Getting Honest about Alcohol

by Julie G., United States

For many years I had what I felt was a strange and challenging relationship with alcohol. I first started drinking as a teenager, when I went to parties at friends’ houses. The first time I drank, the rush was so new to me and felt so ‘freeing’, that I overdid it and got sick. I have been thin all my life, and it never really took much to overdo it, no matter what I drank. One would think that would help me put a stop to drinking ever again, but it didn’t. The feeling I had of being ‘comfortable in my own skin’, to open up and not be shy, seemed to be worth enough that I came back to alcohol again and again all through college and beyond. I had a lot of fun, and I also overdid it a lot and got physically sick and hung over a lot. 

As an adult, when I first got married, I kept drinking socially with my husband, mostly only on weekends, and mostly beer. I drank because I had convinced myself that I liked the taste of beer and it just seemed like the thing to do (i.e., if you go to a bar or a restaurant, you drink). I would watch others drink socially and seem to stay sober, but I would get buzzed so easily.

Eventually, I started to notice that when I drank, I didn’t feel like ME. It felt like some other energy was working through my body. I could feel the moment the alcohol was affecting me. It started as a tingling feeling in my legs and arms and everything around me seemed somehow brighter (i.e., lights, colors). Then there was a bit of numbing, sort of like things were softening, and I felt duller, less aware of what was going on. I started to feel like I was poisoning my body and imagined that I could feel the poison working through my veins. I didn’t stop drinking completely, but it became less and less and I would rarely finish a full glass at a meal. The more I would see the effects of alcohol on the people around me, the less I wanted any part of it.

Then, a few years ago I went to a friend’s birthday party in which we spent the night going to various clubs. Other people were buying me drinks and I ended up becoming very drunk… and very sick the next morning. I hadn’t been that sick since college and decided after that experience that I would never drink again. During this same time, my husband was reading one of Serge Benhayon’s purple books and would read excerpts to me. That was my first introduction to Universal Medicine. What he was reading to me felt so true – and surprisingly, so familiar.

About five months later and after reading the book myself, we attended Universal Medicine courses in the UK. I really felt like I had come home, like I was finding the truth, some of which I could feel I already knew, although at the time I didn’t know how I knew. One of the many things that we talked about in the courses was eating and alcohol. It was a confirmation for me to be presented with the possibility that drinking alcohol truly does prevent me from feeling the true ME, and that there was something I was seeking every time I drank – both self-acceptance and the approval of others. Although I had already stopped drinking by this time, I felt that it may not have taken much convincing to have a glass of wine at a celebration or work event on occasion. Learning the truth about what happens in the body when alcohol is ingested was all I needed to make the commitment to never drink again, and now there is no part of me that would choose to drink alcohol no matter what other people are doing around me.

The beautiful thing is that no-one told me not to drink. I was just presented with the impact alcohol has on the body and supported to reflect on why I needed it, and it was my choice to stop altogether. The only attention, reward or recognition I received from stopping was from me: from the relief and tenderness I felt for myself for making a choice out of a desire to care for me.

605 thoughts on “Getting Honest about Alcohol

  1. Alcohol is not pretty despite the way it is advertised and glamoured up by the press, the advertising industry and movie stars etc. If people were truly informed about alcohol no doubt many less would drink it.

  2. If we connected to our bodies and truly honoured what they shared with us we would not drink or eat most of the things we do. I always felt the alcohol running through my veins like a poison, I never could say I loved it or even enjoyed it. I only used it to loosen up and be more sociable or so I thought.

  3. Whilst you began drinking for the approval of others… you stopped drinking for the love of yourself – this is significant.

  4. I stopped alcohol a few years ago and frankly I don’t miss it. I find it interesting how people respond when I share that I don’t drink alcohol anymore and I often hear them say, ‘oh I can’t live without my beer or my wine’- yet they don’t question why they need it in the first place.

    I enjoy going to a party and wake up the following day with no consequences, I still have fun and remember everything about the evening. I can honestly say I can truly enjoy a party or social gathering without alcohol because you see the real me having real fun.

  5. Isn’t it interesting, that there are choices in life that we make that are for the good of our bodies, and no one seems to pay much attention, but if we act recklessly drunk and make choices that harm us on a weekly basis, we get all the attention in the world…even praise at times for being so out of control. Baffling.

  6. It is very common to associate alcohol with freedom. Alcohol frees me from … X. So, I feel better after drinking it. This is typical. The truth though is that alcohol does not free anybody from anything. All it does is offer temporary relief from life and from ourselves. And, even that has some glamour. We get together and we all get relief from life, from ourselves and from each other together. Drinkers are heavily dependent on alcohol (hence they cannot easily free themselves from it) and by the illusion that alcohol frees them. To stop drinking is not just a physical action. It also requires saying NO to a series of false images we have bought into about life.

  7. Someone I knew a while back got in contact with me and two others by email to say they were an alcoholic and they were now in therapy and part of the therapy was to contact all the people they knew and apologise for their behaviour. There is no judgment from me, I used to drink loads at one point too it was part and parcel of the sales environment I was working in. What I did feel reading the email was that the therapy would not get to the nub of the reason why this person drank so heavily and I expressed this in an email back to them, that was it possible that they drank because they are extremely sensitive living in a world that does not cherish sensitive people so drinking alcohol is a way of numbing or masking how we truly feel?

  8. Whilst alcohol can at times take away uncomfortable symptoms we are experiencing such as anxiety, it prevents us from dealing with what is triggering the anxiety in the first place…hence alcohol buys time but in the end is an avoidance behaviour that does not actually deepen our quality of life at all.

  9. I also do not drink alcohol as I do not like what it did to my body. It is a poison that is why women who are pregnant are not allowed to drink alcohol as this would have an negative effect on the foetus. So in a way we chose to harm ourselves if we drink alcohol and we can feel it afterwards and because I do not like to harm myself consciously I stop drinking it.

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