From Giving Up to Reclaiming Myself as a Son of God

For six years now I have been studying, learning and growing with Universal Medicine. Before Universal Medicine, life did not make sense for me and I had given up on myself, others and life.

Growing up, my mother was protestant and my father belonged to another small church – but neither really cared much about religion.

When it was time for my protestant confirmation, I thought about not doing it – as it was my choice. One of the reasons I did it was because of the big celebration which was held for me… and all the presents and attention I got.

I knew the protestant religion didn’t mean anything to me… when I read the bible or heard stories about Jesus I could not relate to it. When I was sitting in church listening to the priest, I didn’t feel comfortable and it didn’t make sense. Singing songs in the church also made me feel uncomfortable – it was rather artificial.

What I liked in school religion was discussing really how to care about others and about society – and this was something I was interested in. But religion itself for me was an empty word and had no meaning. We hardly went to church; only at Christmas as far as I can remember…

As a child I had a strong sadness, I felt very alone, I was crying a lot and felt that the world was different and that people didn’t understand me; I didn’t know how to deal with it.

Later I blamed my parents strongly for it, but it was not their fault. I now see that this is the way I had chosen to Iive for so many lifetimes. I realise how much I had given up on who I truly am, and the knowing in my heart.

When I was in my mid 20’s, I decided that there is no God.

Life didn’t make sense. I didn’t live in harmony and I only saw misery around me.

When I was 30, an illness made me stop and look for a different way to live.

Half a year later I met my beautiful partner and experienced a connection I had not felt before.

We both went to England to participate at a workshop held by Serge Benhayon.

Then everything started to slowly change.

The way Serge lived and what he was expressing made sense: he taught us that everything is energy.

…And life began to make sense again.

I agreed and felt that he spoke and lived truth.

The challenge was to constantly let go of all the things that didn’t support being truly me, and to start to accept and allow myself to feel my amazing essence – that there is love and joy in my heart. In expressing it I can expand and share this with others.

It took years to let Serge’s message in – that we are all love and that it is about being me. So simple.

I began to understand that we are not really separate but one: that’s why brotherhood and harmony with everybody is necessary. And that we are here on earth to reclaim that we are originally divine and loving by nature… then to reflect that to others who have forgotten or, are strongly denying it.

I know now that true religion is in me. True Religion is to be in connection with my divine essence: the connection I have to myself.

All I have to do is become still and give myself the permission to feel me; my Soul and God reveals the depth of love that I am

I am a Son of God. Divine and amazing in essence – we all equally are. And my purpose is to be a reflection of love to other people.

Today I could feel the pain of having not reflected my truth to other people: this hurts deeply in my body.

I can feel how strongly I have held my truth and true expression back to avoid reactions or to not rock the boat. I’ve not allowed myself to be seen and heard as joyful and loving. This was deeply ingrained in me, but now it feels time to speak and live the truth.

I have lived denying my own power, inner-knowing and amazing beauty. Now I am beginning to feel how awesome and beautiful I am.

So, welcome Janina – Son of God.

I am a Son of God and Universal Medicine has reminded me of that fact: and, that we are all equal Sons of God, all-knowing in our divine essence.

By Janina Koch, Cologne/Germany

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517 thoughts on “From Giving Up to Reclaiming Myself as a Son of God

  1. It’s one thing to hear words, another to make them your own, live them and make them part of life. Yes many of us agree, that we are equally beautiful, sweet and kind, but what does it look like to live knowing this? It takes time to discard the false beliefs and gently redirect our energy. But how beautiful life can be when we cease this constant struggling to deny our sacredness. Thank you Janina for the inspiration you share here to embrace and know and test our divinity – we are the real deal.

  2. It’s very honest to say that the only reason you went along with a religion is for the presents and the attention – I can only imagine your realisation when this came to you. Thank you for writing ❤

  3. Beautiful to read Janina of your journey from giving up to reclaiming yourself as a Son of God, Universal Medicine is a true blessing to humanity for always presenting and reflecting this truth.

  4. It amazing to see what we have all done and not done under the banner of religion. I know growing up religion didn’t make sense and I very much related it to going to church and classes at school. If you asked me what religion was I would have said a similar thing, a bible, Jesus, God, the church etc but I wouldn’t have been able to tell you what it was for me, only about the things I did around it. Now with the awareness gained from Universal Medicine I can see more of the personal relationship we naturally have with religion and now meaning much much more then something we do.

  5. ‘…we are all love and that it is about being me…’ You’re right Janina, it doesn’t get any simpler than that. Learning how to live that is another matter – we so love complication! Thank goodness we have the gift of time, and the grace that comes through dedication to purpose.

  6. Ha; Welcome back Janina to the kingdom of God. A true celebration awaits every moment of every day when you live that amazing essence within. Like you say; “The challenge was to constantly let go of all the things that didn’t support being truly me, and to start to accept and allow myself to feel my amazing essence – that there is love and joy in my heart.” – to live every day ..

  7. Yes claiming who we truly are and being able to see and feel the forces that are around the ensure that we don’t feel and claim that can be equally as interesting. I know for me it is a continuing unfolding, claiming I am the Son of God, that I have and hold all the the universe, its wonderment and love right inside of me……that feels very amazing to feel.

  8. In us all lives a light Divine, as pure and pristine as the day we were born. Our task here on Earth is simply to not give focus to what is not of this light and by virtue of this movement realign ourselves with the absolute truth of who we are, where we come from and what we are here to do. In this way we dissolve the shadows that have come to obscure the truth from our eyes and know once more that the depth of love we feel in our hearts is the one and same love that beats within us all. Thus the true Son rises.

  9. We are all so much more than we allow ourselves to be as you have beautifully shared and inspired us here in your blog Janina. When we give ourselves permission to feel who we truly are within we start to return to embracing and expressing the depth and quality of the love we naturally are.

  10. Thank you for your inspirational blog Janina. What you share here is something I relate to in as much as I too have not always stepped up and shared what I know is the truth as often as I could have!

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