by SS, Perth, Western Australia
It could be said by some that my marriage of eight years ended after I connected with Universal Medicine. However, there was so much more going on within my marriage before Universal Medicine that it would be very unfair and totally untrue to suggest that Universal Medicine was the reason my marriage ended. My ex-husband would blame my involvement with Universal Medicine.
So what was the cause of our marriage breaking down?
I married a man who I loved and spent eight years with. We had a great life, a lovely house in an ideal suburb, lots of friends, we traveled, and had successful jobs and a child together. Now, as with all relationships it was not always easy, and we had our struggles and issues. We had times when we were unhappy and times when we faced challenges.
The issues and struggles within our relationship seemed to come in cycles – the same things coming up for us to argue about, fight over, yell at each other, sleep in separate rooms, one of us threatening to leave, sometimes one of us driving off. I can’t remember what the actual arguments were over, but I do remember feeling completely disconnected from my husband during these times, very sad, at times angry – and at a complete loss as to why/how we were fighting in the first place. It was like something had surfaced from nowhere and things did not make sense at times.
As for me, I desperately wanted to be in a loving relationship, to work things through, to feel connected and to be happy. I was committed to my marriage and my husband, and absolutely dedicated to making our marriage work. There would be times when I would question my life and I would have a sense that there was more to it, that something was missing. I had a life changing event happen to me at the age of 34 which led to me questioning lots of things about myself and my life. I was still committed to my marriage but the priority was now me, my relationship with myself… and I couldn’t help but look at life differently.
My daughter was three when I suffered from pneumococcal pneumonia, which affects the lungs and presents like the flu. On the fourth day of having what I had been told by a doctor as being the flu, my husband took me to a hospital emergency. I was admitted immediately, induced into a coma and my husband was told that if he had left me home that day I would have died. Later in the day the head of intensive care told my husband that it would be unlikely that I would live through the night. This was to be our biggest challenge!
I did survive the night; my family flew in from interstate prepared for there to be a funeral. I spent the next two weeks in a coma – doctors had done all that they could and if I was to survive this it would be up to me. Needless to say that for all those involved, especially for my husband and family, this was an extremely challenging time.
When I woke up it was not a joyful reunion with my husband as maybe you would first think it to be, or with my daughter and family members. It was certainly not as you see in the movies! I had been very, very sick. I had three organs that had failed, I was suffering from blood septicemia and I was intubated so that I could breathe. My particular coma was not about lying around and resting each day, but one where I was actually fighting for my life. The example given was that each day I was running a marathon to stay alive. Doctors had tried to keep me alive, and hence my system had been absolutely overloaded with an assortment of drugs. When I woke up I still had a tube down my throat to assist me to breathe; I felt like I was in a dream and felt completely disconnected, dazed and very confused. I had people talking at me, telling me what had happened, and it all felt completely foreign. I lay there silent and unmoving. My family and friends were overjoyed at what was definitely deemed a miracle… even the hospital staff couldn’t believe that I had woken up. I was the talk of the hospital as there had been very little hope of me recovering.
So we have a picture of an overjoyed husband who has the love of his life back. We have the wife, myself, confused, disorientated, unable to speak or move. To my husband his horrific two weeks were over and for me, well, my journey was just beginning. While awake and still intubated I had many thoughts of wanting to die… and questioned why I had woken up at all. I had wasted away while in the coma and had lost all muscle tone and definition. I was so weak that I had to learn to do everything again – to sit up, to walk, to brush my hair, clean my teeth – literally everything had to be built up again as I developed my strength back.
And so my physical recovery began.
However, it felt like my husband and I were worlds apart. In fact we had a fight a couple of days after I woke up and he left the hospital. We were both under extreme stress but under completely different circumstances. He was trying to keep everything together and normal – his job, looking after our daughter, visiting the hospital every day etc. I was coming to terms with my physical recovery and trying to make sense of what had happened.
So I continued to recover, moving from physical recovery to wanting to understand more of the what, how and why had all of this happened? Our marriage continued and there was an attempt to get back what we had before this life-changing event happened to our family. But could we ever go back?
So our cycle of issues continued and became more and more regular. The more we desperately tried to hold together what we once had, the stronger the force seemed to be to tear it all apart.
During this time, approximately three months after leaving the hospital, I came across Universal Medicine and had an esoteric healing session with Serge Benhayon. He was the first person that said things to me that made sense of all that had happened re. being very sick. So I got involved with Universal Medicine and did some of the healing courses. My husband, in his own time, also did a course with Universal Medicine and had a healing session with Serge Benhayon.
My husband spoke with a friend of ours about his doubt and uncertainty re. all things Universal Medicine. He expressed his fears about our relationship and that he might not be worthy of my love, and that I might leave him one day. Four months later my husband left the marriage – this was 18 months after my near death experience, and about six months after I started to participate in courses with Universal Medicine.
So did Universal Medicine end our marriage? Absolutely not!
Universal Medicine helped me make sense of what I had started to feel after my near-death experience. That I actually had a connection with myself and it was one that was tangible, that could be felt and that was worth listening to. It was important to have a relationship with myself first and foremost. This is what my husband felt; that I was loving myself more and this brought up his own insecurities about how he felt about himself. So he gave me an ultimatum about me having to choose between him and Universal Medicine. However, he was asking me to choose him over myself, and I could not do this anymore. I had to choose to continue to investigate, understand, develop and nurture what I had been missing and desperately searching for, for a long time – a relationship with myself, my connection to my essence and my inner-most. If this meant that my husband had to leave because I wanted to start loving myself more, then I could not stop him.
Universal Medicine was an easy target to blame. Blamed because my husband felt rejected by me, and thus felt he had been deeply hurt. But the truth is very simple – our marriage ended because I chose to be more of myself. To me, and many of my family and friends, I was still the same person. To my husband, as I became more of me and stopped to consider loving myself more, I was different… and he chose to no longer be with me.