rarely if ever felt right. Life isn’t about winners and losers. Life is about co-operation, collaboration, living in harmony and in a unified way. Competition may support co-operation and collaboration but only partially and not completely. When we pit ourselves against another we go against our innate call to live harmoniously with our fellow man. Letting go of this comparison with other people is very liberating. Not something I have mastered yet, but I have experienced it for sure and it is very clear which is the truer way in my body.
I love dancing and always remember how i would wake up every Saturday morning put on my little handmade dancing outfits that my mum made for me and dance till my hearts content. That feeling has stayed with me throughout my life and I love to celebrate that freedom and joy whenever I am dancing. A great sharing thank you Angela.
The old way of partying is not for me anymore, feeling like myself at the end of the evening is what I prefer and I also wake up feeling like myself and not drained looking for whatever to pick me up from feeling yuk.
I get the feeling my body and its absolute knowing of how to move and dance freely and joyfully but gets short circuited when I try to think about the moves. I have always found this with learning choreography and would feel quite tense and awkward at times. I have realised it doesn’t help starting from the point of thinking it’s something I have to learn, that I don’t know how to do it and must watch the experts to have any hope of success!
When we reconnect to our bodies we move differently and in a way that allows the body to guide us, and to communicate everything that we need in that moment…and all the moments throughout our day. .I am just beginning to understand how truly intelligent our bodies are!
I can relate to a lot of what you’ve shared about your experience of dancing Angela. Since being introduced to True Movement by Natalie and Curtis Benhayon a few years ago, I have been letting go of the need to look good, in favour of being inspired to learn to move my body in a way that is healing and true for me.
Having just experienced another end of year celebration with Universal Medicine, I totally agree with all you share Angela. The freedom to express yourself with dancing and moving with everyone is a beautiful experience for all to share, such a joyful and expansive feeling.
I certainly have to observe myself astutely when I am dancing as I have used dancing as an opportunity to flirt and show off in the past yet I also have to watch when I contract comparing myself to another. So much can be exposed in the way I move my body which is a reflection in the way I choose to be and live with myself in every moment, every day.
Thank you Angela for a beautiful sharing, dancing with and for ourselves just being who we are is so much fun and a joy, not only on our own but when it is in celebration with a large group of people doing the same, the joy and fun only deepen.
How great that dancing can be “a celebration of who you truly are”and not a performance to show off your skills or attract attention, not a cathartic explosion of excess energy or a display of emotion. Just moving for the joy of it and feeling the freedom of that expression there is nothing to prove or display, no ‘hype’ and no ‘let down’. When you move with yourself you can express who you are through the movement and also enjoy moving with others in joyous celebration.
I can relate to feeling totally awkward when dancing and would recoil if anyone looked at me. I found it an excruciating experience. I love the way True Movement is taught as it allows you to have fun without taking yourself too seriously.
Dancing was something that you had to learn and be able to replicate the steps or moves – it was never about free expression and celebration of self. True Movement combines them both which feels so natural and joyful – it is simply the best!
Dancing can be a full celebration of our bodies connection. It feels totally amazing to allow ourselves be free to express exactly who we are without judgement and others can see that reflection and be inspired too. A double moment of appreciation.
I used to dance a lot but always with the focus on getting attention and if I could impress anyone with it… and even though I was not big on drugs and alcohol I totally gave myself up to the music and often felt very burned out afterwards. This approach has changed with attending Universal Medicine celebrations, which are very different as you describe and inspire to truly celebrate us in our true nature.
I too used to give myself over to music, feeling the stimulation and ignoring how I was feeling to end up depleted. I also never questioned the impact the music I danced and listened to had on my body. My relationship with music and how I move my body to music is changing too as I learn to discern what supports me and my body.
Dancing to celebrate ourselves and each other is miles from what I used to think dancing was about. I always saw it as a show or something to get attention or exercise. But to see dancing as an expression and a celebration and a movement of our bodies is to really appreciate it and how beautiful it can be.
So beautiful to share in your experiences Angela as I too have experienced this same thing. Dancing takes on a whole different meaning when it is done to celebrate the joy and glory of who we are. So different in fact that the way the body feels afterwards is vitalised not drained.
It is such a joy to be with a group of people and to dance for, and with ourselves. The joy just gets magnified and it is so much fun. It is like when we were children and the joy that came from moving our bodies.
It is fun to dance with ourselves, just as we did when we were young children.
It’s a pleasure to read the joy and appreciation you experienced in dancing for and with yourself. There is no doubt that it is truly beautiful to experience doing anything and everything from a true connection with yourself without the need for learning… for in connection it becomes just a natural expression of you without the need for you to do or be anything else.
“I didn’t feel less or more of me because of the dancing – I simply felt like me.” I love this Angela. Being who we naturally are – celebrating ourselves – and everyone – is one of the joys of True Movement.
I’m finding that this joy of movement – whether it be dancing or simply walking somewhere – is becoming more and more part of everyday life. Sometimes it’s just me being silly and playful and sometimes it’s more specific as in with doing exercise movements etc., but what I am connecting to is that this joy always comes from within and it’s the expression of ‘me being me’ that is the central key.
The simple but flowing moves of True Movement at the Universal Medicine celebrations allow you to feel the liberating connection to yourself and with everyone around you and feel the rhythm of the music in your body.
Being ourselves is not popular. We are told what to wear, how to wear it, how to behave, what is acceptable and what is not. It’s incessant. No wonder we feel inhibited when it comes to dancing, which should be the most natural thing ever. There is something very freeing about dancing. Its great you got to feel the joy of dancing like when no one is watching, even though you were surrounded by people.
‘I experienced (in myself and in observing others) that dancing can be a celebration of who you truly are.’ Angela this is also very true for me too, it was not until I actually built up a loving connection with myself that I found dancing to be another form of joy-full expression.
We look at dancing and many of our other curricular activities for a high but whatever goes up must come down. in truth it is the consistency of naturally being ourselves that we all crave.
I’ve always loved dancing and the ‘freeing’ nature of it’s expression – the Universal Medicine end of year celebrations are a whole other level of joy in expression though and it’s awesome being in a room full of people dancing for the pure joy of it, with each other and with themselves.
I’ve always loved dancing and moving my body, it’s been a way for me to connect to my body, as I feel the joy flow through me and all the stuck energy move on. It’s such an enjoyable way to heal ourselves.
Beautiful Angela, dancing with you…. When I go to these celebrations I always look around in appreciation of everyone in there moving with themselves, it creates a dance floor of true movement which feels incredible to move within.
Dancing from how we feel within is pure joy and something I love to do more and more these days. It’s also lovely how free and effortless it feels when we dance with connection to our bodies.