Esoteric Healing: Coming back to Me

by Jean Grima, Children’s Day Care worker, 43, Sydney, Australia 

When I was a little girl my joy and happiness were immense; as a child I felt a lot. I always felt different to people around me, I was always curious and felt things deeply. Sometimes I felt more of what was going on around me in life than what others seemed to be showing they were seeing and feeling, which confirmed my feeling of being different. People fascinated me, and at this young age I was able to see truth and what wasn’t truth really easily, but as I got older, because I felt stupid and jealous of others’ academic abilities, my true core feelings got clouded with a feeling of failure and lack of self worth.

I put people on pedestals and looked up to what they did; friends, relatives, relationships, parents, priests, neighbours and everyone, really. I soon found alcohol, smoking, and sex at 16 years old. I remember the initial pull of using these things to cope with life.

On the outside I seemed carefree and as though I had it all worked out. People would make comments to me such as “you always land on your feet”, but inside I was crying very loudly, if not screaming with pain. My head was full of thoughts and at times my thoughts scared me. I felt controlled by my thoughts and had no understanding of how to deal with these feelings: I felt this was me and that there was nothing I could do to lighten this feeling. I found reality hard and complicated, I wanted to fit in so much, and so to fit in I chose to make myself ‘small and normal’ so that I didn’t stand out. Doing this made people feel comfortable around me so I felt like I was finally fitting in more.

At this point I was just rolling with the highs and lows because I was constantly and conveniently covering the pain with the vices I was using such as drinking, smoking and mucking around with boys.

Three years ago I chose to have some healing sessions with a friend of mine who had begun to study Esoteric Healing with Universal Medicine. I couldn’t pronounce, let alone spell ‘esoteric’. I trusted her and I felt comfortable; from there I met other esoteric practitioners and other people attending workshops and presentations over the years. I now know and understand ‘esoteric’ to simply mean ‘inner-most’.

Life on a day-to-day basis was becoming less difficult and there was more clarity of thought. Previously in the mornings, for as long as I can remember, when I woke up my thoughts would flood my head and depress me; these thoughts would continue throughout the day and intensified during my monthly period. I now breathe gently from the tip of my nose and follow my breath up into my head and bring myself back to me rather than letting myself get lost in my thoughts like I used to. This has helped me enormously over time.

There was a lot of ‘yuk’ that I would feel which were things coming up for me to look at and at times this still happens, but my fear and anxiety about life began to subside. I started to simply love myself and began to be open to adoring the woman I am… I was learning how to be gentle with myself. This is the most empowering feeling in the whole world – the peace and stillness from the Gentle Breath Meditation is amazing to experience.

What I have found great about Esoteric Healing sessions is that it is my responsibility to heal myself through my own choices, with the esoteric practitioners there to support me, which is a blessing.

So today I continue along my journey of love and joy, coming back to the wonderful person I am and have been all along, but simply didn’t recognise due to the complication, confusion, and doubt that I used to live in.

My family are also benefitting from my life choices as day by day they are now getting to feel more of me around the house rather than more of the moods I used to be in. 

My love and thanks goes to the people I have met along this journey, with all their unpressured, tender love that each of us deserve to experience.

Today, what people think and judge doesn’t matter to me as it did before: the strength in my heart and soul is so powerful. This is a healthy place to be; I know this because of the difference I now feel to how I felt before – I wouldn’t swap it. Those that love me dearly and have known me a long time, including my Dad, see the positive changes in me and often comment on how well I am doing.

380 thoughts on “Esoteric Healing: Coming back to Me

  1. “So today I continue along my journey of love and joy, coming back to the wonderful person I am and have been all along, but simply didn’t recognise due to the complication, confusion, and doubt that I used to live in.” Jean, you are a wonderful person and this blog is so humble for someone so magnificent as you are. I really appreciate the simplicity you present here within your life’s journey.

  2. Esoteric healing has definitely helped me in reconnecting me with my body, and through Serge Benhayon and Universal Medicine I have started to be able to allow my body to take the lead, as it knows exactly what it needs in order to support itself, I just need to remain connected enough to know what that is, and build a consistency in my connection.

  3. Learning to be present and gentle with ourselves through the gentle breath meditation is empowering and allows us to build a deeper relationship with ourselves and with our body, taking us out of our mind and its controlling thoughts to feeling true clarity with our mind and body aligned.

  4. How can a joyful and deeply wise child go to feeling stupid or anything less than divine? By a society that doesn’t confirm children in who they are and makes life about tasks, functionality and doing things well instead. Of course, we need to do things, tasks and day-to-day living, but this can be done in the confirmation that we are wise all-knowing beings and not less than any other.

    1. Well said Rachel – there are clearly 2 ways to approach and do…and doing without being just feeds this lack of self-worth that plagues so many young people today.

  5. Healthy, yes, that place of ease and acceptance is a very healthy place to be. I haven’t fully appreciated how much my life has changed and how much I now enjoy my life.

  6. Universal Medicine presents many modalities including Esoteric Healing to support us to connect within. Esoteric Healing heals in a way that offers an opportunity for us to get to the energetic root that created the ailment or condition in the first place so what I would call a true healing can occur in the body. For this reason Universal Medicine and Esoteric Healing in my opinion stand alone in what is offered in the world of complementary medicine today.

  7. You are amazing, what you are reminding us of here is how much we feel as children, we feel it all and actually, we still feel it all! We simply learn some effective numbing techniques that mask or deny what we feel.

  8. I agree – Esoteric Healing is about re-learning to take responsibility for the choices we have made and will be making. It is undoing of all that is not of truth as we are already, innately that. How amazing is that it can start with simply choosing to be gentle in how we move.

  9. What stands out about what you are sharing is that you are taking responsibility for your life and your choices now. You are healing yourself and Universal Medicine is facilitating and supporting this.

  10. Thank you Jean for sharing your journey of returning to find a beautiful and loving woman deep inside by connecting to your inner heart through the gentle Breath Meditation.

  11. “This is a healthy place to be; I know this because of the difference I now feel to how I felt before.” Your so right Jean and this is true health, wealth, wellbeing and love as you have described – “the strength in my heart and soul is so powerful.” and so much more.

  12. Learning to love and be gentle with myself was the turning point to coming back to knowing the truth within and building a true relationship with myself, connecting to an inner wisdom and quality and a steadiness of being.

  13. When we withdraw from the love that we are, that we knew and expressed so completely as a child, we create a seeming chasm within us through which we invite in a whole host of thoughts and ensuing behaviours that are not true to our inner-most self. This is how we become shaped to be who we are not and find ourselves entertaining thoughts and behaving in ways we know does not make sense. Making the choice to close this ‘gap’ is the first step on our journey home back to the love, joy and divinity we all innately are – a step we will all at some stage take on our return to Soul. The question is simply – when?

  14. No going back! Why would you, when everything you’ve ever wanted but weren’t actually sure what that looked like, is now something you live everyday. It’s pretty cool realising that we have everything we need right inside us, and that no amount of material possessions or fitting in with others will ever satiate our desire to simply be ok with ourselves.

  15. I still feel that intense curiosity and love of life to this day – I know when I’m me because it’s there in every particle, and equally I know when I have lost it and got a bit down trodden by other things piling in on top and trying to dampen that innate joi de vivre.

  16. The beautiful thing about Sacred Esoteric Healing Sessions is that it is not a quick fix or a relief but is a totally empowering experience as we are not healed by another but it is through our willingness to take responsibility and align to that which is of truth within ourselves that whatever is not it is quickly dispelled from the beingness of who we are.

  17. Having an Esoteric Healing is an opportunity to stop, connect and choose to surrender to the wisdom of our bodies and their willingness to reconnect to the harmony within. I also love how each practitioner is there to support your body to be exactly how it is to be naturally and that is very lovely to feel and it all comes back to our choice to surrender to a rhythm that was their the day we were born. Truly amazing.

  18. It is amazing that something as simple as the Gentle Breath Meditation has had such a positive impact on so many people’s lives – I know for me I was introduced to the Meditation through a practitioner and it was so powerful that I knew I wanted to know meet Serge Benhayon and attend Universal Medicine presentations because of the difference I felt in my body after about 10 minutes.

  19. I loved the phrase of that healing is a choice. Where we can be open to receive support with our healing, but never can anyone heal us. This takes the whole illusion away that people heal you or you can heal someone. This is simply putting the power outside of you – which can not actually be done , as the power is only inside you.

  20. Re-connecting to our heart and our bodies is where we find our clarity and it is from there we feel just as joyful, curious and playful about the world around us as we did when we were children and that is indeed a gift for us all.

  21. This line is a stand-out: “Today, what people think and judge doesn’t matter to me as it did before: the strength in my heart and soul is so powerful.” This is what keeps us so steady and connected to ourselves, building a connection with our heart, soul, body means that we are stronger in ourselves and we are not so thrown around by life.

  22. “I was constantly and conveniently covering the pain with the vices I was using”, you describe here a phenomena we have become so used to that it has become part of life, we distract ourselves to not having to feel where we are really at. And to stop this cycle requires a willingness to change and courage to look at our own hurts and heal them so we can meet the world with more clarity instead of contributing to the pain there is.

  23. This puts a completely different look at life. Everything is so geared to you achieving something to be worth something or to be something and yet here we have a modality or a way of being that is simply allowing or supporting you to be more of what you already are. No place to go or nothing you can do can scratch the surface of who you already truly are naturally and we only need support ourselves to allow it out. It’s a different look at life that actually works and what’s more it supports more then you and touches everything and everyone around you, reminding them of this equal feeling. We already are everything and it’s now for us to return to.

  24. “What I have found great about Esoteric Healing sessions is that it is my responsibility to heal myself through my own choices, with the esoteric practitioners there to support me, which is a blessing. Esoteric healing modalities are so empowering. Instead of sitting back and hoping someone else will fix you, you realise that you are the one that does the healing, which is very empowering

  25. Awesome to read of your experiences of healing, and how empowering it has been – knowing that no one can actually ‘heal’ another – that it’s about self-responsibility and putting the work in one’s self, and using the tools only to support and help us to get there. It’s always our choice as to whether we want to heal our issues, and if so, how quickly.

  26. The beautiful offerings via Universal Medicine have inspired so many people to make positive and lasting changes, and I’m one of them. The observations of those who know you are powerful testimonials as to their efficacy, as is your own.

  27. We constrict ourselves so as to fit in the box all others seem to have equally squeezed themselves into. The problem here being, that when no one is wanting to stand out from the crowd, there is no one left standing outside the box to point out the absurdity of the situation we have all got ourselves into.

  28. I love the absence of judgement in your writing, and I love how you describe the wonder of returning to how wonderful you are, the way you describe life is like it is an amazing adventure – which is exactly what it is.

  29. One of the greatest joys in life, which this piece so readily displays, is to watch another person return to the truth of who they are.

  30. When we come back to listening and feeling our connection with our body and what it is communicating, we start to live from an honesty and true clarity that allows us the space to live more and more from our body’s natural rhythm and from this quality and flow life feels far more simple.

  31. Taking a moment to consider our choices and ask ourselves is there more to learn and understand about life and how I live it allows us to appreciate every movement as one of growth and that no matter what we can continue to uncover more love, truth and understanding of who we are and how we in turn live life everyday. Our bodies are wise and when we take the opportunity to listen and learn from what is shared it’s amazing to see the transformation of who we truly are unfold.

  32. ‘It is my responsibility to heal myself through my own choices’ is such a powerful statement Jean. How many people blame others for not fixing them or solving their problems when they themselves are accountable for the choices they have made. Its only when we take responsibility does true healing occur. It’s really amazing to read about your childhood and how you transformed to who you truely are compared to the suit your wore which didn’t belong to you on the first place.

  33. I feel like this too, “Today, what people think and judge doesn’t matter to me as it did before: the strength in my heart and soul is so powerful.” because I now know the strength and power of our souls are equal and at one.

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