A Beautiful Story

I want to share something beautiful that happened to me.

It starts with me being persistently psychologically and emotionally abused and isolated from the rest of my family, by my brother, being terrorised throughout my youth until 14 years old when I came up with the ‘brilliant’ solution – not of standing up for myself – but by numbing myself with drugs. I couldn’t work out what was ‘wrong’ with me to attract such abuse, or how to behave to stop it. As I grew up I had to invent some basis of self to fit into the world, so my entire self-esteem proceeded to be based upon a tragic array of glamorous illusions of societal constructed prerequisites for beauty and success and subsequent acceptability.

I’ve spent the better part of 51 years trying to define who I am by what I look like and what I do… the problem is, I never could. I unconsciously manipulated every choice towards seeking recognition and being acceptable. I moulded myself according to standards that I didn’t agree with or believe in, that didn’t honour my inner truth, my natural expression, me as a person, or as a woman. The truth is that the constant search of ‘what to do with my life’ always felt empty, exhausting, demoralising and impossible to resolve. The way I looked could never fulfill the world’s ‘ideal’ of beautiful; therefore, by those markers I was never going to be an acceptable human being or woman, and as a result my self-loathing blossomed into an ever-present lack of confidence and slight depression.

This of course, and most sadly, is the way of the world that we live in: most people are bound by these illusions of glamour in some form or another to varying degrees, and most set about resolving them in ways that in truth only feed the illusions.

But I have come to know that it doesn’t have to be that way. That it’s actually the energetic quality of how I am and my presence that determines the quality of my life and relationships with others and myself. I am not what I do or what I look like, but I am so very much more. I realised that seeking external gratification is futile; that I needed to change how I felt about and treated myself, to stop being so hard on myself and start loving and honouring myself more. As I became more loving and tender with myself I grew more self-confident, then more able to accept my innate beauty.

Throughout my life I’ve looked in the mirror and seen all manner of reflections: from feeling ‘I can’t manage more than a fleeting glance’, to feeling ‘ugly’, to feeling ‘sexy’, to ‘that will do’, to being able to look myself in the eye and have a quick pep-talk, or to confirm I was doing ok that day as I could actually look myself in the eyes and nod hello. But the other day I miraculously saw a reflection I’ve never felt before – My Beauty. A beauty that transcended my physical attributes, any need to be different, any comparison, self-doubt or self-loathing. It was just suddenly there and it was amazing. I now know for absolutely sure what beautiful means; that I am beautiful, as are we all, that true beauty lives within me, that it always did and it now wants to shine.

It’s been the unwavering love, commitment and support of Serge Benhayon, Mirtha and other Universal Medicine practitioners over the past 13 years that’s helped me to begin to unravel the web of glamorous illusions in which I’d entangled myself; to stop beating myself up for not being good enough, to start accepting myself for who I am and stop giving power to the old ideals, beliefs and patterns that drove me to seek to define myself by what I do and what I look like. Although these things still strive to rule at times, nonetheless I am able to allow myself to come back to just being me more easily, and more often.

And that is a beautiful thing!

by Jeannette, Sydney, Australia

788 thoughts on “A Beautiful Story

  1. Yes, it’s a huge shift when we not only question those beliefs about not being good enough, beautiful enough, smart enough, fast enough or whatever enough it is, but also begin to accept those thoughts are not who we are. We can be kind and loving towards ourselves when we “mess up”. We can begin to love ourselves regardless of our so-called flaws and imperfections. We can even appreciate ourselves for the qualities that we bring to life and be open to that true appreciation from another.

  2. Everything being energy means that our reflection in the mirror will feed back what we have invested in and projected to be. A mirror is a true reflection of the content of our mind and the ideals and beliefs we have subscribed to.

  3. I used to get attention from the way I looked, however that attention and recognition was in truth not what I wanted for it was laced with sexuality. Today because of the love I have for myself I came to the conclusion only the other day that it is not what I look like that attracts people to express and appreciate me, but the warmth and love inside me that others can feel. This is the difference between looking for love on the outside and claiming the inherent, natural love within.

  4. Just came across this beautiful blog from 2012, and was touched by how relevant it is for me today – ‘I needed to change how I felt about and treated myself, to stop being so hard on myself and start loving and honouring myself more.’ Truly loving ourselves is something fundamental to life, as it is the only way to return to love in full and the grace of who we are by nature.

  5. How beautiful it is to read of your ‘beautiful story’ that is so honouring and appreciative of yourself, and not full of the usual emotional drama. Thank you Jeanette. Such a refreshing read of you reclaiming your innate beauty.

  6. Jeanette, this is so simple and beautiful; ‘I needed to change how I felt about and treated myself, to stop being so hard on myself and start loving and honouring myself more.’ I know with myself that not being so hard on myself and taking more care of myself has made a huge difference to my self-confidence, I feel like I trust and respect myself more.

  7. I love that you have redefined the term “A beautiful story” and made it to be a tale of true transformation and discovery, rather than a perfect, happy ever after story. Beauty doesn’t need to be airy-fairy or exclusively the good bits, it can be real and fleshy and gritty while it uncovers the wonders of life.

  8. Reading your blog I got to feel just how much we have created in this world about it being what we look like, rather than who we are .. our innate being. What I love in what you have shared here is, not only how after finding it really hard to see or connect with this when you looked in the mirror in changing this … realising, accepting and appreciating your innate beauty, the ripple effect is then felt across the world making it possible for all of us to feel, be and do the same ✨ Bringing it back to who we truly are not what we look like ❤️

  9. It is a magical moment when you feel your inner beauty. No benchmark of looks, clothing, shape or age can touch this absolute knowing that you were born beautiful and it is your natural right to feel this way.

  10. Healing ourselves from abuse is a beautiful story, for how many truly heal this kind of trauma that doesn’t impinge underneath their whole life long? The fact you have is a great testimony that should have the whole world sit up, take notice and ask how you did it.

  11. I feel your strength Jeanette as you write.
    So many students of Universal Medicine including myself see their lives changing by the more loving choices they make.
    A true school on earth!

  12. Accepting who we truly is indeed a beautiful story. A story to be shared far and wide for this is why we are here – to realise this truth and live it in full.

  13. When in a world where everything is constantly confirming a worthlessness, feeling worthy is noble, feeling beautiful is exquisite and sharing these experiences is a must! Thank you Jeannette.

  14. We all have a beautiful story to tell, it is true, the story of being all that we are and the light that lies within us all, and once we discover it and appreciate our true beauty we can see it in others too.

  15. Your story Jeannette gives deep understanding to others………..that we all have the power to change things in our lives that do not feel true to us and we can choose to accept our innate beauty we all so naturally are.

  16. Thankyou for sharing your story Jeanette, which is indeed beautiful. Our energetic quality is so important and sharing that with others feels to be such a gift. Looking back to my pre Universal Medicine days, there is no comparison with how I used to treat not only myself but others also. I thank heaven, literally, for finding Serge Benhayon and the Esoteric Healing modalities, which have allowed me to gently return to my true self – an ongoing and forever deepening work in progress.

    1. You’ve picked out a nugget here Sue – how there is a correlation between how we treat ourselves, and then how we are capable of treating others. We can’t pretend to love another in truth, without that being there for us first.

  17. Our connection to who we are within reveals a beauty that represents our divinity, which is out of this world, that which can never be matched or boxed by any ideal or belief that is created and imposed by society.

  18. To rediscover our true beauty inside, is pure gold. This blog is something for us all to celebrate, for one more person to turn their lives around, to be reconnected back to their full expression in all the gorgeousness of themselves, is one less person who is living lost. This might seem insignificant as we live among billions, but on an energetic level this is huge and will have tremendous ripple effects for others.

  19. Just imagine if each and every one of us was given this very wise teaching when we were young, one that was consistently repeated to us as we grew. ‘I am not what I do or what I look like, but I am so very much more’. I know for sure that life would have been very different for me as I am sure yours would have been too, Jeanette. And that fact that we are so much more than we could ever imagine is one the most confirming truths I have been presented with. It took a while to accept but now I know it with every particle of my being and every day live it to the best of my ability.

  20. When we look in the mirror and do not like what we see, it is not because we are ugly. It is because we have been treating ourselves poorly which is then shown in our reflection. When we start to treat ourselves with love and care, that emanates and we need not worry about our hair, make up, or clothes as it all comes together naturally.

  21. This is what we all want, truly, madly and deeply is just to be ourselves, and to live that in the world. Good on you for taking these steps, particularly after an abusive start to life, to choose to be you, the beautiful you and live that for us all to see.

  22. Attacking ourselves seems to be a ‘brilliant’ alternative from being attacked by others. It might do the trick…. At our expense anyway. Once you open the door to self-attack it is not that easy to close it.

  23. It’s surprising in a way that increasing our self worth and confidence is so very simple and happens very naturally, almost as a by-product of choices to look after ourselves more lovingly. These choices to be more self loving sometimes feel difficult to make if we’re used to disregarding ourselves, but the more we make them, and appreciate the effects on our bodies, the more we inspire ourselves to keep going and make this our way of being.

  24. All the ‘looking outside’ of ourselves for approval and acceptance is an excuse to be self-focused and is a dead give-away for not being willing to step up and take full responsibility for being a very crucial part of the Whole.

  25. It is so amusing when I ponder on just how caught up in ‘looks’ we are as women. Most men don’t seem to have the same obsession. The amusing thing is we cannot really change what we look like as we always look like ourself or a version of ourself. We think if only we would find the perfect hairdo or dress or boots, but at the end of the day we still look like ourselves no matter what the disguise or the makeup or the hairdo. We simply only have to accept that we are so much more than this outer appearance and that through connection we can have a sparkle in our eyes and a spring in our step that no money can buy and that brings our true beauty to the fore for all to see and be truly inspired by.

      1. The sparkle in the eye bypasses form as it is this light that reminds us of who we truly are.

  26. It takes a certain dedication, a commitment and what some might call devotion to turn our lives around as you have Jeanette. Knowing what we do on some level affects everyone. We are committing not just to ourselves, but to humanity and there is great purpose in that.

  27. It is indeed a beautiful story one that we all equally participate of returning to our own love, in every aspect in our lives.

  28. From such a young age we are sold a story of what beauty looks like rather than feeling our own beauty from within regardless of any physical attributes. We are all beautiful and when we live knowing we are beautiful we give permission to others to feel their beauty too.

  29. Thank you Jeanette for sharing your beautiful story, it is a joy to read and feel how you reclaimed your inner beauty and are now enjoying living as the true you.

  30. It is interesting to observe what the mirror reflects to us- we see all of what we have been choosing or not choosing to express and so we can either see the fullness or we can see where we have held back or not expressed our truth.

  31. This is what I call a truly beautiful story as once we embrace our own true beauty we can clearly see the beauty in all.

  32. If you can start to see the beauty in your own eyes, is a big step. The next step is building and feeling that beauty, that yumminess again, like we had as children. I am supported by Universal Medicine, but in the end I have to do the rebuilding of that beauty in my body myself.

  33. To come back to ourselves is a very beautiful thing.
    Thanks Serge Benhayon for your unwavering support.

  34. I have noticed a direct correlation between how easily I could look at my reflection in the mirror without judgement and how connected I was with my own inner essence. The times where I was in some emotional reaction to life found me not wanting to look at myself in the eyes, as if I knew I was not being myself.

    1. Absolutely Michael. When we are totally connected to who we are, we have nothing to hide from anyone, not even ourselves and it is a beatuiful thing to look into our own eyes, as we are looking into the eyes of the divine and fully accepting that that is who and what we are.

  35. “I realised that seeking external gratification is futile; that I needed to change how I felt about and treated myself, to stop being so hard on myself and start loving and honouring myself more.” Once we have this realisation, it is miraculous as to what it is possible to change about our lives simply by virtue of the fact that we start to understand that by accepting anything that is less than love, is dishonouring of who we are.

  36. Nowhere have I read something that says ‘A beautifull story’ that then goes on to speak about abuse that was received! And this is in no way shape or form condoning abuse. Instead it highlights the importance of loving ourselves first, as this is imperative to our whole well-being and relationship with ourselves and others. Gorgeous to hear how you now truly see the beauty within you ✨

    1. This stood out to me too Vicky. It was quite alarming to read about the a abuse following the title. But in truth it is absolutely beautiful to allow ourselves the space to look at the abuse in our lives in order to uncover the reason why it is there and then to turn it around. There is much beauty in this.

      1. Yes, it does seem ironic to use the words Beauty and abuse in the same sentence, but what Jeanette shares here is indeed beautiful and deeply inspiring. There is much for us all to learn from this.

  37. I love the title “a beautiful story” because we all have beautiful stories to tell when we accept the magnificence of who we are.

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