From Christian Belief and a Good Christian to Finding True Religion

When I was a child I was raised with a Christian belief, an evangelical and baptised catholic. My father wasn’t an active catholic but I could feel the destructive behaviours he used. As a consequence of his catholic upbringing he acted often out of guilt and shame. And so his decisions for himself and our family members did not stem from love.

My mother was raised evangelical, and my grandmother, a dedicated and ‘good’ Christian. Their Christian belief seemed to give them a comfort somehow, and a feeling that they were ok and life was ok.

In contrast to my father, my grandmother and mother were more consistent in their belief… they went regularly to church and seemed to be more balanced and harmonious within themselves. So my learning was that the evangelical system was good and the catholic was difficult. As a consequence, the different belief systems created separation in the family – not in an open battle, but very hidden, and constantly harming.

In my striving to also become a good Christian, I pushed myself to believe what my family and the church members believed. I wanted to be one of them, to belong to the church group and receive acceptance and recognition.

As part of my Christian belief and upbringing, I was taught that God was a being outside of me and I needed to ‘be good’ to win his love… and I needed ‘to do’ something in order to earn his love.

I was looking for security – to be accepted in heaven and on earth. The problem was that the secure feeling, “now I’m ok and accepted”, only appeared in short moments. My feeling of insecurity remained and even got worse.

On the other hand I had a deep connection to something true within me:
I had a different understanding of God… and one that did not always match the Christian belief I was raised in…

It never made sense for me that Jesus was not married. My feeling was that God loves everybody equally and that his love is not restricted to those who believe that Jesus is the only way.

I had and still have a deep connection to nature where I feel the reflection of God always – in contradiction of finding him only in a church.

Feeling so differently to what the Christian belief system was telling me gave me the impression I was strange. Thus my searching in the outside instead of trusting myself made life more complicated; I felt torn into two pieces. To not feel whole was a normal state for me.

Through choosing to constantly not trust me and my inner feelings, and instead to trust in something else which is not me, I ended up being ill.

My body was hard and numb and I felt very frustrated and exhausted.

At that time I came to know Universal Medicine.

The presentations of Universal Medicine and Serge Benhayon have allowed me to re-connect to myself. I have begun to trust my inner feelings once more. I have started to connect back with myself. My body has now recovered and I am learning to feel deeper and deeper who I am in truth.

I am constantly becoming more and more aware of what is truly going on and thus make choices out of love. This way of living creates feelings of joy, richness and preciousness in my body.

By Kerstin Salzer, Germany

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291 thoughts on “From Christian Belief and a Good Christian to Finding True Religion

  1. God never judges and no matter what our choices are, we are always shown a way to return to a deeper love through our body. The life we have chosen is one which has constellated for us to realize that we are the deep Love that God reflects.

  2. The old religious chestnut and what’s true and who to believe. Are we suppose to get in an argument over religions or convince others that we are right and they are wrong? Are we suppose to tell the world to follow something or someone? Or are we meant to live true to what we deeply feel in each moment and allow others that same choice? The Way of The Livingness offers us all an opportunity, an opportunity to let go of what we have been told and walk our own way. I remember reacting and turning off when I was younger and I remember saying to myself a lot and others that when I was old enough there was no way I was going to church. Why was I turning off? Because I already knew what was being given to me wasn’t true, I couldn’t grab it clearly but I could feel a deep echo inside that didn’t ring true to what I was being told. Now that echo is no longer deep but easily touched and I can see more and more how I was sold and how we are sold the untruths or lies. We set it up or we are set up to live in a way that we think we need to live to fit in or to be accepted. When there is a way to live that holds a true quality of who we truly are and from there we can feel everything and everyone. Not amount of selling will have you sold and it is only from your deep and true feeling that you will move. The Way of The Livingness, it’s how I have always been but not always what I have touched.

    1. What a great addition to this blog and yes the old Religious chestnut; it’s certainly an interesting one, everyone thinks that they have the answer to who God really is and what he wants us all to do. I have always been turned off by all of this and steered very clear of Religion of any kind because the battle of faiths felt like the opposite of what Religiousness on earth was supposed to be. To me, Religion was a way be to reconnect or rebind us to heaven, to live a godly way on earth and that can only be achieved by us following our hearts and what we feel to be true.

  3. Thank you, Kerstin, even though I might have not been brought up religously as in by an institutionilzed religion, I can feel definitely I have picked up on those beliefs, and to my shock also the one: that Jesus only loves you when you are a fan of him or adore and worship him! Auch! Since coming to the work of Serge Benhayon/Universal Medicine and following workshops, presentations and courses… I am coming back to my power of what Jesus truly means and what he had offered people in the world.. all people, yes all people. His love and dedication was to show all people another way and that his love was endless and had no limits. Hence, interesting how this limited version of Jesus has been brought to us, the contrary of what I had examined in my heart that Jesus is. So thank God we all have a heart, senses and we all can feel. Let’s truly use it and not let any confusion, distraction and evil let get in the way of that.

  4. I can remember as a child feeling the separation of the different belief systems. In my case it was an open battle with very little understanding for one another. I felt sad and confused feeling the harm created. Fortunately I only got to experience the conflict a couple of times that I can remember but it was enough to have a lasting impression on me. Surely with there being one true God how could one religion be better than other? How could a religion condemn another religion? What or whose right was it to say that their religion was the one to join? These are just some of the questions I kept asking myself later on in life until I came across The Way of The Livingness and then I stopped asking. I knew and know The Way of The Livingness is the way to be and live. It has no rules or regulations, no preaching, no convincing me to join, no saying it is better than any other religion but supports me to connect to my inner heart and find out what is true for myself.

  5. I love the openness in sharing the difference between how separate religions are lived, in reference to Kerstins parents. A reality that is seen all over the world between religions, a reality that is the underlying cause of many wars. Just how much we are influenced by them is often not perceived or understood, however to deny that there is opposing ways between religions is to deny the innate truth we feel, that instead of feeling that strong true connection with humanity, we instead feel separate, vulnerable and needing acceptance so we are not left to the wolves. Much to ponder here in how humanity responds to what could be an all encompassing, fully loving, tender way of being with each other, if we but let go of our beliefs, be that in religion, behaviors, thoughts or old disfunctional ways of living.

  6. Most of us have unhappy and hurt memories of when at home or at school we were expected to achieve or act out something otherwise acceptance, acknowledgment and appreciation was held back by the adults. It was as if ‘we’ did not matter and it was all about the outcome of our striving. How tragic that this devastating charade has been superimposed onto teachings about God and religion.

  7. ‘Their Christian belief seemed to give them a comfort somehow, and a feeling that they were ok and life was ok.’ It is interesting how we use religion as a belief to give us a form of comfort, when we are truly connected with ourselves we feel God and there is no need to believe in something when we can actually feel it for ourselves and know that God exists in every breath we take.

  8. How amazing that someone raised in the Catholic religion should behave in ways that are not loving. It shows that the religion is not all-encompassing, you cannot be good and go to church on a Sunday and then mis-behave the rest of the week – any true religion teaches us to be love all day, every day.

  9. When we want another to change we can tend to try and push them into believing what we believe. We have all had this done to us and also would have done it to others – but it is imposing. To truly encourage change firstly we need to accept that inspiration initiates the most potent form of change and transformation, and secondly, it is essential that you actually live that quality of inspiration yourself so others can see it, feel it and know that it is reliable and true.

  10. It is very telling that even though each religion in this house was different, in many ways, they still fostered separation. As neither came from within, but instead from presssures of how to be in each religion from without.

  11. The relief we get from another’s recognition or acceptance of us is transient and no substitute for the true joy of living in connection with our essence and honouring that.

  12. I grew up in a religious family and it was always implied that we were sinners and we needed to bring ourselves out of this, this instilled belief did not come from love and I took it on and it set up a belief within me that I should be ashamed, guilty or that I was not good enough. It is hard to come out of that when it is entrenched as it creates a totally different version of love.

  13. What you have shared here Kerstin says a lot, particularly in terms of the harm done to our own bodies and beings, when we subscribe to beliefs that are not in accord with all that we innately know God, and yes also the life of Yeshua (Jesus), truly is and represents for us.

  14. To deny our true and innate connection with God, and deem that it may only be found in a particular building, or via a particular religious doctrine, is to allow destructive forces within our own body that I would say may well lead to illness… Indeed, are we not already unwell, when we do not claim ourselves as His equal Son, and give over to the doctrine of there only being ‘one’?

  15. The pull to ‘belong’ to a group is strong and often we accept what is unloving and abusive in order to not be separated out from the group. Yet the truth is that we already belong to the family that is Humanity, we are all Son’s of God and are the fiery essence of love carried, available and shared within each of us. Man-made religions are being exposed more and more for their imposing nature, control and separative way. True ‘Wellbeing’ is claiming, being and living who we truly are for it is then that we truly belong.

  16. What I am finding more and more is that if we feel we need to belong to someone or a group of people e.g our families or friends we are connecting to a need which inevitably is separating us from the whole. Connecting first to our own true expression and ways of moving our bodies allows us to connect to our inner wisdom and to let go of the need to control. To feel a sense of connection or belonging from something or someone outside of ourselves disconnects us from truth, so the real love comes in our choice to simply make a new movement towards the connection of our bodies inner heart, this is where true religion is lived and explored for life.

  17. “I am constantly becoming more and more aware of what is truly going on and thus make choices out of love. This way of living creates feelings of joy, richness and preciousness in my body” – this is very profound and tells me how on the other hand dis-ease is created.

  18. Thank you Kerstin. It is so often the case that we see most religions claim that a relationship with God, who is firstly deemed as a being outside of us, is found through what we do, the rules we follow and if we are ‘good’ enough in death we will be united with him. What you have shared brings to light that this is not the case, that in fact we already are the Sons of God and our relationship with Him is already established by virtue of this truth, we only need to connect to our essence, to our Soul, to who we naturally already are. This is connection, is what truly defines who we are through which our union with God is always known.

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