Developing a Relationship – with my Essence

Developing a relationship with and connecting to and playfully exploring my essence, was something presented to me by Natalie Benhayon at the end of a revealing and amazing Esoteric ovary massage. Natalie has a depth of wisdom and is a true inspiration to me; the authority of her livingness is incontrovertible. She holds an unapologetic, unwavering solidness of love and an equal-ness for all others within her – especially from her eyes.

Natalie’s session was for me the last of a series of sessions with Universal Medicine practitioners. Each session stood on its own, whilst also being part of a whole unfolding package of myself.

I had an understanding that the underlying themes that came up in each session had their own revelations – a deepening of understanding Who I Truly Am. The integrity that each practitioner brought to their session through their own level of care and steadiness was very obvious. It was palpable and truly undeniable that I too have this deep level of love, sensitivity, stillness and solidness in me. However with this, I could also see the patterns, behaviours and choices I have been using to hold it all back. I can now see how:

  • Dealing with my hurts and being honest supports me to clearly feel and express from my essence.
  • I am love first. There is no need for judgment or critique.
  • I can give myself the space I need when a situation arises and allow myself to be sensitive, understanding what is going on before I respond.

This was easy to feel, listen to and speak honestly about during the sessions. The practitioners all shared in a way that came with understanding, allowing me to determine if what they said was true for me or not, and this was very empowering.

From my session with Natalie Benhayon, and the simple idea of playfully exploring my essence, I have been empowered to deepen my connection with myself every day.

I have been playing with and exploring my essence by creating space for moments to stop, connect and feel by:

  • Laying and surrendering for short spaces of time, closing my eyes and allowing myself to just be and connect to who I am – such as when I wake in the morning or before sleep at night I lay, allowing my body to surrender, allowing myself to just feel. In these moments I can feel a delicateness that feels like a precious, fine yet strong, gold chain.
  • Consciously keeping my thoughts with what my body is doing. Playfully feeling how my deep care and love is expressed in my movements in my simple daily actions – such as being attentive to the quality in which I make breakfast for everyone, how I lovingly get ready in the morning, the tenderness I set my class up in or registering how delicate my hand is as I write on the board.
  • Really claiming the purity of my essence, and what I know is me, the true me, and claiming that as normal. I feel the deep gorgeousness within me, no longer identifying the patterns, behaviours or ways of being that I have learnt growing up, as being me. I am what I feel deep in my heart and very much learning to live that love in my actions and words today.
  • Not identifying with the doubting thoughts, unsupportive ways or patterns as being me. Simply catching any thought or behaviours that feel false and that don’t belong with the loveliness I feel from my heart.

By lovingly supporting myself in this way I can feel:

  • My body, my mind and my being in connection as one,
  • A harmonious flow throughout my body,
  • An ancient knowing and an absoluteness that my essence is who I am – my connection to my Soul and God,
  • Understanding that when I choose to connect to my essence and express from there, that I am in fact directly expressing from my Soul and my connection to God through my physical body,
  • Inspired to confirm ME by supporting my body.

I am: Strong, Harmonious, Graceful, Still, Sacred, Truth, Delicate, Sweet, Tender, Divine, Loving, Silky, Beholding, Gathering, Beautiful, Unifying, Rhythmical, Flowing, Authoritative, Precious, Unwavering, Solid, Equal, Powerful and knowing that God is within me.

By choosing to live this connection every day, developing a relationship with and expressing the divinity of my essence, I am constantly with every choice I make, confirming Who I truly Am and Who We ALL are.

With great appreciation for the reflection and support of Serge Benhayon, Universal Medicine, all the Practitioners and the Student Body.

By Johanna Smith, Perth WA, Bachelor of Education

Further Reading:
Packaging and Opening Us Up
Returning to Our Essence

936 thoughts on “Developing a Relationship – with my Essence

  1. That feeling of surrender, to lay down and allow myself to sink, being aware any muscle tension rather than off in my head. Sounds so simple yet can at times be very difficult if I am holding onto life or myself being a certain way. When I do surrender that essence starts to come to the fore and all it’s amazing qualities.

  2. Building moments to stop and connect to our inner delicateness and sensitivity is so worthwhile as it allows us to bring a deeper level of tenderness and care to the way we hold and move with our body.

  3. Beautiful tips Johanna on how to move in our day to bring connection within. The more we solidify in our bodies the truth that we are already enough and become constant in calling out all that is not us, the more we and everyone else get to feel and enjoy all of who we are.

  4. When I am with Natalie Benhayon I am always reminded of who I am and can feel a beauty, grace and solidness and this gives me the support and foundation to know that I can handle all that is before me.

  5. Johanna this is truly inspiring to read and appreciate, as to where I am with my own essence. A few years ago I was not connected to myself and I couldn’t have felt anything gorgeous about myself.

    Since attending workshops and seeing practitioners of Universal Medicine, I have seen all that wasn’t me falling away and it continues to fall away and the true real me emerging and I love it. I am ‘reclaiming the purity of my essence’ by connecting to who I am too’.

  6. The more we accept that we are universal, the less we need to worry about our physical appearance, as in fact the quality of us living and being in life counts at the end way way more. I have come to realize that we are such deep wise and powerful beings that this current accepted version of life is such lie, as it totally does not expose the truth and grandness of who we are. That”s why Universal Medicine is so important to bring back to our awareness and every day living, for without it, is simply denying who we are in multiple ways..

  7. ‘I am love first. There is no need for judgment or critique.’ This feels yummy, an acceptance and understanding for myself I can bring that’s felt by others.

  8. I was at work yesterday morning and had a moment where I felt anxious.I didn’t try and bury it or make it go away… I said to myself “oh I feel anxious” and that was it. I was also in a position where I could share this with a colleague and we could explore this more. But what I could feel, because it was clearly different to the marker that I had at the beginning of my day, is that this anxiousness was not me. I was therefore able to move on in my day without the anxiousness continuing.

  9. A relationship can not be true without connecting to you, for what you bring to a relationship is what makes it successful, not an act, but an quality of energy that is either love or the absence of that – emptiness.

  10. “feeling how my deep care and love is expressed in my movements” so that every move is felt as an awareness of your Divine essence.

  11. Seeing ourselves as pure first transforms the self-judgement that is so often present. This is not a mountain to be climbed, but a fact to be understood, and from there the path of evolution continues.

  12. Great to highlight how lovingly supporting ourselves by allowing more space to deepen our relationship with ourselves and explore our sensitivity and true quality, builds an ever deepening awareness and understanding of our true selves and the love we are in our essence.

  13. Playfully exploring our essence feels such a loving way to reconnect with all whom we truly are, and allows for this connection to unfold, deepen and support us in a lighthearted way in our daily life.

  14. This is a favourite of mine to read, it’s such a beautiful topic to explore – our divine essence. Every day can become a joy when we live from our essence and to also see and meet others in theirs. There are over 7 billion people and their divine essences in this world, some are uncovered, reconnected to and lived and expressed from, some are yet to do this, but this world contains a wealth of beauty and one day all will be living from the beauty of our essence.

  15. I am so used to seeing my faults but can see how supportive it would be to connect to my essence and all my great qualities during the daily activities I do.

    1. Yes, so true Aimee! It’s becoming more and more obvious to me now when I really push my essence, or my true self to the side simply so that i can fit in or protect myself somehow. As I grow more into myself, I notice that what I thought was protection is in fact not protecting me at all, and actually even hurts me.

    2. It’s crazy how easily we can seemingly forget about the best part of us and get distracted by life, or what’s wrong or whatever, and it’s amazing that however long we get distracted for, it’s always there – patiently waiting to be let out.

  16. The esoteric healing modalities support us to feel what it is like to live from our essence- it is tangible and undeniable that it is there. It is then up to us to bring this quality, and way to our everyday lives. What you have shared here Johanna is very practical – how it is a loving commitment to love first and foremost and to the truth of who we are.

  17. Sometimes there is not the need to change the world, but just to change how we are with ourselves, and in this or from this, comes the greater changes that the world needs, but it all starts on that very personal level where self-love is founded.

  18. There is a flow to life, a deeper connection or love that is available to us all the time if we choose it. It’s not about words alone but movement, how we move sets up that flow or not. Life can deal us up some almost unreal experiences and in place of feeling like we have been dealt a raw deal we can read if we are in the flow or if we are out of it. Then ‘use’ this point as a point of reflection to either return to our natural flow or to confirm and appreciate we are in it.

  19. This is such a beautiful line “It was palpable and truly undeniable that I too have this deep level of love, sensitivity, stillness and solidness in me.” The power of reflection, thank you Johanna, a joy to read this again.

  20. The power of who we truly are. Not something we come across in an average day unfortunately. But when we are reminded, and especially by someone who is living it for themselves, we’re blown away with what is actually possible.

  21. Natalie Benhayon has been such an inspiration and support for so many women to deepen the connection with our divine essence, this is very powerful and far reaching when we live this, as it confirms to other women through our movements to awaken to this same truth.

  22. In developing a relationship with our essence we develop are relationship with our awareness, truth and love and as such we are guided to live in a way that represents who really are, in connection to all that we are. It is through embodying our essence that we come to freely live the richness of who we are.

  23. Developing our relationship with our essence and experiencing how that feels in our movements is the greatest gift there is, as the more consistently we connect to that flow and way of being the more we can let go of unsupportive patterns that get in the way of being who we truly are.

  24. ‘I could also see the patterns, behaviours and choices I have been using to hold it all back’ … that’s just it we have ways which keep us small and it’s about catching those ways and choosing differently and understanding that those ways while old and often comfortable are not us.

  25. Not identifying with negative thoughts is a massive hurdle to knowing who we are. Our thoughts and our self doubts can slowly corrode our lives – but what if there’s no sense to them and we simply need to readjust our focus and step forward without them?

    1. There is something amazing waiting to be reconnected to and experienced and it’s right there within us – our essence.

  26. So many people complain that they are not in a “relationship” but this is not true as we are always in a relationship with ourselves and with others. The type of relationship we choose to be in is however a completely different matter as it can be a healthy loving relationship or a very abusive one.

  27. Thank you Johanna, delightful to read this again. I recently wrote a list of all the qualities of my essence and I originally was not sure I could find 30, but I did, and the awareness of myself just kept flowing out and more qualities added beyond 30. I felt so beautiful after I wrote this and plan to read it regularly, it’s very confirming and feels so supportive to spend time dedicated to a true relationship to myself and to the essence of who I am.

  28. Choosing stop moments in our day helps us to deepen our connection and awareness supporting us to return to our true foundation and steadiness from which to lovingly express and move with our essence and our true quality.

  29. Thank you, Johanna, gorgeous blog on what essence is – that it is a connection in your heart and beyond that never tells you anything, only allows you to know everything that you are.

  30. The more we peel away ‘the onion rings’ we have encircled our being with, the more we connect to the fact that underneath them there is only an immense beauty; the beauty we all are equally.

  31. And just to add to your sharing Johanna the most beautiful thing is that this essence resides in each and everyone of us equally so and all that is needed is for us to connect to it.

  32. It is us, how we choose to live every moment in life that develops and anchors our connection with our essence, or not.

  33. That is the power that is us – a relationship is divine. The more we connect to within us/ourselves, we become inspired to deepen and confirm that love that we are feeling – and we will know that a relationship with oneself and so with all others is divine.

    1. It’s like a momentum or the ongoingness of the relationship builds a deeper flow or connection. At any point you leave or are knocked out of this relationship the depth is the part that will hold you or pull you back to it. This relationship has no end point, no point of that’s enough and if you stop or hold back in this relationship then all signs will point to this and life’s flow will also feel like it has stopped. It all starts and ends with how we are with ourselves, how we move brings whatever is next to us.

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